Authors Note: This is the first story I'll be posting here! I'm excited and a bit nervous but I hope that a few of you will like it. So! I'm going to start this from the scene where Yuko finally sees Acchan again, but I'll be changing quite a bit of the dialogue to suit my needs. v u v Please don't call me out on that, especially now that I've warned you beforehand. No doubt I'll mess up my past and present tenses a bit but that's because I'm still getting used to the first person way of writing... I'll do my best from here on out though.
No matter how far I go...
No matter how hard I try...
I just can't reach her.
So I stop, exhausted by now from running up the never-ending flight of steps.
My gaze moves up and I can see her above me now, singing and dancing, sharing her happiness with the crowd along with previous Center Nova.
But she can't see me.
I had already exhausted that hope by yelling and singing as loudly as I could to try and get even a smidgen of notice. But they remained as always, blissfully unaware of my presence.
My sheer disappointment causes me to look away from the picture. I had achieved the Center Nova phenomenon, the same as they! So why must I watch this scene from afar?
Everything I've done! All the pain I've been through, the seclusion, the strenuous rehearsal! Has it all been for naught? Or was I simply not good enough to begin with?
My legs, shaking, finally give away beneath me and I lay on the staircase. My spirit feels broken.
Who would have thought that the undying determination of Yuko Oshima the Ninth could have been shattered so easily?
My body won't even move anymore, I can't get up and most definitely can't start walking again.
Even if I could move there would be nowhere to walk to. The steps ahead of me are crumbling, fading into the nothingness that surrounds me and for the first time in my life, I feel truly alone. It hurts so much more now, than when I had accepted the duty of solitude in order to become Center Nova.
I've failed everyone and in my state of depression I start to make assumptions. My moment of courage likely hadn't saved Akibastar from a fate of oppression, which meant I had broken my promise to Acchan all those years ago. In failing her, I had also failed myself...
"We meet again, Yuko."
My eyes open wide at the sound and I jerk my head up to look around. That voice! I had not heard it in years and to be truthful, I missed it and her terribly.
"Acchan?" I squeak timidly, still looking from right to left and wondering if this was simply a trick that my tired and miserable mind was playing on me.
She appears then, a large and almost translucent figure who still smiles down at me as if she hadn't disappeared so long ago.
My heart is beating wildly as I gaze at her.
"Everyone is singing." She says in that same voice, her eyes sparkling.
It takes me a short while to understand what she means. While I had heard a lot of singing during my time on the endless stairway none of the voices had struck me as particularly familiar.
But now, as I listen long and hard to this song my eyes yet again grow wide.
"The understudies?" I stammer, a look of confusion passing over my face. How was it possible that I could hear them even from where I was?
"They sing to save what they care about," Acchan raises a hand to her lips and stifles a giggle, probably because of my overly baffled expression. She gestures to me before speaking again. "And so it reaches you even here."
Wait, was she saying that this tune was meant to rescue me as well?
I chuckle and shake my head, it was amusing and embarrassing to think that the younger ones would have to rescue me from my own ambition.
Looking up to Acchan again I am surprised when she disappears, only to reappear a moment later right in front of me. This time she is my height and for some reason this pleases me.
For her, the crumbling steps repair themselves and she approaches me slowly. I can't help but notice how every move she makes is so graceful and it reminds me of how much I have missed her.
"Acchan, I-" She raises a hand to stop my talking and I figure she must have something important to tell me.
"Please Yuko, let me start." After nodding my okay she lowers her hand and sends me another one of her dashing smiles. "You've made it this far, so I should tell you why we're all here."
By all she must have meant the other Center Nova.
"This is a place outside of space and time, where we are safe from those who might hurt us." I look up at the mural above, watching the other Center Nova sing on a small stage. "We are here so that we may illuminate the hearts of those who linger even in the darkest reaches of space. This place provides us the ability to sing straight into a heart, even if the planet of its vessel is under the entertainment ban."
My head is spinning now and I stare at her blankly, "So you're the back-up plan?" I instantly regret the words that came out of my mouth and clamp my hand over it quickly.
"Hmm, sort of." Her eyes are dancing and she seems to have taken no offense from my comment. That was good.
"In a way, we help the ultimate goal from behind the scenes. But even if the successors on the outside are successful in lifting the ban, there will still be hearts that require our attention. Because of that we will remain here singing and bringing light to the darkness for all eternity." Wow, that was a long time.
"You said that the understudies would save me, but I've done everything that a Center Nova needs to do! Why can't I stay here?!" I suddenly shout. My outburst seems to catch her off guard and her smile fades into a soft frown.
"You were too early, Yuko." She responds, an evident look of sadness on her face.
"A Center Nova disappears when she reaches the very peak of her radiance and you did achieve that, but you just aren't ready to complete the journey. You have more to go through yet and much more to learn." I feel a tang of despair, at her words. The reason I had been aspiring to become Center Nova was so that I could follow her here.
So that I could be with her.
My eyes fill with tears and I can no longer hold them or my feelings back. "How much longer do I have to wait? I just want to be with you!"
Through my tears I can see that she is taken aback but I continue.
"Why did you have to vanish before I could tell you how I felt?" I say as I wipe my tears away and take a deep breath to steady my wavering voice.
"Atsuko Maeda the thirteenth! I love you and I want to be with you! You're the reason I've been trying so hard to become Center Nova, I've gotten this far because of you! And now I've found you and you're sending me away!" Finally I just lose it and everything spills out, I can't even see her reaction with all the crying I'm doing.
But then she moves in closer and puts her arms around me tightly. Surprised, I gasp and then ever so slowly I relax in her arms and put my own around her as well. My sobbing ceases and she pulls back just a little so that we can face one another.
"Yu- ...Hikari." She surprises me yet again by using my birth name. "I never thought I would hear a confession from you." She admits and I can't help but wonder if I'm about to be rejected and tossed back into reality with a broken heart. "I want to be with you too." She whispers, her mouth moving in closer and closer until finally, we kiss.
My heart nearly jumps out of my chest at her words and as our bashful first kiss becomes imprinted in my mind, I can't help but wonder what will happen to us after this. Atsuko pulls her lips away after a moment and raises a hand to my face so that she can wipe the tears from my eyes. "To be honest, your personality has always captivated me but our situation as idols was a difficult one. I'm sorry that I never said anything."
"I think I can forgive you." I say with a smug smile plastered on my face.
My lips reach for hers again and I kiss her deeply, slipping my tongue into her mouth and feeling the soft moist flesh within. I'm quick to memorize her distinct flavour as I pull her closer to me, after all I still have to leave again soon. Who knew how long it would take until I would get more action!
With the kiss threatening to escalate into a full on make-out session, we both realize that we need to stop and so our lips disconnect.
Her face is flushed and she is slightly out of breath, likely I look the same way to her.
"You have to go before the gate closes again." She reminds me.
"I want to stay." Even if it's here in this wasteland of broken stairs, at least she could visit me and we might truly be lovers.
The fact that she wanted me as well was still sinking in and I was glad to be there with her.
Atsuko sighs and tugs on the small orange pigtail planted firmly on the side of my head. "Go now so that you can learn and become an even more radiant Center Nova. Surpass me, as you said a long time ago."
Something about her words gives me a renewed strength and mends my previously broken spirit. I realize then that she is right. If I'm going to be with her I need to find the strength to become a true Center Nova. I need to climb the stairs properly so that we can embrace at the top forevermore.
"Right, I will do that! But when I come back you owe me cuddles." Maybe even something more, if she would allow it. My newborn smile never once leaves as we separate from each other's embrace, we still end up holding hands though. It feels as if we both can't bear to let the other go.
"Come on, you have to promise me some cuddles, Namiko." I use her real name as well now and grin at her mischievously.
She laughs in that melodic voice of hers and nods once, "I promise."
It takes me a moment before I realize that she is blinking away tears of her own now. Our fate was a cruel one. Confessing our love only to be torn away from each other shortly after.
I step backwards down the stairs slowly, holding her hands for as long as possible before the distance makes that impossible and our fingers are forced to part.
The diamond shaped platform which had first disappeared with me, now materializes under my feet and I pull my microphone out of my coat pocket.
"Come back to me soon, Hikari!" Namiko yells out to me as I fly away from her and the stairs. In my typical fashion I stop, turn around, strike a pose and then blow her a kiss. I will definitely return.
The song, I can hear it clearly now and soon my voice joins in as I leave the void and my love behind.