Metal Gear Weevil: Code Monsoon
Up in his penthouse suite at World Marshall HQ, Monsoon lay on his bed bored and fed up. He had just taken a pasting from Raiden on Revengeance mode, which had severely dented his pride and his dome. He needed something to cheer him up. Normally he would have amused himself by polishing his magnets, in particular his wheel and Distopia but he was that annoyed that this time, these things would not suffice.
No, I have to fight these urges, he thought to himself as dark thoughts crept into his mind.
He had tried to fight them before and managed to supress them with super strength Nanomachines. If people knew about the feelings he had, he would be cast out as a disgrace to all Desperado. He would be fired from his position and branded a weirdo, a freak, an abomination. Nobody would ever speak to him again, if they ever found out about the hideous fetish he longed for…
Mutation.
No!
"I can't," he whispered to himself.
At that moment he felt his codec buzz: a message from Mistral. He groaned in displeasure.
'Hey sexy, fancy some company tonight? I want to feel you deep inside me again.'
Oh God, that terrible night at the office party, she had got him drunk and they had done things… the Geckos… oh dear god those little dwarf Geckos… NO! He felt sick even at the blurred memories of it. It was horrible. But it had made him realise one thing for certain, cyborgs definitely did not excite him. In fact other cyborgs repulsed him, he longed for other things to satisfy his… 'urges'. He hastily called her back telling her, 'No thanks. I'm polishing my wheel,' and switched it off. His endeavour could not be disturbed.
It was the push he needed. He double checked the door was locked, closed the curtains in case of any peeping sliders, and pulled out his personal laptop. Nobody knew of its existence. They couldn't. He felt guilty and disgusted at himself for what he was about to do.
Mutation.
He didn't know why it turned him on so much.
T-virus, G-virus, Uroboros, T-abyss, Code veronica virus, C-virus… Oh yes!
He felt all his magnets tingle as he typed in the website . Oh yes… the images on the screen pleased him. Hunters, Majinis, J'avo's, Ogroman, Ustanak and those lickers… Damn. Mutation was his guilty pleasure. It was frowned upon in the society he lived in and his reputation would be destroyed if anyone even had an incline that this was how he got his kicks. Soon all feelings of guilt were gone as he was overpowered by lust and fierce desire. Looking at pictures wasn't enough anymore. He wanted to touch. He was not normally one for crudeness but he really longed to fuck some poor virus ravaged, mutated soul until they screamed his name in the most inhuman monstrous tone.
He searched for singles profiles. Maybe there was a mutant out there who harboured feelings for cyborgs. If she was out there, he would find her. After trawling through countless pages, he came across his dream date by the name of Alexia Ashford. He rubbed his chin and mused, "Exquisite."
She was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. Those tantalising tentacles, sexy scales, her burning red eyes… Monsoon was head over heels in love. He hungered to taste her sweet body. Boldly, he sent her a friend request and hoped she liked him too. Generally, mutants went with mutants, cyborgs with cyborgs and the two never crossed. It was an unwritten rule in life. Only the deep, dark and disturbed ever entwined them and Monsoon qualified for all three. Hopefully Alexia would too. She certainly looked like a twisted individual.
To his delight, she responded immediately.
'Hello my dear. How are you?'
Now Monsoon's magnets were well and truly buzzing. He shivered as they vibrated and he typed back, 'I'm fine. You're a pretty mutant.'
'Thank you. Are you worthy of my power?'
'I hope so. Let me show you nature's law so we can find out.'
'Oh what fun!'
They chatted at length, Monsoon's magnets now on red alert and vibrating like crazy. His cyborg heart was racing as was her virus ridden one. From their Internet conversation, it soon became very clear to Monsoon that Alexia was indeed into cyborgs.
Her message, 'I want to ride you like a donkey eeoorrhhh!' confirmed this.
Monsoon concluded that they were meant to be together, their souls were entwined. Never before had somebody sent him such a delightful message. He desperately wanted to be next to her and show her all his moves, maybe even introduce her to Distopia and Lorentz the Wheel. Perhaps he would even let her stroke them. He was also eager to see some of her moves too. Then suddenly, a new message:
'To meet or not to meet? I would love for you to come and serve me.'
It was as if she had read his mind! He told her nothing would give him greater pleasure. She told him her address, a castle on a place called Rockfort Island. He would have to catch a boat to get there! What a mission, plus he was a little nervous at being the only cyborg there but he knew that she would be worth it.
Early the next morning before the sun had even rose, he woke and polished himself up to be exquisite and stuffed his pouches full of 'essentials' for his meeting with Alexia, chuckling sinisterly to himself. At long last, he would be able to act upon his fantasies. He pulled a cheeky sickie with work, telling Armstrong that he felt too weak to come in, he was suffering with the dreaded glitch, and would need a few days in bed to recover.
"Huh, candyass, you need better nanomachines, son," Armstrong grunted at him.
Monsoon grinned silently to himself; if he only knew. He said goodbye to his beloved wheel as it was too big to take with him but he would take Distopia, just in case of trouble, and scurried out to the port under the cloak of darkness.
He arrived at the port and looked at the destinations:
'Skyrim' hell no, 'Silent Hill', tempting but maybe some other time, 'New Vegas' definitely when he had more caps to spend, ahh 'Rockfort Island' – Gate 666 for the Queen Zenobia.
Monsoon waited in line to board and realised that in his rush, he had forgotten to book a damn ticket! How could he have been so stupid? Head was all clouded up with Veronica virus! However, he knew there was no need for panic – it was a mistake that was easily rectified. Thinking of his motto for life, 'the strong prey upon the weak' he spotted a young woman, Jill Valentine, standing alone in the queue. A smoke grenade would have been useful here but there were too many other people around, he had to try something more discreet. He sidled up to her in his purple aura, detaching all his parts and glitching ever so slightly to shock her and throw her off guard.
"Err… can I help you?" she asked, a hint of distain in her voice.
Cyborgs were very rarely seen in these lands, especially one as freakish as Monsoon. They were often met with hostility, born from fear. Weaklings deserved everything they got he figured. At least his darling Alexia was not so narrow minded. And Jill was not even mutation… eurgh. Humans repulsed him even more than other cyborgs.
He stared over her shoulder at nothing, a false look of horror slowly descending on his face and began to point with his one hand, while slyly detaching the other.
"What… what is that? Good god is that a wheel?" he asked, a staged quiver in his voice.
As predicted, Jill turned and looked at the fake distraction, giving him chance to quickly send his free hand into her back pocket and snaffle her ticket. Was she that stupid? On realising there was nothing there, she turned back and asked him, "What the hell? There's no wheel there what are you talking about?"
"Oh, I do apologise," he smiled back at her falsely. "As you can see, my eyes are not the best. In fact I don't have any. I must have been mistaken."
Jill's expression changed while Monsoon felt smug; she hadn't even realised she'd been robbed. The smugness soon turned to anger when he saw the pity in her eyes. Damn, if she knew the power he wielded! He did not need her pity!
"It's OK, don't worry about it, you do look like there's something wrong with you; you're awfully glitchy," she said and pulled out some kind of plant from her pocket… "Here, take this."
What was this? A blue herb? What the hell was a cyborg meant to do with a herb and why on earth was it blue? Was he meant to eat it or smoke it? He thanked her anyway; perhaps it would come in useful later. Maybe he could give it to Alexia as a token of his love. And he really resented the comment about there being 'something wrong with him'. And as for 'Glitchy'? How rude! He wanted to snap back 'at least I'm not laggy' but knew better than to lower himself with such childishness. He quickly moved away before she noticed her ticket was missing, shaking his head at her ignorance.
Little did he know, Jill's extremely possessive boyfriend was working as head of security and had seen on CCTV what he had done. Seething with rage, Nemesis vowed revenge.
Aboard the ship, Monsoon began to feel even more out of place. It was teaming with BOW's alike. He was definitely the only cyborg. He sat on the deck, attempting to be discreet, and watched them intently as they crawled, slithered, scurried and stomped past. They looked so much more endearing in the flesh; the screen on his laptop did not do them justice. And to see the many different ways they moved and hear the grunts and groans enchanted him in ways he had never thought possible. His magnets were vibrating again and his purple glow was exceptionally bright – damn it could be embarrassing sometimes, he may as well have had a beacon above him saying 'Turned on cyborg right here!' Of course, he never had this problem at home…
The view of the choppy waters soon put a stop to his arousal as a wave of seasickness hit him. Missing the bright lights of Denver and his precious wheel didn't help either, and neither did not being able to flaunt his powers. It would freak them out and he didn't want to run the risk of being thrown overboard. His appearance was unnerving enough for them, they couldn't handle him in his terrifying true form. Weaklings.
He went inside before the seasickness made him do anything unpleasant and headed for the bar. If ever there was a time for some Nanopaste it was now. The barmaid was a gorgeous blonde named Rachael who was oozing with T-abyss virus and Monsoon's mood was immediately uplifted. Wow, she was stunning. Not quite as stunning as Alexia but still hot enough to get his magnets going.
"Hiya, what can I get you?" she giggled flirtatiously at him.
"A double shot of Nanopaste please," he smiled at her.
"Nanopaste?" a look of confusion spread upon her mutated face.
"Yeah, you know, Nanopaste! White putty stuff that makes you feel good."
"Oh, amphetamines?"
"No!" Monsoon snapped impatiently. "NANOPASTE!"
Rachael glared at him angrily, "Do not raise your voice at me, cyborg. I am sorry but we don't do this Nanopaste you speak of."
She practically spat out the word 'cyborg'. Monsoon composed himself, they were bound to hate him if he lost his temper so quickly and yelled at the staff. He had to be polite.
"Forgive me, I'm just a bit on edge, what would you recommend then sweetie?" he grinned extending his hand across the counter in an attempt to offer his friendship as a disguise for a cheeky feel of her slimy flesh.
She swiftly pulled away intimidated by his glow and the strange humming sound his magnets were generating, and went on to show him the top shelf. Of course, this was BOW land. He had to drink whatever they did. The top shelf boasted a string of vials containing all manner of strong viruses, some of which he had never heard of.
Rachael looked him up and down, the corner of her upper lip curling in disgust at him.
"Well for you, I would say the G-virus."
"Is that your best?" Monsoon asked.
"Yes. Hurry up and stop wasting time with your unnecessarily long cut scenes."
"I'll have that then."
Again, he decided to take advantage of his abilities and detached his hand. If she wouldn't let him touch her innocently then he would cop a feel of her ass when she turned around to get his beverage. That would teach her. Oh, it felt good… so slimy… yes. His first touch of mutant!
"Eek what was that?" she shrieked.
Monsoon quickly returned his hand and smiled innocently, "I don't know. Nothing."
"Here," she said abruptly slamming the purple vial down on the bar. "That's 1000 exp."
The taste of the shot of G-virus was vile, resembling feet and armpits. Monsoon tried not to shudder as he necked it down in one. A big smirk was now on Rachael's face, like she knew the effect it would have on him. Within minutes it started to surge through his body.
To his horror, bits of his leg began to detach all by themselves and move away from him. Arh! What was this madness? He felt extremely dizzy too and was in dire need of a comfy place to sit down. He saw a sofa on the other side of the room and staggered to it, leaving a trail of pieces of his thighs behind. He collapsed on it and shattered all over the place, squealing. A foot rolled over to Ustanak who had been enjoying a quiet pint of C-virus, which infuriated him greatly. He snarled and booted it back towards the metallic mess and landed it in the side of Monsoon's head, turning it to face his violently twitching arm, as if it wasn't bad enough being kicked in the head with his own foot.
He stammered to himself, "No, not the glitch. Please don't let me get sick with glitch!"
"Pull yourself together!" Ustanak bellowed at him. "Nobody wants to see that weird shit around here! You may be able to do that fucked up stuff where you come from but we will not tolerate it on this ship! If you can't handle your G-virus then stay the fuck out of the bar!"
The angry yells of a huge, lumbering BOW snapped Monsoon back to reality and he did indeed pull himself together. Now everybody in the bar was staring at him. Two hunter children were that traumatised, they were in tears.
"I can take it," he said defiantly.
Thank god, his arm had stopped glitching. That was a relief. A nasty glitch infection would not look good in front of Alexia. It was of little comfort against the sheer embarrassment of falling apart in public, especially in front of such judgemental BOW's that he wanted to impress.
"Obviously you can't!" Rachael taunted from the bar. "Anymore of your freaky glitchy cyborg shit and I'll call security!"
Monsoon dusted himself off and muttered, "Ridiculous."
Why did these creatures hate him so much? Bad memes, it must have been. He could break this ship in two if he wanted, maybe he would once he was off it just to teach them a lesson. Parts of it would make lovely additions to his wheel…
Monsoon needed some time to recover from his shot of G-virus. Despite being able to hold himself together, there was still something not quite right. His fingers were tingling and he had a weird sensation in his arm. Urh. Hopefully it would ware off soon. He would certainly stick to Nanopaste in future, virus did not agree with him.
Feeling increasingly angry that his trip was going downhill, he needed something to pick his mood back up. The Queen Zenobia had a casino; he could have lots of fun there.
On his way there, he attracted lots of stares and whispers.
"Look at that!"
"What the fuck?"
"Oh my god, stay away from it children!"
"Holy shit, I knew cyborgs were gross but that one… EURGH!"
"Hope it doesn't get near me, it has a nasty disease."
This vexed Monsoon even more. Did they think just because he had a big dome on his head that he was deaf? Or were they so arrogant they didn't care? He wanted to scream in their faces to stop referring to him as 'it' and 'cyborg' and that he did not have glitch! He had a name!
"My name is Monsoon of the Winds of Destruction!" he triumphantly told the cashier at the casino.
"I don't care who you are, behave yourself and none of your weird coming apart shit," she responded, flinging his chips across the counter.
How did she know what had happened in the bar? They must have been contacting each other on codec. Damn these BOW's, they were really starting to get to him. Despite starting to hate their ignorance and downright racism, he was still shamefully attracted to them.
He made his way to the slot machines, where he spotted Jill again. How did she get on the ship without a ticket? It didn't matter. In fact he was glad; she was weak and he could toy with her again.
She was piling all her coins into slots and getting increasingly frustrated. Every time she lost, not because of her bad luck but because Monsoon was using his magnetic power to rig the wheels. He laughed maniacally to himself as Jill put the last of her coins in and lost again.
"That's enough of that," she muttered bitterly and stormed off.
Monsoon swept in on the abandoned machines and used some of nature's force to drain it of its contents.
"I have won this," he giggled to himself as he filled up his pouches.
It was a big mistake on his part. Again, his dastardly deeds had been spotted by Nemesis, who was following Jill around on the CCTV.
Up in the security office, he slammed his fist down in rage.
"Who is this freak who keeps picking on my lovely Jill? I am going to blast it into the middle of next week," he fumed patting his rocket launcher.
At that moment, Rachael entered to report the incident in the bar.
"It is a freak. It touched my ass. It thinks I didn't notice but I did. Then it OD'ed on G-virus and went to pieces! It was gross," she vented.
"Right. That's it, I'm going to blast it," Nemesis vowed, picking up his weapon.
"No!" cried Rachael. "Don't do that! It can control metal! It might fire it back on you or something. We need to think about this."
Nemesis tapped his huge mutated fingers on the desk as he thought, "We need more information about it. I know."
He called down to the cashier in the casino and asked, "That metal thing over by the slot machines with the fishbowl on its head, can you go over to it and ask for some ID? I need to Google it."
"It said it's a Mongsoon with Wings in Construction."
"Thanks."
Nemesis tapped this into Google and after correcting the mistake managed to find some information: annoying, frustrating, powerful, throws helicopters, hard. This concerned him. One could not simply blast him with an RPG. Maybe he should speak to someone… who did he work for again? Winds of Destruction… Nemesis figured the cyborg must have had one hell of an ego to announce where he worked and then go on to cause mayhem. Either that or he was stupid.
Nemesis made a few calls and soon he was through to none other than Senator Steven Armstrong.
"Hello. I wonder if you could help me. I've got one of your Monsoons on board my ship and it's been causing a lot of trouble."
"Oh really? Well I'll cause a lot of trouble for that pansy when he gets back," Armstrong was not impressed. Monsoon had called in sick! What was he doing on a ship?
"His behaviour violates Umbrella policy you see. I was wondering if you had any tips for dealing with him?"
"As a matter of fact I do…"
Monsoon continued to play the slots, genuinely now just for fun, blissfully unaware of the approaching danger. He was starting to enjoy himself now! Plus he had loads of money that he planned to treat Alexia with. She wanted to be worshipped like a queen and he was all too happy to do that. Suddenly, all his fantasies were shattered when he heard a dark, menacing growl of not 'Stars' but:
"Desperado."
That voice could only belong to one person… Nemesis! Monsoon laughed, feeling cocky and full of himself because he'd won on the slots. Nemesis – that weakling? Ha! That rocket launcher he carried, he would dismantle that and throw it in his face and his punches would be easy to dodge if he came apart. He wouldn't even need his Sais. It was almost too easy. However he didn't bank on the inside knowledge Nemesis had, which taught him of his weakness…
The trudging footsteps came closer to him and Nemesis let out a bellowing roar, ruffling his hair a bit. Monsoon turned and flashed him his trademark arrogant smug grin, "What?"
"Why are you picking on my little honeypot Jill?" Nemesis shouted in his face.
That was a dumb question. Monsoon was done being polite to these mutated freaks when they would not extend him the same courtesy. He sneered back, "Wind blows, rain falls and the strong prey upon the weak!"
"What kind of bullshit answer is that? Don't try to confuse me with your cyborg waffle!"
Nemesis attempted to grab him but when this didn't work he reached into his pocket and pulled out…no… could it be? AN EMP GRENADE!
"No… Stop it!" Monsoon squealed and raised his arms in defence but it did nothing.
Nemesis pummelled him with three grenades just to make sure then landed him a tremendous blow to the head. Monsoon yelped as his body began to shatter and his vision became distorted and snowy with the message:
Error.
Erorr. Meme.
Errorrrr.
Eeeewheeleerr
E.
Darkness took him. The darkness being an angry Nemesis stuffing all his pieces into a potato sack and marching off to the depths of the ship…
When he came to, he felt bleary and disorientated. Three EMP's in one go? Was that really necessary? They had given him a very bad headache and he had no clue about how long he had been unconscious. And where the hell was he? There was a huge flag hanging on the wall in front of him with some weird symbol of a dog and the word Veltro on in, whatever that meant. No time to wonder about such petty things, not once he realised what a terrible mess he was in!
He was strapped to a wooden chair with gaffer tape and his entire body was… no... those monsters from Umbrella… They had stuck him back together the wrong way around! His kneecaps were where his elbows should be and his leg and arm had been swapped. His other leg was where it should be but facing the wrong way round. His only limb that was in the right place was his left arm but there was a piece missing out of it. The worst part about this travesty was that there was nothing he could do about it! He was totally covered in gaffer tape!
He squirmed trying desperately to break free but to no avail. There was nobody in the room with him but a huge CCTV camera was pointed right at him. Monsoon glared at it in defiance and summoned all his power to blow it up. How dare they! Now to get out of this prison and off the ship; he was so sick of all the nonsense that he was willing to swim the rest of the way. It was utterly ridiculous. With all his raging thoughts, he regained his strength and was able to summon his Sais, which were placed on a table a few feet away, and tear his way out of his gaffer tape prison and reassemble himself correctly, only his left arm was shorter than his right because of the piece missing. Where it had gone remained a mystery. It was too far away to even magnetise back. He was annoyed at having to peel the bits of gaffer tape off his body parts too. To think they could stop him with such pathetic tools; they had no idea of the power he had. BOW's were not known for their intelligence. If they thought he was causing trouble by fiddling a measly slot machine then what would they think of the hell he could really unleash?
He sensed the ship had stopped moving. Had they arrived at Rockfort Island? He hoped so. If only he had just taken his own transport, his Modded Metal Gear Ray but Armstrong would have surely noticed it was missing and questioned his sick day.
He removed the padlock on the door with ease, again chuckling to himself at Nemesis' lack of intelligence. EMP grenades… cheap tricks, he thought. Stereotyping wildly though, BOW's were dumb; it simply was the way things were.
As he headed down the corridor, Nemesis appeared, blocking his way.
"Where do you think you're going cyborg?" he asked, sternly looking down at Monsoon, who was tall but nothing in comparison to him. He raised his hand and began sprouting his tentacles, preparing to make him OD again on his own personal brand of virus.
"Come on… Hit me!" Monsoon taunted him, doing his tornado move and firing one of his kneecaps at him at full force.
Not only was Nemesis bewildered at the metallic piece pounding him in the forehead but he was horrified and sickened by Monsoon disassembling himself in such a way. Sickened enough to gasp and stagger back so the fully-charged, angry cyborg could whiz past him and hastily get to land. If it meant leaving a part of his arm behind then it was a sacrifice he would have to make. Again, even though regrettable, it was just the way things had to be. Luckily, he had a spare body back at World Marshall. He hoped Alexia would still find him attractive with one arm longer than the other.
Nemesis stomped his foot in complete and utter rage as he paced the staffroom of the Queen Zenobia. Never before had he been so mad! That damn robotic monstrosity! The ego on it was unlike anything he had ever seen, of all the video game characters in all the land. Who in their right mind would have the nerve to taunt and mock the Nemesis? Who was he anyway? All he had was one short chapter and a bit of DLC to his name, Nemesis had an entire game named after him! He was a legend! The fact that Monsoon had gotten away and made a mockery of him had really gotten under his lumpy, slimy deformed skin. And to pick on Jill - the object of his desire, his one true love, his obsession… well that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
"Calm down babe, I don't like it when you get mad," Jill pleaded with him.
"I won't have it! Nobody makes a fool out of me and hurts you, especially not a weirdo, hippy, glitching cyborg with no eyes! I am going to crush him," Nemesis fumed.
He altered his main target: Monsoon. Objective: Annihilate!
"Desperado," he growled.
Monsoon took in his new surroundings and drew a deep breath, so happy to be off that wretched ship. In the distance at the peak of a hill, stood the majestic Ashford castle. He smiled lustfully as his magnets gave a slight buzz. He could almost taste Alexia's sweet mutation. Once she was in his arms, all the anger and sorrow he had endured on the Queen Zenobia would be washed away.
Meanwhile, Alexia Ashford was skipping around her bedroom in her castle joyfully singing to herself. She could hardly contain her excitement over going on her first date with the lovely Monsoon. She had endured relations with many a BOW: Ustanak, Tyrant, William Birkin, Albert Wesker, her brother, even Nemesis… Yet none of them satisfied her hunger for something different… Cyborg. Like Monsoon, she had kept her fetish a secret. She was so happy when he had contacted her online and on looking at his Facebook profile, found they had so much in common. They were both annoying, difficult, frustrating, hard to S rank yet also intelligent, arrogant, obsessive, enjoyed waffling about their beliefs, hated the rest of the world and could do freakish things with their bodies that defied all logic. They were so different yet so alike… a paradox. How beautiful… exquisite even. She wanted to make love to him so bad. The sex they would have would be… unique, unduplicated by any other couple in the universe. Oh god…
She sprayed herself in pheromone perfume, brushed her hair and applied her make-up while her servants carried out her orders in setting things up for the game she had in store for him.
Although it was nowhere near as much of an ordeal as the boat trip, Monsoon's short journey to the castle did not run smoothly. Every now and then he would feel a strange sensation in his missing piece of arm that would send an odd surge through his body and temporarily paralyse him for a few moments. It was nothing as bad as an EMP grenade to the face yet still uncomfortable. Plus, he had to stop to vomit on the way, which was also unnerving as technically he did not have a stomach. What also bothered him was that there seemed to be some kind of thing in what he brought up, a weevil type creature… He hoped it was just a side effect of the seasickness and that there was not something seriously wrong with him. If he happened to throw up a weevil in front of Armstrong, the consequences would be dire.
"Please don't let me be diseased," he prayed to nobody because religion was a joke. "I'm not like the rest of this world… I'm unique and downright amazing. I can't die."
It seemed his prayers were answered and the sickness passed. He hopped along the walls up the hill passing by the faff in the training facility by leaping over the roof. Finally, the castle was near. With every jump he took, his glow grew brighter and his smile wider.
Before he knocked the front door, he gave himself a quick polish, brushed his hair and checked everything was in order. It was, aside from the missing piece of arm, which maybe he deserved after cheating Jill twice. It was nature running its course. He was fine without it anyway. It didn't stop him feeling nervous though.
On tapping on the wooden door, he was greeted by a hunter dressed as a butler who said, "Ah… Cordial greetings Mr. Monsoon, the queen has been expecting you. Do come in."
"Just Monsoon is fine, thank you," he smiled feeling grateful that the mutations here were not as ignorant and vile as the ones on the Queen Zenobia. Things were looking up.
The butler led him to a magnificent dining room set up by candlelight where his date awaited. Monsoon was awestruck. Her unmatched beauty rendered him totally speechless. Despite her Facebook pictures being stunning, they did not do her justice. He still could hardly believe how lucky he was to be here. The horrible journey had been worth it for this moment alone.
"Hello my dear," Alexia beamed, obviously she was equally as pleased to see him.
She got up from her chair to embrace him in a welcoming hug and kiss him on the cheek. Monsoon buzzed and wrapped his arms around her, inhaling her sweet perfume. She was wearing a long purple dress so he would have to wait to touch her flesh. He couldn't wait to get her naked in bed.
The meal was gorgeous. Alexia had done her research on cyborg food and Monsoon was delighted to be served with Nanopaste and Electrolytes! How thoughtful of her. They held hands over the table and chatted about memes, bioweapons, magnetics and ants.
"How many retries do you take to S rank on very hard?" Alexia asked, affectionately stroking his hand.
"I know of someone who used hundreds," Monsoon answered, a slight smirk appearing on his face. "I'm the hardest, most frustrating boss in the game."
"Me too," she giggled back at him. "I'm almost impossible to hit with a linear launcher. Hehe. Think of the power we would have if we teamed up. Imagine how infuriating we would be! We could have world domination."
She winked playfully at him and he felt a slimy tentacle rub his foot under the table. He gave her a cheeky smile, "Oh, you wanna play footsies do you?"
Removing his hand he sent it underneath and naughtily up her dress to caress her thighs. Hopefully she wouldn't freak out or think that he was being too forward but he wasn't going to waste time; she should know what his intentions were.
Alexia loved it. He was vibrating ever so slightly and gave off a soft yet electrifying tingle. She was intrigued by what else he could do.
"How does that feel?" he smiled seductively giving her leg a little squeeze.
"Oh, it's amazing," she gasped. "I am so intrigued by your abilities. You are a magnificent specimen."
"Thank you," Monsoon blushed. "Shall we go upstairs and I can show you nature's law?"
Alexia's face lit up, "Yes, I'd like that very much."
She took him upstairs into a secret attic that was full of toys and had a carousel in the middle of it. Cute, he thought. They lay on the floor gazing longingly at each other. Alexia couldn't keep her hands off him, drawn by his magnetism. With every stroke of his chest his purple glow grew stronger.
"It's cool that you're in touch with nature but there's nothing natural about you," she said.
"I know. I'm a paradox. Nothing about me makes sense," he said, a smug tone in his voice.
"I like that. There are things about me that don't make sense too. There's this thing with my brother but I'll explain that another time…"
"Leave the past where it is. I have no interest in whatever you and your brother got up to. We have both committed terrible crimes but needs must in this cruel, diseased world. Tonight is about us and the pleasure we can give each other. Tomorrow we can kill, or we might be killed."
"Oh Monsoon you say the sweetest things. Can I ask you a question?" she giggled nervously and her cheeks heated up.
"Ask me anything your heart desires my love."
"Erm… would you mind if I… umm… touched your dome?"
Yes! He thought she would never ask. His smile widened as he took hold of her wrists and guided her to his primary erogenous zone on his head. As soon as her palms touched him, he gave her a pleasurable electric jolt. She looked at him with eyes brimming with passion and lust and climbed onto his lap so she could get a better grip on his dome, circling her thumbs to massage him and gently stroking him with her fingertips. He felt so aroused that his purple neon glow intensified enough to light up the entire room creating a romantic soft lighting effect. They shared a passionate kiss, adhering to their pasts when they were both human. Alexia ran her hands down his back and settled them on his Sais, her curiosity spiking.
"Can you show me?" she asked.
Monsoon happily obliged and performed some of his tricks with Distopia, teasingly twiddling her hair around it.
"How amusing," she giggled then asked enthusiastically. "Can I have a go?"
Begrudgingly, Monsoon parted with one of his Sai, warning to be careful with it so she would not hurt herself or the Sai. Alexia simply laughed and used her own powers to enchant it with fire, creating a beautiful improved weapon entwined with dancing purple flames. There was no doubt about it, Monsoon was falling in love.
"Definitely exquisite," he gasped.
Alexia kissed him again. Monsoon kissed back while running his fingers through her hair and using his abilities to unbutton her dress. It was about time she showed him some of that beautiful virus addled skin. He took charge, demonstrating how bossy and dominating he could be, and lay her back on the floor to straddle her.
"You're mine," he said licking his lips.
He teased her, running his tongue along her neck and caressing her breasts. Alexia moaned gratefully in ecstasy, enjoying the foreplay. She lifted her leg up and lovingly rubbed her foot against the side of his head. For both of them, it felt like paradise. Monsoon felt her body heat up. Oh god… was she? Yes! She was starting to mutate!
He gazed in fascination and euphoric wonder as her dress became engulfed in flames before his eyes and her skin transformed into her true form… The sheer magnitude of his arousal was almost shameful. No cyborg could thrill him like this. It was like a dream come true.
"You… you are beautiful," he whispered, so enthralled by her that he could barely speak.
Alexia looked at him expectantly and commanded him, "Serve me, my sexy specimen."
Monsoon obeyed. He liked it that she was ordering him around and giving him a taste of his own medicine. Like him, she was no pushover and fiery in more ways than one. He ran his tongue down the middle of her body, sucking and kissing as he went while placing his hands on her breasts and giving her a warm, sensational vibration. His face between her thighs, he prepared to feast on her. Only in his wildest fantasies had he done this, never, ever had he imagined that he would be doing it for real with such a stunning and powerful BOW. He was in heaven. He flicked his tongue on her, enjoying her taste as she was pleased by him.
However as his love muscle burrowed in deeper he felt something nip him so he looked down and saw an ant crawl out of her moist love pot! He leapt back, not because of the ant (that didn't bother him) but because he could feel something in his throat. No… was he going to be sick again?
"What's wrong my sweet cyborg?" Alexia asked sounding alarmed.
He spluttered clamping his hand over his mouth but it did nothing to contain the spew that came out and splattered over her leg. Mortified, he apologised repeatedly but all Alexia could do was smile seductively… did she actually like it? Surely no species could get turned on by being vomited on? He looked down and to his surprise, saw that he had thrown up another weevil only this time, it was made of metal and giving off the same purple magnetic aura that he was! He watched, stunned, as it scurried up her inner thigh and entered her.
She let out a cry of pleasure, "Oh Monsoon that feels so good!"
"Do you like it?" he asked.
"Yes!" she squealed.
He grinned at her, making out that he meant to do it. She sat up and began caressing his dome with her tentacle, exciting him very much. It wouldn't be long before he climaxed. Alexia sensed this and intensified her actions, pressing her body against his, savouring the gentle hum and vibration he gave her… It was hard to know who was getting the most pleasure! Monsoon guided her to the sweet spot on his dome as their lips locked together again. The sensation of her scales against his head was pure paradise and unable to contain himself any longer, he moaned and unleashed oil all over her, before falling to pieces in ecstasy.
"Oh Monsoon," Alexia sighed dreamily as she lay down beside his disassembled parts. "That was amazing. I think I'm in love with you."
Monsoon tenderly stroked her hair with his detached hand, feeling so relaxed in her company that he didn't need to put himself back together, "I love you too, my queen."
He leaned in for a kiss but their beautiful moment was shattered by a loud hammering on the door. A distinct growl could be heard with the undisputed utter of, "Desperado."
Monsoon hastily reassembled himself and drew Distopia, now on red alert. There was no mistaking that voice… Nemesis. That stubborn freak was still after him! He had to admire his persistence…
"Calm down my love," Alexia attempted to reassure him. "He'll never get you. My men will stop him. Come back here and hold me."
Anxiously, Monsoon lay back down but kept one hand on his Sai, just in case.
"I would very much like you to come to Denver with me," he said, clutching her hand, sensing that his time on Rockfort Island was running out.
Nemesis' thuds on the door grew louder and were answered by Alexia's butler. Sure enough, the noise ceased and Nemesis seemed to retreat… Monsoon breathed a sigh of relief. Not that he couldn't fight him off… he just did not want his time with his beloved Alexia interrupted. He began to recharge himself in preparation for round two, when there was a tremendous crash from above.
Nemesis!
The great beast came thundering through the skylight and landed next to them, his presence shattering their warm embrace.
"Desperado," he growled, glaring menacingly at Monsoon.
Monsoon stood to attention and whipped out both Sais, ready to fight.
"Don't even think about it cyborg!" yelled Nemesis and took out an EMP grenade as a warning.
Monsoon hesitated then lowered his weapon, hoping they could negotiate a truce. At that moment he felt the missing piece of his arm tingle… it must have been close! Nemesis smirked at him and pulled out the piece of metal from his pocket.
"Here, you left this on my ship!" he bellowed hurling it back at him.
"Erm… thank you I guess," Monsoon answered sticking it back in its rightful place.
He should have known all would not be as it seemed. As soon as it was reattached, he felt a sudden pang of hunger for flesh… He looked at his newly acquired arm and to his horror found that he had sprouted an eye!
"What have you done to me?" he yelled.
"You're infected on a massive level," Nemesis said smugly. "There's no cure for you now."
With every breath, he could feel his powers slipping away from him as the infection spread from his arm to every inch of his body. His purple glow was diminished. He fell to his knees in despair and annoyance that he had been thwarted by something as stupid as a Nemesis. A stinging sensation came over his back as the beginnings of tentacles began to sprout. The letters on his shoulder no longer spelled 'Desperado' but… 'UMBRELLA'!
"No! Nemesis how could you do something so horrid?" Alexia cried despairingly wrapping her arms around the distraught Monsoon.
"Shut up Alexia, what are you doing with it anyway?" Nemesis shot back. "Eurgh gross… is that oil on you? You actually had sex with it? You'll catch glitch for sure now."
"He doesn't have glitch! He's a real gentleman and he's amazing in bed!"
Monsoon took a little comfort in hearing his lady defend him but Nemesis' response made his blood run cold.
"Well I bet he didn't make you moan in bed the way I did last night. That threesome we had… man that was good."
He turned and glared at Alexia who did nothing to deny it. He brushed her arms off him and pushed her away. The past was the past… but last night they had been chatting online and promised themselves exclusive to each other! Alexia had betrayed him! If he had eyes in his head, they would have been filling with tears, although sadly it came as no surprise to him. He was used to heartache.
Nemesis roared triumphantly and took out his rocket launcher.
"Now that you're mutation, I can blast you with this," he said pointing it at his head.
Monsoon feebly attempted to use his powers but the mutation was too strong and had taken over.
"Hmph, do as you please," he said glumly, ready to accept his fate with what little dignity he had left.
As Nemesis was about to pull the trigger, he suddenly had a flashback to just before he boarded the Queen Zenobia… Jill had given him a blue herb! Although he couldn't recall at the time, now he remembered reading online somewhere, blue herbs were used to cure poison! Yes! Reenergised, he swiftly threw a smoke grenade to temporarily blind Nemesis, crushed the blue herb in his palm and snorted it. Within seconds, his tentacles dropped off and the eye on his arm withered away. By the time the smoke cleared, his glow had returned and he was fully charged and seething with rage!
"You're dead," he snarled at Nemesis as he blew up the rocket launcher then launched a full scale attack with Distopia.
Alexia watched in awe as he pummelled him until he lay unconscious on the ground. Nemesis never stood a chance. Monsoon stood proudly over his triumph with his smug grin all over his face.
"Oh baby you're so strong," Alexia gasped. "Come back here and make love to me again."
Monsoon looked at her in disgust. He had no interest in her anymore, he'd had his way with her and she was a filthy cheat anyway. His lust for mutation satisfied, he came to the conclusion that she was not worth his life. Nemesis had almost killed him; he had to look out for himself. He would have to try and learn to love cyborgs!
"I'm sorry," he said regretfully to her. "But it's back to the earth for you."
She began to protest that Nemesis meant nothing to her and it had been a mistake but it was too late. He threw a smoke grenade at her so she would not be able to follow him and disappeared, leaving her sobbing and broken hearted. He couldn't wait to get home and be back in his apartment!
Before he even got to the port, he was confronted by something he did not expect to see… Metal Gear Excelsus! Nevertheless, he was more than happy to jump in. The consequences of Armstrong were the lesser of two evils; he'd just have to take his punishment for pulling a sickie.
"Pansy," Armstrong grunted at him. "I am disappointed in you Monsoon. I did not know you were into such disgusting things..."
"It was a mistake, I should not have tried to fight nature, I let myself down," he answered glumly hanging his head in shame.
"Damn straight. I hope she was worth it. You know I can't let you go unpunished."
Monsoon shrugged; whatever punishment he had lined up for him would be nothing compared to what he had already been through. But of course, Armstrong was one step ahead and called upon his new found friend who he had picked up along the way… none other than Nemesis!
NO!
"Desperado," he grinned, launching an EMP grenade at him.
Armstrong appeared smug and handed out a cigar to Nemesis as Monsoon shattered into pieces.
"Fancy a game of football?" he asked picking up his head.
Nine months later…
"Congratulations Alexia! You have a...a… oh god what is that!"
Alexia held her newborn baby girl in her arms as she gazed adoringly up at her with a grin clearly inherited from her father and burning red eyes from her. She had silver hair, scales, tentacles stumps of wings and her limbs were in segments… was she magnetised and able to come apart too? Alexia looked down at the abomination, a splice between cyborg and T-Veronica virus that would grow and have unimaginable powers… With her and Monsoon as parents, how would she be anything else?