The Grass is Greener on the Other Side

By: Just Rikku

NOTE: Just so you know... this particular fan fic was thought up waaaaaay before Kingdome Hearts II... so the storyline follows... Kingdom Hearts.

Disclaimer: You know what? I don't own anything. Yup, nothing. Not even my soul. Sad, huh? Do not mourn for me. -Sobs- Oh, wait. I own… TOMATOES!!!!!! Mmmmm… Tomatoes good…

Chapter 1: Oh, How the Tide Turns

Walking down the road, I ran into Ansem… Yeah, him. The same one that supposedly had perished… WHY WON'T YOU JUST DIE!!!!??? Anyway, Ansem. He was in a pathetic state: cowering in a street gutter.

"Pathetic." I said as I shook my head, causing the perfection that is my hair to slide into my face.

"You know, you should really get over that phobia of yours." I said with a smirk. Here's my plan:

1)Pretend to feel sorry for that…ahem… guy.

2)Make his life as miserable as possible by surrounding him around that which he hates most.

3)Enjoy every second of it.

Yes, it's an ingenious plan to say the least. It's called Black Indigo Flame 2050 of subtext Alpha/Bravo/November/Golf or BIF2050ABNG. Ok, back to the story.

"Are you going to spend your whole life being afraid of a shrub?" I ask as I pick a leaf from the bush and hold it to his face. "AIIIIIYIIII" he screams as I walk away while laughing. I won't kick him while he's down… or won't I? HAHAHAHAHAHA!

So, at school, yup, me… at school. Hey, look it's Sora. I think… I'll go say hi…

"Hey, Sora."

"Hm?"

"Hello, Sora. I, Riku, have just greeted you."

"Oh, yeah, hi."

You know what? I don't like his tone. So I punched him in the arm, which caused him to step over onto some guy's foot, and he pushed Sora onto some chick. Yeah, his hands landed somewhere… Let's just say that little Sora learned a valuable lesson that morning. But… I was laughing too hard to know what it was…

So, here we are…in homeroom.

The left side of Sora's face was a vivid pink. I'm thinking it matches his personality perfectly. And with no teacher to stop me… I launch a barrage of spitballs at him. Nah, I'm just kidding. Believe it or not… we are best friends. The punching thing actually happened

The principal came bustling in. "Your regular homeroom teacher had… an accident. Here is his permanent replacement." The guy that came in after that had dark skin and silver hair in a ponytail, and… what the…? It's Ansem! I just saw him… in the gutter. (If you don't remember, start over.)

So, here I am, in homeroom, staring at the most…-gags- guy in the multiverse.(Oh, so you assume there is only one… verse… You people and your assumptions… -mumbles incoherently…)

Sora turned to me with the same expression. Although, I'm thinking my hair looks so much better than his.

"Yes, well, it is most… unfortunate that your teacher is… incapacitated."

Oh, I'm hating this already.

The bell rings and everyone filed out into the hallway.

"Maybe he's turned over a new leaf" Sora said while walking to social studies. And that made me think of this morning, which made me have to stifle a laugh.

" Believe me, he's up to something…" I said. As I finished that sentence, Selphie, the only other girl on the island, ran into me.

Seriously there is something wrong with, like everyone on the island. See look at this list that I made.

Selphie: an annoying little girl who gets a new crush every day.

Tidus: a twerp who won't shut-up about how great he is.

Wakka: EWWWW!

Kairi: Oh, I could go on and on about that little-

Sora: he just bugs me… Besides he is going out with that little-

Anyway, she said sorry, but I knew it was on purpose. I say that because she had a shirt that said IN BIG, BOLD LETTERS, "I heart Riku"

"Take that off!"

I said before I actually thought about it. And, yeah, let's just say Sora and I have matching facial marks…We make it to the door of social studies, when that little- I mean, Kairi walks up to us. She slaps Sora on the right side of his face and yells,

"You…PERV! Chelsea told me what you did!" And she stormed off.

"Great. Are you happy?" he muttered.

Actually… yeah. I was. But of course, I said I was sorry.

"I hope she doesn't stay mad…"

Man! Sora is like totally oblivious to the fact that we absolutely hate each other.

So, we enter the classroom, late of course. The teacher, who just so happened to belong to my web forum excused me, but she made Sora stand at the door holding a bucket full of water in each hand. And after about five minutes of standing there with his… limp, noodle arms, I felt sorry for him and bribed the teacher to let him sit down.

"Thanks,"

"You owe me,"

So it started to get boring, believe it or not. To pass the time, I played a game. The object is to stick as many things in Sora's hair as possible without him noticing. My record thus far is 18 things. But there is uncharted land yet to be explored. That's right I have maps of Sora's hair. In fact, I'm selling them on Ebay. They're titled "Sora's Hair: The Untamed Wilderness" ™ And I'm selling them for one million dollars. All the proceeds will go to… my swiss bank account. Nah, I'm kidding. Yeah, anyways, I got to 15 before Sora turned and glared at me. Luckily class was over, so I didn't have to entertain myself anymore.Whoa, time flies when you're annoying people.

TO CHEMISTRY!!!!!!!

Yeah, not only is that my least favorite subject, but that is Ansem's class. I shudder to think what is going to happen. When we got in, for once I was actually on time. ON TIME! And what does he do? The unthinkable, the unimaginable! He made me, yes me,hold a bucket of water in each hand. Sora was there too, of course. And what ticks me off isn't the fact that my arms were getting tired, because… they weren't. I don't have mucsles for nothing. But Sora… poor , poor noodle-arm Sora, was suffering. Really, I felt sorry for him. If anybody was going to make Sora suffer, it's me. And I'm thinking, "Oh, it's on…"

…TO BE CONTINUED

Yeah, well I'm a newbie… All, well most, of my friends helped me with this. Thanks! The next chapter will be up soon... hopefully...