Hi everyone, my name's Alice. This is my first story on the great FanFiction site, so go a bit easy on me. I'm still figuring out how everything works in this 'field' (normally I'M the one reading, not writing). I'm going to send this fic I've been working on for a test drive. If you like how it goes, I'll continue to post it here.

-Alice (I know, my name's a bit ironic for PoM authors)

DICLAIMER: I don't own the Penguins of Madagascar, and probably won't EVER.

Kowalski stared at the computer, obviously with conflicting thoughts. "Skipper..."

The said penguin stood a couple feet away, calmly sipping his coffee, watching over the scene. Birds chirping outside, Kowalski scanning the computer, Private and Rico messing with the scanner-type printer, and an unconscious zookeeper slumped down in the corner. Everything was going according to plan, so far. "What is it, Kowalski?"

"Um...based on the fact that we can't read, I used these symbols and pictures here as clues."

"Well," Skipper frowned. "Clues to what?"

Kowalski glanced at the electronic device again. "I believe we're getting a new transfer."

"A new transfer! Smashing! They'll probably be very nice and I bet we'll-" The young hyper penguin was interrupted by another who was not so keen on the idea.

"No, Private, it is NOT 'smashing'. What if they're another spy out to steal Kowalski's inventions or our classified information or something? This isn't good at all." Their leader began to pace across the dull-colored countertop.

"But Skippah-"

"No 'buts' young Private. We are NOT letting the spy anywhere near us unless we're...spying...on the enemy spy."

"Erm...Skipper?" The intellectual penguin began, yet again.

"YES?" Kowalski paused, with an expression on his face clearly revealing that he was hiding something (and failing at it). "What is it? Spit it out."

"The transfer- it's another penguin, Skipper."

Simply put, their leader was not pleased with this information. There is no need for me, the author, to go into detail with what happened. At all.

After Skipper (sort of) calmed down, he spoke. "Kowalski, are you SURE about this?"

The genius looked a bit hurt that his commander would even question his certainty. "72.3% sure, Skipper."

"Okay then. Let's get the chimps down here to help us decode these squiggly lines so that we can gather more intel on this 'transfer'." The penguin was gaining back his composure as a dignified leader rapidly by giving orders. "Rico, go bring them here."

The psychotic penguin jumped up from smushing his face on the scanner, laughing slightly evilly as he slid out of the room.

"Are you sure sending Rico out to do that is the best idea?" The tallest of the remaining three asked.

"Not quite. But he gets the job done."

Private jumped over to the counter that both Skipper and Kowalski were standing on. "Is it really necessary to call every new transfer a spy before we even meet them?"

"Yes. Like I always say: guilty until proven innocent." Skipper responded.

Kowalski's non-existent eyebrows furrowed. "I think it's supposed to be the other way around."

Skipper was about to make a smart reply when Rico came back in, dragging Phil and Mason behind him.

"Hello, Phil and Mason," Private waved.

The monkeys lay in a heap by the window the weapons expert pulled them through. As they began to get up, they shot Rico a dirty look. "Greetings, Private." Mason turned to Skipper. "Now why on EARTH did you send Rico to bring us here in a MOST unpleasant manner?"

"Kowalski found out that there's going to be a 'new transfer'," he said the last part with a hint of distaste. "We need some more information on them, but since we can't read, we need you to translate."

The chimps narrowed their eyes, but still obliged. "Fine. We're here already anyway. But PLEASE do not order Rico to retrieve us again." Skipper nodded, so Phil and Mason got to work decoding the strange human symbols on the computer's monitor.

Phil rapidly translated scribbles to hand gestures, and Mason just as quickly translated those to words, audible to everyone in the room. "It appears that the new transfer is a penguin-"

Skipper cut him off. "Yes, yes, we know that already. Get to the good stuff that proves they're a spy."

The chimps frowned, continuing on. "As I was saying, she's from an aquarium in California-"

"Wait- WHAT?" The penguin leader had a slightly confused look on his face. "SHE?"

"Indeed, Skipper."

The previously mentioned penguin began muttering under his breath inaudible words while pacing back and forth again on top of the smooth countertop I enjoy describing so much.

Skipper's head swiveled towards the primates. "She wouldn't happen to just be stopping by here until something tragic that happened to her that I don't care about is fixed; say, for instance, her habitat was 'accidentally' maliciously destroyed as the result of top secret agents, arch-enemies or snow-cone eating zombies. Anything like that?"

All surrounding animals had a bewildered expression upon their faces.

Phil and Mason exchanged a quick glance confirming each other's suspicions. Skipper had lost his marbles. Again. "No, Skipper. It seems that she will be staying."

"No!" Skipper moaned. "I don't want to have a prancing, glitter-filled hormonal girly-girl wandering through our base, filling it with rainbows, Lunacorns and motivational stickers! We already have Private for that."

Private gasped. "That's offensive to say when I'm right here!"

"Good, because I say it quite a bit when you're not around, too," Skipper snapped. "You need to stop using our recording time up on the TV for that silly Lunacorn show."

"It's not silly! It teaches proper behaviors like sharing, kindness, and-"

"All the other mushy-gushy things you can think of," his leader finished, leaving Private wide-eyed with his beak hanging open. "So, what else does the magic box have to say about our newest disaster?"

Mason seemed startled at the request. "Nothing much else. Phil reads that she enjoys orange smoothies, which would be a great way to welcome her here, but seeing how you're already set on hating her and shooting nerf gun bullets while she's in the line of fire... I think our purpose is done here."

With that, the chimps turned to leave.

Skipper paused, contemplating something deeply. "She must be a spy for Blowhole! She likes orange smoothies just like that surprising soft-skinned evil dolphin!"

"Aww..." Rico whined, then continued talking in his own way. "I like orange smoothies..."

"TRAITOR!"

"Alright men, do we have any sight of the transferring spy's crate yet?"

"Not yet, Skipper," Kowalski spoke, staring through the binoculars. "Oh wait- there's Alice now...she's either carrying a transfer crate or a giant bin of the biggest taco the nearest Mexican restaurant has to offer."

"I've had one of those before...they do not settle with your stomach well AT ALL."

Rico began pointing frantically towards Alice, signaling that she was getting closer. He quickly swallowed the miscellaneous equipment they had out before the said zookeeper could notice.

Sighing in disgust, Alice dropped the crate into the habitat. From inside the wooden box, a voice could be heard grumbling uncomprehendable words and phrases.

The penguin quartet leader shoved Private forward. "Go do your thing."

The young bird was confused. "What thing, Skippah'?"

"You know..." Skipper began waving his flippers around, trying to find the right words, "...your 'cute' thing. Introduce yourself. 'Ello, my name's Private. I have a fake British accent. What's your name? I'm extremely adorable, so there's no reason to be frightened around me or my friends. Want a hug?' Something like that."

Private frowned. "That's not very nice."

"Well, you are nice. So...go make friends to the spy."

"You know, I may not be able to hear what you all are saying, but it would be really great if you could stop chatting and get me out of here."

"Oh. Right," Private grabbed the crowbar Rico conveniently hacked up for doing the job.

After a few pulls the crate popped open. "Thank goodness, the air in there was getting stuffy."

Out stepped a penguin. Female, as the chimps had read. Feathers the color of autumn leaves and eyes that sparkled like stars at midnight. She was stunning, with beautiful curves and a coat of feathers that glistened in the warm sunlight.

Kidding.

Out had stepped a female penguin that was not stunning, nor had the sparkling eyes, glistening feathers or beautiful curves. No, she was simple: built the way all the others were, but was a bit shorter than Rico, and skinner. Simple, hardly a curve, blue-grey eyes like the rest, and the same black feathers. Not ugly, not gorgeous. Just...simple.

"Hi, my name's-"

"Lillian! Is that you?"

So, please review! I want to know how I did. Constuctive criticism is very helpful, though PLEASE no flames. I know this idea has been done before, but I plan to make mine different, perhaps in more ways than one. Thanks!