A/N: Heeeeey guys :) Sooo, I know it's been a while but hey, I didn't fall off the face of the earth haha :D I was just in Berlin, in Hamburg, it was my birthday on Tuesday (yep, finale day :D) and weeeell I was kinda busy lol. "Flash from the past" and "Talk to me" will be updated in the next couple of days :) I PROMISE! (and I'll work on all the requests from tumblr!)
So, after the season finale I just..had this story in my head and it wouldn't go away ;) So, I decided to write it! :D It obviously takes place after "Damned If You Do" and is veryyyy Tiva centric (basically...just Tiva lol). This will be a multi-chapter fic and will (hopefully) last the entire hiatus haha ;) IF you want it to of course. If you say it's crap, it won't be as long haha :D
Summary: "Well, that's the thing, Ziva. You say you never depended on happy endings but that doesn't mean you don't deserve them." They quit and now they have a whole summer to discuss certain matters. And with no Gibbs around and Rule 12 out the window, some things are just bound to be addressed. Tiva. Post Season X.
Disclaimer: lalala I still don't own NCIS or any of it's amazing characters. MOM, why didn't I get them for my birthday? :(
And noooow please enjoy reading :)

Tony DiNozzo went home that night, feeling confused, empty and – as much as he hated to admit it – alone. Ziva, McGee and him had quit today, trying to save their boss' ass with their decision, taking full responsibility for their actions.

It wasn't fair that Gibbs was taking all the blame. And yes, Ziva had been the most guilty but they were a team and him and McGee weren't innocent either. Not at all.

McGee had helped Ziva track down Bodnar and Tony, well he'd offered to help her, went to Berlin with her to take down Bodnar. He had known back then what he was about to get himself into but he'd done it anyway.

And he'd do it again in a heartbeat. For her. Sure, in the last week he'd found out about her and..Adam. And he hated it. He felt betrayed. Even though that really wasn't the correct word.

It couldn't be. They weren't together after all and therefore she was allowed to sleep with whomever she liked to. But that didn't change the fact that it still pissed him off.

He hated himself for showing her just how jealous he was but he couldn't help it. He was freaking jealous after all. However, even after all that, he couldn't be mad at her.

He couldn't ignore her. Couldn't not love her. And there was the word again. Love. He'd always known that there was something between them but he'd always been afraid to admit it to himself.

Last year when they were stuck in the elevator he had finally let himself accept it: he was in love with his partner. This past year he'd tried to show her exactly how much he cared about her on more than one occasion but as he'd told her last week in the woods, they must have had different interpretations.

Because she went to Adam after all, not to him. He couldn't really blame her. He would have probably done something similar. However, when they'd been at Gibbs' cabin the other day she had literally broken his heart.

The whole Adam thing was not okay but he was able to accept it. But 'friendship'? That was surely not what he'd wanted to hear, nor what he'd call whatever was between them. He'd been so close to confess his feelings to her.

Sure, he'd basically told her through "at lo levad" and in the car right before the crash when he'd told her that he needed to thank Orli and thank her because – and sure, he'd left the statement quite open but one could easily read in between the lines – he loved the person she was now.

But he'd planned to say the actual words one of these days. He'd planned it all out. A little speech, asking her out to dinner, a real date. He'd imagined how she'd react.

In his dreams that smile he loved so much had spread across her face, lighting up the whole room. And she'd said that, yes, she wanted to go on a date with him and that she loved him too.

But now these thoughts seemed far, far away. Unreachable. She considered him to be her friend. Friendship. Nothing else. It was like a slap right across the face.

But what was he supposed to do? Tell her that he didn't want to be her friend but more? That wouldn't have been a very smart move in her fragile state. Yes, fragile.

It was not usually the word he'd use to describe Ziva David but these days, it was more and more fitting. He hated how she was slowly breaking apart but what the hell was he supposed to do?

She'd made it pretty clear that she didn't want his help and that she just considered him a..friend. God, how he hated that word. He plopped down on his couch and ran a hand over his face.

Great, now he was unemployed and the woman he loved didn't love him back, just considered him to be "friend". His life really sucked. Suddenly his cell phone rang and he fished it out of his pocket.

Who was calling him this late? It was past midnight after all. He'd been driving around town for hours, needing to clear his head. Which hadn't really helped but at least he didn't have to face the loneliness of his apartment for a while.

He looked at the screen of his phone and was startled to see her name flash across the display. He pressed the answer button and held the phone to his ear. "Hi Ziva, what's up?", he immediately asked.

He waited for a moment but she didn't answer. "Ziva?", he tried again. Nothing. "Ziva, look, I know it's you. My cell phone told me.", he tried to lighten the mood. Whatever mood this was.

When she still didn't say a word he grew worried. "Ziva, please talk to me. What's wrong?", he asked softly, his voice lowering an octave. But he still didn't get a response.

He whispered her name again and then suddenly heard a chocked sob. And the line went dead.

A/N: I know the first chapter was rather short but I promise, the next one will be longer. This was just some kind of "start" ;) Weeeell, let me know if you want me to continue, if you like it and what you wanna see coming up in future chapters in the reviews section :) I'm open to any suggestions :)
Love y'all
~ C.