Don't kill me...
Okay, so I admit, I have been writing this story for the past few days, but I wanted to try out my Poetry skills! :D And my Haiku skills, (Or as Kai would most likely call them, Kai-Ku's.)
I apologize in advance for the depressing-ness. It has been a harder week, mainly with my family, (Grandma is acting up again and...Well, I could honestly care less about her right now.) I feel kind of...Torn at the moment. Metaphorical Blaise, or who I should call my Genevieve Collins, because that's how she acts, is pissing me off so much. I know I really shouldn't be saying any of this because I don't like to Gossip, but seriously. I have had enough of her calling out MY Mal actors name and acting like a, pardon the language, Slut. Gah! I really do not like her at all. She was another friend I had a huge fight with. She hates my guts now because she knows I like my Mal actor and I have heard that she likes him too. Though, my good friend said she was kidding around. I don't think she is.
Anyway, enough of my complaints. So...Anyone hear heard of Hunger Games? Well, guess who's going to the movie Friday night? MOI! Haha, truthfully, I just want to see the games and all of the action. :) Also, Josh Hutcherson...But that's besides the point. And I'm going with my Mom, my bestie and her mom. GNO! :D The reason for this is because everyone in my class has already made plans to go together and guess what; they never include me. It's alright though, I much rather hang out with my mom, my friend and her mom than sit with a bunch of over-obsessive teenage girls who shun me because I only read the books once.
Okay, and this is my promise; The next update I post WILL BE HOSTAGE! I will not be posting another story until I finish one. Anyway, my Cause of Death buddy is a-textin' and I have an essay that's a-calling! You guys are amazing! :D And for those of you writing stories, keep up the MARVELOUS work. :D
Amy Chen pushed her way into the Drunk Tank. It was rumored that Detective Mal Fallon might be here...Then again, no one really knew where he was.
"Excuse me," she called and the bartender faced her and frowned.
"What is it?" he growled and Amy gave him a stern look.
"Where's Mal Fallon?"
This gave the bartender a laugh. "Detective Fallon...He's over there, in the corner booth. He's been singing love songs for the past few hours about some chick named Natara."
Amy frowned. "You don't know what he's going through, so I suggest not to make fun of him." Amy stormed off and drifted towards the designated booth. She didn't expect him to be sober...In fact, she thought he'd be drinking until he puked. 'At least he hasn't let his mind go...' she thought and joined him
"Hey Mal," she said quietly and Mal didn't bother looking up. He had an old guitar in his hand, plucking at the strings.
"You know," he began, "when my mom died...My world collapsed. I held her hand as she whispered her last words and closed her eyes helplessly."
Amy nodded, intent on listening. Obviously, he had something in mind. "Gradually," Mal continued, still fiddling with the strings, "it got better. I didn't see her in my nightmares anymore. Then Nat came around..."
"Mal," Amy began and she placed her hand on his shoulder. "I know this has been a really hard week for you..."
"She filled the void my mom left. She was perfect in every way...And now..." Mal sighed heavily and sat back. "Now...She's gone too."
Amy sighed and shook her head. "It all depends on your attitude, Mal. When Ken died..." Amy stopped. She swallowed heavily before continuing. Ken's death, though happened a year previous, was still a rough subject for her. "When Ken died, I felt like everything and everyone was against me. Remember how I kept refuge in my home? That was all foolish."
"You're mourning the dead," Mal replied dully, "how is that foolish?"
"Well first, if Ken were still alive, he wouldn't want me doing any of that," Amy continued with a soft smile. "Now think; You haven't been to work since the incident and the bartender told me you've been writing love songs to Natara. Although she might have found the songs flattering...How do you think she would react to being absent from work?"
Mal sighed. "I can't go back there," he grumbled. "Everything reminds me of her."
"I have the same problem, Mal," Amy said quietly. "Everywhere I turn, I still see Ken. Maybe it's not a bad thing. Mal...We've both seen the love of our lives die in a horrible way..."
She was right...She always was. Mal depended on Amy's courage and bravery at points. He looked at the ground and closed his eyes. Maybe she was right; seeing things that reminded him of Natara wasn't such a bad thing.
"I wish I could just tell her that I loved her," he said and with that small sentence, he broke down. He covered his eyes with his hand and sobbed. His father would have called him pathetic...And thankfully, Amy wasn't his father. She scooted next to him and pulled him into a friendly embrace.
"I'm so, so sorry, Mal," she whispered quietly.
"I miss her so much. Why does everyone I love have to be torn away from me?"
"Everything happens for a reason and in the end, it will all work out," she reassured him and he kept crying. They were drawing the attention of some curious drunkards, but their minds weren't set on that. They held each other and cried over the loss of their most loved ones.
For Mal, Natara was all he ever had. Sure he had some of his male friends, but every man needed a strong woman to guide him; Natara was his. Even with his severe distrust in women, he found trust within her.
Near the end of the night and into the beginning of the next morning, Mal pulled himself together.
"Mal, I want you to know that the Memorial Service for Natara is tonight. Please come."
Even though he knew he wouldn't be able to make it through the first speech, he nodded. 'Maybe,' he thought, 'I can contribute one of my favorite memories...'
Mal decided to spend his last day off of work, sleeping. This was a very bad idea.
"Mal," Natara called, running into an abandoned alleyway. Mal followed closely behind. "He went this way! Keep on him!"
"I'm trying," Mal panted. "He's too fast!"
Natara rolled her eyes and looked around for any movement. A dark figure caught her eye and she ran to it. Mal tried to warn her...Tried to pull her away...Even take the bullet...But everything moved too fast. He saw the silver pistol lining up for that fatal shot. He tried to run, take the impact and save Natara.
BLAM!
"Natara!" Mal cried. She gasped and looked down at her chest, her clothes slowly revealing the blood the wound had yet to offer. She collapsed and her killer became invisible as Mal ran up to Natara. He gripped her hand and applied pressure to the wound.
"Stay with me, Partner," he growled. "I can't lose you now!"
Natara, barely breathing at this point, placed her hand on top of his. "Mal...I lo..." Her thought wasn't finished. She coughed heavily and her head rolled to one side, causing Mal to panic.
"NATARA!" he yelled. "Please stay with me!" It was all hopeless though. He kept calling her name, tears now streaking his cheeks. "Please," he begged, "please be alive. Please be faking...Please let this all be a dream!"
The scene shifted into a hospital room; Natara was on Life Support. Mal had stayed by her side as long as the doctors allowed. Friends and family surrounded the passed agent and her begging friend.
Mal had never truly gotten over the fact that she was dead. He kept whispering, "Please be alive, Nat," over and over again. No one tried to stop him...No one could.
Near midnight that night, a doctor approached Mal, a grave look etched upon his aged face.
"Mr. Fallon...It's time to go," he said calmly and gently.
"I can't leave her," he whispered. "What...What if she wakes up?"
"Mr. Fallon, I am sorry to say this but Natara didn't make it. She died a few minutes she had gotten shot." The doctor rested his hand on Mal's shoulder. "We did all we could..."
"If you did all you could, she would be alive," Mal spat bitterly. "If you actually tried to save her, then things wouldn't be like this. I could tell her that I love her. I could finally give her what she truthfully deserves. Natara has been given nothing by crap all of these years and I want to give her more than what she deserves."
"Mr. Fallon, please..."
"No! I can't leave her! I won't leave her. I refuse to under all circumstances."
His protests were invalid to the doctors. They resulted to dragging him out of the room.
Mal woke up with a start, his cell phone ringing. He was panting heavily, too scared to even glance at the phone. After taking several deep breaths, he picked up the phone. "Mal Fallon," he responded.
"Mal, it's Neha," the voice replied. "Listen, Amy told me what happened yesterday and I want you to know you shouldn't feel forced to come to...Come to Natara's Memorial Service."
Mal glanced at the clock. It was three in the afternoon; giving him four hours to prepare to cry his eyes out. Great.
"I want to come," Mal replied. "Neha...Natara was my best friend...And the..." Mal couldn't continue. "I'll be there at seven, alright?"
Neha sighed heavily. "Thanks Mal. You're a huge support for our family right now. It means the world to us." She hung up, leaving Mal feeling horrible, as usual. He slumped back into bed and stared at the ceiling.
He closed his eyes and tried to think of a happier place...A memory that was faded in the distance. No...It wouldn't be allowed. Every memory that came to mind was either Natara's last words or the last minutes he spent with her lifeless corpse. "Natara," he sighed, "why did you have to leave? People keep telling me things happen for a reason...Why was you getting killed a good reason?"
He spent the next hour questioning motives. Why was she dead? Why did she have to die now? Why couldn't he take the bullet? Why was he suffering the most?
He came up with one conclusion, 'Because everything bad has always happened to me. I lost my mom...I lost Tasha...I lost Ken...And now Natara?'
Mal couldn't believe any of this. He had convinced himself that it was all a dream; that Natara's death was just a trick of the mind.
Why wasn't he waking up, though?
Mal spent the next three hours getting ready, but at a slow pace. When the time for the memorial finally came, Mal made his way to the police station, the designated area. He didn't expect that the first person to talk to him would be Raj Mansingh.
"Detective Fallon," Raj greeted rather solemnly. "It's so nice to see you again."
"Yeah," Mal sighed. "It's nice to see you too."
They shared an awkward silence before Raj spoke. "May I have a minute with you? It's something urgent."
Mal nodded and followed Raj into a more secluded area in the bull-pen. He ran his hand through his hair and sat down. This was not how Mal remembered him. In fact, he even noticed that the normal bulge caused by his knife was absent. Raj was broken, just like he was.
"Natara...She thought very highly of you..." he explained. "In fact, when you stood up for her...I noticed a small trace of passion in her eyes. I would expect it to grow after what happened throughout this past year."
"Yes, Sir," Mal said. "I just wish..."
"Wishing is not an option here, Mr. Fallon. Natara is gone, and that's our final wish from her."
With this depressing note, Raj stood up. "The ceremony is about to begin. I'll talk to you after, if that's alright..."
Mal nodded shortly and followed behind Raj to the main area, cleared just for this night. The first thing Mal saw was a picture of the federal agent; her beauty drawing him in. He took a seat where he could look at the picture and Captain Yeong stepped up to a podium.
"Thank you all for coming to this...Opportunity to remember the life of Natara Mansingh Williams," she began slowly. "We'll turn the time over for anyone who wants to share any memories and after, we'll have refreshments in the Break Room." Yeong left the podium all to quickly and it was silent. No one seemed to be up to sharing a memory. Mal reached for his coat pocket to make sure that a slip of paper still resided. When his suspicions of the papers whereabouts were confirmed, he sat back a little.
The time wasn't right.
It was a one minute silence before Blaise stood up and approached the podium. She looked nervous, especially with Natara's family around.
"Hey, I'm Detective Blaise Corso. I didn't know Natara for that long, and I'll admit, the start of our friendship consisted of name-calling and rude retorts, but after getting to know Natara...And after she saved my life...Well, things changed."
Mal smiled slightly. He had known Blaise long enough that she would have never admitted that anyone saved her life. She was a very prideful person.
"She was brilliant...Caring...Mentioned constantly in good, sincere ways. Especially by her long-time partner, Mal Fallon. So, what I'm trying to say is, Natara changed my views and...Even a bit of my life. That's...That's all," she stepped away and ducked back into her seat. Blaise had broken the ice for the others and officers stepped up, sharing fond memories of Natara and at some points, the bull-pen filled with laughter.
Neha explained how grateful she was for Natara, how she had saved her lives countless times and made it possible for her to be speaking today. Anita Mansingh reminisced memories of younger Natara and her first day at Kindergarten and how she begged to stay home, even trying to get herself sick so she could stay at home. Mal had always thought Natara just kissed her mom's cheek and ran into the school building; not actually picking a fight.
Amy rambled on about how she, despite the captains efforts, was one of her good friends. Other officers stood up and gave their views on death. Some were rather depressing while the others were hopeful; something Mal needed. It was an hour before the unwanted silence came back and Raj stood up. The room went deathly silent. No one dared to talk, and Mal feared, breathe. Though with his tough demeanor, Mal knew Raj meant no harm.
"Good evening," he greeted with a nod. "Tonight is an especially hard night for my family and I, and even some of you who have dedicated your time to Natara and her...Needs. She, indeed, was a wonderful girl and many of you would agree. I just wish I saw that more. You see, Natara and I weren't on close measures. Sure, during the Holidays, we would exchange polite conversations...But she would have back-up." Raj's eyes connected with Mal and Mal squirmed a bit. "Not that I didn't like the back-up...He was fun to talk to and what made me like him more was the fact that he cared for my daughter enough to put up with me. That, my friends, is a sign most fathers would want to see from their daughter's friends or boyfriends.
"When Natara was a little girl, she wasn't what you see today; she was horrified of school. She knew she couldn't make any friends...She just knew it. So, every night, she'd cry to me and her mother, begging to take her out of school. My wife and I were strong about this and in the end, I was left alone with my daughter. Tears quickly came to her eyes, as they had on several occasions and I decided to please Natara with a simple Haiku." Raj fumbled in his suit jacket, looking for a piece of paper. Once found, he cleared his throat and read is slowly, making sure to count out the syllables.
"Her name, Natara,
"Midnight hair and pretty eyes,
"Princess of my world."
Raj pocketed the paper and sighed heavily. "It hurts to let my baby girl go...I shouldn't have to bury her at my age. All a father wants is for his children to live a long, happy life and hope to never see the day they die. The father wants to be there, when she dies, welcoming her angelic form into paradise. Unfortunately, I won't be there for Natara...But she'll be there for me and everyone else.
"Before I step away from this podium, I want to thank a very special man in Natara's life. She talked about him constantly, making sure he had a good name about him; Mal Fallon. Mal...She truly loved you and if she were still alive...I would most definitely grant you her hand in marriage because I know your love for her was also true."
With that said and Mal nearly in tears, Raj stepped away from the podium. Everyone whispered quietly, mentioning Mal and his little speech.
When he couldn't take the whispers anymore, he stood and shuffled to the podium, hoping that the whispers would stop.
"Let me just start with this; Natara was my best friend," he said, trying to keep composed. "She made me laugh, she laughed at my jokes, and we had each others back. When Tasha died, all she wanted to do was make sure I wasn't drinking myself to death. Natara knew me all too well. So, when I sat with her, trying my best to save her life...I knew it wouldn't work. I knew I would fall into the same path I did when I lost Tasha, only, suicide might have been a big option. However, Natara left an imprint on others, including myself. While I spent days in the Tank, mourning the loss, I never took a drink. I just knew Natara wouldn't have wanted it.
"Instead, I wrote poems, songs; All dedicated to Natara. And I have to thank Amy for comforting me last night and reminding me of the Memorial, as well as Neha. So...I addition...I have a poem I wrote for Natara that I wrote by her bedside in the hospital." Mal gently took the piece of paper from his coat and placed it on the podium. He took a deep breath and began to read.
"Poem for the Federal Agent...
"A federal agent from the FBI
"Was the last person that would catch my eye.
"Brave, Strong, and very Smart,
"Natara was also kind in heart.
"Sharing her light with everyone,
"It's hard to think she won
"This crazy roller coaster of life,
"Even though hers ended in strife.
"A fatal wound took her away,
"She's still thought about every day.
"As her Partner, I have learned
"That Natara always yearned
"To please her family and her friend
"Right until the bitter end.
"But she wouldn't want any of this;
"A mournful Reminisce.
"No, Natara would want us to smile
"And make her memories last awhile.
"I have no say in what Natara thought
"But more of what Natara taught.
"A federal agent from the FBI
"Has done more than just catch my eye.
"There's not a day when she doesn't cross my mind.
"A moment of peace and solitude, I can never find
"Natara Williams, learner of the arts,
"Also the captor, of my heart."
The room was silent, besides the quiet sobs coming from Natara's family and her closer friends. Mal decided to take a second to clear his head and looked down at the poem once more. He remembered reading this to her several times, even though she couldn't hear. Her forced breathing was the only response, and that secretly killed Mal. He stood up straight once more and continued to speak.
"Not only was Natara my best friend; she was the love of my life. So, please, in Natara's memory, this isn't the time to sit at home and cry, or go to a bar and drink away your pain. I made a mistake similar and I know that it wasn't the smartest thing. And I am not a religious man, but I know Natara is in a better place because that's where she belongs. She deserves nothing more than paradise itself. Thank you..."
Mal stepped away and continued to his seat. When he sat down, Amy scooted next to him and smiled gently. "Mal," she whispered, "that was beautiful. Natara would have loved it."
Mal smiled back just as gently. "Amy...Thank you...If you didn't invite me here tonight, I would most likely be getting drunk right now or even killing myself. Truth is...I haven't fully let go...But I am on that path."
Amy smiled and gave his hand a quick squeeze.
"Stay strong, Detective Fallon," she whispered and moved back to her original seat. Mal sighed and looked to the side.
"Stay strong," he repeated and felt comfort rest in his heart for the first time since Natara died.
He was going to be okay.