Gravity Row

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Our parents want us dead. Thought Dipper Pines to himself. This was the only logical conclusion he could come to about why his parents sent him and Mabel to live with their Grunkle Stan in Stilwater...who also works as a low-level "cleaner" for the infamous Saints Row gang.

Dipper shuddered. How was it possible to kill so many people in one day? He thought as memories of all truckloads of horribly mangled corpses that were sent to Stan daily to 'process'(which really just meant looting every orifice for valuables and throwing them in the incinerator). Seriously, some days their were enough corpses to fill a small country! How was this town not already a depopulated ghost town?!

The only good thing was that Stans low-level job made sure that they were far away from the apparently daily carnage that took place in the town or anyone high-ranking in the Saints...so of course-

…...

WERE GOING TO THE BOSS'S MANSION!?

Screamed both twins in horror. Stan smiled. "Isn't great!? Apparently all the cleaners above me tried to sell out the Boss to a rival gang! He killed the lot of them and now his mansion is a mess! HA! I'm moving on to the big leagues now!"

The twins just remained deathly pale. "Uh...Grunkle Stan?...Not that that doesn't sound great...But why are you bringing me and Mabel along?"

Stan rolled his eyes. "Well you don't expect an old man like me to carry around all several thousand of those corpses myself?"

Dipper looked at him incredulous. "Are you seriously- Were just kids! What about child safety laws?"

Stan chuckles as he ruffles Dippers hair. "It's cute you believe those still exists kid"...

…...

And that's how Dipper found himself moping up bloody entrails, and pulling shrapnel out of the walls.

Dipper vomited into his bucket at the sight of yet another corpse that had been clearly desecrated by the saints.

Well at least all the Saints are away in business. Thinks Dipper to himself as he moves on to what appeard to be a bathroom. Yeah, Dipper. All the homicidal maniacs are nowhere near here. Thinks Dipper to himself in an attempt to reassure himself. Right, just clean this up as fast as possible and leave before they get back...then later tonight...Let's be honest this whole things been a nightmare, it's time to go. Just take Mabel and run as far away from this cursed town-

That's when he heard the cough. Broken free from his inner thoughts, he turned around. The first thing he saw was the Saints Row tattoo that marked a person as a member...then he saw the teenage redhead girl who it was attached to...what he didn't see was her clothes...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!

AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't.

But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?

Love me, flame me, review me