Its been a while

i hope you dont hate me

give this a chance, it has a couple good strings

i own nothing


Head over Heart

Draco Malfoy sat in the corner of his cell, wishing he had a chessboard.

Any minute now, the dementors would be near… he could almost feel them now.

They couldn't feel him much anymore.

He may have had a soul, but its not like he had blessed memories to fill it with.

Any merry moments stayed in his head.

They couldn't reach him there.

He had.

He had been able to log into his brain and sift through every moment that ever gave Draco a reason to live.

There weren't many.

But, quality over quantity.

His mother laughing good-naturedly on a sunny day spent happily, as Draco ran frightened from a curious badger.

His father had shot the animal with a cruel green string of light.

But mother had hid his face from what happened.

His mother snuck him a broom in the middle of the night, and they flew away to an inn for the weekend.

Lucius had beaten them both when he found them.

But mother had found him later and showed him a spell to cover the scars.

He remembered his inauguration.

And the disappointed, worried, tearful look on her face as he left for the confrontation without a goodbye. And the way Draco had pushed her off, calling her weak.

Just like him.

And the proud look on his face. And the look on His face.

Draco's eyes snapped open. His mind had drifted to a dark place.

The dementors were before him. They moved slowly.

They were not eager, Draco was too melancholy. He was soulless already.

The importance of his life didn't really mean anything to them.

They cared about what he had in him.

In his heart.

They had been here before, twice, in fact. They were on orders not to deliver the kiss just yet.

But they sucked damn near anything else from him.

Draco was powerful in occlumency, and legilmency.

But that was his mind.

And they attacked his heart.

So Draco pulled the thoughts.

Pulled all emotion from them.

Merely remembered them as occurrences.

He closed his eyes and concentrated on his most important thoughts,

But no interaction.

No emotions.

The dementors opened the door.

A blonde woman held a blonde child as he cried unceasingly.

Three of them entered.

The blonde woman appeared again, this time standing before a large blonde man. The blonde child was on the floor behind her, sobbing.

Draco's eyes popped open. One of the dementors was only a foot away from him.

And he was going the wrong direction.

She laughed. And laughed and laughed. Draco fell in the lake and was pushed out by the giant squid. Draco sneered at her, and she laughed harder and sea weed fell out of his hair.

He saw the large poof of brown hair and followed her down the corridor. She was pushed up against the wall, squirming because of him. Draco laughed as her hair got caught in Potter's mouth.

He remembered when she found him.

He had been unconscious, laying underneath the corpses of Vinn and Greg.

Weasel was about to cover the whole heap when she saw the hair and pulled him out, a look of utter disbelieving on her face.

"Malfoy?" she had whispered, pulling off the white mask.

Despite his fear, his pain, and his honest relief, he sneered.

"Mudblood."

Her face darkened. She still wasn't over it.

But when her face carried any emotion, it gave her character.

Beautiful.

He could never make her smile.

And a scowl was the only thing he ever got.

Better than indifference.

He loved the fact that he challenged her.

That she tried to create plans to get back at him.

He loved that she had that dedication for him.

Weasley and pothead didn't deserve it. All they ever did was copy her homework.

They didn't even realize how genius it was.

That she was always there.

That she even gave up seventh year for it.

She had been Head Girl.

Well, she would've been.

Draco heard the professors wanted to keep waiting for her to arrive.

But she never did.

She was too loyal to them

Not that Draco deserved it.

He never gave any sign of giving her the time of day.

But, at night.

In his dormitory, when his skinny body was wrecked with tears and Crabbe and Goyle were long asleep.

He thought about her.

He though about ripping her to shreds.

Sometimes he would see her smile.

Never at him.

But still, a smile.

When she was with her friends, or a boyfriend.

Or late at night, all alone in the library, her face would light up the whole library when she overcame something she didn't understand.

He remembered when it all changed.

When their childish games were over.

When she really hated him.

He remembered running away that night.

He remembered going to her dormitory window.

It was hell to get past the guards.

They were all jittery from the death of Dumbledore, only a few hours previous.

He remembered she had cried in the redheads arms. He had kissed her and Draco watched with awe the things that continued that night.

Draco remembered when she smiled.

Draco would remember it all later.

But not with his heart.

His brain would recall all the images and sounds.

He would be watching it all over again.

Creating new emotions and feelings.

All over again.

Maybe this time he would realize where he went wrong.


a/n

Yes, crap, I know

I only popped it out to show that I'm still alive.

I'll have more soon.

Maybe only a few one shots, but its something, eh?

This story… I dunno.

Too many ideas shoved into one story.

I think it was confusing.

Well, tell me whatcha think… not that anyones gunna review anyways. :(