A/N: Before you continue, please realise that this was something a friend of mine and I wrote a few years ago when we were bored. We were both extremely hyper (or rather I was, my friend was simply tired) and then... this came into creation. This is very much a crack fic. I am not sorry.


I Feel Like A Hippogriff


"And Wayne catches the snitch! Gryffindor wins!" The voice of seventh year Arthur Weasley shouted from the spectator's box at the annual Gryffindor vs. Slytherin Quiditch game. Despite the heavy rain hammering down upon the players, the Gryffindor players still celebrated in the customary fashion, rubbing it truly in the Slytherins faces.

Though amongst the small and petty digs the quiditch team were throwing at the Slytherins there was also several shouts of 'Party up in the common room!'

It seemed this party was going to be different from all the others.

.

Remus Lupin hated parties with a passion; ever since he was a young child he had never liked socializing. In fact the furthest that Remus had ever got to a proper social life was the conversations he read about in books.

Now he was sat awkwardly in between two of the Gryffindor players, who were interrupting his reading of "Quiditch though the ages"; he still didn't understand the game enough to celebrate with the others.

Even though many of the other first, second and third years had gone up to their room for a bit of peace and quiet from the loud music souring through the common room, several of the lower school children remained seated talking to players and friends. Remus was probably the only child reading, which caused him to earn several odd, looks.

He was interrupted again by two older boys, who looked identical in everything but hair style. He knew vaguely of their reputation at the school, Fabian and Gideon Prewett were their names, he recalled.

"You want a chocolate brownie, Mate?" The one with shorter hair – Remus thought he was Gideon asked, with a lopsided grin on his face as his brother held out a plate of brownies on a silver plate. Remus hesitated, he really liked brownies but he wasn't sure whether or not he could trust the Prewett twins.

"Come on mate, it isn't going to kill you, it's just a brownie, the house elves made them special. "The other twin asked, as he pushed the plate onto Remus' lap. Hesitantly, he took one and bit into it. The twins smiled as he nodded his head and hogged the plate of the delicious brownies.

"Enjoy them Mate, we'll talk to you later 'right?" The first twin asked, Remus was still positive that he was Gideon, before the two sixth years walked away from where Remus was sat.

.

An hour later Remus was feeling ecstatic. He felt as if he could run a thousand laps of the quiditch field if he had the chance, and he was literally buzzing with anticipation. He even got up, chucked his book to the side and began dancing with a 7th year girl, who went along with it happily, the whore of Gryffindor tower was her nickname. Remus was engaged with dancing so much that Prewett twins gaped and were speechless for the first time ever.

Remus stopped abruptly, looking around and taking on what was going on in the common room, before picking up his dance moves, dancing by himself instead of with the seventh year.

His body jerked from left to right violently, (much like Blaine in that glee episode when he gets drunk and kisses Rachel... but that doesn't happen until like 2010, and this is 1971 so no copyright can be used against us... ) as he tried and failed to dance.

The two Prewett twins were starting to regret ever giving Remus the brownies, seeing as they had placed muggle drugs inside of them. And the young boy seemed to be affected by them extremely well... maybe too well...

Slowly they walked up to Remus, one of them wearing a smirk on his face and the other a grin, as Gideon shouted over the music,

"Hey kid, you feeling okay?"

Remus turned around gracefully as he put his arms up in a wing like fashion as he shouted in reply,

"I feel like a Hippogriff!"

Gideon laughed, as he watched the first year completely make a fool out of himself, and Fabian, instead of laughing let out a weird snort.

Due to Remus' shout about Hippogriff's, Molly Prewett, Gideon and Fabians older sister let out a sigh of frustration as she stormed over to her brothers.

"What have you paid that poor first year to make a fool out of himself?" She hissed, her eyes glaring holes through her brothers' foreheads.

Fabian looked over at Gideon with a raised eyebrow,

"We haven't paid him anything, in fact we have no idea what you're talking about. How on earth can you accuse of doing something to an 'ickle first year?"

Molly scowled at her brothers, before her eyes widened.

"You didn't – tell me you haven't you immature little... you didn't get a first year stoned did you?!" She hissed, looking at her brothers who had been trying not to smile throughout her accusation.

"Of course we haven't dear sister. Why on earth would you accuse us of such a thing? That is offensive Molly." Gideon continued, too which Fabian gave a quick nod.

"Extremely offensive."

Remus having finished dancing quickly waded through the crowd of people who were drunken messes, as he made his way over to the twins,

"Hey, hey, hey guys, can I have some more brownies," He asked, his golden eyes, looking innocent and carefree for the first time in years. Fabian shook his head, telling Remus that he had had quite enough brownies, and so the werewolf turned to look at Molly, with a smile.

"Such lovely colours" He spoke with a dazed voice before flouncing over to where a red head, dressed in her pyjama's stood, obviously trying to get someone to turn the music down.

"Hey, hey, hey – girl who's in my class but I don't know the name of, um... it's Rose or Lily or something right?" Remus asked as he looked into her emerald green eyes. Lily nodded slightly, probably scared for her life, as she looked at Remus with a blank expression, "Do you see that cabinet? Well it turned into a Hungarian horntail – then told me it was a cabinet, it lied to me..."

Lily looked alarmed at Remus' display of insanity – after all she had thought that the boy had been one of the normal Gryffindor's. She quickly excused herself from the room, and raced up the stairs to her dormitory, where her safety was ensured.

Remus breathed in sharply, he suddenly had a craving for milkshake. He smiled as he quickly turned back to the Prewett twins, and spoke,

"I really feel like a Milkshake, one with those brownies in."