An Unusual Circumstance
By: Chubby-King-Chocobo
Synopsis: Police Officer Yuu Kanda was tired, hungry, and irritable. His shift was over but he couldn't go home yet, just because there was a little liar named Allen Walker handcuffed across the table from him and a fresh dead body being examined two floors down.
Doesn't feel like sleeping or continuing a WIP, so I decided to do a quick one DGM one-shot—that turned into a multi-chapter because it was taking waaaay to long to write and I've been itching to post.
Warning: Run-on sentences, grammar that would make any self respecting writer cringe, potential violence and gore, language—a lot of language. This first half was written because I was in an extremely pissy mood and Kanda on perpetual PMS is a good stress relief…har.
If there were two things that Kanda hated in the world, it was liars, jokers, and waiting for the lazy ass fuckers in the lab division to hurry up and give back the results on the DNA evidence his unit submitted Two. Fucking. Hours. Ago.
Okay, fine, that was three things but no one gives a damn as it has been three hours since midnight when the call came in, two and a half since they arrived at the bloody crime scene arresting the suspect, two hours since the arrested suspect was taken to the interrogation room…and since then the little fucker Hasn't. Stopped. Smiling.
Kanda's lips curled into a small snarl as he leaned back into the cheap fold-able chair, metal of course, wordlessly watching the murder suspect who sat in an identical chair across from him. On the other side of the heavy wooden table, the little fucker met his eyes and smiled a little wider.
Name: Allen Walker, Age: Fifteen, Hair: White, Eyes: Gray. Birthplace: England, moved to the States a year ago. No previous criminal record according to their database, though there was mention of extraneous unpaid debts. His pockets were clean when they pat-searched him, the only thing on his person being a crucifix, and he has been infuriatingly pleasant during the arrest and after, minus the mild protest of "It's not what it looks like,"—like Kanda hasn't heard that one before. All in all, Fifteen years old Allen Walker would have passed as an unfortunate kid that was in the wrong place at the wrong time if it wasn't for the fact that he had copious amounts of the vic's blood splattered on the front of his coat (taken in as evidence for testing) and was the only person near the abandoned parking lot that was seen by nearby surveillance cameras. Besides, what honest teenager would be wandering around in a sketchy neighborhood after curfew?
Despite all these suspicious circumstances around him, Allen Walker continued to insist that he was innocence while politely answering Kanda question's—for the first five minutes, then the 'politeness' nearly vanished and tinged with poorly disguised sarcasm. Now the little shit was smiling at him just to piss him off, and damn it to hell, he was doing a fantastic job. Kanda would have been impressed that the alleged killer could sustain that shit eating grin for so long if he wasn't too busy trying to suppress the urge to bash that pretty little face in with his chair.
It wasn't just the smile that got on Kanda's nerves. Oh no, that was the least of it. There was something was amazingly off about this kid that rang warning sirens in Kanda's head, and Kanda trusted his instincts. Yes the pagan cult-like tattoo on his face and the demonic looking red arm set startling alarms of its own, but the way Walker was quietly hovering over the dismembered body when they first found him and then let himself be arrested, looking like he did nothing wrong-while blood that obviously wasn't his own trailed on the floor-made the kid far more dangerous than any deranged serial killer in Kanda's book.
The fact that Lavi, his partner, was wary of the pipsqueak—even if the retarded rabbit was all friendly smiles on the outside—solidified Kanda's suspicions. There was no one in the precinct that could read a person with just a glance and a half-smile like Lavi, and that Lavi wasn't giving the kid any sort of green light. Instead there was a hard glint in one green eye and volunteers to run evidence down to the crime lab, as well as a revisit to the crime scene to find more on the way back. One more useful thing about Lavi Kanda would never admit out loud: There was no one like Lavi who could find hidden evidence. He was a genius in a fool's guise, lax and making stupid jokes on the outside but could retrace the steps of a criminal in a crime scene with near perfect accuracy.
Now if that said stupid-genius would get his ass over here with the DNA results and hopefully more incriminating evidence, Kanda could throw this fucker in jail and call it a night, never seeing his smiling mug again until the far off court date.
"I know I am probably falling on deaf ears now, Officer, but I wasn't the one who killed that man." Walker stated, both hands visibly on the table. Kanda spared him a glance and tisked .
"If you know, then why bother talking," a deliberate pause "—Bean sprout." Walker's smile twitched, and yes Kanda got immense satisfaction out of that. As much as the kid's stretched face irked Kanda, Kanda found early on that calling him 'bean sprout' did the same. So what if he was petty? Kanda never claimed to be a righteous man. "You've been sprouting random bullshit about what you saw, and you haven't said anything about an alternative suspect, so forgive me if I don't believe a damn word you say."
Walker rolled his eyes, and the fucker didn't bother hiding it.
"I've told you, the one who killed him was an Akuma." This argument again. Kanda didn't know what was worse, the fact the Bean sprout was crazy enough to expect Kanda to believe him, or the fact he spoke slowly to Kanda enunciating every word with that stupid accent of his like the older man was an uncomprehending invalid. God forbid.
"Evil ghost spirits don't exist. Retarded bean sprout children shouldn't stay up watching bad late night horror channels, they'll start mimicking them."
"They are real!"
"Uh-huh. Along with the Hobgoblin, Easter Bunny, and the Tooth fairy. Try again, Bean sprout." No matter how insistent the kid was going to be, Kanda wasn't about to humor him.
"My name is Allen, and if your bigoted brain can conceive for just one moment—"
"So what, you're saying they exist?"
"Yes!"
"The Tooth fairy. Really?"
"No! The Akuma!" The kid looked like he was about to explode from exasperation.
"How that fuck is that different from saying the Tooth fairy exists?"
"Would you stop being so obstinate for one second and listen to me, Officer Bakanda!" There was suddenly the intrusive sound of the metal chair scraping against the floor and the resonating sound of the safety of a gun being clicked off. Specifically, Kanda's.
"Say. That. Again, Bean sprout." Kanda could see Walker's adam's apple bob up and down as wide gray eyes stared up at the lengthy barrel of his Glock 34, Mugen2. Not exactly the state issued 27, but he liked the larger 34 better, and intimida-cleared it with the sergeant.
Kanda was damn pleased to see that fake smile wiped of the snarky shit's ashen face and replaced with a small panic, but Kanda wasn't about to let up until the little fucker begged for forgiveness. Much to his surprised, the Bean sprout didn't cower, but his panic dissolved into a hardened calm. Oh this little bitch was certain he wouldn't pull the trigger—
"You won't pull the trigger, Officer Bakanda."—and damn that the twitch in his hand didn't accidentally pull the trigger. "Rather you can't. I am your only witness and lead to the case." He looked so damn sure of himself as he stared straight passed the black abysmal hole of the barrel into a different black abyss.
"Who says I am not about to do the public a service by getting rid of the deranged murder?" Kanda growled in challenge.
Gray eyes narrowed and Kanda swore it glinted silver in the florescent light as the boy slowly and deliberately moved to stand up from his seat. Kanda made sure to keep the barrel aligned between Allen's eyes the whole time.
Defiant gray stared unwavering at sinister black in a battle of wills, neither willing to blink or back down, malicious intent rolling off them in near-corporal waves. Oh this little shit was going down.
"I'd rather appreciate it if you didn't turn this into another murder scene, Yuu." Kanda startled a bit, not having heard the door open, but didn't bother turning around. He knew the owner of the voice, and more importantly Kanda knew the only person with enough gall to call him by his first name and agile enough to live to do it again. Kanda 'tsk'ed,' putting his gun back into its place on the leg strap, and turned to his partner.
"About time you got back. And I told you not to call me that."
Lavi was leaning coolly against the open door frame, papers tucked neatly under his arm. The long haired officer's frowned deepened when he saw the look on Lavi's face. His one visible green eye was hard, and there was a rare tautness to his face despite his signature lazy smile.
"Sorry to interrupt your lively discussion, Mr. Walker, but I am afraid I am going to have to steal your charming company away for a moment."
"Oh no, it'll be my pleasure, Office Bookman. I assure you. And please call me Allen."
"Allen then. And please call me Lavi; Bookman is the old panda down in forensics." Lavi one-eye-winked as he ushered the glaring Kanda through the door. Out of the corner of his eye, Kanda saw the kid return the smile.
Once the door soundly clicked behind them, Lavi's smile dropped.
"What do you have for me?" A paper clipped report was promptly thrust in front of him.
"This is the DNA result on the kid's coat." Kanda glanced from the paper to his partner, waiting. "It matched the vic's." Knew it, Kanda handed the papers back to Lavi, that's all he wanted to know. Bookman Jr. shook his head, signaling him to keep it. That was a first, and it set the shorter officer on edge. Lavi now had his full attention.
"The vic was already moved down to the Old Panda's in the basement. I convinced Gramps to take me through the autopsy with him…" Lavi let out a long exhale, trailing a hand down his tired face. That was the first time Kanda noticed how worn his partner looked. When Lavi finally took his hand away from his face, he gave Kanda a wary grin. "Nothing we found made sense."
Kanda narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "What do you mean?"
Lavi just gestured back to the report in Kanda's hand. Such a fucking waste of time, Kanda thought irritably as he quickly scanned through the papers for wanted information. As he flipped furiously from page to page, his hands got slower until it reached a gradual stop.
….what in the world-?
The former coroner-in-training must have noticed his expression.
"Yeah, like I said, nothing made sense." Kanda glared, but Lavi ignored it, choosing instead to rest his eye, reciting key points of the whole report by memory. "Deceased name was Suman Dark, age 33, his residence is registered in Virginia. A missing report was filed for him by his wife five days ago, last seen heading out to work. According to the autopsy, Suman Dark has been dead for five days. M.O.D –unknown, but approximately four hours ago, examination suggests that an explosion in his torso caused the open wound, postmortem." Lavi opened his eye to meet Kanda's blank stare, his previous grin twisting into something more sardonic. "That's what's being written officially, but fuck, Kanda, there wasn't any trace of gunpowder! It's like something the size of a watermelon violently exploded out of his stomach, leaving all of his mangled insides exposed for the world to see!"
Kanda's sleep deprived mind refused to go any faster than 5 miles below snail-pace, but he could comprehend that what he read and what Lavi said was un-fucking-believable. He saw the surveillance tapes. Suman Dark was walking around just fine over 4 hours ago.
"You're not making this shit up."
Lavi glared back at him, all humor leaving his composure. "I couldn't even make this shit up if I tried." And Kanda believed him, as freakishly bizarre as the case was turning out to be. All it meant was that something was seriously up.
"Our vic has been missing and dead for five days, suddenly appearing here, halfway across the country, most certainly dead, with something recently exploded out of his stomach…" The long haired man summarized, as if speaking them aloud would help process them. "And our only witness is a half-crazed Bean sprout…any possible involvement of weapons?"
"Nope. No gun powder, and no sign of a weapon—which reminds me. Flip to the last page." Kanda did. "I also had the CSI Lab conduct a quick ballistic experiment for me. The force from the expulsion of whatever came out of Suman's body and the blood spatter pattern on Allen's coat is constant."
Black eyes narrowed at the implications "Our suspect was there when it happened."
"Yep."
The bean sprout kid was definitely the key to solving what happened in this case, and as Kanda's brain mulled over the 'bullshit' the kid had been saying for the last two hours, the more credible it sounded. The white haired kid's explanation did coincide with their recent findings…Akuma, huh?
Tsk. Not likely.
"Let's go back and get the little fucker to tell us what really happened." The kid held the trick to the murder and the 'walking dead' and Kanda was sure as hell, going to make that lying little punk confess his gut out.
"God, this is like something straight out of X-files!" The taller officer suddenly exclaimed.
As they both turned heels, heading towards the door, Kanda couldn't tell if his idiot partner was disturbed by the case's developments or excited by them.
"Hey Yuu, can I call you Scully?"
"No."
A/N: Urg. I usually don't approve of such short chapters, but like I said, I've been itching to post. It's been years.
SORRY ABOUT THE SWISS CHEESE PLOT LINE. Among many other things. (For those who don't know me, I have a chronic need to apologize). By the way, I don't have much background in Law Enforcement, Forensics, or any of that jazz. The details I come up with is mainly based on my observations, muse, and a little bit of what CSI: Los Vegas episodes my old roommate showed me. I am sure you people might have a few questions, but I am hoping most will be answered in the next chapter.
What Kanda did, switching guns he carries with him on duty, I think would TOTALLY. NOT. FLY. So, if you go into law enforcement, I wouldn't suggest trying it unless you have a VALID reason. In Kanda's case with 'Mugen2', it's more of his obstinacy. I really do love him for it…though I feel like he gets away with a lot of things he shouldn't in my story.
Why is Kanda's gun dubbed 'Mugen2' you ask? I think you guys guessed it already. Considering Kanda's imposed Japanese background, I think it's appropriate that he would have the sword 'Mugen'—whether it be something he obtained on his own or a family heirloom is up to you.