AN" This is my first Leverage story. It's an AU account of what made Eliot the way he is I hope you all like it! I own nothing just doing this for fun! Thanks to Fluer for her careful Beta and great ideas!-Meg


Eliot was in town for a job involving well-to-do cattle ranchers screwing the locals over in Adrian. After the job was finished, he decided he was evolved enough to do this.

He pulled his truck to a stop and left it running. He wanted to do this alone but the need to leave quickly necessitated him keeping the team with him. He walked across the weed-riddled graveyard to stand in front of the head stone that he'd only been to once, but the location was burned into his memory.

Hardison was the first to speak in the truck. "What the hell are we doing in Podunk still? My black ass wants to go back to civilization where it doesn't smell like cow."

"Shut the hell up," Tara said. Parker got out of the truck, walking over to where Eliot sat on top of an old tombstone staring at the headstone of a girl who would forever be seventeen.

"Who's Aubra Grace Keller." Parker asked.

"Someone I knew once."

"I gathered that much, but what's she to you?"

"A girl I went to high school with…anything else Parker?"

"No."

"Good." They sat in silence.

1993

Eliot's parents were, in their own way, gypsies. He was used to going to the ends of the earth, but Vega, Texas didn't even get a dot on the map. He walked into the tiny ancient gas station to pay for the gas that would get him the thirty mile to Amarillo to find something better to do than stare at cattle with his dad or wait for his mom's set to start at the local hole-in-the-wall bar. He set the money down on the counter, which was empty.

"Jimmy Joe Alpert I'm gonna kick your ass," a girl called out. Then he saw the pretty doll-like creature carrying 12-packs of Michelob to the freezer. He walked over to her, taking two cases from the top of her stack

"Hey, you're the new guy right? Hmmm, Kaylyn was right kinda cute…"

"Eliot Spencer and thanks, I think."

"Aubra Keller…"

"That's an odd name." He looked her over as a bright, wide smile lit her face. Curly hair black as a crow's wing was held at bay in a messy bun. A lock of hair fell across her forehead and into large robin's egg blue eyes. Her skin was flawlessly creamy and she had a kissable bow shaped mouth.

"I'm an odd girl." she replied the laughter tinged in her voice. "My mother read East of Eden and her favorite character was Abra. My dad wanted to name me Aubrey so they compromised… how you liking Vega?"

"It's different…"

"We're tiny but we have character…and are so very proud of everyone of our 938 redsidents…I'll get you your gas now, thanks for the help. My manger makes me restock even though I can't sell the crap."

"Jimmy Joe?"

"How'd you guess?"

"You're rather vocal. So you go to vega high right?"

"Yep, I'm a sophmore,"

"See you round Spence?"

"You bet Miss Aubra Keller."

--//--

"We became the kind of inseparable you only find in books and movies…until that night and it all changed for me," said Eliot, carefully staring at the ground.

Parker watched as he inhaled and closed his eyes for a moment. He always tried so hard not let it in, but in the here-and-now and in the moments between punches…in those moments where he has to think, breathe, aim, he often finds himself upside down in that old Chevy truck and she's gone and loses the constant internal struggle and the memories win.

--//--

"Come on El, this party's dead. Take me home? You okay to drive?" Aubra kissed his cheek.

"I'm only a little buzzed baby, it'll be fine." Holding her hand, he pulled her to the truck.

He took a turn a little fast, as he took his eyes off the road to look at her.

"Well, why shouldn't I wait for you? You'll only have a year left and its not like we won't be together a year from now anyway."

"You'd really stay in Vega? You're dying to go to California."

"I'd rather you be with me when I go. What's another year in Vega. You forget the cow smell after awhile."

"I'll miss the blue bonnets when we go. They don't grow in Cali…El, watch the road, baby."

He looked at the road. "You're worried for nothing Aub. I got this, 'sides I bet you could make flowers grow anywhere you want." Before he could react, he ran a red light. The last thing he remembered was headlights illuminating her face as she screamed his name then it all went black.

--//--

Back in the bright light of a Texas day, he pulled a packet of blue bonnets seeds from his pocket and nestled them near her marker. "You were right, baby, blue bonnets don't grown in California. I tried it," he whispered.

"Let's go," he barked at Parker gruffly, aiming his anger and frustration at her simply because he didn't have anything to hit. He learned long ago to control the guilu monster if he didn't he knew he was fully capable of killing someone.

When she died he took his anger out on the football field. His opponents feared him as though he were god himself. He'd unknowingly hurt more than one player. Coach Tubbs, who still taught here in Vega, had stood him in front of a heavy bag and said "Give it all you got. Each time you hit that bag name whatever you're feeling. Use it. Don't let it use you. Otherwise, it'll eat you alive."

He'd hit that bag until his knuckles bled. It was the only and one time he'd allowed himself to cry over the loss he felt.

He still felt the loss everyday. Sometimes all day, sometimes just for a spilt second. Like when he saw Michelob Light or when Kaylyn Everly called him just to check.

But he used it now; it didn't use him.

--//--

"This is wrong Parker. We can't just Google it because he would share his dark twisted shit with you."

"I wanna know what's going on. There's a story here…I've never seen him like that, Hardison." She reached over him and typed the girl's name into the browser.

"Local vega teens in severe accident, one dead." Hardison read,just as Eliot walked by. He saw her face up on the monitors in the conference room, looking lively as ever, next to a picture of the flattened pick-up. He was instantly and supremely angry.

"Really? You've really sunk this low, guys? Fine you wanna know what happened I'll tell you. I killed the girl I loved. I was a little more drunk than I'd thought and chose to drive. I looked away for a split second because she was smiling at me and I always liked her smile I looked back and I'd ran a red light. Old mrs. Donnely T-boned us and my piece of shit truck flipped four times. She died almost instantly and I walked away with just this." He pointed to the scar on his upper lip. "So now you know, Parker." he walked off, trying to get his anger in check.

Parker and Hardison sat there dumbfounded.

"Well that explains a whole helluva lot about his punch-happy ass." Hardison said.

"I feel like crap…I didn't mean I just wanted… I didn't know." Parker said.

"Well as he pointed out now ya do…wait awhile, then apologize."

Eliot sat on the roof top trying to decide if he would use it this time or let it eat him for just a bit. Doing so, made him more reckless but sometimes… he needed to feel and name the feelings before he remembered how to use them. He knew Aubra would tell him to quit moping and get on with it and get a haircut while he was at it. But he could never quite do it because blue bonnets didn't grow in California.