Darkness.
The ubiquitous darkness reigned supreme in the room where there was a black-haired figure. A woman. She sat on a chair, alone, and blankly stared in the mirror - although she could not see her reflection.
Only emptiness.
Her brown eyes were empty and she knew it - even if she did not see anything.
A glass was in her hand, but inside there was no wine; a mysterious, green smoke could not be a part of any drink. It was a potion.
The woman put the glass to her lips.
One sip.
One sip was enough to make a grimace appear on her face. She really hated the taste of that drink. However, she took another sip and then another. She must drink it, even if it was horrible.
"Daddy!" she called. Her voice, although still majestic, was nothing like it used to be; the voice was nothing like her usual 'Evil Queen' one. There was no threat anymore.
Silence answered her, before she heard the sound of footsteps and the door opened quietly. An almost bald, elderly man entered the room. He walked toward her chair and then bowed deeply, lowering his head. He did not dare to look at his interlocutor.
"How can I serve you, Your Majesty?"
The Queen sat without a word, still staring into the mirror. She had in her mind a real war of thoughts. She had to rethink everything thoroughly. What if this was a whim and destroyed everything she planned? Although now there was nothing that could be destroyed, she thought, clenching her hand on the glass. Everything was already gone and there was only one way to fix it.
"Bring me the parchment," she said, handing him the glass.
Her father said nothing, just bowed once more and excused himself.
A moment later the woman was alone in the room.
Again.
The next morning the whole Enchanted Forest was buzzing with rumors. Yesterday evening many prisoners had been released from prison, and hundreds of Black Knights had left the Dark Palace, going to the four corners of the realm to communicate to everyone the royal message. Snow White was no longer a wanted bandit and the Queen had invited her back to the castle.
Nobody knew what to think.
Some people thought that the clemency was a trick to kill the princess, but others argued that it could not be true, otherwise the Queen would not relieve so many people. In the end – as someone calculated – she released all her prisoners.
The most confused was the person involved in this situation.
Snow White was harshly awakened by her friend – Red – who was screaming something about the trap. At the beginning, she had no idea what the girl was talking about, but when she repeated everything, she thought the same.
She wanted to believe that her step-mother was still a good person, but the suddenly change of heart was highly suspicious. However, deep in her heart the princess wished it was the truth, much to Red's and Red's grandmother's dismay.
Her friend had a hard time trying to convince her that they should run away to the other realm. When Snow finally agreed, it was too late.
The girls were about to leave the village, but before they had a chance, they were stopped.
The royal procession entered the village, while making a lot of confusion. Many people were curious – yet terrified – what would happen, soon, especially since in the middle of procession was a royal carriage. The one the Queen always used. But the woman never appeared.
Instead, the Black Knights stopped in front of the very scared and surprised girl. One of them dismounted and walked toward her. Snow blinked, exchanging glances with her friend, when the knight bowed in front of her. Then, he took off his helmet as she recognized him.
The huntsman.
That was the man who had been willing to sacrifice his life for her.
"We are here to read the royal ordinance," he said audibly to all present people and then took the parchment from another knight. The huntsman took a deep breath and began to read. "We, Regina, the Queen of the Enchanted Forest, declare that all allegations in relation to Snow White are dismissed. We also reinstate her title of Princess and her place as the rightful successor to the throne of the kingdom. From this day forth, anyone who will raise their hand against Her Highness will be charged with high treason and sentenced to death."
When the man stopped reading, the former bandit was not the only one standing with an open mouth. Nobody knew what kind of weird game the Queen was playing at.
"Her Majesty awaits you in the palace," he said, tucking the parchment. "You may, however, refuse, and she will not draw any consequences because of that. Notwithstanding, if you agree, Your Highness, the Queen also invites your friend and her grandmother," he finished, pointing at Red and her grandmother, Widow Lucas, who stood not so far behind them.
The girl blinked.
Once.
Twice.
Several times.
Snow tried to understand what the man just said, but she could not. It was all too confusing. What happened to Regina? Why she changed so suddenly? What was she planning? Will she murder her as soon as she appears in palace? Or maybe, as her heart was telling her, she really did change? The princess had no idea, but she really wanted to believe that her step-mother may be good again.
She had waited so long to see the woman again without fear of being killed.
"May we talk alone, please?" she asked and the man nodded.
They entered the small cottage, being carefully observed by all people – especially by Red and Red's grandmother – but she did not pay any attention to that. She had far more important things in her head.
"What kind of game is that?"
The huntsman looked at her and slightly shook his head.
"It's not the game. The Queen has really changed."
"And I'm supposed to believe that?" she asked skeptically, although her heart started jumping. There was a chance! "After everything she did to me?"
"The Queen is a very complicated woman," he started quietly. "And it is your choice if you're going to believe her, Your Highness."
Snow frowned. He was not helping.
"What did she do to you when you returned to the castle without my heart?" the girl was almost sure that she knew the answer, but she had to ask anyway. It was the only way to learn the truth.
"She took mine instead," he said, and seeing that she was opening her mouth, he added. "But she promised to give it back."
"She promised to give it back?" Right now, the princess was really shocked. She was ready to hear everything, but this. She heard stories. She knew that once the Evil Queen took the heart, she kept it forever. Maybe Regina is really back? she thought for a brief moment.
"Yes," he answered, nodding. "She promised to give it back as soon as I bring you home. And I believe that she will do it. She has changed."
Snow knew that her friend would hate her for this, but his words helped her to make her decision. She will return with the Black Knights to the castle. She owned that to the huntsman. He sacrificed his life for her. Now it was her turn to pay it back.
In the end, the worst that could happen was her death.
Regina kept her word; as soon as the royal procession returned to the castle, the Queen summoned the man and gave him his heart back. And then without even looking at him she dismissed him, because she wanted to be left alone in her bedchamber. She had to save her energy for the confrontation with Snow,
Because once Snow White was back, everything would change.
And speaking of her step-daughter…
As soon as the princess returned to home, the maids took her and her guests (Red and Widow Lucas would never let her go alone) to their room and prepared something warm to eat for them.
But once the dinner was over, the former bandit wished to see the Queen.
They met in the garden, in the company of Snow's allies. Regina was alone, because she dismissed guards who escorted the three women, as if she wanted to show that she was not interested in killing them.
In fact she was not interested in anything at all and looked at them only because she had to.
"Why?" It was the first thing the princess asked, as soon as she saw her step-mother. The woman only raised her eyebrow. "Why did you do this?"
"Because."
"Because?" Snow snorted loudly. She felt many emotions. She was happy, sad and angry at the same time. She was happy to see the Queen again, but also she could not forget what happened between them. Snow needed answers and all she got was 'because'. It was not enough for her. "After all this time all you have to say is 'because'? Are you insane?"
"Are you really asking me about the level of insanity, dear?" the woman was clearly amused, not paying any attention to the two other guests. "We both know I lost my common sense a long time ago, when your father was still alive."
There was a moment of silence during with the Queen started to picking up the apples again. Snow was watching her carefully, as if analyzing her behaviour. In the meantime Red and Granny left them alone - yet they were close enough to keep an eye on the Queen - since Snow asked them to do it. She had to be with her step-mother alone, at least for a while.
"I started returning the hearts recently," Regina started suddenly, making Snow jump. "I know it won't change anything, but I thought it would be a good start."
"It is." That was all what her step-daughter said, since she was too shocked to say anything else.
The Queen nodded.
"I know you don't believe me, and I don't expect you to do so," the woman started, still not looking at her guest. "And I won't tell you what happened, not now anyway, but I want you to know that I regret everything I've done. I should never have blamed you for what happened."
"What do you mean?"
"When you were a child, I told you that Daniel ran away," her voice was quiet, uncertain. Snow frowned, when she heard it. "But it was a lie. I lied because I didn't want you to know that my mother ripped his heart out and crushed it in front of me."
She did not have to look at her to know that Snow paled. The princess did not expect to hear such confession. However, it was not over.
"I know you didn't mean to get him killed, when you told everything to my mother, but I wasn't strong enough to blame her for this," the Queen continued. "You were an easiest target. A young, spoiled princess who has everything what she wants."
"I'm sorry."
"You're not the one who should be sorry, dear," Regina finally turned to her step-daughter, handing her the apple. "I know you loved my apples when you were younger. And the fairest of them all deserves the prettiest apple."
Snow blinked, accepting the fruit. She had no idea what this all meant, but before she had a chance to say something, the Queen turned on her heel once again.
"I'm sure you must be tired, my dear," the woman started. "You should take rest."
The princess knew that it was the end of conversation and she was dismissed. She still had a lot of questions, but she did not want to push her luck. There is still time to receive the answers, she thought as she went to join her companions, who were on the other side of the garden, and together they went to the castle, leaving Regina behind.
Little did Snow know was that she was not talking with the real Queen.
A lot happened over the next few months. Regina and Snow tried to fix their relationship - or rather Snow tried and Regina deftly avoided answering questions, always having apples at hand. She knew that as a child, Snow was addicted to them, and it seemed that old habits die hard - and reconcile their kingdom.
Some people were still wary. The Queen must have some secret plan, they thought.
But the truth was the only plan Regina had was to prepare Snow to be Queen, although the younger woman was not aware of that. She was just happy, having her hero back. Because Regina had indeed changed.
All the hearts were returned (if the people were alive, of course), all political prisoners were released and also the villages which the woman destroyed were rebuilt. She could not bring the dead people back, but she really tried to change. And people began to see this.
However, no one had seen her for a very long time.
The last time the Queen had left the palace was almost a year ago, a month before she decided to bring back the princess. The only people who saw the woman were the people who lived in the castle.
Even other monarchs did not see her. Snow White was representing her step-mother in all official meetings. However, no one commented on this unexpected behaviour, because they still were afraid of her. But it all was about to change, soon, because today, there was a ball in the Dark Palace.
All invited guests showed up that evening. They came mainly because everyone wanted to know what caused the sudden change in the Queen. However, the woman was too busy watching the princess than attending to anything else.
She sat at a table, watching as Snow danced with some young prince. His name was James, as far as she remembered, but honestly it did not interest her much. She was so tired and all she wanted was go to bed. However, before she had a chance to get up, someone sat next to her.
"What's going on in this game?"
Slowly, she turned her head and looked at her interlocutor. King George was looking at her curiously.
"I'm not playing a game," she answered simply, and once again looked at her step-daughter. "I have no idea what you are talking about."
"You know very well what I mean, Regina," the man pointed at the princess. "You wanted to kill her for so long and now suddenly you decided you don't want to do it anymore? That's a lie. You're up to something."
"Sadly, I have to disappoint you, George; I'm not up to anything," she said as she took glass of wine from the table. "I just want my kingdom to have a good ruler when I'm gone."
That made the King look at her, confused.
"What do you mean?"
"Everyone will die at some point," she started with a small smile. "And as you know, I don't have children of my own, like you. And Snow was always first in the line to take throne once I'm gone."
And with that the woman got up from her place, leaving the room without looking at anyone. She did not have energy to be with them any longer.
In the meantime a very confused George blinked several times, and the princess found her friend, Red, in the crowd, exchanging glances. It was very weird behaviour, even for Regina.
The next morning Regina did not appear at the royal breakfast, much to everyone's surprise. She was the host of the party and yet, she was barely present. Her father informed them that the Queen did not feel well, but wished them all a good day and a good breakfast.
So they started their meal.
After breakfast they were supposed to go to the royal gardens. But before they had a chance to finish their meal, the maid arrived with a letter. To Snow.
A very confused princess took it from her and opened it. She had no idea who could send her a letter, especially since all royals were here.
Except one.
The letter was from Regina.
Dear Snow,
Writing this letter comes to me with difficulty. You know very well that showing emotions has never been my strongest feature, as well as admitting a mistake. However, there is always a moment in which you have to swallow your pride. Right now it is my time.
Snow, I write this letter to you because I do not have the courage to say this to you in person.
I am sorry. I am sorry for killing your father and for ruining your life. I am sorry for the infliction of harm to people. I am sorry that I was not strong enough to stand up to hatred and for learning dark magic. I should never have done it. I am sorry I did not know this before.
I own you an explanation. When you came back to the castle, I said that it was not the time. Now is the right time. As you know, Rumplestiltskin taught me dark magic. He promised me that I would not turn into my mother, but he lied. And yet, despite this, I studied further. I thought that the destruction of your happiness was the most important thing to me, but I was wrong.
The Dark One once told me what I should do to finally have my revenge. Apparently, there is a curse that will take everyone to a Land Without Magic. He wanted me to cast it, but… the price was too high.
To cast the curse he wanted me to crush the heart of the thing I love the most.
Snow, you know that I do not know how to love very well. You know that I was not the best mother in the world, and that I could not love you as you deserved. But you know that my father is the only person I love with all my heart. Choosing my father over revenge was an easy choice. But Rumplestiltskin did not like my answer.
He was mad that I decided to quit his lessons. He was mad that I dared to ruin his plans (whatever plans he had. I never asked about it), and so he cursed me to lose everything.
Because nothing hurts as much as losing everything when you are powerful.
Dear Snow. This letter is my farewell. When you read it, I am already dead.
I want to die on my own terms. I want to die with dignity. I do not want to give the Dark One the satisfaction. He will not turn me into nothing.
Snow. I have one final request, although I know I do not deserve this. But please, bury me with Daniel. We could not be together in life, so at least after death, I would like to be close to him.
Dear Snow. I am really sorry for everything. If I could turn back time I would do so. But I cannot.
Goodbye, my little spoiled princess, you are going to be a great Queen,
Regina.
As soon as she finished the letter, the princess got up from her place, and without any word she left the room, leaving the paper on the table. But she did not care about it now. She had to find Regina. She had to find her step-mother. Because it was a lie. She lied in the letter and she would not believe otherwise.
But when she found herself in the Queen's bedchamber, it was too late. The Queen was already gone, an empty phial in her hand.
Prince Henry slowly marched through the corridors of the castle, carrying in his hand a glass with a mysterious drink. Two months had passed since the coronation of the new Queen, but he still lived in the castle, because Snow asked him to stay with her. In the end he was her step-grandfather and also the only one person who reminded her of Regina.
Snow painfully experienced the death of her step-mother. She had just regained her, and now she had to say goodbye to her. And she could not believe it.
However, little did she know was that the Queen was not dead.
The man stopped in front of the wooden door and knocked. When he heard a quiet voice, he entered the room.
He was welcomed by darkness.
"I brought you your potion," he said quietly and walked toward the chair, where sat a black-haired woman. She, however, said nothing. "It will make you feel better."
"It won't," her voice was hoarse and sounded nothing like the voice of a young, only thirty-something woman.
"I know it's hard for you, Regina," the man said, handing her potion, which his daughter accepted a few moments later, "but there's nothing you can do about it."
"You don't have to remind me how much I've fallen, daddy," she said, looking at the potion. It was supposed to kill the pain at least for a while, but it did not work. "I want to be alone."
The man said nothing, just nodded and excused himself.
Once the door closed behind him, a glass hit the wall. Regina got up from her chair, but soon lost her balance, because she was too weak and fell on the floor. A cry of despair sounded throughout the room.
The letter she wrote to Snow did not tell the whole truth.
Rumplestiltskin had indeed cursed her, when she refused to study the dark magic after he told her about the curse, but she was not able kill herself. After everything she did, after all the pain she caused, she did not deserve to die with dignity. The monster like her did not deserve it.
But Snow should never know about it. Snow should never see her in such condition. It is why she conjured up her doppelganger and faked her own death.
Now when her beauty and her youth were gone, she was nothing else but an evil, horrible witch.
I would like to thank you mysterious-song for being my beta in this story.
Also, you may find me on tumblr under white-little-devil name.
