"Me and Pete are going to head back now guys, it's going to storm. When you get some sense, come along," James says. He and Peter push off the small log they're sitting on and head off through the trees. The branches and leaves crack and rustle beneath their heavy feet and the wind blows the scent of a coming storm towards them, it's mixed with the scent of the earth. It envelopes them in a comforting embrace, present but not overpowering. A reassurance.
"Peter and I," Remus corrects after them. James gives a half-hearted wave of his hand to acknowledge the chastisement but otherwise says nothing. Sirius smiles to himself, he can't help but love the way that Remus corrects someone when they say something that isn't grammatically correct. James' and Peter's footsteps fade and Remus and Sirius are left alone in the midst of the thick forest. Birds whistle and trill around them, leaves rustle from small forest animals scampering about, foraging. Sirius stretches out his legs and subtly shifts his hand closer on the log to Remus'.
"So," he says in a casual voice. Remus says nothing and Sirius nods contentedly. Most of the time Remus and Sirius don't have to say anything to understand each other and what the other is thinking. No one else understands how they do it but Sirius loves the fact that he and Remus connect on a level so deep that they don't always have to use words to get their thoughts expressed. So he sits in silence until he realizes this is something that Remus will not get unless he uses words to convey his message. So he sighs and rolls his shoulders. Remus' eyes flicker towards him, as they always do, until Sirius settles back and open his mouth to speak. "Moony, I have to say something really important."
"Okay," Remus says. He still doesn't look at Sirius; he just waits for him to speak. Sirius closes his mouth, unable to find words, and gives a little hum in the back of his throat. Remus still doesn't say anything. He will wait until Sirius can find the words he needs and then he will listen with rapt attention, even if it doesn't appear so. Sirius turns his head to gaze at Remus.
Remus is so short, he thinks. He's only as tall as Peter's girlfriend, Ellie, and Ellie is only 5'4". Sirius and James are both 6'1" although James loudly protests that he is at least two inches taller than Sirius. Sirius rolls his eyes and Remus gives them a small smile. Remus' hair is tousled, an effect of the wind, and Sirius finds himself wanting to run his rough fingers through those silky, tawny strands to smooth them out again. He wants to feel them from root to tip. Then perhaps he'll let his hand fall to the smooth, pale column of Remus' neck but he'll pretend that it isn't anything weird, because in fact, Sirius does touch Remus a lot. They cuddle on the couch, if it can be called cuddling. Mostly Remus sits on his lap reading. Sirius rests his chin on Remus' shoulder, his ear by Remus' mouth so he can hear the beautiful words spilling from the full, pink, pretty lips. But best of all, Sirius thinks, are Remus' eyes. Remus' hands are a close second with graceful fingers and thin wrists but Remus' eyes are the absolute best. They're gold, an effect of the wolf, Sirius happily acknowledges. Remus doesn't like them so much for this very reason, they show the wolf in him, and he likes his eyes before the bite more. Clear cerulean, Sirius remembers from one of their three-in-the-morning conversations behind drawn curtains under the light of melting stubs of candles. Sirius thinks he should find some words now as the thunder cracks the air around them.
"Sirius," Remus says. It's all he says because Sirius understands, Remus wants him to hurry, but not hurry, with whatever it is Sirius must tell him.
"Remus," Sirius says. Remus sighs and rolls his eyes.
"I know it's important or we wouldn't be sitting here," Remus says. The rain is falling now, already drenching them. But Remus sits still, as a statue Sirius thinks, and doesn't move from his place.
"How do you know I'm not just making you sit here for my entertainment?" Sirius asks, stalling for the words he cannot find.
"Because you aren't doing it for your entertainment. If it was for your entertainment you'd be holding me up on the Quidditch Pitch. You wouldn't make me sit here with the rain falling from the stars," Remus says. Sirius smiles.
"I like how you talk, Remus," Sirius says and Remus sits up even straighter, if possible, he knows Sirius has begun. "It's like poetry."
"How so?" Remus asks, eyes shining with unmasked amusement and affection.
"Who else says stuff like 'the rain falling from the stars'?" Sirius asks. Remus shrugs his shoulders. "I'll try now though, to talk like poetry. Because I think this is something for pretty words. It has to be right." He stops and rubs his chin thoughtfully, his stubble scratching him because he didn't bother to shave this morning and anyway he's trying to prove to James he's more masculine. Even though he really isn't, he muses. "When I'm with you I don't ever want to leave," he says finally.
"But—" Remus interrupts, the first time he's done anything of the sort. Remus is never one to interrupt.
"I don't know if I could ever be without you is what I'm saying," Sirius says, his voice rising over the rain and the crack of thunder booming after the lace of lightning. "I need you. And I'm beginning to realize why."
"But Sirius," Remus says. He's interrupted again and now he's staring at Sirius, golden eyes clouded copper with confusion. Remus is never confused. Except for the time Sirius, James and Peter declared they had become Animagi. And now. Now Remus was very confused.
"I need you because I'm in love with you. And I really like that feeling a lot," Sirius said finally. The words hung in the air, the thunder seemingly have stopped but the rain continued to fall. Sirius could see Remus shivering and he cast a nonverbal shielding charm around the small boy. Then he cast a heating charm and Remus visibly warmed while Sirius remained wet.
"Sirius, I don't know what to say," Remus stuttered, from cold or embarrassment Sirius could not tell. That was a first. Remus didn't know what to say. Another first.
"That's a first," Sirius remarks dumbly. He can't think of anything else to say because he pretty much expected himself and Remus halfway back to the dorm for a snogging session. Why had he ever thought that? Remus was not one to rush into things. But Remus also was not one without words. "Look, Remus, I'm sorry. Just forget the whole thing," Sirius pleads. But they both know that Remus won't forget. Sirius leaps up and stutters an excuse, ready to flee. Remus' small hand darts and clasps around Sirius' wrist. Sirius stares down at it in shock: Remus' thin fingers wrapped around him, Remus' pale skin against his own golden skin, the water droplets clinging to them both. Remus' fingers shake and Sirius gives a little gasp when he looks up into Remus' blazing gold eyes.
"Sirius," Remus murmurs and Sirius hears him through the falling rain. He yanks Remus up, gently, and crushes their bodies together. Remus rises on his tiptoes but he's still so short so Sirius bends down a little. He can feel Remus' hot, stuttering breath on his cheek and his heart skips for a moment. Remus' hands are fisted in Sirius' drenched shirt now and Sirius' are on Remus' hips possessively. His heart soars for a moment at this observation, that Remus is allowing Sirius to demonstrate this possessive action. Their eyes flutter closed as their hearts pound together separated only by wet skin and drenched thin layers of clothing. "Sirius," Remus murmurs again against Sirius' lips and Sirius trembles. Remus' tone is light and teasing. Sirius relaxes, his heart still beating fiercely because he's holding Remus. "I think this is the part where you're supposed to kiss me," Remus chuckles softly his lips moving against Sirius in a barely there, teasing manner as he laughs.
"I think you're probably right," Sirius stutters. His eyes squeeze shut and he leans forward before he completely loses his nerve, which would be a first for Sirius, and presses his cold-weather chapped lips to Remus' own plump, soft ones. They both gasp slightly and Remus presses closer to Sirius, rising higher on his toes. Sirius grip on Remus tightens to the point of painful but it's a pleasuring pain and Remus whimpers. Sirius' brain melts and his heart is thumping erratically and he's moaning because Remus whimpered. Remus whimpered and Sirius just might die now. And oh God, Remus' tongue just licked Sirius' lips. They break apart but neither of them moves. Their foreheads are pressed together and their cold noses are touching and their lips are still just about connected and their pretty much sucking out each other's frantic breaths and Sirius thinks it's just a little too hot outside with all this rain falling around them.
"Sirius," Remus murmurs for the third time and Sirius' eyes flutter open. "The rain's stopped." Sirius tears his gaze away from Remus to realize that the rain, in fact, has let up and he didn't realize it. Remus is no longer pressed against him; he has leveled his feet again and is gazing up at Sirius. "I want some chocolate," Remus whispers into his chest.
"Okay," Sirius says. And he thinks that they'll both go back to the common room now and change their clothes and settle in that big armchair that Remus really likes to curl in. And perhaps Sirius will pull Remus into his lap again, but this time it will mean something and everyone will know, because Remus will read to Sirius and Sirius won't rest his chin on Remus' shoulder. Instead he'll dip his hands under Remus' shirt for warmth and he'll rub lazy circles on Remus' stomach like he's wanted to do for months and he knows Remus will let him do this. And his lips will smile against Remus' ear and he'll feel Remus' heart beating against his own. And in the morning when they have a cold from standing in the rain they'll cuddle together on Sirius' bed and Remus will wrap them in layers of blankets and James will complain about what idiots they were for standing in the rain when he explicitly warned them to find some sense and come back. And Peter will watch on in amusement while Lily joins in, trying to tell Remus how best to take care of Sirius. But Remus will huff at her and continue playing with Sirius' fingers, ignoring every word the redhead says. And Sirius thinks that that is just a lot better than running back for a songfest.