A/N: There will be a sequel to this that I will post separately. And this is a little bit different then my usual writing style so let me know what you think. So I know the circumstance is a bit 'extreme' But whatever I can do whatever I want. Anyway this takes place sometime after Maggie becomes a grifter. I don't own Leverage!
To ask three thieves
"So guess what?" Nate asked as he leaned in close to Sophie
"What?"
"I got two tickets to go see a lecture on the history of the printing press" Nate looked absolutely ecstatic
"Isn't that a bit...nerdy" Sophie looked at him with an 'Are you kidding me? Are you serious? Have you lost your fricken mind?'
"No. Anyway we're going this Saturday!"
"How long is it?" She asked timidly
"5 hours!" Nate grinned
"Oh," was all Sophie could muster
"You're gonna love it" He gave her a chaste kiss
Sophie sat at the table a bit dumbfounded as Nate almost literally skipped off and upstairs. Oh God, she was so dead. What the hell was she supposed to do? She blinked a few times and then realized that she would have to do something absolutely crazy.
Ask Parker for dating advice.
LEVERAGE
Sophie cautiously approached the blonde thief who was eating cereal while looking out the window. "Hey Parker"
"Hi Soph" Parker didn't bother to look back at Sophie
"So I need your help" Sophie pulled a chair up next to her
Parker raised an eyebrow at the Grifter. "What do ya need?"
"Advice," Sophie admitted shyly
"Aren't you supposed to be the advice person?"
"Well I have a problem and I need advice!"
"Ask Nate or somethin' he always knows what to do"
"But he's the problem!" Sophie whispered loudly
Parker narrowed her eyes at her friend and let a little smile dance across her face. "I'm listening"
"You know how Hardison asked you to go to that Robot thing?" Sophie asked
"That was actually kinda fun"
"Anyway Nate asked me to go to the most boring thing in the world!" Sophie said in outrage
"Can't be that bad"
"Do you want to go sit through a 5 hour lecture on the printing press? No! I didn't think so," Sophie crossed her arms and pouted
"Ohh ouch that is bad," Parker said in the sympathetic voice she could manage since it was VERY funny.
"What should I do?" Sophie asked hopelessly
"Just tell him you don't want to go"
Sophie looked at her with an 'Are you crazy? That's the worst idea in the world! Are you fricken kidding me' look. "Are you serious?"
"You asked me for my advice and that's what I would do"
Sophie just stared at her with a bewildered look. "Ughhh you're no help!"
"Fine, why don't you call Maggie then. She always knows how to deal with Nate" Parker said in a snobby voice to show that she was offended for not being appreciated.
Sophie resisted the urge to flip her friend off and then stormed out of the room with the phone already to her ear.
LEVERAGE
Sophie sat across the table from Maggie, holding her cup of coffee in her hand.
"So what stupid thing has Nate done this time?" Maggie asked boredly but the slightest amusement flashed across her face
"He's dragging me out to a 5 hour lecture about the printing press. I do NOT want to go" Sophie sighed and took a sip of her coffee
"You could always steal the tickets give them to someone else and then have sex before the lecture so he forgets" Maggie suggested bluntly
Sophie looked at her HONEST friend with an 'You must be God! How did I never think of that?' look. "That's a perfect idea!"
"Yeah, it may not seem like this but he is VERY easily distracted" Maggie gave her fellow Grifter friend a knowing look
"You did it to him?" Sophie voice was a mix between awe and excitement
"All the time," Maggie said proudly, "although sometimes...I wish I would've gone to the boring lecture"
"What do you mean?" Sophie cocked her head to the side
"You don't remember what I said? He was TERRIBLE in bed!" Maggie said a hushed voice
"Oh," Sophie said in what she always pinpointed as her adorable pity voice, "he isn't anymore. Which is quite lucky for me"
"Oh don't gloat it in my face Devereaux," Maggie teased
Sophie smirked at her victory.
"So, are you gonna do it?"
"You can bet on it. I asked Parker and you know what the bloody girl said?"
"What?" Maggie asked curiously
"Tell him you don't want to go!" Sophie looked at her friend with the same 'What kind of answer is that?' look
Then they both started laughing. "Parker's so adorable, how she thinks that works on men"
"I know! But I'm sure if Hardison asked her she would just find a way out of it too"
Suddenly Sophie's phone buzzed. It was a text from Nate:
Parker told me your at coffee with my ex-wife...trying to figure out how to get out of the lecture
"Shit!" Sophie cursed under her breath
"He found out," Maggie sighed
"Yeah."
Sophie texted him back:
Finally said ex for once. And I'm sure if we don't go to this lecture you'll surely make up for it by giving me one
He texted back almost immediately:
Oh you better believe it
"Ughhh" Sophie groaned and threw her phone on the table
"Now you're going to get lectured" Maggie gave a strained smile
"Please. DON'T remind me"
"Sorry I can't be of more help" Maggie apologized
"It's fine" Sophie waved it off. Looks like she would have to call the professional French golfer who was drinking champagne on a rich mans yaht. Or more commonly known as:
Tara
LEVERAGE
Tara was rifling through a rack of dresses as Sophie walked around timidly behind her.
"So what's up Misses 'I'm not gonna tell you why I'm coming until I'm here'?" Tara asked as she turned around to look at Sophie
"So Nates dragging me to this 5 hour long lecture about the printing press. I asked Parker what I should since I REALLY don't want to go. She said I should just say I don't want to go. That was a stupid idea so I asked Maggie since you know she was married to him. She said that I should take the tickets, sell them, and then have sex with him to distract him. Then Parker told Nate and now he's mad at me and is gonna lecture me about it" Sophie pouted and leaned up against one of the dress racks
"Maybe when you guys end up talking you should just tell him you don't want to go" Tara said like it was obvious
"What is it with you two! Nate isn't like that. If I tell him I don't want to go he'll just be a big baby about it and pout for weeks"
"Well why don't you slap some manliness into him! That bastard needs someone to set 'im straight" Tara said firmly, pushing Sophie's shoulder roughly but playfully
"So your saying I should just tell him to MAN-UP and get over the fact I don't want to go" Sophie repeated
"Mhm. Now what do you think about this dress?" Tara held up a sparkling dark blue dress
"It's a bit long" Sophie muttered
"I'm not aiming for a short dress."
Sophie quirked an eye-brow up at her friend. "Uh-huh"
"Do you need a dress?"
"No, but in a bad mood and shopping ALWAYS helps." Sophie smiled and started looking through dresses
"Oh! What about this?" She held up a flowing black silk one
"I wouldn't wear it but you're the one buying it" Sophie shrugged. She found a particularly interesting one and took it off the rack. It was tapered at the waist and was cut in a shutter pattern down the back. Also it was very short and had a deep v-neck, which she always liked. It came in two different colors. Red and yellow. She picked up the yellow and showed it to Tara. "What about this?"
"Whoa! I need a pair a sunglasses" Tara joked, shielding her eyes
Sophie rolled her eyes and put it back. "Ha ha very funny"
"Let me see the red one"
Sophie pulled out the red one and Tara nodded approvingly. "I'm gonna go try it on!" Sophie dashed off and quickly changed into it. When she came out Tara was leaning against the wall.
She let out a low whistle. "Damn! You look good in that!"
"Thanks" Sophie smiled and was about to go take it off when she thought of something. "Hey, what if I wear this back to the apartment and say that you and I are going out to drinks. That way he won't even be able to form a coherent sentence, much less yell at me." She grinned at her own amazing idea
"That'll keep you from getting yelled at but what about the lecture?"
"I'll go with Maggie's idea and just have sex with him" Sophie shrugged
"Don't you do that ALL the time?" Tara said in a dead serious voice
"Yeah. So?"
Tara laughed and waved her off. "Whatever you say girl"
Sophie bought the dress and then changed into it. She grinned as she drove back to the apartment because she knew he would not with this war.