Fair Warning
This is a totally, completely AU thread of one-shots, based around the fact that I think there are about fifty billion hilarious scenes that could have happened if Melody Pond had been saved when she was a baby. This is where those ideas are going to happen.
I'm not sure if that was a warning about AU or about the fact that I'm writing again.
ANYWAY
This is part two of my thanks to my 2000+ readers from last month! And also an apology for not having written them earlier.
I own nothing.
She is five, as far as they can tell. At least, the Doctor says she's five, but she looks like she's two. Time never did pass normally within the TARDIS, and Amy and Rory can't tell what month it is, let alone what day.
Mentally, she's ten.
He said this was normal for time lords. When her human hormones set in, he told them with an entirely innocent look on his face, she would start to age appropriately.
He didn't say when that would happen.
Amy suspects that he just doesn't know, and didn't want to admit it.
When Amy thinks back to the night the Doctor picked them up from their house in Leadworth two months after River had dropped them off, she wants to cry.
He picked them up, landing the TARDIS inside their house, and to his regret, on top of their couch.
She raced down the steps, in something more silky and less…well, just less, and pushed through the door. Rory followed her, but not before grabbing her robe and his sword.
And she didn't see him, at first. He wasn't at the front of the console, or waiting by the door.
She remembers yelling, "DOCTOR!" As loud as she could, frantic for news.
Then she heard the crying. It was quiet, but it was there.
And when Rory asked if it was the Doctor, she shushed him.
Of course it wasn't. She could feel it in her bones, hearing that cry. It wasn't the Doctor.
"Doctor." She said, softly, "Where are you?"
He popped out from behind the console, carrying her daughter. She almost didn't believe it.
"Right here. Melody Pond, say hello to your mum. You remember her, don't you?" He held her out very awkwardly, compared to the expert way he held her.
And as Amy took her, she cried. She cried because there was her daughter, and she thought she'd never, ever see her again. She cried because the Doctor had promised, and here he was, and it was so amazingly perfect.
Later, she cried when the Doctor told them that they could never leave. Told them that the only way to make certain that their daughter was safe was to stay with him, forever, away from their home, their family and their life.
Of course, she didn't cry in front of him, but when she and Rory were alone in their room a day later.
However, watching her daughter grow up and play and learn to love the universe the way she did was worth it. Melody was worth it.
It didn't mean, however, that Amy always approved of the way that the Doctor spoiled Melody. But Melody idealized him, and she couldn't bring herself to say anything against him, either.
But there were some days that she felt like she could make him pay for overstepping his bounds, or for almost getting Melody killed(he insisted that it was safer, no really, he promised).
And the best days were when she could do it and look almost innocent.
"Mummy?" Melody asks, tugging on her mother's arm as Amy was painting a portrait of sunflowers.
"Yes, sweetie?"
"How are babies made?"
Amy knew she shouldn't grin. Couldn't grin if, she wanted this to work out the way she hoped it would.
"Why do you want to know?"
"Cause Daddy won't tell me. And the Doctor mentioned something about different methods of procreation between inter-species, and then I looked up procreation, and asked daddy, cause the book the Doctor gave me only told me that procreation is babies being made."
"Well, there you go."
Melody rolled her eyes, "That's what Daddy said!"
"And?"
"There's gotta be something more."
"Honey, you're not old enough." Amy said softly, adding another stroke, working from her memory.
"You always say that, and then the Doctor always tells me."
"If the Doctor's so clever," Amy didn't look up from her painting, "Go ask him."
Melody glared at her mother for a full minute, just as stubborn as the scot. "Maybe I will." She finally huffed.
"Have fun."
Rory poked his head in a second after, to see his wife grinning from ear to ear.
"She asked you too?"
"Yup."
"What'd you said?" He asked suspiciously.
"Told her to ask the Doctor."
Rory's eyes widened, "That's mean."
"He deserves it. She almost got eaten by a two headed plant, for goodness sake! I need to remind him that she's not River. Not yet." She grinned even wider, "Let's go play darts in the console room, shall we?"
Rory knew better than to cross his wife.
"Doctor," Melody asked, sitting on the swing behind him, "How are babies made?"
He turned around, his face in full panic mode. "What? Why do you want to know that? You're not even five!"
"I am too five."
"You're not even ten!"
"So?" She pouted, her eyes going really wide in an attempt to con him into telling her.
He glanced away, attempting to think of an answer, only to come up with: "Ask your parents."
"They wouldn't tell me."
"Why are you asking me?"
"Because you tell me everything."
"So?" The Doctor replied, unable to battle with a child's sense of logic.
She blinked, and pushed her lip out further. "Please?"
He looked around wildly for Amy and Rory, and when he spotted them, he realized that the TARDIS had turned up the music so that he could talk to Melody without them eavesdropping. "It's very complicated."
"Can't be."
"Why can't it be?" he asked, thrown off track.
"Cause everybody can do it. You said so. You said, 'Every species can procreate—I looked that up, and it means making babies—and there are various methods, all very interesting.' And then Daddy accidentally connected two wires wrong and you had to go fix it."
"Did I?" He squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm sorry, I thought that you were—your mother. You two look very similar. Except for your age. And size." There was something he should notice, it was important. Or interesting. What was…
"But how do you make babies?"
"What's the speech for this? There's got to be one. Oh! That one is very typical." He coughed, "You see Melody Pond, when a mummy and a daddy love each other very much…a baby appears. Usually brought by a stork? Think it's a stork. Could be a flamingo, though I don't see how that would work." Something was different, that was it. There wasn't—
"I was brought by a bird?"
"No! No. Course not that's silly. I brought you to your parents."
"So you made me?"
"No! How would I make you?"
"Then how do babies start?"
Any music! That was it! No music, and Rory kept glancing over, pretending to be absorbed in the game. "I'll tell you how babies don't start, Melody Pond! Babies DON'T START WHEN THE TARDIS IS IN THE TIME VORTEX!" He shouted, making sure that the eavesdropping parents can hear him.
The only response was from Amy, her dart hitting the board bull's-eye with a loud 'Thwock' and deadly aim.
Hope you liked this one! Please review!