A/N: Me: Please accept this (hopefully) funny one shot as a gift for my crappy updating recently. I've been surprisingly busy, for summer.

Fang: Yea- it's been great! She's barely bothered me at all!

Me: Shut it, you. Anyway, just so you know, the first-

MooMoo: The first half of this chapter is just the ending of FANG.

Rawr: So skip if you want to.

Me: Yea… thanks… I guess. Fact: I just got back yesterday from house/dog sitting for my best friend. She's at Jr. Olympic nationals in Texas, except it's for trampoline.

Fang: Well, aren't you two a little pair of athletes?

Me: Why yes. Yes we are ;D

Fang: *facepalm*

Max POV

" "Fang?"

I flicked on the light. The room was empty; his bed was still made. The bathroom was next door, and it too was dark and empty.

"Fang?" I called louder. "We're home!"

I headed out to ask the others if they'd seen him, and that was when I saw the note.

It was propped on the dresser, by the door- a white envelope with my name written on it in Fang's spiky handwriting.

My heart dropped somewhere around my stomach, and my skin went cold, as if I'd stepped into a freezer. Slowly I reached out and picked up the envelope. I opened the flap and pulled out a sheet of paper.

"Max? What are you doing? We're gonna take a couple more photos," said Nudge, swinging around the door. "Since we probably won't all be clean at the same time ever again."

I swallowed. "Is Fang out there with you guys?"

"No- he's not in here?"

"No. I found this." I showed her the note, and her eyes went wide.

"What is it?" her voice was hushed and solemn.

Breathing shallowly, I unfolded the paper. I didn't want to read it- like, if I didn't read it, it would make it not be true.

But I was not a coward. Even about this. So I started reading aloud.

Dear Max-

You looked beautiful today. I'm going to remember what you looked like forever.

Nudge put her hands over her mouth.

And I hope you remember me the same way- clean, ha-ha. I'm glad our last time together was happy.

But I'm leaving tonight, leaving the flock, and this time it's for good. I don't know if I'll ever see any of you again. The thing is, Max, that everyone is a little bit right. Added up all together, it makes this one big right.

Dylan's a little bit right about how my being here might be putting the rest of you in danger. The threat might have been just about Dr. Hans, but we don't know that for sure. Angel is a little bit right about how splitting up the flock will help all of us survive. And the rest of the flock is a little bit right about how when you and I are together, we're focused on each other- we can't help it.

The thing is, Maximum, I love you. I can't help but be focused on you when we're together. If you're in the room, I want to be next to you. If you're gone, I think about you. You're the one I want to talk to. In a fight, I want you at my back. When we're together, the sun is shining. When we're apart, everything is in shades of gray.

I hope you'll forgive me someday for turning our worlds into shades of gray- at least for a while.

I stopped for a moment, trying to breathe. The others had trickled down the hall to see what we were doing, and they were crowded around Nudge, their faces shocked.

You're not at your best when you're focused on me. I mean, you're at your best Maxness, but not the best leaderness. I mostly need Maxness. The flock mostly needs leaderness. And Angel, if you're listening to this, it ain't you, sweetie. Not yet.

I glanced at Angel, and her cheeks flushed.

At least for a couple more years, the flock needs a leader to survive, no matter how capable everyone thinks he or she is. The truth is that they do need a leader, and the truth is that you are the best leader. It's one of the things I love about you.

But the more I thought about it, the more sure I got that this is the right thing to do. Maybe not for you, or for me, but for all of us together, our flock.

Please don't try to find me. This is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, besides wearing that suit today, and seeing you again will only make it harder. You'd ask me to come back, and I would, because I can't say no to you. But all the same problems would still be there, and I'd end up leaving again, and then we'd have to go through this all over again.

Please make us only go through this once.

My throat was closing up, my voice becoming raspy. I could think of lots of times he'd told me no. Nudge edged her hands into the crook of my arm, holding on as if we both needed support.

I love you. I love your smile, your snarl, your grin, and your face when you're sleeping. I love your hair streaming out behind you as we fly, with the sunlight making it shine, if it doesn't have too much mud or blood in it. I love seeing your wings spreading out, white and brown and tan and speckled, and the tiny, downy feathers right at the top of your shoulders. I love your eyes, whether they're cold or calculating or suspicious or laughing or warm, like when you look at me.

I started crying, like a big doffs. I couldn't believe this. I wiped my tears away with the sleeve of my fancy dress.

You're the best warrior I know, the best leader. You're the most comforting mom we've ever had. You're the biggest goofball, the worst driver, and a truly lousy cook. You've kept us safe and provided for us, in good times and bad. You're my best friend, my first and only love, and the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, with wings or without.

Now everyone was crying, even Iggy. We were all sniffing and wiping our faces, and I knew I was right: Reading this out load meant it had really happened, was really happening. To all of us, not just to me.

Tell you what, sweetie: if, in twenty years, we haven't expired yet, and the world is more or less in one piece, I'll meet you at the top of that cliff where we first met the falcons and learned to fly with them. You know the one. Twenty years from today, if I'm alive, I'll be there, waiting for you. You can bet on it.

Goodbye, my love.

Fang

P.S. Tell everyone I sure will miss them.

We were all silent. The letter was wet with my tears, making some of the words run. Fang was usually, well, reserved is a nice word for it. But this letter had poured out a lifetime's worth of love. I felt numb, like someone had just whapped my head hard.

"I can't believe it," said Gazzy.

"That butthead," said Iggy.

"This is my fault," said Angel, her shoulders hunching with sobs.

"No," I told her. "You've done a lot of insane things, but this is not your fault."

I felt very old and very tired. Total and Akila's wedding seemed as if it had happened a year ago. Nudge put her head on my shoulder. I set the letter down and put my arms around her.

Tears were dripping onto my dress, but I wasn't making any sound. There was no sound that could express this kind of pain."

We sat there for, probably, 15 minutes. Finally, we were all out of tears. I went to go take a shower, to wash away all the hair crap and makeup and emotions from the wedding.

I stripped out of my dress and stepped into the steaming water. It felt so good, I can't even tell you.

I stayed in there for another half an hour. I just couldn't deal with it.

But, I found as I sat in the tub, I wasn't grieving anymore. In fact, a very good friend of mine was coming back- anger. Blood curdling, adrenaline pumping, fist clenching, teeth grinding, murderously angry, raging fury anger.

How could he do that to us? To me? I was supposed to be his love! We were supposed to be together forever! How could he just throw that away?

I yanked off the water, quickly dried myself off, threw on clean clothes, and stormed downstairs.

Everyone was curled on the couch, moping. No one was talking or moving.

"I'm f***ing going after that mother f***er." I declared when I walked in.

They looked at me in surprise. "But he said not t-" Iggy started.

"I don't f***ing care! How could he just f***ing up and leave? I am going to f***ing find him, and drag his sorry a** back here if it's the last f***ing thing I do!" I yelled, mad as ever.

"But, he had a go-" Nudge tried to reason.

I screamed like a wild berserker. "HE IS GOING TO F***ING DIE WHEN I FIND HIM! I WILL BEAT THE F***ING S*** OUT OF HIM!" I ran over to the door and threw myself into the air, immediately going into hyper drive. I was pretty sure I knew where he was right now- and I would catch him. And boy, will he be sorry when I do.

Fang POV

I felt like my heart was torn. Into little ant size pieces.

It had to be done, though. And besides, there was nothing I could do now. I'd already left the letter, so there was no going back.

First, I stopped at Dr. Martinez's. I knew she wouldn't be back yet, since she had to drive back from the wedding. I opened the front door (she never locks it- tsk tsk) and went into the kitchen.

I brought a bag, but no food. I had already taken enough from the flock today. I started filling my bag with cans and water bottles from the pantry.

When it was full, I sat down at the kitchen table, and just thought. I thought about Max, Dylan, Max, the wedding, Max, the flock, Max… did I mention Max?

I was startled when I heard tires crunching up the driveway. I looked at my water proof watch- oh no. I had been here for an hour! The flock was probably reading my letter right now!

I jumped up and ran out the back door. I flew into the sky just as Dr. Martinez and Ella got out of the van.

'That was close!' I thought to myself.

Max POV

I skidded to a halt outside of my mom's house. Her car was still warm, so she had just arrived.

I flew (not literally) through the front door. "Max! What's up, honey?"

"Sorry mom, no time to chat. Has Fang been here?" I asked quickly.

She looked confused, so I handed her his letter. As she read it, her eyes grew wide, and some tears shimmered there. "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry!"

I snorted. "Well, I'm not. But has he been here? I'm gonna go kick his a**."

"Don't cuss. And no, he hasn't been here." she replied with a stern look.

I rolled my eyes and took the letter back. I was just about to leave when I heard Ella yell form the kitchen, "Mom? There's a chair knocked over, and the pantry is half empty. What the heck?"

My mom raised her eyebrows at me. I growled low in my throat, sounding very feral, and dove out the open door. As I took off I yelled "Sorry for all the food- I'll bring it back!" Oh, I will. And very soon.

Fang POV

I landed in the shadows of the hawk cave, trying to figure out where I should go. I pulled out my laptop and opened up to my blog.

It was amazing, how many kids there were that said they had special abilities. I looked at all the locations, thoroughly wearing out my eyeballs. It seemed like… that most of them… were in… California. Southern California.

I rubbed my eyes, leaning back against the rock wall behind me. Well, it seems like I'm off to Southern California.

I pulled out a water bottle and started to open it, when my raptor hearing detected an odd sound. It sounded like… a giant pair of wings. But… the hawks weren't that big. Maybe it was an Eraser.

I put my water bottle into my bag, and silently stood up. I got into fighting stance, just as something with wings rolled into the cave, shrieking.

Max POV

I flew into supersonic speed as soon as I was off the ground. Fang was obviously just here, and I knew where he was now.

I flew to the hawks cave in about 25 minutes. When I saw a blue glow from the laptop, and heard rustling in a back pack, I knew I had him.

I barrel rolled into a landing, shrieking like a banshee. I stood up, my feathers out and shaking from rage. I could see in the dim light that he had not expected this at all. He dropped his fighting stance; his eyes were as wide as I had ever seen them; his mouth hit the floor, and he just stared.

I leered at him. "You think you're getting away that easy, a**hole? I don't think so! You are gonna get it!" I yelled as I jumped on him. I still had the element of surprise, and blistering fury, on my side, so I had him pinned in no time.

I sat on his chest, knees pinning down his arms. I punched his face with my right hand, then my left. Then I repeatedly slapped him, making his cheeks bleed.

"Max, I-"

"SHUT UP!"

I pulled his hair out, tugged on his ears so hard they almost came off, two hand punched is chest (several times), karate chopped (and probably broke) his collar bone, and head butted him.

"Max, wait! I-"

"I SAID SHUT UP!"

I gave him Indian sun burns (he always hated those the most) on both arms, to where they almost bled. I bit his finger until it did bleed, then I kneed him. You know where. I got off of him, allowing him to crawl to his knees, before I kicked him in the stomach, knocking the wind out of him.

Yea never kick a man when he's down, right? WELL SHUT UP!

When he looked up at me, when he finally got his breath back, I kneed him in the face. I heard his nose break, and he fell down again.

I lifted up his head by his hair, groaning, and put my head next to his. "You worthless dips***. You think you're leaving? I don't f***ing think so! After all we've been through, you just want to f***ing up and leave? No! NO! Sorry, but it doesn't work that way." I whispered dangerously.

I grabbed his pack, and dragged him out of the cave by his ear. Kudos to him, he wasn't saying anything else. Probably 'cause he knows he deserves it. And 'cause I was about to kill him.

This is a line break brought to you by Au Bon Pain's cinnamon scones.

We landed awkwardly in the front yard, as I hadn't let go of his ear the whole flight, dragging him home in hyper-speed.

I burst through the front door, pulling Fang in with me. "Guess who I found, guys?" I yelled. Everyone in the flock rushed into the foyer to see who it was. Like they didn't already know.

The girls gasped, while the boys growled. Nudge stepped forward and slapped him- hard. Angel covered the other cheek. Gazzy punched him in the stomach, while Iggy punched him in the face. Then I whacked his head really hard, hoping for a concussion.

"So. If any of you ever try to leave, let this dumb piece of s*** be an example/warning!" I said cheerfully. Everyone nodded. I turned to Fang.

"Go clean yourself up. You look like s***."

Fang POV

I am an idiot.

A/N: Me: Yay! Hahahahahaha. I hated FANG. It, in my opinion, was almost as bad as TFW, and that was pretty bad. ANGEL wasn't any better.

Fang: Is that the one where I act like a douche?

MooMoo: Yup.

Rawr: A big one.

Fang: OK, you know what?

Me: Be nice! *snort* Oh, who am I kidding he was a total douche. :D Fact: I recently discovered Smosh on YouTube. Best. Show. EVER!

Fang: Thanks for your support.

Me: You are very welcome. OK everyone, keep reading La Belle Vie, more pairings are coming up soon, so it won't be boring anymore! And there's gonna start being a lot more one shots, too!

R&