For those of you who read my last SH22 story, this is not exactly a sequel, its just a random idea that popped into my head while I was watching Hitchhikers' Guide yesterday. As with the last story, Lestrade is the narrator. Please be sure to review and tell me what you think!

Disclaimer: I don't own SH22 or any of the characters. So don't sue me! All I have is a copy of The Annotated Sherlock Holmes and a stuffed moose named Penelope

World Domination for Dummies

Chapter 1: The Stakeout

"This is, without a doubt, the worst idea you've ever had, Holmes."

"Oh do stop complaining, Lestrade. Our position is perfect."

We were crouched behind a pile of rubble at a small shuttle station in the heart of New London. The station's purpose was to provide an emergency resting place for craft headed to the Moon and beyond, and was rarely used.

"I fail to see how sitting on the freezing ground in this zedded place with my ionizer pointed at nothing is going to solve the case."

"Have patience, Lestrade." Holmes was scanning the sky, his keen eyes narrowed in concentration. I repositioned myself so that a bit of disassembled space ship no longer dug into my side and turned my gaze towards the sky.

"What exactly are we looking for?"

"That!" Holmes exclaimed, pointing to a small silver craft that was flying low over the buildings. It landed smoothly on the runway, and I prepared for action, raising my ionizer.

"Wait," Holmes commaned, placing a hand on my arm.

"More waiting?" I groaned inwardly. What on earth are we waiting for?

Holmes held up a finger and moved his head so that he was whispering directly into my ear. I shivered involuntarily at the feel of his breath on my face. "Listen," he said.

I turned my attention to the sounds of New London at night. Soon I could hear the sound that his ears had already picked up, a buzz of a hovercar filled the air, approaching fast.

It zoomed into view, piloted by a man I didn't recognize. He landed the hovercar nose to nose with the space craft and flashed the headlights twice. Both the door of the space craft and the door of the hover car opened simultaneously and a man stepped out of each. The pilot of the space craft was familiar to me. "Harry Dean is in on this?" I wondered aloud. Dean was on the top of New Scotland Yard's most wanted list for drug trafficking. "I wasn't aware that he'd expanded his activities to other types of smuggling."

"Apparently so," Holmes nodded.

As we watched, the two men spoke. The pilot of the hovercar gestured widely while Dean shook his head, his arms crossed. At last, the hovercar pilot handed over a briefcase to Dean and Dean went back into the craft. He appeared three minutes later followed by a henchman, each carrying a large stack of crates. They loaded their cargo into the trunk of the hovercar.

"Fire your ionizer at the trunk as soon as they shut it." Holmes commanded. I did so, ignoring the fact that he was giving me a lot of direct orders. And me his superior officer! The hovercar pilot ran towards us while Dean retreated back towards his craft. Holmes broke cover at a run, headed for Dean while I stood up holding my ionizer pointed at the hovercar pilot, covering Holmes.

"Freeze, nobody move." I shouted in the general direction of the two craft. The pilot continued to run. I fired a warning shot at a point just above his head. "I said FREEZE!"

At that exact moment, something exploded to the right side of my head and I jumped. The hovercar pilot stopped running, holding his hands in the air.

"Are you alright, Lestrade?" Holmes asked. He was holding Dean's arm firmly. Dean's hand was still clutched around his ionizer.

"You are all under arrest," I proclaimed to all present, angry at the singed hole in a perfectly good uniform.

"I think Greyson will be particularly happy to see you, sir," Holmes said to the man who had followed Dean out of the space craft. He had been trying to sneak away during the struggle. "Lestrade, meet Michael Phelps, one of the most devious smugglers New London has ever seen. But you've let your greed cloud your judgment, my good man. If you open the trunk, Lestrade, you will find the seemingly innocent crates of canned vegetables are actually filled with stolen lunar crystals."

"You insolent meddler, Holmes, I'll teach you to stick your long nose in other people's affairs!" Phelps ran at Holmes, catching him unawares and Holmes was knocked to the ground. He pulled Phelps with him and they struggled for the ionizer that Phelps had produced. I held my own ionizer at the ready, but because of the tangled struggle I didn't have a clear shot. Phelps's ionizer flew into the air in response to a well-placed knock from Holmes's cane. At the same time, Holmes cried out and fell back, clutching his arm.

I handcuffed the man I was holding onto and started running, shouting, "I'm coming, Holmes!" Phelps had kicked away Holmes's cane and stood above him with the ionizer, ready to fire.

"No!" I aimed my own ionizer at Phelps's chest, but before I could fire, Holmes vaulted off the ground executing a perfect back hand spring. Phelps was taken completely by surprise, spinning around when Holmes landed behind him, collecting the cane where it had fallen. Holmes dealt Phelps a hefty blow to the head, stunning him momentarily. I hurriedly put handcuffs on both Phelps and Dean, bundling them into the hovercar with their accomplice.

I turned to Holmes who was recovering from his acrobatic feat, looking slightly dazed. He clutched his right forearm tightly. "All set, Holmes. Are you alright?"

"Yes, yes. Just a bit of a scratch," he replied gallantly. His voice was strained and beads of sweat appeared on his forehead.

"Holmes, you're sweating and its so cold outside I can feel my blood freezing, let me see."

"Let me be, I'm fine." He said angrily turning away from me and walking towards the hovercar. He was always such a baby when it came to injury. He hated to admit that he was fallible in any way, especially physically.

I caught up with him and grabbed his arm, forcing him to release his hold on it. His hand came away to reveal a nasty jagged wound. It had turned his entire sleeve red and I could see bits of metal embedded deep in the skin.

"Zed, Holmes! That's one heck of a scratch. What did he get you with, a rusty nail?"

"A bit of siding from the ship" he mumbled.

"Do you have a hankerchief?" He handed it to me and I pressed it to the wound, tying it with a bit of cord from the rubble heap we'd hid behind. "That should keep you from losing too much blood while we take these guys back to New Scotland Yard. If you feel like you're going to pass out, warn me Holmes."

He pulled his arm away from me impatiently. "I am not about to wilt at your feet, kindly stop fussing."

"Stop being a baby and I'll stop fussing." I replied and got into the driver's seat of the hovercar Dean's buddy had driven to the scene earlier. Still don't even know his name, I thought briefly.

Ok, so here's the deal. The more reviews I get, the quicker I'll get the next chapter written. So if you wanna find out what happens next,

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