Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Harry Potter. That right belongs to .J.K. Rowling. The Song is Last Christmas, by Wham. Thanks for reading and please review! Have a great Holiday! Merry Christmas!
Tonks glanced around her apartment, the tall tree she had bought a few weeks ago seemed to consume her whole living room.
Glancing at the clock, she hurried to lay out all the food she had made for her soon to be guests.
She and a group of her friends were going to be decorating her tree today, two days before christmas.
Her parents would have come but their Christmas present from her was a trip to Italy, and they had left two days ago...and so this Christmas she was for the most part by herself...
But for now she had friends coming over to keep her company.
To keep her in the Holiday Spirit.
Tonks knows she should be excited.
But she knows somehow her heart is aching.
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
She knew why she was so upset. How couldn't see?
Last year she had fallen in Love with the one, Remus Lupin...
And she had thought...so hoped, that he had fallen in Love with her, too.
But the very next day you gave it away
Tonks missed their conversations...their laughter through the night as they chatted with Sirius in the kitchen.
How their friendship grew into something more.
When she would close her eyes and only see his bright Hazel eyes sparkling with amusement as he laughed.
And then it was Christmas...and she thought he was the one. Thought he wanted her...but it was there and gone.
The night ended and he began avoiding her...making excuses.
This year to save me from tears
But this year Tonks was determined to move on.
No more pining for him.
He was nothing.
Even if that nothing made her heart skip a beat and then ache with barely concealed Love.
I'll give it to someone special
It would be fine if Remus didn't want her...She could move on.
It wasn't like he was special or anything.
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
Tonks smiled as her doorbell rang...and when she opened her door she couldn't help but be slightly cheered up by the faces of her friends as they came inside her apartment.
Coats were hung and kisses on cheeks were passed around.
Laughter and merriness bubbling in everyone's eyes like the champagn being opened and poured in clear sparkling glasses.
I'll give it to someone special
She blushed slightly as her friends giggled and pointed out guys they invited.
One catching her eye and winking with a quick grin.
Tonks smiled. But her heart really wasn't in it.
Once bitten and twice shy
"Forget him." She told herself over and over again except her stubborn mind kept on changing it to "Find him."
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
"Find him, and then do what?" Tonks argued with herself as she started to decorate her tree with her friends.
Tell me baby do you recognize me?
"Does he still remember that time he showed me how to waltzs?" Tonks wondered to herself.
He's probably forgotten.
Well it's been a year it doesn't surprise me
"He twirled me around and around until all I could do was laugh. The room spinning into a blur of colors only catching the light in his eyes."
"Holding onto that memory even as I know he turned me down a month later."
"I remember tripping and falling. The twirling ending as I stumbled foreward...and so ends that." Tonks thought to herself.
It was nothing.
Happy Christmas
"Was it nothing when he caught you? When you and him fell to the ground and laughed...lingering on the floor even as the fire burned out in the fireplace?"
Tonks growled at her romantic side...but that only reminded her of Remus and her eyes filled with sadness...wondering when she would ever let him go.
Musing this, she let out a helpless giggle as she saw one of her friends staring at her strangely. No doubt the emotions whip-lashing across her face made her friend fear for her sanity.
But this Christmas was only reminding her of her last...and that one hadn't exactly ended well.
But she supposed when you involved your heart in such matter...There really were only two conclusions.
And one of them, Heartbreak, was happening to her.
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
She smiled politely as her guests left later.
Flopping down on her couch with a sigh, and raking her hands through her hair, which she had decided to change from Pink to Red...after all it was the Holiday.
Even if that Holiday was being spent alone...
But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
She sighed later on as she cleaned her last dish and emptied her living room of any garbage lingering from the party...
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
Tonks snapped awake from where she had drifted off on the couch when she hear her doorbell chime...
Groggily she went to the door, the champagn affecting her already poor balance.
Attempting to lean against the door to peer through the peep-hole to see who was chiming her...Her attempt turned more into her smacking into the door, with her nose landing into the peep-hole.
She bolted up-right when she heard someone from the other-side of the door chuckle and she glared...realizing a minute later, again the champagn, that she was in-fact glaring at her door and not the chuckling person.
Yanking the door open and forgetting the safety Auror rules and the common sense Muggle rules, of not opening the door if you don't know who it was...
She glared at the chuckling person, with their head bent, she hadn't realized till the man had glanced up, who he was...
A crowded room friends with tired eyes
She stared, blinking in amazement and utter belief at Remus Lupin chuckling at her in the doorway to her apartment.
His Hazel eyes just as they seemed two weeks ago, when Dumbledore had sent them on a mission together for the Order; A Mission spent in somplete silence...
Tonks gazed stupidly at him a moment longer, until her tipsy brain caught-up to her and she realized who she was gazing stupidly at...
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
Glancing between inside her apartment and the cause of her heartache outside, Tonks wondered if he would notice if she kicked the door close and ran to her bed and hid under the covers.
She supposed not.
Well she supposed he wouldn't see her run into her bedroom and under the covers...But surely he was quite smart, so he should notice her kicking the door close.
Actually, Tonks realized her plan would never work...After all, in her drunken state, she'd likely only make it to the floor by her couch.
Yep, not even to the couch.
My god I thought you were someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
She smiled timidly as he came into her apartment, the Romantic side of her brain searching his face hungrily for signs of why he was here and then trying to remember romance novels to compare this scene to theirs, and hoping it would turn out the same way.
The other side of her brain was telling her The Romantic Side to shut-up and not be so stupid.
A man under cover but
you tore me apart
Ooooh
Now I've found a real love you'll never fool me again
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
His eyes pleaded with her's to hear him out as his words washed out of him like a volcano that had just erupted.
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
None of his words seemed to really reach her senses, her ears only hearing nothing...
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
The same old words said over and over.
Apologies, as he tries to say why they can't be together.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
But then his words seem to change and her breath catches as she hears his tune start to change...
A man under cover but you tore me apart
Maybe next year I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone special.
His words barely registering with her...Tonks just keeps watching his face...his eyes...
Watches as they change and then sparkle...
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
Listens as her hearing seemes to clear, as he stops apologing...stops saying "No."
This year to save me from tears
Listens as she catches the word "Yes."
I'll give it to someone
And knows she's finally won...
I'll give it to someone special.
Tonks could be forever happy, staying in that moment, with him just saying the word "Yes," but she knows she's even happier to keep the moment moving foreward, as her World seems to move again and her heart finally looses it's ache.
And as Remus takes her in his arms again and kisses her until all she thinks about is him...
She's happy to stay in this moment, As his smiling lips brush over her cheek and to her ear...As he whispers those words to her.
Words, she thinks are even better than the word, "Yes."
As Tonks and Remus lay down near the fireplace, holding each other tightly; she remembered once more of something she had thought of...
Tonks supposed when you involved your heart in such matter...There really were only two conclusions.
And one of them, Heartbreak, had happened to her.
And one of them, Love, was happening to her.
"Merry Christmas," She whispered to Remus as once again she gave her heart to this man...Knowing that he would cherish it always...