Why Are You My Clarity? Chapter One
Kurt couldn't forgive Blaine about this, right? I mean, they both had their share of promises that they broke, but Blaine's was bigger than all. He couldn't understand why Blaine cheated in the end, anyways. If anything was bothering Blaine, he would always tell Kurt, even if Kurt had to nudge it out of him. But when he admitted cheating, he didn't even stall. He just came out and said it.
"I was with someone."
Kurt was heart broken that night in the cold streets of New York. He actually went home and pulled out a bag from years ago, but he still kept. The one that contained every blade he could find. He opened it up, tears running down his face, taking the sharpest blade in there and brought it to his pociellen wrist. Thank god Rachel was in the dorm to stop him, becuase it could've ended- no, would have ended- bad. Very bad. He couldn't even wear that same outfit again without bursting into tears everytime someone complimented it- or even commented on it. When someone asked him if he was alright, he would just end up tearing up or completly bursting into tears right then and there. He would never mean to, but it would just happen. He really hated himself for getting so upset about it. You should be angry, Kurt thinks. Not upset. But he couldn't bring himself to be. Because, a small part of his brain- and a very small one at that- was shouting "GO TALK TO HIM! YOU STILL LOVE HIM!" He would try to drown that part out, but most of the time it would just come back to haunt him later. He couldn't go back to Blaine, as much as he wanted to, he just couldn't. And if that meant he just had to cry it out until it went away, that's what would happen.
It was a cold November morning, and Kurt was working on a project for Vouge with Isabelle. He was busy at work, typing away on his computer when he recieved a call from Rachel, even though Rachel knew he was probably at work. Will she ever learn? "Hello?"
"Kurt!" Her voice boomed through his cell phone, and others around him looked abruptly towards him. "Oh my gosh, Kurt! I... I need- need you, please..." Wait, was she- was she crying?
"Rachel what's wrong?" Kurt questioned, mouthing to Isabelle that he would just be a second before walking to the bathroom.
"It's- it's Blaine!" When Kurt heard the sound of his name, Kurt's heart jumped. Blaine?
"He just.. oh god... he-he got s-sh-" Kurt didn't need to hear anymore. He was already rushing out the bathroom door, and only heard some parts of what Rachel was saying.
Blaine.
Shot.
Arm.
So much blood.
He's been screaming for you since he got shot.
Get in Lima.
He needs you.
By the time Kurt was in the car, he had tears streaming down his face, and tried to composer himself enough so he could hear Rachel's end of the conversation. "Kurt, I know you don't want to, but Blaine is next to me in the ambulance car, he's asking for you, god Kurt- he's crying so hard."
Kurt considered before he answered. Even though this was the boy who had cheated on him not but a little over a month ago, this was also the boy who was his missing puzzle piece. Through thick and thin, he could always be here for Blaine when he needed him. And he knew Blaine was thinking the same thing. So, without another thought, his voice came with a "Yes, Rachel, please, let me talk to him."
There was muffled sounds in the background before he heard the voice that he's been waiting to hear since the breakup. The voice that belonged to that hazel eyed, curly haired, bowtie lovin' boy that he onced called his love.
"K-Kurt?" Blaine's voice was thick and raspy, sounding weak and Kurt could tell he was crying.
"Blaine, calm down, ok? Everything's going to be ok... shh..." Kurt tried soothing him in every way possible; Blaine's cries getting somewhat softer.
"I really w- wish yo-you were h-here, Kurt," Blaine managed to get out between sobs. "I know y-you might not want to be, be-because you h-hate me and all, but-but..." he trailed off and couldn't finish the rest of the sentence.
"Blaine, I don't hate you. I'm trying to find a plane ticket, I'll be home ASAP then I'll pack and be on a plane. I'll be there, Blaine." Kurt wasn't enthusiastic about going to Lima, but Blaine needed him.
"Th-thanks Kurt. I lo-love you so much."
Kurt again hestitated before continuing. "I love you too, Blaine. I'll be there soon. Be strong for me."
"I will Kurt. Bye, I'll see you soon."
"I'll see you soon, bye." And with that, Kurt was left with only his thoughts, a plane ticket, and lots of damn traffic.
I love you so much.
I love you too, Blaine.