19th September

"Interesting." he muttered, obviously indifferent.

I raised an eyebrow in disapproval. Interesting? I was clearly expecting something else. I mean, seriously? This was ridiculous. Not only was he missing out on an amazing opportunity to pick a fight with Gray, but his lack of interest annoyed and worried me at the same time. It was definitely not like him to be so distracted. Usually, something like that would instantly get his attention. And not only in words, but in actions too.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked, almost shouting.

I definitely didn't want it to come out like that, as it was actually a concerned question. He didn't seem to mind it, though, and stared right through me, while calmly replying with a meaningless "Nothing.". I just hated it when he acted like that, and my insides suddenly started to burn with anger. I struggled to contain it, wondering what had gotten into him. Maybe I was being selfish, but I wanted him to tell me when something was bothering him, the same way I did. I guess it just didn't feel right, not being able to cheer him up the way he always does for me whenever something gets me sad or upset. I got closer to him, putting my arm around him.

"You can tell me, you know?" I whispered in his ear. "Whatever it is."

I faked a vague smile, hoping it would get him to trust me. Instead, he raised his head a little and gave me a look that tore right through my heart. It was a look saying that I couldn't help him, no matter what I did. It was saying I wouldn't understand. I felt the tears clouding my vision, but I blinked and held it back. That kind of thing was exactly what made him think that in the first place. I should have been stronger, able to take on whatever weight he would ask me to help him with.

"No. This, I can't tell anyone." he whispered, and I was able to literally hear the sadness in his voice.

"I am not anyone, Natsu. I'm Lucy, your Lucy, you know? There's nothing in the world you can't tell me."

I forced myself to smile for him. If he would know that this whole situation made me sad, he would get even worse, and he would try to cheer me up, without thinking about himself. And I didn't want that. This time, I had to be the strong one, I had to be the one to help him. I needed to, and even though he will never admit it, he probably needed it too.

"I know you want to help me, Luce... I know. But..."

"No but, Natsu!" I interrupted him. "For God's sake, would you, just once, let me help you?"

By then, I was pretty much pissed off, and I knew that my voice wasn't hiding it at all. He flinched and looked at me again. For a second, he seemed to weigh the situation. Could he actually tell me?

"No." he said roughly, with a voice that gave me goosebumps.

He never talked to me like that. I was deeply hurt, though I hated to admit it. And, on top of that, he stood up and left the guild in silence, leaving my arm to hang loose on the bench we were sitting on just a moment before. I stayed there for a moment, staring at the door, unsure whether I was upset or just shocked. After a few minutes, I stood up and headed over to the bar, where Mirajane was giving me an understanding look. I waved my hand to her as a warning not to ask me any questions. I wouldn't have known what answers to give her anyway. Instead, she nodded and put a bottle in front of me as I sat down.

"Drink. It should make you feel better."

"Thank you." I replied, right before I started drinking.

P.S.: I don't remember much else about that night. The few blurry memories I have consist of a heated argument with Elfman and Mirajane, though the exact topic is still a mistery. Something about Natsu and being a man, perhaps... I'm not sure. But I know that after a while more of our friends joined in, and everything turned into yet another riot. Typical night at the guild. It went down pretty soon, though, probably because the main troublemakers, Natsu and Gray, were nowhere to be found. Or maybe I just fell asleep... I don't even know how I got home. All I know is that I waked up in my bed, wearing the same clothes as last night, rays of sunshine dancing over my face. And I was having the worst hangover.

This time thought I'd try my hand at a more narrative fic. I find it quite hard to write this kind of story, so I decided I will continue only if this left you wanting for more. I certainly hope it did. And yes, this is some kind of a diary from Lucy's POV. Is it weird?