"Tell me what you're thinking."
"I'm thinking that I won't ever be good enough for him. I'm thinking that one of these days, he's going to leave me, and that will be the thing to finally do me in. I'm thinking that I can't live without him because life with him is all I know. I would take a hundred fights with him over one day without him, but he doesn't feel the same. He loves another woman. He wants to spend the rest of his life with another woman, and the thought of not waking up next to him every day for the rest of my life is terrifying."
"Mellie, you cannot stay in a toxic environment like that. You need to remind yourself that you deserve more. You deserve more than a man that comes in at four in the morning after he's been with her. You deserve someone that is going to love you as much as you love them. You need someone that is going to treat you like the queen that you are. We all have that person that will always have a piece of our heart, but they are not with whom we spend our lives."
"I can't just walk away from him and move on; we have kids together and a life that we have spent the last twenty years building."
"And most of what you have built is distrust and hatred. Tell me how that is healthy. Enlighten me, Mellie. I'm trying my best to now bitch slap the shit out of you because I know you're hurting, but I need you to see some damn sense. You are a brilliant woman, but when it comes to Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III, you are the biggest damn fool I have ever met. I flew here because I knew you needed someone to be there for you, so I'm here. I will sit and listen to your thoughts and feelings, but I will not listen to you saying you aren't good enough for him. You haven't said it yet this time, but I know you're thinking it. Yes, he fell in love with another woman, but that is not on you."
"I just miss him. I miss the way things used to be. I don't even remember what it feels like to be wanted and needed; to be loved."
"Mellie, you need to learn how to love yourself because if you can't love yourself, how the hell are you ever going to be able to love anyone else? You need to learn to love yourself through the pain."
"Why are you right all the damn time?"
"I'm your best friend; I know you."
Mellie sat in her office replaying the conversation that she had with her best friend, Taylor, the week before. Taylor hopped on a plane and flew to Mellie's rescue as usual. Mellie downed the rest of the hooch she had inside her glass. Pearls in hand, Mellie finally had the courage to do what she should have done a long time ago.
The walk to his office felt like it went in slow motion. Mellie watched everyone continue on with their lives as she felt hers coming to a halt. Mellie gripped the folder in her hand tighter as she made her way through the halls of the White House. Lauren smiled up at her as she approached, and nodded her head silently letting Mellie know that Fitz wasn't busy. Mellie stopped, took a deep breath, and turned the door handle.
"Do you need something?" Fitz asked without looking up as Mellie approached. Mellie wordlessly put the folder down on his desk.
"What is this?" Fitz asked as he opened the folder. His eyes got big when he saw what they were.
"I'm divorcing you," Mellie got out the words without falling apart, and she was proud of herself. Before he could say anything and before Mellie broke down, she quickly left his office.
Mellie felt her heart shattering, but at the same time she felt a lightness that she hadn't felt in years. She made her way to the residence and began to pack. Teddy sat on the floor in her room watching her pack. He was singing to himself until he suddenly shot up and ran to the door. Mellie turned to see Fitz standing in the doorway.
"Teddy bear, can you go play in your room for a little bit?" Mellie asked, and the little boy hurried out.
"Don't do this."
"Don't do what? Take care of myself and do what's best for me for once?" Fitz walked over and sat on the edge of their bed. He put his head in his hands, and neither of them said a word. Mellie went back to packing, and Fitz got up and started taking her things out of her suitcase.
"Fitzgerald, what are you doing?"
"You aren't going anywhere."
"You're kidding me, right? I'm giving you what you want. You can now screw Olivia Pope whenever you damn well please, and I won't be around to make it difficult for you two. I am going to go live my own life without you in it, and I am going to be happy," Mellie turned to see Fitz was right in front of her. Before she could say a word, he grabbed her face and kissed her. Mellie took a step back and smacked him.
"I deserved that," Fitz chuckled.
"You're damn right you did. What the hell, Fitz? Why are you doing this?"
"As you once told me, there will be no divorce, honey."
"Are you drunk? Did Olivia leave you?"
"No and no. Mellie, I never knew what I wanted until you said you were leaving. I can't lose you. You've stood by my side through everything, and I have never appreciated you the way you deserve. I want us to try. Let's start over. Please."
"Fitzgerald, don't you dare do this to me again. I can't do this anymore. This, what we have, is an endless, life-sucking cycle. You leave me, screw Olivia, plan a life with her, she gets scared and runs, you come back to me, and I take you back every single time. Then it repeats. I have suffered enough. I am done being at war with myself over you. I need my life back! I need me back! My life has been so consumed with Fitzgerald Thomas Grant since the day I met you. You are my every thought. My world begins and ends with you, but that has got to end because this is killing me. I lost the person that I was because I got lost in you. I am done. I have to be done. If I stay, it'll surely be the death of me. Fitz, I love you with every piece of me. I always have, and I always will, but this is it," Mellie was sobbing at that point, and tears were streaming down Fitz's face.
"Mels…" Fitz opened his mouth, but no other words came out. She poured out her heart to him, and he couldn't force her to stay when she was begging to be let go.
2 Years Later
"Mellie, you can't be serious? You haven't been back there in two years. Hell, you haven't seen him in two years. Your dress has to be a knockout. You have to show him that you're doing great, and that you don't need him because you're doing incredible without him."
"I still love him, Taylor."
"Semantics," Taylor said waving her hands in the air.
"Hand me the black one," Mellie said gesturing to the black dress on her bed.
"Mel, you have to wear this one. It hugs you in all the right places."
"If I didn't know you so well, I'd think you were hitting on me," Mellie winked at her friend.
"Hey, I tried the girl thing. Men just do it better," Taylor laughed and shrugged.
"Do you think I did the right thing?"
"Care to enlighten me on what you're talking about, darling?"
"With leaving Fitz and divorcing him. Did I do the right thing?"
"Look at yourself in the mirror before you ask me to answer that. You're better than ever. You're finally standing on your own two feet. You don't wake up in the middle of the night crying anymore, and you don't drink yourself into a stupor every night. Don't you dare go back to him, Mellie. You have to go to this party, and you're going to look gorgeous to show him that leaving him was the best thing to ever happen to you. Do you understand me? Fitzgerald is toxic. All men are pure poison, but he is the worst kind."
"You're right."
"I usually am," Taylor smirked.
"What time is Noah going to be here? Can you check my phone?"
"I still can't believe he agreed to this."
"He's one of my closest friends. He wasn't going to say no."
"One of your closest friends that happens to be in love with you," Taylor said as she rolled her eyes.
"He does not."
"Yes he does. Now since I just heard the doorbell, I'm going to assume it's him, so I'll go answer it. Put your heels on and your earrings in and let's go."
Mellie did as she was told. She added more mascara and walked out into the bedroom to grab her purse. She had no clue why she even had this house in D.C. She hardly ever used it. This was only the second time she had ever even attended a party in D.C. since she left Fitz. She took a breath, checked herself once more in the mirror, and went downstairs.
"Mellie, you look beautiful as always. No one will be able to take their eyes off of you," Noah said kissing her cheek.
"You look handsome. All the women will hate me for having the most dashing man in the room with me."
"Enough. You two need to go. Love you both, and I hope you have a great time."
"Taylor, do you have plans tonight?"
"No, but Noah come here." Noah walked over to Taylor, and she stood on her tiptoes to whisper into his ear. "Don't you leave her alone with him for even one second. Understood?" Noah nodded to show that he understood, and he grabbed Mellie's arm to leave.
Once they were in the back of the limo, Mellie turned to give him a glare.
"What?" Noah asked.
"What did she say to you?"
"Nothing of importance, Mel. Let's just have a nice time, okay?"
"Okay," Mellie said hesitantly.
The White House was hosting a party for Emily Rockwell who was running as the Republican presidential candidate next term. Mellie was good friends with her, so when she got the invite, she knew that she needed to attend.
As soon as they walked in, everyone head in the room turned. The former First Lady on the arm of another man at a party being hosted by her ex husband was cause for head turning. Mellie saw him immediately. He had his back turned, but the second everyone grew quiet, he knew it was her so he turned.
Fitz had to keep his composure because she looked exquisite. She was breathtakingly beautiful, and he wasn't the only one in the room to take notice. Then he suddenly noticed that she only had eyes for the man next to her, and Fitz felt like he was going to be sick. He had no idea who the guy was, but he already wanted to deck him in front of everyone. Mellie finally took her eyes off of the guy, and their eyes met across the room. It felt like someone had sent a shock through him. He felt like he could breathe again. She looked away quickly, and she led her date to their table. Fitz watched her, and she was somehow at the same table as him.
Mellie walked over to her table, and she thought she was going to scream out in agony when she saw Fitz's name was at the same table. As Noah held out her chair, Mellie saw Emily come hurrying over.
"Mellie, darling, please don't hate me. I wanted you both to sit with Mark and I. I wouldn't be here without the help of the both of you, so I only thought it was fair that you both sit with me."
"Emily, it's perfectly fine," Mellie stood up to hug her.
"And who is this gorgeous man?" Emily asked nodded towards Noah.
"This is Noah Abbott. "
"The Noah Abbott? As in the cardio surgical god? Even I have heard of him, and I'm a city girl. Mels, you did well. I already approve! I'm Emily, and it is such a pleasure to meet you, Noah!"
"The pleasure is all mine, Emily. Any friend of Mellie's has my vote," Noah flashed Emily a charming smile.
"You are so gorgeous. I hope my husband isn't around to hear me say that, but are you real? Are you photoshopped?"
"Noah, excuse Emily. She has a hard time thinking before she speaks," Mellie said laughing.
"No idea why I would run for president with such an open personality, but here I am," Emily chuckled.
"You're good at what you do," Mellie said rolling her eyes.
"Fitzgerald at six o'clock, Mel," Mellie and Emily immediately turned to Fitz and flashed him bright smiles.
"Mellie, you look beautiful. As do you Emily," Fitz kissed them both on the cheek.
The second his lips touched her cheek, Mellie felt her legs shake. Noah was immediately by her side to hold her up. Mellie quickly turned to him and silently thanked him. He nodded back at her without saying a word.
"Mr. President, it is an honor to meet you. I'm Noah Abbott," Noah said as he shook Fitz's hand.
"Please call me Fitz. Any friend of Mellie's is a friend of mine, especially one as prestigious as yourself. You're quite a gifted surgeon," Noah smirked at the friend comment.
"Mel, would you like a drink?" Noah asked.
"Champagne. Thank you."
"Want to come with me?" Noah asked not wanting to leave her alone. Emily catching on, jumped into the exchange.
"Mellie and I need to catch up! We'll be right here when you get back," Noah nodded his thanks and Emily turned to Mellie.
"Say it. Just say it now. I know you're dying to."
"You're still in love with Fitzgerald."
"There, you got it out."
"Oh, Mel. What's Noah doing here?"
"He's one of my best friends. I needed a date, and he knows everything. He offered to be my shield tonight."
"He's a best friend that's clearly in love with you."
"Why does everyone say that?" Mellie sighed.
"Because he so obviously is, Mellie. He wouldn't be here for you if he wasn't."
Noah came back and handed Mellie the glass of champagne. She downed it instantly. Noah gave her a look, and she shrugged.
"Before you say a word, I'm not the First Lady anymore. I'm not under such a scrutinizing microscope."
"Just be careful, Mel. Want to dance?"
"Of course," Noah led her to the dance floor, and after two songs, Fitz came over. Noah's grip on her tightened.
"Mind if I steal your date for a dance?" Noah looked at Mellie, and she nodded.
"Of course not."
"You look beautiful."
"You already said that."
"Am I not allowed to say it more than once?"
"No."
"Mellie, are you seeing the surgeon?"
"What?"
"Are you dating him?"
"Why does it matter to you?"
"You aren't, are you?"
"No."
"Meet me upstairs in the residence in twenty minutes," Before Mellie could say yes or no, the dance was over, and Fitz was gone.
Mellie walked back to her table like a robot. She grabbed another glass of champagne on the way over. He didn't even let her answer, but that was because he knew she'd be there. She could never say no to him. Mellie had lied to Taylor when she said she hadn't seen him in two years. For the last year, Mellie and Fitz had been flying back and forth on weekends to see each other. They'd spend the weekend in bed and not worry about the outside world. Mellie finally ended it two months ago when he wanted more, but she couldn't give him what he wanted.
Twenty minutes passed, and Mellie told Noah that she was going to the bathroom. She got up and made her way to the residence. She knew he'd be out on the Truman balcony, so she walked through her former bedroom and went out there. He was leaning against the railing looking as handsome as ever. She took a deep breath before she said anything.
"Well, I'm here. What do you want?"