Title: Don't regret
Author:Little_firestar84
Rating: M
Word Count: 886
Characters: Nathan/Audrey
Genre: Romance, Hurt/Comfort.
Summary: He cries because he has almost forgotten how it could be, and because he can't compare Audrey, with anyone, and she cries, because it can't be the end already for her.
Disclaimer: Uhm, no, no way. I'd like for them to be mine, but they aren't. Ergo, Nathan and Audrey don't get enough love in real show.
Notes: spoiler until last episode. ALSO: First M rated piece of Haven goodness. very soft, very sweet, very...vanilla.
She came to him at his apartment few hours after they have parted, with the promise of talking again, of saying everything when they'll both know there will be time.
But, she couldn't wait. Not when she knows that she could not have a "tomorrow". Not fearing missed opportunities and chances.
She doesn't want to live with regrets. Or, if she'll have regrets... better regret having done something, than regretting not having given it a try.
He opens his door, still with the clothes of the day, and she attacks immediately his lips. It's nothing like the kisses they had shared in the past, and, grinning, she knows it's nothing like when he kissed Sarah-ye, she remembered it.
She doesn't need to ask him if it was better than with Jordan, there is no need to. She knows it, and it's not because he couldn't feel the brunette.
It's just that Nathan loves her. And now she knows it.
Without breaking the kiss, she walks him backward towards his bedroom, discharging every now and then items of clothing- his shirt, her pants, his pants, her shirt - until, when his legs hit the mattress, they are clad only in their underwear.
She straddles him, giggling. She looks at him with tears of happiness, and she is not crying because she is going to vanish or because this could be their last, only time together.
Simply, she had lost faith it could actually happen. at all, and now... having it happening, it's overwhelming. it overflows her heart with emotions she can't even describe, she isn't even sure she had ever felt, at all.
Audrey Parker-the real one- may have been in love, but it wasn't her. Sarah and Lucy, thy had both loved- and Sarah had even loved the same man she did- but it wasn't like this. She had never loved, not even Chris.
This is new. Thrilling. Earth-shattering. It's... well, she can't believe she is actually thinking it, she thinks giggling at loud against the skin of his shoulder, but... the songs are finally making sense.
(And even the romance novels. But It's not like she'll ever admit reading Millar and Boom...)
He doesn't say a word-his quizzical stare says it all, and they know each other well enough to understand what they mean even without words- and she simply shakes her head, leaning over him to kiss him yet again. This time, it's not frantic, but it's slow and sensual, just like seduction should be, and he takes advantage of the situation to unlock her bra, and help her out of it.
They part, and she is suddenly shy about her body, she wants-and try- to cover herself, but he is the one shaking his head this time, his lips busy showing her just how much he appreciates her nipples, rolling the tender bud between his lips.
God, it feels so good... One of them breaths between moans, and she is pretty sure it's been him. She wonders how he is feeling right now. She wonders if he has been for 3 years without sex, after his trouble returned full force.
She hopes it will as good as it will be for her. she hopes she'll make him feel good, better. Because that is what he is doing for her right now. For the first time, she feels. and she can finally believe that she is real, and not just a body with someone else memory.
"just feels, Audrey... just feel me..." he breathed in their next kiss, as he helped her out of her underwear and she does the same for him.
He kisses her all over, and she almost cries-cries out, in pleasure because being engulfed by him, finally, at last, it's the best feeling in the world, and in desperation, because she knows the painful truth, that she may have to go into the barn no matter what, that this could be their only chance.
"Feel me..." he breathes as he enters in her, rocking against her body languidly, slowly. It may not be vanilla, but it's not harsh, and yet, it's the most sensual and erotic feeling, sensation, experience of her life, all her lives.
She finally feels alive. real. not just a memory. not just a body. Her, the whole of her. Because Nathan wouldn't want her any other way.
Because Nathan wouldn't love any other way.
Sobbing, because this just can't be the end, she cries her release, and he follows her soon afterward, her own orgasm instigating his own- that' s pretty much indication that he had been sex-less since he got his trouble back, the poor guy. She almost chuckles in victory, despite her tears wetting his warm skin, skin shuddering all over because it's been so long he had almost forgotten how it could be-not that it could actually compare with Audrey, it's everything because it's her, and not because he can feel her.
He pats her back affectingly, and kisses her hair. He'll never regret this, he could never regret Audrey. He could only regret not trying to keep her there, safe.
That's why he'll try to avoid the barn situation with all his might. That's why he'll follow her if she'll have to enter anyway.
He'll never allow this to be the end.