Good Evening, dimension travelers
It was the month of October. Bored out of his mind, Morty flipped to AMC. The teenager's pupils grew when all that was on was a marathon of some zombie apocalypse sitcom. Unfortunately, the cast members were doing nothing but sitting and talking inside a barn. Made things worse, when a zombie hoard was scratching against the barn walls.
"I heard that this channel does thriller movies annually every October. Where are they," Morty complained.
Summer came into the room while texting.
"Yeah, they are hardly playing anything until the last week of October," Summer said. "Have you tried Freeform?"
"Well, they play the same garbage every year," the teenage boy stated.
AMC went to commercial break. After a quick thirty-second ad about an updated Xbox One for a few extra pixels, a commercial for the next Saw movie aired. Morty sat on the couch with Vietnam War flashbacks. Jigsaw only reminded him of his second adventure with The Vindicators.
"Oh man," Morty sighed.
Their grandfather overheard the conversation. The two heard him ramshackle through the garage. He stormed into the living room, holding the interdimensional cable box. He placed to box down on the stand and quickly connected it.
"Yeah, Interdimensional Cable Halloween special, bitches," Rick cheered with a shout.
THEME SONG
"Let's see what's on," Rick said. He pressed the power button on the dimensional tv remote. All three were sitting on the couch.
"We just gotta stay off of channel 237," the grandpa stated.
"What's so wrong about it," Morty asked.
"Channel 217 is known to possess paranormal activity," the scientist responded.
"Wait, I thought you said 23-," Summer started. She was interrupted by the sound of the tv.
It was a Chicago like city. A wildfire was vastly spreading throughout the entire city. Voices of women and babies cried out. Apartment buildings were burning down. The sounds of ambulances and police sirens soared.
Mreow, a soft sound played. Suddenly, the television showed imagery of a box of snow white kittens. The kittens didn't have their eyes open, yet. One of them cried out quietly. The other five of the litter were asleep. A much larger white cat walked over to the cardboard box. The mother cat bounced into the box. She had a red collar with a small bell on it.
"Woah, what the hell," the mad scientist shrieked.
The video of cats changed to a scene of 9/11. The footage was a point of view from inside the twin tower. The hijacked plane crashed into the tower. As the jet fuel was somehow melting the steel beams, panic escalated throughout the tower. The public swarmed downed the stairs. Rude adults were pushing others out of the way. Some people on the upper floors got desperate and jumped out the windows.
The screen was interrupted by an image of a dog. It was a Russell Terrier breed. The background was a children's playground. The dog barked and pressed its paws against the screen. He began to lick the camera.
"So this is like reverse jumpscares," Summer stated.
"That'll get old. Next," Rick shouted as he changed the channel.
The screen flashed black. A closeup frame of a familiar blue face flashed. Another quick flash changed the frame. The man had a more sinister smile and was holding up a bloody knife in his right hand. Blood was splattered on the left side of his face.
The blue figure laughed loudly. The screen flash once more. Instead of showing him, there was a girl tied to a chair in a hotel. She was in nothing but her purple lingerie. Her mouth was duct taped shut. She had light cyan eyes. The model had long black hair that stretched down to her thighs. It was wavy with several strands dyed lavender.
She struggled to break free. Nothing. Mr. Meeseeks rubbed two fingers across his knife as he walked up to her.
The screen flashed blood red. The screen was now faded gray. With red texture, it read 'He won't stop until the mission is complete.'
The next scene was shot in a presidential office. The blue creature was looking down at the man in the presidential chair.
"Yes sir, Mr. President," Mr. Meeseeks stated.
"Is it me or does he sound familiar," the clumsy teenager asked.
"Morty, we travel across multiple dimensions and meet hundreds of aliens. Of course, voices are gonna start sounding the same," Rick answered. "I'm just surprised none of the dimensions were Lego-based yet."
A Morty was revealed to be sitting in the chair. He was wearing a blue suit. He had a sinister smile on his face. A piece from The Damaged Coda By Blonde Redhead started to play.
"What the fuck? Rick!"
"Who cares? There are millions of you. Thousands don't even have Ricks of their own anymore," Rick confessed. The grandpa burped. "It's not uncommon that Rickless Morties pursue dead-end careers."
The main Morty rubbed the side of his left arm. "Ye-ye-yeah. I won't look into it," he replied.
The television screen faded to black one last time. The movie title was in a light shade of blue. "The Wrath of Mr. Meeseeks. Coming to theaters this Friday," the announcer said.
Once the commercial ended, it started to air a tv show. The television show was in a post-apocalyptic version of Earth. It was revealed to be dimension C-137. The tough version of Jerry was hunting down a Cronenberg.
Beth of C-137 was right behind him. Thanks to the absence of the original Rick in the dimension, their marriage was perfectly fine. Jerry threw a metal spear at the mutant. The spear lounged into the left side of the mutant. The great Cronenberg grunted out in pain as it collapsed onto the ground.
"Hey, Morty isn't that the dimension you and grandpa abandoned," Summer asked as she pointed at the screen.
"Yes, it is," the dork responded.
"Oh stop it, Morty! You," Rick started. The grandfather burped, before continuing. "Know the infestation was your own fault. There was nothing left I could do." Rick then thought to himself for a second. "C-137 sounds almost the same as channel 237."
The Cronenberg was bleeding out in pain. Jerry and Beth calmly walked up to the monster. Jerry grabbed hold of the spear and sliced the monster's side open. The couple was expecting to see guts, blood, and intestines to come out of the open wound.
Suddenly, a bear came out of the mutant's skin. The grizzly roared out loud. The drama parents of the show screamed as the bear began to maul at them.
As the animal scratched at Beth, Jerry crawled a few inches away from the attack. The bear used another paw to pull Jerry back in.
"Damn it, I finally had my chance to be a badass," the loser screamed.
A version of Stephen Baldwin chuckled as he came into view. He wore a raggy green boy trooper outfit. He wore a hat made of bear skin.
"This is Bear Tactics," the man stated.
The live action show's title card appeared. It was placed on a grassy background with text wooden pallets.
A montage of humans and aliens getting mauled by hidden bears played.
Rick changed the channel.
The next channel was showing a slasher movie. A stereotypical caucasian female blonde with big breasts was running alone in a forest at night. She was wearing nothing but a white bath towel to cover herself. The sound of a chainsaw's engine could be heard in the background.
"Somebody help," she cried. Her bare feet cause her to trip a bit over nothing.
The killer caught up with her. He wore a hockey mask. He had red and blue striped overalls. He had a bald head with needles sticking inside his skull.
The killer held his chainsaw against a tree. The saw quickly cut through the bark. The tree began to fall. It ended up on top of the girl. Her entire body was crushed with only her left arm hung out from the side. The palm's fingers twitched a bit before she remained motionless.
"Well, that's an actual interesting way to kill somebody with a chainsaw weapon," Summer declared.
A tv commercial came on. It featured Mr. Needful the Devil and Summer. They were inside their little shop. The two held hands and looked like a happy couple.
"That can't be right," Summer defended. "We broke up months ago."
"It's called interdimensional for a reason. Anything is possible. Who knows, maybe there's a dimension where Morty and I are a couple."
Mr. Needful picked up a black jack in the box. He started to crank the lever. An eerie version of 'Pop goes the Weasel' played from the box.
Laughing Jack bounced out of the box.
"Let's see what lets loose," the demonic clown shrieked. Laughing Jack then began to ransack through the shop.
"Come on by Needful Things, tonight," Summer said. The commercial ended.
"Give me the remote," Summer shrieked.
The older sister reached for the remote. She accidentally pressed the channel down button on it. She tried to yank it away.
On the screen was a dimensional version spoof of Scooby-Doo. The gang was surrounded by ten alien cows in a spaceship. The alien cows stood up on their hind legs and wore blue suits. There was no need for space helmets in the Rick and Morty universe. The few females wore space domes over their utters.
Grandpa Rick pulled the controller back to himself. In the back and forth struggle, the television kept changing channels.
One channel showed a clip from an episode of Family Guy, Peternormal Activity. It was showing the cutaway of Cleveland chocking on a bar of soap in the bathtub. Peter Griffin backed away in fright, only to trip on the haunted soap. He ended up hitting his head on the side of the sink. Peter fainted in a puddle of his blood.
The next channel showed a clip of American Dad's Halloween special titled 'Best Little Horror House in Langley Falls'. The power was out in their house. Stan and Francine were held up in the kitchen as five serial killers were in the house. As the two held up furniture to barricade the door, the window broke! The convicted killers broke inside. They wore orange prison jumpsuits, due to being on death row.
Next, it showed dogs and cats running around with no head in hell. Then, there was a girl in the bathroom taking a selfie. Her breasts exploded, causing milk and skin to splatter on her face. She grew disgusted really quick.
"All these channels and nothing to watch," Morty said out loud.
Summer finally was able to pull the controller out of her grandfather's hands. She held the remote above her head with her right arm. She flicked to a random channel.
"Booyah," the teenager proclaimed.
"All you wanted to do was change the channel," Morty said. "Wh-wh-w-why did you two have a big fuss over it?"
White numbers in the above corner read 213. Static appeared on the screen for a few moments. The television seemed to turn itself off. It flashed back on and showed many giant black arms waving in front of the screen. They didn't seem to have a body.
"What the fuck," Morty shrieked.
"I tried to warn you about channel 213," Rick replied.
A giant black hang came out of the television screen. The hand tightened its grip around Summer Smith. It began to pull her in towards the television. Her feet dragged on the ground, slowing down the demon's pace.
"Grandpa Rick," Summer screamed.
She pounded her fists down at the demon's arm, but to no avail. Rick took out a ray gun and shot a few times at the demon's arm. The ray beams deflected off it and bounced onto the ceiling and floors.
The titular characters scrambled onto their feet. Another giant demon hand came out of the tv. It tried to wrap its fingers around Rick.
"Oh geez," Morty sighed. The young boy crawled on his knees and scooted towards the tv stand.
The mad scientist grunted as he took out a green liquid syringe. He stuck the needle into the demonic arm and spray the liquid in. The arm jerked a little which made the empty syringe fly off. It then squeezed around Rick.
The two arms were pulling Summer and Rick towards the television at extreme rates. The arm that was around Rick began to loosen its grip. Its fingers were now green. The fingers turned into pickles and fell onto the ground. The scientist was let free. He stepped away and picked up a pickle from the ground. He ate the pickle as he watched the arm.
The entire arm was now green. It turned into a giant pickle. The pickle unstrapped itself from the tv and fell onto the ground. Unlike Pickle Rick, this pickle had no mindset and would remain completely harmless.
Meanwhile, the first arm nearly had Summer close to the television screen. She held onto the side of the TV. The arm pulled harder to make her come into the tv. She squirmed as Rick held onto her shoulders.
"I'm not gonna lose you to the TV! What a stupid way to go," Rick said.
A knock sound was heard. The demon arm vanished instantly. Rick and Summer looked at the television and saw that it was turned off. Morty crawled out from beneath the tv stand. He stood up and smile.
"There, I unplugged it," Morty said.
"Of course," Summer sighed. "Thanks, little bro."
Rick walked up to the stand and grabbed the interdimensional cable box. He unhooked the box and held it up.
"I think it's best we stay away from interdimensional cable for a while, Rick said. His grandchildren nodded in agreement.
END CREDITS
"Ooh wee, what a special," Mr. Poopybutthole said.
His baby boy crawled into the room. The boy was dressed in a little brown puppy outfit. He gave out a small hiccup. The minimal sound alerted the baby's father's attention.
Poopybutthole turned around and gasped at the young one. He picked up his son. He began to carry him out. "Baby Butthole? You know the misses will yell at me if you watch this inappropriate show."
Butthole went into the baby's bedroom and laid the baby down in its crib. He then chuckled nervously as he looked at the camera. His wife came into the room and wrapped an arm around him.
"Ah yes, I'm sure you are wondering what happened to Morty and my gay marriage and how I married the misses. I would love to tell you, but we are out of time."
As the parasprite leaned in for a kiss, Mrs. Poopybutthole reached for her own face and peeled it off. She tossed the mask down and revealed herself to be a bear this whole time. The grizzly in disguise took a bite out of Poopy's face.
Poopy yelled out for help as he struggled to push it off. The baby cried from its crib.
Stephe Baldwin came into the room. He chuckled as the bear continued to eat Poopy. The guest appearance began to sign off the show.
"This has been Bear Tactics," Stephen Baldwin said.