Simply put, he and I would often embrace each other, heart to heart and without words understand each other's feelings, taking in their breath, their smell, only touch would give away our thoughts. In detail, he would drape his arms under mine, and hold me around my waist while he pressed his nose and lips into my hair, inhale, and then tell me just how beautiful I was. He would dig his fingers into my skin as he nuzzled his nose along my neck and jaw, he would smile when my hands moved into his soft mop of dark brown hair, playing with the locks. Then he would tell me that he loved me, looking into my eyes before he kissed me. He would tell me this after I came home from work, right before we made dinner together, and I would love every bit of it.
One night, however, he and I had argued until our voices were screaming and our bones were rattling, hearts aching and pounding in our chests, until we were cracking at our foundations; tearing down our walls that we built together and shooting each other with hurtful words and hate as fuel. We threw things and wrestled, throwing kicks and punches and spitting words that came from the very depths of what made a terrible person so terrible, we hurt each other until our voices cracked and trembled and tears fell, until our throats were dry and hoarse and eventually, we could speak no more.
That night I furiously glared at him as if he were threatening to kill my family, and without a word I stormed into our room, grabbed my worn black duffel bag, ripped it open and threw whatever clothes I thought I might need into it. I was vaguely aware of him on the couch, and I ran to grab whatever hygienic objects in our bathroom that were mine. I only stopped in my rage once, looking down upon his blank face, and right then I made the decision to get out.
I left him there for two nights without interaction, seeking to stay in my friends house. When I knocked in the way I was accustomed, a very tired looking and annoyed Christina opened the door. For the first time since I've known her, she didn't ask questions about the duffel bag, or about my messy hair, or about the bruises that had begun to surface on my pale skin. Instead of demanding to know who caused my flushed red face and the tears that had rolled down my cheeks, she pulled me inside with the gentlest of hands. Instead she introduced me to her couch, a warm cup of sleepy time tea and honey, and popped in a movie she and I had seen too many times.
She did her best to hold herself back, resisting her easy reading stare and direct questions. I was thankful. I did notice a tall and lean blonde figure standing in a bedroom doorway, looking very tired, and that caused me to wonder why Christina hadn't told me she moved in with Will. We'd been friends for two years and I couldn't understand why she'd neglected me. Those thoughts were quickly chased away when she rose to her feet and began explaining why I was there, and it was somewhere around 3 a.m. that it was a settled agreement; that I'd stay there for the time being, though they hadn't a clue what got me there.
I struggled to sleep in the cold lonely dark of their apartment due to the thoughts in my mind, fighting with the words he and I had exchanged, working my brain with scalding steam against doubts of us and of myself. Screaming in the dark reaches of my thoughts and memories, over the idea of officially leaving him. That maybe the fight was his fault as it was the first one of such degree that we had, but my mind was too selfless to believe that he might've done something wrong and the blame shifted onto me by my traitorous brain. I wondered if I wasn't right for him, that I wasn't good enough for him, that he and I were too different or that he wanted something else that no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't give.
It was thoughts like those that made me grow to dislike myself further, and more tears to have surfaced. I fell into a pit of self loathing, and the effects were immediate. As on the second day of my stay Christina had said something to me, around lunch time when I refused to eat even the food she brought up for me. I told her how I felt, and why, and I cried in her arms as she listened. I told her what happened and how clueless I felt, how alone and vulnerable I felt I was becoming. After some careful thought she told me that I might need to take a break, away from Tobias; the thought of that terrified me to no end. He was all I ever had, he was my strength, my barrier, my comfort, and my safety where I could find none. I told her how important he was, and how he had supposedly made me feel. Leaving out the doubt of his real intentions, wonderment of his feelings toward me and if he really wanted all of that. I agreed nevertheless.
Despite myself, and hungry, I wavered and wobbled weakly down the dark corridors of the Dauntless that I loved so. I traveled to the mess hall to which I was sure I would find Tobias. It was supper time now, and I had gone through every scenario in my insecure mind as to what would happen. To my great surprise, because I doubted he'd come down so fast, I found him sitting at our usual table across from Zeke and Uriah. Shauna was next to him and Marlene was just sitting down. I approached cautiously, like one would a hungry and ticked lion. And though he did not look at me, I told him that I was taking a break from him, thinking that a few more days to complete the week was enough. He grunted and offered a nod but didn't smile, didn't say anything, so I left.
It was the next day that I was sitting in my office typing furiously into my computer keyboard, that a knock came to my door. Saving the document I was on and closing it, I called my approval of intrusion. Much to my surprise, Eric entered my workspace cool and leisurely. Still taught and sharp like he was on a string, or something was wedged up his- needless to say, he was very pressed, and his posture gave off an air of superiority. Technically we were of the same level, but his few years of experience gave him a one up to me, and he had no qualms of boasting such stature. Which is why his presence shocked me so. For a few minutes it seemed he stood in front of my desk, tall and imposing with his dark stare and many piercings, until he spoke to me directly, "Stiff," And still I believed this all to be some joke, that he was attempting to tell the air of what he felt, as opposed to speaking to me. Then he looked directly at me, lips frowning and one eyebrow raised, "Who, me?" I asked him, eyes wide as I felt the air cooling the commonly found gloss over my eyes. He snorted, "Yes you, am I talking to that plant?" He gestured dramatically to my flowering fern in the corner. I straightened up, "What did you need, Sir?"
"Sir?" He smirked, a snake slithering over his face before his thin pink lips parted, tugging on his piercing. The thought struck me that he would look rather handsome had he removed at least some of the piercings, but then I was aware that he was playing fun over me. Sharply, more so than I intended I responded, "What did you need?" My eyes caught how he licked his lips quickly before saying, "You have an assignment, to Candor, you're to supervise and direct a small squad of Dauntless soldiers, protecting the interests, assets, and any personal targets that would be related to Jack Kang for two weeks,"
"Two weeks?" I repeated with incredulity,
"You will be right by Kang's side the whole time, as his personal guard," Eric continued, as he stared at me the entire time, which made me fidget in my seat. I nodded to him, in hopes that he would stop with his brooding stares, to which he turned on heel and walked to my office door. He made one comment as he left, "See you later, Stiff." Later that day I spoke with Christina and told her what I was to do, and asked her if she could keep an eye on Tobias and my things for the time that I would be gone. Having her agree was no problem, and it was early the next morning that I left the Dauntless compound, heading for the glass scale of black and white for two weeks.
A few things about this new story, it is a triple shot, the second chapter will be much longer and the last will be moderate. Tell me what you think C: