Funny Bleach Episode 15: I Will Never Be Your Girl

[It`s another beautiful day. The birds are singing peacefully just like any other morning]

[Rukia is sitting on the couch in her room chatting on her laptop with Yoruichi and Rangiku]

Rukia: (Is typing) Hey girls. Wassup.

Yoruichi: (Is with Rangiku in her room) Hey Rangiku I got this great idea on how we can get Rukia a boyfriend.

Rangiku: Really? Tell me tell me.

Yoruichi: How about we hook her up with Renji. We tell them that they both want to meet and so on.

Rangiku: That is like soo perfect. Tell her.

Yoruichi: (Is typing) Hey Rukia, are you interessted in meeting a good friend of mine? He`s a guy and he really wants to meet you. (Starts gigling as she`s typing)

Rukia: (Types) Sure. Bring him in.

[Yoruichi invited Dark_Lord94 to the conversation]

Dark_Lord94: Hello there Ice Princess.

Yoruichi: I`ll let you two get to know eachother better. Bye (Left the conversation)

Dark_Lord94: Well she sure left in a hurry, huh?

Ice Princess: Yeah. Lol. She told me you really wanted to meet me.

Dark_Lord94: She told me you wanted to meet me too. I guess she played us. Haha.

Ice Princess: Yeah. So tell me a bit about yourself.

Dark_Lord94: Well there`s not much to tell really. I`m sexy as hell, I can tell you that. Lol. I have long red hair I`m tall and very brave. Now you.

Ice Princess: I`m pretty as hell not to mention cute, also sweet and naughty. Lol. I have short black hair, I`m short and I`m also very brave.

Dark_Lord94: Well that is awesome. You really are a perfect match for me. Hehe.

Ice Princess: You too.

[Later around midnight]

Yoruichi: Are they still chatting? (Yawns)

Rangiku: Must be. She hasn`t left her room not even once. I think she`s really into him. (Grins)

Yoruichi: If only she knew who he really was. Let`s leave her alone and go to sleep.

Ice Princess: Wow, I didn`t realize how late it was getting. I g2g to bed. Lol.

Dark_Lord94: Yeah, me too. Hey listen, you wanna meet sometime? `Cause I really want to see you.

Ice Princess: Me too. How about we meet at the park?

Dark_Lord94: You want to meet there? Alright, see you there at..hm...10am?

Ice Princess: Sure. See ya.

Dark_Lord94: Bye hun.

Ice Princess: Bye sweetie.

[They both sign out]

[The next morning]

[Renji is running by]

Ichigo: Hey dude, where are you going?

Renji: I met the most amazing girl online yesterday and we are gonna meet right now at the park. Later. (Runs off)

Ichigo: What he say?

[Rukia is also running]

Yoruichi: And where do you think you`re going?

Rukia: I`m gonna go meet the man of my dreams at the park right now. See ya. (Runs off)

Rangiku: You better hide. She`s gonna kill you for this.

Yoruichi: I doubt it. She is gonna thank me. (Crossed arms looks confident)

Rangiku: We`ll just see. (Grins)

[At the park]

Renji: (Is at the place where they were going to meet and then sees her) Hm. (Reads a piece of paper where he wrote what she was gonna be wearing and recognizes her: Hey beautiful, I got you these flowers.

Rukia: (Turns around) Oh thank you handsome...Renji?

Renji: Rukia? What are you doing here?

Rukia: What do you mean what am I doing here, what are you doing here? I have to meet someone.

Renji: Me too...You`re not Ice Princess...are you, sweetheart?

Rukia: And you`re not Dark_Lord94...are you?

Renji: Yeah I am. I guess Yoruichi tried to hook us up. Haha. How sweet of her. She thinks we got a chance. Haha...Rukia? You okay?

Rukia: ...I`m gonna kill her! (Runs back to Soul Society)

Renji: Oh dear, this is not good. (Runs after Rukia) Rukia wait. Come back.

[At Soul Society]

(Yoruichi and Rangiku hear someone`s voice from afar) I`m gonna kill her!

Rangiku: There you have it. Well it was nice knowing ya. Really nice. Now RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!

Yoruichi: Are you kidding me? I`m not gonna run.

Rangiku: You have to. Your life depends on it. But if you`re not gonna move then I will. (Backs away and hides) I know that tone of voice and trust me, it`s not friendly.

[Rukia runs towards Yoruichi. She grabs her by her neck and pins her against the wall while choking her*]

Yoruichi: (Is barely able to speak) Ru..kia. You`re choking...argh...me!

Rukia: Give me a reason not to.

Rangiku: Look, at least give her a chance to explain why she did that before you choke her to death!

Rukia: (Slowly stops choking her but doesn`t let go) Fine. Speak! Quikly!

Yoruichi: I only did that because I know deep down you love Renji and maybe you are too blind to see that Renji loves you.

Renji: I do?

Yoruichi: Yes. You`re just affraid of how she might react.

Rangiku: Can you blame him?

Rukia: What are you trying to say? That I love him? I don`t.

Yoruichi: Yes you do. You`re just too stuborn to admit that you love him.

Rukia: (Starts choking her even harder again but slowly) I don`t. Don`t assume you know me and what I`m feeling.

Yoruichi: Aah. Then tell me this. Why don`t you love him?

Rukia: (Her angry face slowly disappears and looks confused) Because...I don`t want to. (Gets angry again) But you still had no right to do that.

Yoruichi: I`m sorry if that upset you. I just thought you could`ve understand my purpose as to why I did that. But I guess I was wrong.

Rukia: (lets go of her) Look i`m sorry for what I just did to you, but I do understand. You wanted me to find my true love. But I think it`s best if I find it on my own.

Yoruichi: Okay.

[They both hug each other]

Rukia: I don`t know what got over me. I just never liked those sorta things. (Looks at Renji) Renji I am sorry for treating you badly these days. You just wanted to show me how you truly felt about me and I was so damn blind to even see it. Can you ever forgive me?

Renji: Sure. But I just want you to know that I`ll always care for you. And I hope that when the time is right, you`ll see me as more than just a friend.

Rukia: Hmm...I don`t think that`s gonna happen.

Renji Oh. (Looks sad)

Rukia: At least, not anytime soon. I was hoping we could just be friends for now.

Renji: Yeah, sure. (Smiles) You bet. Well I guess I`ll see you around then. Later. (Walks to his room)

Rangiku: (With tears falling from her eyes) That was so sad. Poor Renji.

Yoruichi: Yeah. I guess Rukia needs some time to think. Let`s go.

Rukia: (Looks at the sky) I hope I made the right decision...

The End