A/N: Hi! Yeah, I know that this type of "three-girls-are-sent-into-time-into-the-Han-Dynasty-era" story has already been done, but this is my version of it, and it's going to be really different to the normal ones, especially in the sense that these girls are going to be the catalyst for certain romances to start, not the romances themselves (just take a look at the title).

Just as a note, Seraine's name is pronounced as "say-rain"; Lina's and Melanie's is easy enough to say. Cindy-Pindy, thanks for the "Lun Xu" idea, since you won't shut up about him.

I'm Kurai-Shuwazi and I hope you enjoy the first chapter of "The DW Yaoi Matchmakers".

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Chapter 1
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The square rectangle flashed with beams of purple and green, emitting harsh sounds and cries of the fallen.

'Zhuge Liang's unit has withdrawn! Unit morale is rising!'

The words blared in the screen, a blue strip cutting across the battlefield.

"Run away now, Seraine!" Lina screamed, rapidly pressing the 'square' button on her PlayStation Dual Shock 2 controller. Her character, Xiahou Dun, swung his scimitar around him, killing off everyone in range in the TV. "You're in red blood!"

"Call me Lun Xu, damn it!" Seraine screamed back, as her favourite character, Lu Xun, ran away from the hordes of enemies rushing at the orange-dressed boy. On the horizontally cut screen, the two characters met up with each other, both being chased by a large crowd of green-clad soldiers.

"AHH!" Seraine shouted, turning Lu Xun away from the army only to meet more of the army head-on.

"Run, you retard!"

"Don't call Lu Xun a retard!"

"I called you a retard, not Lu Xun!"

"Would you two shut up?" Melanie asked, exasperated. Lina pressed the 'pause' button on the game.

"Just because you're not a D.W fan, doesn't mean we aren't!" Lina replied, whipping around in the computer chair.

"Yeah, Melanie! We like Dynasty Warriors!"

'Oh God,' Melanie thought. 'I should have known better than to say that.'

Luckily for her, however, the two younger girls had already gone back to fleeing the large army building up on the TV screen.

"Seraine, look out!"

The warning had come too late. The bold words 'Lu Xun slain' jumped up, causing the game to end as Lu Xun lay dead and Xiahou Dun thrust his weapon into the ground in defeat.

'Game Over.'

Lina turned and looked at Seraine accusingly.

"It wasn't my fault!" Seraine replied defensively. "I didn't see the arrows!"

"You were standing in front of the fricking archers!" Lina retorted.

"So? You're always dying in 'The Battle of Cheng Du'!"

"But that's only because Ma Chao keeps poking me! I never get to poke back at him!"

Melanie groaned, watching as the two bickered back and forth.

"Well, who cares?" Seraine said finally. "Let's just play again."

"Fine."

"Which stage do you want to play?"

"What did we just play?"

"I think 'The Battle of Jie Ting – Wei Army'."

"Ok then. Just pick anything random."

Lina and Seraine watched as words flickered back and forth on the screen, as Melanie stared at the ceiling. It was 1:04 a.m., but because Melanie's parents were on a working holiday, the three cousins had the house to themselves. Melanie had no idea how her two younger cousins had managed to persuade their parents to let them stay over for an entire week, but they did, and it was currently their second night alone. The girls had been playing Dynasty Warriors 5 for five hours and eleven minutes straight.

"Stop!"

'The Battle of Wu Zhang Plains' flashed.

"Oohs – I wanna be Cao Pi," Lina said, giddy despite the late hour. "You be Sima Yi. We need to level up his stats so that we can use his laser-beam musou thing-y."

"Why do I have to be Sima Yi?" Seraine pouted.

"Cause."

Seraine didn't bother questioning the lack of answer.

"So, Wei side again?"

"Yeah," replied Lina. "Hey, what do you think would happen if we put Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi together in a closet?"

'No, please, no,' Melanie silently begged. 'No yaoi talk.'

"Well, who do you think would be seme?"

Lina looked thoughtful. "Zhuge Liang, maybe?"

"You think?" Seraine asked back.

"Maybe," Lina answered. "But still, Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi won't exactly make the best couple." She paused as she flicked between Cao Pi's blue and silver outfits, finally choosing the latter. "Zhuge Liang would go well with, like, Liu Bei or something, Jiang Wei perhaps. Hell, even Zhou Yu would make a better pairing for Zhuge Liang."

"Zhou Yu?"

"Why not?"

"I thought that you said that Zhou Yu goes best with Sun Ce."

"I did," Lina replied indignantly. "And I shall always stand by that, because Zhou Yu and Sun Ce are THE best couple ever."

Seraine pouted, and was going to form some sort of retort when she was suddenly interrupted by Melanie.

"No! No more yaoi talk!" Melanie said to the girls. "I've had enough! You're always going on about him with him and him with him; doesn't it get annoying?"

Seraine and Lina shook their heads dumbly.

Melanie sighed, and collapsed back onto the couch, defeated.

The gaming resumed.

Twenty minuted passed and the battle was almost over. All that was left to do was kill Zhuge Liang, as Jiang Wei had been beaten beforehand. Cao Pi ran ahead, with Sima Yi following close behind. The 'strategy' that the girls used to level up characters was a fairly easy one to follow. Level up Zhao Yun, since he was the strongest of the starting characters, until he was maxed out and then play in two-player mode, in which Zhao Yun would reduce the life bar of the enemy by ninety-nine point nine percent, and then let the weaker character deal the final blow. They would continue on in that way until the weaker character was maxed out and so on.

Currently, Cao Pi was stabbing at Zhuge Liang's back, until he got hit in the side by one of the elite soldiers. Sima Yi was standing in a corner and building up his musou. The Musou Bar became full and Sima Yi charged. Seraine pushed the 'circle' button, just as Zhuge Liang let off his own musou attack.

"Press 'square', press 'square', press 'square', press 'square'!" Lina screamed frantically, watching the deadlock between Sima Yi and Zhuge Liang while pushing her own 'square' button, sixty-five percent of the time hitting nothing but air.

"I'm pressing 'square'!" Seraine screamed back.

Seraine's thumb was a blur, rapidly hitting down on the controller.

Melanie groaned. Her cousins just didn't know when to stop playing.

Suddenly, there was a loud crashing sound and the PlayStation-playing girls screamed. Melanie had never been more grateful that her house was sound-proof.

The T.V shone with a white light, glowing like the sun's rays. Seconds later, the sound of a shattering mirror echoed loudly and the glass-like screen of the television rained onto the floor, broken into pieces. All was then silent, until Melanie had taken in what had happened.

"What the hell?!" she screamed, jumping up. "What the hell happened? Oh My God, the TV's broken! Damn it; my parents are going to kill me!"

"Well, we don't know what happened!" Seraine said, immediately defending herself. It was true though; she didn't know what had happened. One minute, she was desperately trying to kill Zhuge Liang using Sima Yi and the next, the TV decided to try and make her go blind.

"You must have done something!" Melanie countered. "You've been playing for hours straight; the TV must have overloaded or something."

"But if the TV overloaded, then the power would turn off; it wouldn't suddenly break like that," Lina said, calmly, as though it was ordinary for TV screens to suddenly act up. Lina was probably the most persuasive out of the three, but only when the situation called for it. She was probably the most fearless too, but that said, she was also the weirdest.

Lina walked over to the broken screen, reaching out with her hand to touch.

"Ouch!"

"What happened now?" Melanie asked, sounding more and more anxious as the minutes passed.

"I burnt myself," replied Lina, holding up the burnt finger, and laughing.

Both Seraine and Melanie stared at Lina, who was braving the risk of being burnt once again. She grasped the fragment and was surprised to find it cold, holding it up to the light and examining it.

"Well, I don't know what happened," she concluded.

Melanie slapped her hand to her forehead and groaned.

"Hey," came Seraine's uneasy voice.

"What now?"

"Where are the wires?"

"What?"

Seraine was standing off the side of the TV, peering inside the box.

"Aren't there supposed to be wires inside TVs?" she asked. "This one doesn't have any."

True enough, the screen was still black, but unnaturally; it looked like it had a thin coating of mist surrounding it.

"Dare you to touch it, Seraine," Lina said, tauntingly.

"No!" Melanie cried out. "No one is touching the screen! I'll call the repairman tomorrow and then we'll forget this ever happened!"

"But I wanna touch it!" Lina whined, speaking in slight slang, like a child.

"You touch it then," Melanie said, finally losing it. "But don't blame me if you get an electric shock and die!"

"Okay!"

Lina skipped over happily to the TV set, and very dramatically, made the gun symbol using her index finger and thumb.

"If you kill me," she said seriously, to the TV, while Melanie gaped at her and Seraine looked mildly interested. "Then I swear I will come back and haunt you forever!"

She then stabbed her gun-hand at the TV, gasping as the fingers and wrist became swallowed by the blackness. She jerked her hand back immediately, and stared at the limb in amazement and then at the TV in wonder. Cautiously, she moved even closer, gripping the sides of the TV and plunged her head wholly inside the box.

She heard the scream of two girls, but cared not, as the next scene she saw befell her eyes. Another scream was heard, but only to her ears, and far manlier.

She grinned, pulled her head back and saw that she was once again in the living-room-turned-bedroom of Melanie's house.

"What do you think would happen if we put Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi together in a closet?" she said, repeating her question and smiling madly.

"I don't know," Seraine answered, bewildered when Lina's head had disappeared fully into the TV.

"Want to find out?"

Seraine immediately left the thought at Lina's words. "Hell yeah! But how?"

Lina's smile grew. "Come with me?"

Lina held out a hand and used the other to indicate to the TV. Seraine hesitated slightly, but took hold of the hand nonetheless.

"Coming Melanie?" Lina called.

"Where?" Melanie asked, cynically.

"In there," Lina said, pointing at the TV.

"Quit joking."

"I'm not."

"Sure, Lina, sure you're not."

Lina shrugged. "Well, come if you're bored."

With the parting words, Lina pulled Seraine to the still misty-black TV and pushed her in before jumping in herself, not once letting go of her hand.

Melanie watched as the two girls disappeared. The two girls she was responsible for, in the eyes of the adults.

She groaned and walked over to the wall, bashing her head down in an attempt to clear her mind.

'I've got to be dreaming,' she thought. 'This is what happens in stories. Damn it, I've been reading too many of Seraine's fan fictions.'

Melanie stopped giving herself a concussion and turned to look at the TV, sitting there ever so innocently.

'This had so better be a dream,' she thought, walking over to the box. 'I'll kill someone if it isn't.'

She took a deep breath and allowed herself to drop into the TV, following her cousins into whatever hell, mischief and chaos they found themselves in.

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Chapter 1: End
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A/N: Well, yeah, my first chapters are never good, but PLEASE REVIEW! and hopefully, I'll see you at the next chapter.