She stood frozen in front of the mirror picking out flaws in her appearance, running her fingers through the delicate satin of her white gown. How did she get here? She barely remembers. All she knows is she is a bundle of nerves on the day which is suppose to be the 'happiest of her life'. Granted her concept of a lifetime is vastly different to most others including her fiancee but still. She should feel a little happiness right?
Deep breaths.
You can do this. She tells herself. You can do this. You can do this.
"Caroline?"
Her head snaps up in the mirror to the questioning gaze and hero haired reflection.
You can't do this.
She swirls around to fully face him and words fault him as his mouth hangs open and breathing halts.
She's beautiful. Breathtakingly so.
There is a long pause between them eyes gazing into each other as neither find the right words, before she breaks their gaze and takes a deep breath.
"You look... beautiful, Caroline"
"...Thanks"
Words fault him again as he continues to stare speechless at her beauty.
"Are the girls ready?" And so to the real reason he is here. Not as invited guest, or friend not even as the groom he pictured himself to be if Caroline ever got married, but rather babysitter. Transporting the twins to their mum before the ceremony so she could organize some last minute details. At least he was still trusted in regards to taking care of the two most precious people in her life, although leaving them with Damon would not help his case.
"Uhh, yeah Damon's outside with them waiting for you"
She takes another deep breath. You can do this.
"Well I better get going then". She reaches for her bouquet of daisies before brushing past Stefan to the door behind him.
Her smell is intoxicating. Slight vanilla scent reminding him of just her. Times of just him and her and happiness. Pure happiness he fears he will never feel again.
His eyes shut in a tingling sensation as she brushes past him. Jaw clenched as she moves past him. Moves on from him, with her new family to her new life without him. And he's taken back to that porch 3 years ago only this time it's her leaving him behind.
You can do this. He tells himself. She has a life, a family now. She's happy. Just let her be happy.
Deep breaths. You can do this. You've hurt her too many times. She doesn't love you anymore. You can do this.
He hears the door opening behind him. You can't do this.
"Don't marry him" his voice sounds alien to him. Quivering in fear. She already told him no. He's too late. What does he think is going to happen other than receiving a heart shattering rejection but he can't do nothing. He turns to face her frozen posture back to him hand on the door handle.
"What?" Her voice is small. Confused. Her head peeks over her shoulder to his piercing gaze.
"Don't marry him" he repeats this time keeping her line of sight gaze unnerving and certain.
"-Stefan" she closes her eyes and he knows her answer. Knows she's going through with this no matter what. But he can't let her go without at least saying it out loud.
"Please Caroline" and the desperation is clear in his voice. Begging at this point.
She quietly closes the door and turns to fully face him.
You can do this.
"I know that I screwed up, an that I hurt you..." His voice cracks at that as he sees the build up of tears in her eyes she forces not to fall.
"...but there has not been a second in these three years where I haven't missed you.."
He etches towards her ever so slowly as her head lightly shakes side to side.
"...where I haven't wished with every power in this world that I could see your smile, hear you're laugh..." his lips twitch at the corners
"... watch you stress clean when you're trying to hide something, or how you scrunched up your nose when someone makes your coffee wrong or even be there when you literally kick me out of bed at ungodly hours in the mornings.." they both lightly laughed at that as tears began streaming down her delicate roses cheeks and he eased that little bit closer to her.
"... there hasn't been a single day that I haven't wanted to come back to you..." they now stood face to face as his thumb delicately brushed over her cheek whipping away the tears "... to come home..". Cause that was she was. His home. He let his hand rest on her cheek cradling her jaw as his head inclined towards her. Eyes fluttered closed as he felt her breath on his his lips.
You can do this.
"...Stefan?..." She breathed against his lips. He froze in place. Was she yearning him to continue with moans of his name? Or begging him to stop?
"...Don't.." His heart shattered to million pieces in that one syllable. He raised his hopes enough to believe they could do this. He could be happy again. He remained stotic in position, lips a breath away from hers as his jaw clenched and eyes slowly crept open to piercing blue. He slowly dropped his hand that was craddling her face and took a defeated step back.
"I'm sorry..." Tears forming in his eyes as he slowly nodded to her decision words once again faulting him. As he looked to the ground.
"... It's not that I'm mad... or even that I don't love you... Because I do...I love you.." His eyes snapped up to hers at that as she now lost the ability to speak.
".. It's just... I .. we.."
"- you're a family" he cut in.
"Yeah" she responded in a small voice.
"But you don't love him?" She shook her head clearly not wanting to go down this road, but Stefan remained strong as his hands flung forward to cradle her jaw forcing her to look into his eyes.
"you don't love him Caroline..". His stern gaze met her wide eyes as her hands moved to wrap around his wrists.
"Love is overrated" she whispered in a defeated tone loosening his grip on her and forcing his hands to clenched fists at his side.
"It'll be good for the girls. A whole family"
"You're always gonna be their mom, Caroline". He wished she could see that she didn't need to sacrifce her happiness for this. She didn't need to marry someone she didn't love just to be a mother. Ironic that he couldn't take that advice himself and just accept Damon as his brother and not constantly sacrifice his own happiness for no reason. But not anymore. Him and Caroline deserved to be happy. He wanted this.
"And Ric's already had one almost wedding in his life... I promised him you know" she was now whipping the tears that had formed on her cheeks.
"- Caroline..."
"- It's ok. It's the way it's meant to be" she gave her sad 'i'm fine' smile. One that is completely fake and he hates it. Hates that she needs to pretend with him now. Hates that this is what they have become.
He looks to the floor, unable to stand the walls built between them. Wall's she's been forced to build around herself because of him. Because he broke her heart leaving 3 years ago even though it was the last thing in the world he wanted to do. He knows now. That he was just another in a long list of people who left her behind, although in his mind he never did. Never could
"...Besides, the girls are super excited to be flowers girls..." she announced as she picked up the bouquet she dropped at some point during his impromptu speech.
".. and I don't want to let them down.." she wipes under her eyes to hide the tears she just shed preparing to leave.
"-Then marry me." And he says it without thinking. No plan, no idea thought out. His last lifeline to get her to stay. And for all his over thinking every decision he ever makes, he'll be damned that this was the best one he's ever made. A complete spur of the moment desperate plea.
Her eyes dart around the room in a humorous laugh. "... What do you want a June wedding?" She takes it as a joke but he's never been more serious. She turns to leave the room once and for all when he asks again. You can do this.
"Marry me"
She looks over her shoulder to meet his unnerving gaze in all it seriousness. You can do this.
"I'm marrying Ric"
"But you love me"
"Yeah... and look where that's gotten me" she declares before yanking open the door and flying out as fast as her legs can carry her.
All he can do is watch as the door shuts behind her and as the tears stream down his face he grabs the nearest object he can gather which happens to be a chair, and flings it across the room. Before collapsing to the ground in agonizing pain of heartbreak.