A fanfic about Tamako and Yuna watching Symphogear and developing a 'determination to fist'. No knowledge of Symphogear is required to understand any of this. Inspired partly by Tamako's Hero outfit looking so much like Hibiki's Symphogear and partly by Yuna fighting primarily by punching things, also like Hibiki. GX wasn't released in time for there to be any Blu-rays out by the time the world fell to the Vertexes, so lets just say that this is an AU where Symphogear G and Symphogear GX came out a year earlier than they did in our universe. Enjoy.

"So boring~!" Tamako complained, rolling over on her bed and glaring at her TV. The weather was terrible so she couldn't engage in her outdoor hobbies, she didn't have any homework to do, Anzu was busy, the others were nowhere to be found and there was nothing interesting on TV. She had Blu-rays and a couple of games, sure, but she'd looked over them all and somehow she just didn't want to watch or play any of them.

"Ugh…" Tamako jumped off the bed and walked around her room restlessly. If there was nothing interesting here then she'd have to find something to do somewhere else. Where could she go? She wasn't squeamish about getting wet or muddy usually, but she'd promised Anzu she wouldn't go out in this 'dreadful weather' in case she caught a 'terrible cold', so she was stuck in the castle for now.

"Lets see…" There was the library, but reading wasn't Tamako's idea of a good time. There was a small recreational room, but since she was by herself it wasn't like she'd be able to play many of the games there, and it wouldn't be that fun without company anyway. "Pah."

Now that she thought about it though, the 'library' was more of a general media room than anything, and she was pretty sure there were Blu-rays and DVDs there. Maybe there'd be something interesting enough to catch her eye. Failing that, she could force herself to check out one of the romance movies that Anzu kept recommending she watch. She had to bite the bullet eventually she supposed.

Tamako headed to the library, hands stuffed in her pockets. Looking around in the (relatively) large room, she honed in on the Blu-rays and started browsing them.

'Huh, this isn't so bad.' To her surprise there were more than a few interesting things on the shelves, including a few foreign movies, which weren't exactly easy to come by these days for obvious reasons. She reached out and picked one up to check the synopsis, then practically dropped it when she read the language options. "Subs only!? If Tama wanted to read she'd pick up a damn book!" she complained.

She winced a second later, remembering where she was. Chancing a glance at the assistant she saw her gritting her teeth, but trying her best to ignore her. Tamako guessed she didn't want to scold one of the revered Heroes. 'Being a Hero has handy perks.' Quietly tip toeing in an exaggerated way, she checked out the rest of the small selection. Finally, just as she was about to give up, a particularly brightly coloured cover caught her eye. To her pleasant surprise, one of the girls costumes looked somewhat similar to her own Hero outfit. "What, did someone make an anime based on us with Tama as the lead? Tama guesses its only natural, she has the best…oh, 2012. …Well whatever. Lets see…'Symphogear' huh? Sounds interesting enough."

Tamako checked out as many volumes as she could, so she didn't have to bother going back and forth fetching discs if she liked the show, and started heading back to her room, shoving them into her rucksack after running back and grabbing it, but as she was on her way back to her room she ran into Yuna. "Oh hey Yuna, cruddy weather huh? Say, are you doing anything now? Tama's really bored so she checked out some Blu-rays, you want to watch them with her?"

"Hm? I was going to go and work out, buuuut…okay, why not? We've been training hard just lately, so I kind of want a break."

The two went to Tamako's room and started watching, and within two episodes they were hooked.

"Wow, Hibiki is so cool! I wish I could do that with my punches!"

"Your punches are plenty strong. Tama's jealous though, she has a costume like Tama's but she fights like you and acts kind of like a hot blooded version of you to boot. Tama wanted to be the cool hero!"

"But you're an actual real life Hero," Yuna pointed out.

"…Yeah, well, Tama wants to be an anime character as well!"

"Maybe someone will make an anime about our fights in a few years, that'd be pretty cool right?"

"Tama guesses. …Wow, those are some big guns. And big honkers as well."

"I'll say…"

"Oh man that was intense…next disc, next disc…here it is!"

"Great, lets…wow, you're not going to watch all of that in one go are you?" Yuna said, looking at the huge pile of Blu-rays Tamako had shoved down next to her bed.

"Nah, Tama just didn't want to keep making trips." Tamako had decided to snag every volume that was in the library.

"Ooh, that's a lot of volumes. What's this say…'believe in justice and hold a determination to fist'? Wow, cool! I want to believe in justice and hold a determination to fist as well!"

"Don't you already?"

"I gueeeess…but it sounds way cooler when I say it like this! I should start saying fisting instead of punching, it sounds snappier anyway!"

"Yeah, Tama guesses it does," Tamako agreed.

Three hours later, they'd finished the first season.

"Wooooow, that was so cool!"

"Damn right! Tama's all hyped up now! You wanna watch the next season?"

"Mmm…I kind of want to, but look how long we've been watching already," Yuna said, looking at the clock meaningfully. "Might as well save it for later now."

"Oh man, is that the time? Tama completely lost track. Guess we shouldn't binge on it all at once."

"But you know, I feel pretty pumped up after watching that. Do you want to go and spar?"

"Hell yeah, Tama hasn't had anywhere near enough fisting yet! Show me what you're made of!"

"Eh, you think fisting sounds better too? I'm gonna use it instead of punching from now on for sure, its got more force behind it! Hey, do you want me to teach you how to fist a little? I mean, your yo-yo's awesome, but its best to be trained in all sorts of things, right? We all have some martial arts training, but fisting is my specialty, so I can give you a few pointers!"

"Sure, why not? Tama's a yo-yo expert at this point, so she could do with getting some hand to hand skills in, just in case."

"Great, lets go! The weathers cleared up so we can do it outside, I could do with some fresh air."

The two headed off to spar, but as they headed towards their destination they ran into Anzu.

"Good evening Tammachi-senpai, Yuna-san," she greeted them. "Goodness, I'm so glad its stopped raining at last, it was just frightful for this time of year. Are you two heading out?"

"Yeah, we got all worked up when we were watching some stuff in Tama's room so we're gonna go fist each other," Tamako said.

"…I beg your pardon?"

"Mm, what she said! We watched this Blu-ray and one of the girls on it was great at fisting, so I offered to help Tamako-chan learn how to fist better! She's not bad at it herself, but I'm kind of an expert, you know? I've had a lot of practice after all."

Anzu stared at them with wide eyes. "I-I-I-I-I-"

"What, you've got a stutter now Anzu? That's rough," Tamako said sympathetically. "Don't worry, it'll probably go as quickly as it came. Anyway, we're gonna go do it in the park out front, Tama's sick of doing it indoors all the time. 'Sides, with any luck there'll be people there, and Tama likes having an audience."

"Y-Y-Y-Y-You l-l-l-like people watching you f-f-f-fisting girls?" Anzu stammered, looking as if she was going to pass out.

"Yeah, it really motivates Tama to put some muscle into it! Tama's fisted plenty of people in her time and she always performed at her best when there was a crowd!"

"…You've fisted…lots of people…?" Anzu said faintly.

"Oh yeah, dozens! Tama was a real handful when she was younger, hahahahaha! She was always fisting girls, and some boys too! One time she came across this group of five girls that annoyed her, so she challenged them to a fist off. They fisted Tama plenty hard, but in the end no one can get one over on Tama! Tama fisted them all until they could barely stand and walked away the dominate one!"

"…" Anzu couldn't even move, let alone respond. Her body and mind were paralysed with horror at what she was hearing.

"Wow, you sound like you were a real tearaway! I can't wait to see how well you hold up against me; not to brag but I've fisted hundreds of people over the past few years!"

"Oho, hundreds eh!? Tama'll be the toughest partner you've had yet, just you wait! Your days of being the alpha fister are over! Anyways, we should go and get on with it, we won't have time to put on a good show for everyone if we don't hurry up. Sorry Anzu, Tama'll come hang out with you some other time. You aren't the type of girl Tama wants to fist, with your, uh, 'delicate' body, and you probably wouldn't enjoy watching us going at it either. See you around!"

"Bye An-chan!"

And with that, they ran off to fist each other.

Anzu slumped against the wall in a horrified fugue, eyes staring blankly ahead at nothing. The things she'd just heard…the sheer impropriety…the way they'd just casually started talking about such things in the middle of the hallway…! The way Tamako had announced that she had no interest in Anzu! The way Yuna had bragged about her hundreds of sexual conquests like it was the most normal thing in the world! The notion that people just went along with their fisting as a matter of course, to resolve disputes no less! The way that Tamako had just cheerfully ditched her to go and fist one of their mutual friends in public…!

Anzu slowly slid down against the wall until she was crouched down holding her knees, eyes still uncomprehending of the world around her. She'd never be able to trust anyone again, she was sure. Her romance novels were all lies.

Chikage came out of her room and paused, looking down curiously. Anzu was slumped against the wall, looking more miserable than Chikage had ever seen her. Chikage considered just walking on by and leaving her for Tamako or one of the others to deal with, but she knew that Yuna wouldn't want her to do that. Grimacing, she walked over to the miserable looking girl.

"…What's wrong with you?" she asked bluntly.

Anzu's eyes slowly refocused, and she looked up at Chikage with a blank expression on her face. Silence dragged on between them and Chikage rapidly became uncomfortable.

"…Are you sick? If you are…you should go to the infirmary instead of…hanging around where you can infect other people…"

"…Sick…sick…I'll tell you what's sick!" Anzu shouted, leaping to her feet furiously.

"…!" Chikage jumped before she could stop herself. This was certainly uncharacteristic. "What are you-"

"Tamako! And Yuna! Sick, the both of them!" Anzu shrieked, throwing her arms up in the air dramatically. "Do you know what they're doing!? Do you know what they're doing!? Right now!?"

"…No…?"

"THEY'RE FISTING EACH OTHER! IN PUBLIC!"

It took Chikage several seconds before she realised that she hadn't misheard her. "…Don't be ridiculous," she said flatly. Anzu had clearly gone insane.

"You don't believe me? Oh, that's fine. Believe me, I wouldn't have believed it either, oh no. I wouldn't have believed it for one second, but I heard it straight from them, oh yes! Standing there talking about how they were going to fist each other, bragging about all the people they've fisted over the years…! Ugh! Its so…so…uncouth! No, that's too mild a word! Its just horrid!"

"…There there, I'm sure they'll stop fisting each other soon."

Anzu turned and stared at her with unsettlingly wild eyes. "You still don't believe it, do you? But don't worry, you'll believe me soon, when people start talking about their public display of indecency! When the inevitable footage of their exhibitionism gets uploaded to the internet! Ah, they probably enjoy the thought! Ugh!" Anzu shuddered and rubbed her own arms, then paused, then rushed over to Chikage and grabbed her shoulders.

"You know what this has done though? Its taught me a valuable lesson! Its taught me how naive I've been! The childish notions of romance and chivalry and true love that my romance novels filled my head with, its all lies! Garbage! Do you know what the truth is? The truth is, that we're born into this world alone, we live alone, and we die alone! The bonds we think we form with other people are just delusions which we share to make ourselves feel better about existing in this cold, cruel, unpitying universe! Love is a mutual delusion! A mutual delusion that biology inflicted upon us simply to encourage us to propagate our genes, a mere way of ensuring we keep breeding despite humans being capable of understanding how awful the world around us is! And it doesn't even last! Do you know how high the divorce rate is!? Its stratospheric! Love doesn't endure, no! People get sick of each other as soon as the chemical rush wears off, the only reason so many people stay together is because they've already bred by the time the high wears off! They find themselves trapped with each other for years, festering away in hate, staying simply for their offsprings sake! Well not me, no! I've figured it out in time! I won't be trapped by the illusion of love! Don't you understand Koori-san? Love is a lie! LOVE IS A LIE!" Anzu finished off her monologue by shaking Chikage violently by the shoulders, spittle flying from her mouth.

Chikage grimaced in disgust. "…That's…very interesting. I'll…bear that in mind." Chikage didn't show it outwardly, but she was quite alarmed.

"That's right, bear it in mind! Bear it in mind, lest you get dragged down into the pit trap of love only to with speared by the spikes of reality!"

Chikage looked at the poor, deranged girl pityingly. The stress of fighting must have made her mind snap. "…Okay." She gingerly stepped back away from the girl and slowly walked away, shooting the occasional backwards glance behind her. Anzu had pulled out her phone and was swiping through it furiously, cursing under her breath. Chikage felt relieved when she rounded a corner.

'I should…leave this to Doi to deal with…they're each others responsibilities after all…'

Chikage decided to walk around until Anzu was gone, then go back to her room and play her games in peace, door locked behind her. Whatever drama was going to occur, she wanted no part of it.

As she walked down a flight of stairs, one of the castles staff came into view. A sinking feeling entered her stomach as she recognised him as a person who liked to make small talk. She hoped she'd get away with a simple 'hello' today.
The knot in her stomach tightened as she reached him and he slowed to a stop and started to speak. "Good evening Koori-sama. Aren't you going to go and watch Doi-sama and Takashima-sama fist each other? They're putting on quite a show."

Chikage froze mid-step. She must be hallucinating. There was no way that what she'd just heard could be correct.

"…What did you say…?"

"Those two, Doi-sama and Takashima-sama! They're out front, putting on a real show for everyone. Kept on shouting about how everyone should come and watch them fist each other. Put a notice online too, 'Come watch us fist each other like in an anime' or something. Kids these days," he said, shaking his head. "They'll be reprimanded for this, I'm sure, its reckless to do that sort of thing near a crowd after all, but kids just can't help themselves at that age. Well, I'm sure you understand. Anyhow, I'm running late as is. Good day to you," he said, bowing and walking off, leaving Chikage frozen behind him.

The room seemed to spin around her as the reality of the words that she'd heard two different people say within minutes of each other sank in. Doi…and Yuna…engaging in sexual intercourse! In public!

"…Why…?" It wasn't fair. Yuna should be fisting her, not Doi! …Preferably in private, but she'd take what she could get. Chikage couldn't bear it. She staggered away in a stunned daze, too traumatised to have a clear goal in mind.

"Haaa…haaa…you're not bad at fisting Tamako-chan…but I still have the upper hand…! Take this…!"

Yuna rammed her fist forwards, burying it deep into Tamako's body.

"Guh…! Tch, you act tough, but Tama's not gonna give up so easily!" Tamako returned the favour, jabbing a sweaty fist into Yuna, to the delight of the gathered crowd.

Sweat ran down the two girls bodies as they furiously fisted each other, the crowd cheering them on wildly. Neither of them had never fisted such a worthy opponent before and each was glad for the chance to improve their skills. The crowd was grateful that they had this rare opportunity to see such expert fisters going at each other.

As Yuna trapped Tamako in a crushing leg lock, she fisted her again and again, not letting up even as Tamako grunted and yelped underneath her. Friendly fist off or not, Yuna wasn't about to go easy on her, how would she learn otherwise?

"Ah, urrrgh!" Tamako grunted as she thrashed her body around like a fish in a futile attempt to escape. She quickly realised that she couldn't win against someone so well versed in fisting as Yuna. As much as it wounded her pride to do so, Tamako finally signaled her surrender, to mixed shouts of delight and disappointment from the crowd.

Yuna released her and rolled off of her, panting heavily. The experience had given her a good work out, that was for sure.

Tamako grunted in annoyance, also panting heavily. She couldn't believe she'd been fisted into submission so easily. 'Damn it…Tama'll have to practice fisting until she's on Yuna's level…Tama won't let her stay above her for long!'

Yuna finally caught her breath and stood up, giving a friendly wave to the crowd, to more cheers. She held out her hand to Tamako, who looked at it with an air of disgruntlement before accepting the offer and rising to her feet.

"Hmph! Tama'll beat you next time for sure, just you wait!" she said grumpily. "Good match though. You're good at what you do." Tamako shook Yuna's sweaty hand in a sign of good sportsmanship.

"I'll look forward to it. You're great at fisting considering that you're a ranged fighter, I bet with some more practice you'll be on my level! I haven't had someone fist me so firmly for a while," Yuna said, wiping her sweaty hair away from her eyes.

Thanking the crowd for their encouragement, the two headed back indoors, intending to shower. However…

"What the hell is that noise? …It kind of sounds like Anzu!" Tamako exclaimed. They could hear the hysterical screaming of Anzu mixed with the panicked shouts of other people coming from the rear of the castle. Tamako and Yuna rushed towards the sound, ready to tackle the threat, but they stopped dead as soon as they laid eyes on the sight.

It looked like something from a dystopian movie. On the wet ground was a haphazardly dumped pile of books, which Tamako recognised as Anzu's gigantic romance novel collection. Over by the wall, Chikage was slumped like a puppet that had had its strings cut, blankly horrified expression affixed on her face, not responding to the ruckus at all. Several Taisha members were standing fearfully on the outskirts watching the events unfolding in front of them, helpless to intervene. And there, front and centre, was the source of the drama: Anzu herself, holding a can of gasoline above her head, screaming "Love is a lie! Love is DEAD!"

She'd transformed into her Hero form and the only thing stopping her from pouring the gasoline all over the books was Wakaba, who had wrapped her arms around the enraged girls torso and was trying (and failing) to drag her away, Hinata, who was bravely dangling off of one of her arms, futilely trying to grab onto the can, and several braver members of the Taisha who were also attempting to grab hold of it. It looked for all the world like a game of pass the parcel that had gotten wildly out of control.

Tamako and Yuna gawped at the bizarre sight for several seconds, before Tamako regained her senses.

"Anzu! What the hell are you doing!?" she shouted.

Anzu's head whipped around and she fixed Tamako with a glare so evil that Tamako shrank back. "…DEGENERATES!" she shrieked. "You pair of filthy perverts! You killed love!"

"Wha-?"

"An-chan's flipped!" Yuna exclaimed in distress, hopping from one foot to the other nervously.

Wakaba turned her head and glared at them. "I see you've finally stopped disgracing the reputation of the Heroes with your gross displays of indecency," she said, having been flooded with emails asking why the two of them thought it was appropriate to fist each other in public (although Hinata had had to fill her in on what that actually meant). "Look what you've done to Anzu with your disgraceful behaviour! Come and take responsibility for your actions and help us get her inside! And bring Chikage with you as well!"

Tamako shook her head in complete bafflement as she watched Anzu let out an insane scream and lunge forward, slowly drawing closer to the book pile. She turned to the equally baffled Yuna, who was waving her hand in front of the unresponsive Chikage's face. "Wow…Tama guesses some people just really hate anime."