It is I, your somewhat lovable author, Goodralisk. So I said I rewrote this chapter, but I was an idiot and I did it quite half assed. So, I'll finally give future and return readers a courtesy and write this chapter into something people will enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

...Was that so hard, Deadpool?

Deadpool: That's what she said.

Darkness. The black inky void of nothingness was all that surrounded me. And just as I couldn't see anything but my own body, I couldn't hear anything but my own speech and thoughts. I scratched my head, not to sate any specific irritation, but out of confusion. Where am I, I thought. This was not my bedroom, nor any place of my own domain. Perhaps it was a dream. A little too real for a simple dream, but not unfeasible.

"Eric…"

I suddenly turn my attention to the voice only to realize: there was no direction nor voice to turn to. Interesting. My only form of company in this uniform black abyss was a disembodied space voice. Now all I need is some ice cream and I can recreate a musical number from Phineas and Ferb. But enough about hypothetical cartoon songs. What is going on?

"Eric… our world is in dire need of assistance…"

This suspiciously sounds like the start of Mystery Dungeon, though leagues more blatant. And I highly doubt that some thin, nerdy 15 year old child is really their ideal hero.

"However...there are a few simple questions that need answers," the lilting voice strung out.

Definitely some Mystery Dungeon crap.

"You see a delinquent harassing a person in broad daylight. What do you do?"

Intriguing question, all things considered. Often I was a mild-mannered kid, unless someone was in need, especially if that need was protection. "Well, disembodied space voice, I'd step in and stop that crap before it goes on any further."

"Second question. Do you like to fight?"

"Hells yeah. That's my bread and butter."

"What is the one weapon you wish to carry?"

This was a tough one, but a good old sword and some magic never hurt anyone. "One sword and some magical spells, please."

"Okay then," the voice giggled, immediately making me realize how feminine the voice was. "Do you enjoy groan-inducing puns?"

I raised a confused brow and tilted my head, unable to make sense of it. "Um...sure?"

"Do you enjoy pranks?"

"Okay, wait, wait, wait." Cue the record scratch. What the hell is going on? Am...am I dead? Please don't say I'm dead. I have so many things left I want to do with my life, like I'm still in school, I am still in training for wres-

"Silence!"

...the fuck? I know the disembodied space voice didn't tell me to shut up. "The hell are you?"

"You dare speak to the Divine Dragon as such?"

"Yeah, and I'm the king of Hyrule," I laughed. "There's no way you can be THAT dragon. Show yourself, and explain what the fuck is going on!"

"A crude request, but very well." A light breeze blew through the infinite darkness, tickling my skin. That's when I realized I was still in my sleepwear. My blue plaid pajama bottoms and an undershirt. I was in the presence of God, and I was in nothing but pajamas. On the wind glowed a green colour, the gentle breeze gradually becoming a whirlwind capable of knocking me off of my feet. The glowing green gusts took shape in the form of a human-like spirit. It had an ethereal essence to it, and it wore a dress that looked like it was form fitting, she had green hair and she had a headdress.

I folded my arms and put my weight on my left leg. "And who might you be?"

"I am the Divine Dragon you claim me not to be. I am Naga."

"Naga," I repeated in disbelief. "As in the Earth Dragon from Fire Emblem? That Naga?"

"The very same."

"Just one question."

"You are not dead, young lord."

I brought my raised finger down, my question answered before it was even asked. "However...you are here because you are the one. It is your time to answer the call."

Do I not get a say in this, I thought.

"You do not. This is by no means negotiable," Naga bellowed. "Begone with you for now."

*thud*

Ow. Falling out of bed in the morning. I can check that off of my list of clichés. On the other hand, at least it woke me up. Crawling to my nightstand with a hand on my head to nurse the growing welt, I check my alarm clock, and it says...8:05?! Crap, I'm going to be late for school! I quickly put on my school clothes, take a banana, and rush out the door. "Gah, I can't be late! I have exams!" Even though I am only in Grade 9, exams are nothing to joke about. Shuddering at the thought of my teacher roaring at me, I sprint as hard as I can down to school.

I get to school just in time and after several hours, I finish my exams for the day. I think I did well enough to pa-oh, who am I kidding, I crushed it. So I don't have to worry about them again!... until next year. Yay. I go back home at around noon, tired as hell, because I had the great luck of having to do Gym exams. I like P.E. and all, but the final exam was physically brutal. At least it had me warmed up for the formal exams.

"I'm home!", I shout, dropping my bag as I enter my house. Then I remember that no one was home. "Oh, right, the fam's gone out for the day." I fall onto the couch and I take out my 3DS, turning it on. "What do I have in this thing again? I haven't been able to play lately.", I mused to myself. The device lit up and in the game card icon was Fire Emblem: Awakening. I swear I had around 500 hours on this game. Loading up the game and clicking on the correct save file, I start to play the Endgame level against Grima.

I cackled maniacally as I played all of the characters to do my bidding, and the enemy troops did the same. "Dance, puppets, dance!" As I came to beating the level, I enter the final fight with the Ylissean prince, Chrom, and the Plegian born Grandmaster of Ylisse, Robin. They got ready in their respective battle stances, but something felt different. Something felt odd.

"..."

All I heard was incoherent muttering that was followed by a gleam of purple from the Fell Dragon's eyes. Suddenly, my eyelids became heavy and my body felt sluggish. I could literally feel my body shutting down as I tried to resist the grip of unconsciousness, but to no avail. My eyes had succumbed to the familiar black void.

I finally come to, but not on the warm embrace of couch cushioning. I wake up on something cold and hard, with a slightly grainy feel. It felt like stone brick. My house and room didn't have stone brick last time I checked. Fully alert now, my eyes shot wide open, frantically looking around to see what the hell was going on. I instantly jumped to my feet and I noticed something else was wrong. Everything around me felt bigger than it usually was. Puzzled, I make my way to a nearby mirror in my chamber only to be beside myself with shock. I was wearing different clothing, robes of deep black and red colouring adorned with a lot of golden trim and a ceremonial dagger hanging from the left side of my breast.

But most notably, I had regressed in age and development.

"This… isn't real…" I clutch my head, hoping this was not real. "It has to be fake…" I cover my mouth at the sound of my voice, the pitch and tones of my voice much higher than before. I was desperate for answers at this point.

Suddenly, I hear rapping noises on my bedroom door. "Are you alright in there, my boy?"

Without thinking, I open the door to see a very menacing man with dark pale skin towering over me at a staggering 6'2", his messy hair cascading down to shoulder level. His piercing glare softened to something more… nurturing, perhaps? "I heard noise, so I came up to check on you," he said. "Are you making preparations okay, Eric?"

His husky voice hissed with every word that left his mouth, and even though he showed no intent on hurting me, I was petrified. The words that left my thoughts died in my throat, causing me to swallow a lump that felt as if it were gradually increasing in size.

"Well, are you going to answer your father or not?"

I'm sorry. Run that by me again. This man-this weird, slender, somewhat creepy-looking man-is my father? No. Impossible. I've never seen him in my entire life. He looks familiar, but I'm positive we never met before.

"Preparations for what?" I asked, holding my throat. The high pitched screech again. The one part of pre-pubescence I hated the most. Shaking his head, my apparent father bent down to one knee with a soft smile on his face.

"Your third birthday, my boy. What else could it be?"

Third. THIRD. I am only THREE fucking years old here. How on Earth did I grow 12 years younger? I had many questions and thoughts swarming my mind until a woman in a red dress wearing a golden headdress showed at the man's side. She was absolutely beautiful, stunning even. She was fair skinned, her figure was very healthy and she looked no older than her mid twenties. "Lester, I'm fairly certain he is capable of taking care of the task of dressing himself," she laughed softly. "The ceremony is going to begin soon."

"Ah, good," he said. "I find it so amusing. Tender age of three, and yet he is already being inaugurated as an official Pandorian soldier. It seemed like yesterday, he just learned how to walk."

"I know," the woman said. "I never would have thought such genius and aptitude to be possible. And to be this far so early… this makes me so proud as a mother."

"I'm ready, mother," I said, interrupting their own little conversation. Lester, my father, looked back at her. "Shall we then, Eliza?"

The celebration was huge for something so simple. I only turned three here apparently. It's not like I went to war and brought a treasury of gold with me. One such part of the ceremony was a speech by the Pandorian clergymen that was followed by giving me a ceremonial dagger. They directed me to draw blood with the dagger on the palm of my hand and drop my blood into an intricate map of seals, maintained by six sages of the highest prestige in the realm. A few drops of blood fell into a box of purple lines, the seal lines transforming from purple to glowing vibrant red, matching the droplets falling from my hand.

This was done with every new warrior of Pandora, the seal was said to make the warrior infallible in combat and show the power that us of the realm were capable of. And truly, it certainly felt like it. I began to feel odd, like a tide washed over me, and I felt like I could move mountains. But what happened that was unlike all the other warriors was the somewhat searing sensation on my forehead. Once this ritual is done with anyone of Pandorian royal lineage, their family brand surfaces, proof of blue blood and being born into the strongest house in the land. So this was what the power of an official warrior was like.

My eyes almost never left my father's form. Something bothered me and kept me wondering why he looked familiar. I figured he looked a little like Validar. Wait.

…meh. Sheer coincidence.

For the next few years afterward, I fought on the front lines like every other soldier, and I fought alongside my father. Whether it be bandits, or invading soldiers, the sword fell to them all the same. Killing my first man at such a young age invoked a feeling of power that I quickly became addicted to. Though the difference between since I got here and now is that I've learned that a western country far past Ylisse has a great relationship with that of Pandora.

Because of such, I became friends with the young Chon'sinese princess. She was the same age as I was, and she seemed a little tomboyish, so she and I would always be sparring for fun. And when we got bored of that, she and I played a few games and for the most part, did all of our childhood tomfoolery together, including stealing food from the kitchens from time to time. Everything in my life was good so far. Until one day, a certain incident occurred in which I'd never forget.

At this point in time. I'm just wandering the southern area of... Ylisse, I believe. I am now 6'4" with a blaze hairstyle and I don my Pandorian royal garb: black hakama pants, a black sleeveless shirt with a dark crimson warrior belt to hold my sword. I am also wearing the Pandorian royal coat, which is a purple haori with only one sleeve on the right side and a strap that attaches to the cloak so it fits. I wear a black birdlike eye-mask, which is just personal preference.

You may wonder, why am I wandering Ylisse like some sort of Fire Emblem Ryu, instead of living in and ruling the continent of Pandora? Simple.

My parents, the king and queen, are dead. They were murdered in cold blood, by the man I hated the most. And I was not going to stop my travels until he lies dead at my feet. It had been over fifteen years since I last saw my home and my halidom, but those fifteen years has given me the strength I will need to kill him.

I arrive into what I believe is Southtown with my companion, Mei Ling. I found her when I was 12 and she's been with me ever since. I let her go into the forest to explore as the city scenery doesn't fit her interests and she doesn't like the city. Oh well. Suit thyself, I guess.

Meanwhile, I stroll through the town and enter the local pub, the most popular establishment around these parts. The bustling joint roaring with excitement, many drunken people cheering and having a merry time with one another. Earning either perplexed looks, enticed glances by the women or some intense glares by some of the men, I take my seat at an open stool, hailing the bartender. "White grape spritzer, roasted pork, and, uh" I tossed a few gold coins on the counter. "Keep the change."

Shortly, I received my meal and I began to eat it heartily and I enjoyed it, that is until I heard a loud boom. Taking one last bite off of the bone, I ran out of the door to see a column of smoke in the sky. Which by common sense's dictation, was usually never a good thing. So I dash down the road to see a group of men setting the church alight, and in the midst of all of this, I hear and see the leader of the pack speaking out to his men with a rough voice. "Gah ha ha! Get to it, lads! Grab anythin' that ain't nailed down, then put the rest to the torch!"

A young lady was cornered by him, the man holding an axe in his hand. "We gots an example to set for these Ylissean types! Ain't that right, lass?" He took her roughly by the arm, looking at her with hungry eyes.

"S-stay away from me! Please, someone help!", the maiden yells, struggling to escape the barbarian's grasp.

I growled in anger. Not only was my meal interrupted, but these poor people were being threatened by this trash. I couldn't let this go on further, so I step up to the plate. "You're right, you do have an example to set. The example is those who mess with these townspeople will pay for it in blood!"

The big man let go of the woman, his attention diverted towards me. "An who're you s'posed to be? You tryin to be some sorta hero?"

"Well, I'm no One Punch Man, but I'm sure I can handle a few brigands like you." I drew my blade and pointed it at him. "Why don't we test it then?", I reply, brandishing my blade.

He wasn't too happy about the response. "Well, If you truly insist: KILL HIM, BOYS!"

A barbarian rushes towards me and raises his axe. If Piccolo taught me anything, it's to always dodge. I sidestep his swing with ease, then impale his throat with my sword, and with a final cough of blood, he was done.

Following that were two myrmidons jumping to kill me, I taunted them with a cocky grin and a wave of the hand, but they were put down by two shouts of 'Thunder!', followed by two bolts of lightning.

Multiple shouts of thunder...It must be either Robin or Lion-O.

Eh? Anyone? ...I'll stop now.

Deadpool: …..uuuuugggggghhhhhh, that was so bad! Minus 2 points!

I look to see Robin, Chrom, Lissa, and Frederick rushing to the scene to eliminate the rest.

Robin had pale shaggy white hair, and to contrast it, he wore a cowled robe of dark purple colour, rimmed with gold trimming. Chrom was the blue-haired prince and descendant of the Hero-King. He wore a single-sleeved shirt with the right shoulder showing his Brand. His clothing was quite asymmetrical. Frederick had brown hair, wore blue armor of the Great Knight rank, and rode on a horse. Lastly, Lissa was the cleric of the group, and Chrom's little sister. She had two wild blonde pigtails, and wore what looked to be like a medieval maid's outfit, but the metal frame underneath told me that it was more suited for combat.

Chrom knocks away a lightning bolt shot at him and stabs the mage in the heart, then kicks him off of his blade. Robin burnt another one of the barbarians to a crisp with his magic, while Frederick picked off the rest swiftly with his lance. Not wasting a minute, I move up to Garrick, the boss. "Your thugs mean nothing. Now leave, or else you'll have to start picking out tombstones."

"Are you daft, boy?! I bow to no one!" Garrick charges me with many axe swings, all of which miss, and with my slimmer physique, I close the distance more and I slam him into the ground with my fist, then I stab him in the eye, ending his life.

I cleaned my blade of the filthy Plegian blood that stained the violet metal, being careful not to cut myself on the sharp weapon. Holding it up to the light, the blade glistened as good as new. Sheathing my sword carefully, I turn my head to the four who helped me during the fight. "Can I help you, Lord Chrom?"

"How did you-"

"That Brand on your shoulder is a dead giveaway."

Chrom was surprised, but understood afterwards. "Well, anyway, I would like to introduce you to the gang. I'm Chrom, but then again, you knew that. This is Lissa," he gestured to the young lady. "Frederick, our ever so loyal steward," next towards the large man in blue armour. "And, Robin, he is exceptionally gifted in tactics."

"Ahem," Frederick coughed. "If I may, milord, I am not a steward."

"You coddle the royal family to the point that you clear PEBBLES out of the way. If that doesn't say steward, I don't know what does." Chrom turned his attention back to me. "But I digress. I saw your skill with a blade. Your talents could be of use to us, and we were wondering if you'd be open to joining the Shepherds."

"Those brigands were Plegian, weren't they?"

"Yes."

I had confirmation. "Sure, why not? I'll join you."

"What does that have to do with the question?", Lissa wondered.

Wincing at the answer I had to that question, I just waved it off awkwardly, telling her it was nothing. "That's a little personal, I don't really feel like talking about it."

Frederick's brow furrowed and he set a drop dead glare onto me, placing an outstretched arm in front of the royal family and Robin. "Hold! We have no idea who you are and you refuse to give us answers! What prevents me from drawing your blood?"

"The fact that I saved your people even though they aren't mine."

"And on top of that," Chrom started, putting down Frederick's arm. "You received no orders to do so. If he saved some of our own, he is trustworthy enough in my eyes." Frederick continued his glare, but ultimately had to let it go for now.

In the square, a crowd cheered as we walked by. They came out of nowhere, probably hiding. An old man walked up to us. "Milord, please! You must stay the night! We are simple folk of simple means, but we would gladly toast your valor with a feast!"

Frederick, that's your cue to kill things.

"A most generous offer, sir, and no doubt your hospitality would be grand...But I'm afraid we must hurry back to Ylisstol."

"Ooh, we'd love to!" Lissa jumped for joy. "Dark meat only for me, medium well, and no salt in the soup. I simply…" She whipped her head in the knight's direction. "Wait, what?! We're not staying?! But, Frederick, it's nearly dark!" Lissa complained.

"Then when night falls, we'll camp. Eat off the land, make our bed of twigs and the like... I believe you mentioned you would be "getting used to this"?" Frederick retorted, an innocent Frederick grin on his face, but hidden behind it was a essence basically saying, "checkmate.".

"Frederick? Sometimes I hate you," she pouted, crossing her arms.

"You've quite the stern lieutenant there," Robin said.

"Yeah, well, "stern" is one name for it. I can think of a few others!" Lissa yelled. Shots fired, shots fired!

"Frederick only smiles when he's about to bring down the axe," Chrom pointed out.

"Duly noted," Robin and I replied in unison.

I could tell Frederick was annoyed. "Ahem. You do realize I AM still present?"

"Oh, we realize."

"Yep," I added.

"Milord remains as amusing as ever," Frederick commented dryly. "Now then, shall we be going?"

"All right, all right. Ready to go, you two? The capital isn't far."

"But before we go..." I objected. "I have a condition if I am to join the Shepherds."

"Go on," Chrom accepted.

"If I am to join, Mei Ling must join as well. I'll call her over. Mei Ling!" I shouted, followed by a rhythmic whistle. "She'll be here any moment now."

As soon as I finished, an armored bear rushes towards us. Chrom slowly reaches for Falchion, and Robin unsheathes his sword immediately. They rush to the bear, but before they could attack, I tackle them to the ground.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you two doing?! That IS Mei Ling! You guys have horses, I have a bear! Shit." I held them down, trying to restrain them and prevent them from attacking Mei Ling. I took their weapons, then got off of them. "Leave the bear alone."

We started to walk through the forest to get to the capital. It was sunset, and the day was getting dark. The very little sunlight barely poked through the green of the trees and many of the daylight animals began to disappear for the night.

"I told you, Frederick—it's getting dark already! My feet hurt! ...Ech! And now the bugs are out!"

Oh my gods, Lissa. STOP. COMPLAINING. You are in a travelling military force, and yet you can't withstand bugs?

"Noisy, disgusting bugs that buzz around and crawl all over and bite you when—Agh!" A bug flew right into Lissa's gaping, annoying mouth. "Won goph in mah mouph! Blech! Ptooey!"

Chrom wore a soft smile. "Aw, come on now, Lissa. Hardship builds character. Want to help me gather firewood?" Chrom asked.

"Tpht! Tpht! Yeeeeeuck! ...I think I swallowed it... I'll pass on finding firewood, thanks. I think I've built QUITE enough character for one day!" Lissa protested.

"We should probably think about food.", Robin suggested. "I don't know about you, but I'm starving." And now that I think about it, I'm a little hungry too.

"Yes, I should think a little hunting and gathering is in order," Frederick declared. "Now, who wants to clear a campsite?"

"Mmm... It's been too long since I last had bear meat. Delicious!" Chrom exclaimed. "Not too gamey, but has that wild animal feel." He looks away from the fire to see Mei Ling eating away at the meat vigorously. "Uh, Eric, does Mei Ling know that she's eating bear meat?"

"Yes, she does. She just doesn't care.", I replied. "Food is food to her."

"Oh. Well then…"

"There was this one time I caught her even trying to eat through metal bars," I laughed. "I still question what her digestive system looks like."

The prince and tactician laugh at my short story, then Chrom looks at his little sister, refusing to eat the meat. "What's wrong, Lissa? Dig in."

"Pass!" Lissa rejected the offer. "...Gods, couldn't you spear us an animal normal people eat for once? I mean, come on! Who eats bear?! You're meddling with the food chain. Right, Robin? ...Uh, Robin?"

She looks to see Robin savoring the meal, tearing viciously at the meat. *Munch, munch, slurp*

"C'mon, Eric, you have to agree with me, don't you?" Lissa pleaded.

*Chomp, chomp, munch* "I'm sorry, did you say something?"

She was alone on that front. "*Sigh* I suppose a person would enjoy just about anything after not eating for days..."

"Just eat it, Lissa. Meat is meat, and you need to keep your strength up," Chrom said.

"Those are words to live by," I added.

"Since when does meat smell like dung?! Hold on, even dung is an understatement!" she yelled.

"Every experience makes us stronger, milady. Even those we don't enjoy," Frederick told her.

"Really?", she questioned. "Then why don't I see YOU eating, Frederick?"

"Me? Oh, well... I'm not hungry. I...I had a large lunch! Yes, quite," Frederick lied.

"Ah..Ah..AH-CHOO! Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit," I commented.

"Yeah right, Frederick!" Lissa called out.

"Well, I'm going to sleep." I yawned after finishing my food, getting up. "I'm going to knock out up in the tree and try to sleep off the bear. If anything is wrong, just hit the tree or knock me down."

Narrator PoV

The prince shuffles around on the ground, unable to fall asleep. "...Huh?" Chrom awakens from his sleep. No pun intended.

Goodralisk: ….you hypocritical, pun-stealing bastard.

"What's wrong, Big Brother?" Lissa awakens from her own sleep with a yawn.

"Huh?" The blue haired prince scratched his head. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you, but... Something is amiss..." Chrom said.

She looked at him with concern. "Define 'something'".

"I'm not sure... I think I'll have a look around."

"Not alone, you won't! I'm coming too."

"Heh. Thanks, Lissa."

They were walking deeper into the woods, a far bit away from the campsite. Chrom looked up into the trees and around in the sky. There were no birds chirping, no animal movement, not even insects were audible. Something didn't feel right...

"It sure is dark. ...And quiet. Where did the birds go?" Lissa asks.

"Something is wrong here," Chrom said. Not a second later, the earth starts to shake violently.

"Aaah! Chrom!" Lissa yells.

"Gods, what—Agh, what is this madness?!" Chrom called, trying to regain his balance. "Stay close, Lissa!" Trees in the distance start to fall one by one. They resounded with a loud boom. Knowing the obvious danger, the best choice is to flee.

"Lissa, run," Chrom commanded. "I mean it, go!" The tremors continue as the ground from the quake lifts and spews lava, causing an instant forest fire. She runs from the site of the quake and Chrom guides her away from a huge burning tree. "This way!" They continued to run and dodge flaming pieces of wood, rock and whatever else they could.

They get to a clearing in the forest to rest, panting heavily. Lissa wiped the sweat off of her brow and raised her head, her eyes widening. "Chrom, what is that?!" Lissa screamed as she looked up at the smoky night sky to see a portal of some sort open up. Moments later, two humanoid creatures appear out of the portal and fall to the ground, then they rise up. They had dark, almost purplish skin with the occasional stitch running along it, and had red, glowing eyes.

One of them roars a mighty roar and black mist spews forth from its mouth. One of them rush towards Chrom and Lissa. "Lissa. Stand back," Chrom ordered as he drew Falchion. "I'll take care of this."

My PoV

I slept like a child on the tree branch I laid on. I took a deep breath unconsciously, and I got a lungful of smoke, waking up by my own coughing fit. "Damned asthma." I was barely able to compose a sentence, but I froze once I saw the scene before me.

"What the hell is going"-I was cut short by a flaming branch collapsing onto the branch I was sleeping on.

"Oh. Great. We're at that part." I look down to see Frederick awake, but Robin was still asleep.

"Robin! Wake the HELL up!" I yelled as I threw a small branch at his head.

"Owww… Why did you—What…is…going on?" Robin asked as he realized what was going on around him.

"There is a forest fire and milord and milady isn't here!" Frederick yelled.

That's all I needed. "Shepherds, assemble!" I announced. Rip-off of The Avengers? Yes, it was needed.

I jumped off of the branch and Mei Ling rushed to my side. "Robin, come on!" I shouted, gesturing him to ride the bear with me to the scene.

"Wait, how do we find them?", Robin questioned. At that moment, the sky darkened even more so that even the flames weren't bright. A portal opened in the sky in the distance.

"Well then. There's our lead. Let us make haste!" Frederick exclaimed.

The fighter zombie-humanoid jumped to land an overhead axe swing on Chrom, but he sidestepped it and slashed it in a wide arc. However, it seemed to remain unaffected, and twisted its head 180 degrees to face Chrom, who was behind him. The creature attacked again, this time slashing to Chrom's right, and Chrom blocks it, struggling against it. He manages to push it off and it turns around from the force, allowing him to push the creature over. As it tries to get up, Chrom flicks his sword, pounces on his foe and stabs him in the back, finally killing it.

Chrom rests himself on his sword, but was alerted by his sister's scream. He looks over to see another one of them closing in on Lissa, backing her into a tree. "Lissa!" The creature raises his axe to kill her, but behind him in the portal, a person runs and jumps out to Lissa's rescue and defends her, blocking the zombie's axe with his blade. He wore a mask, and donned clothing similar to Chrom's.

"Don't just stand there! Help!" he yelled to Chrom, struggling to block the offender's lethal blow.

"Right!" The undead creature was distracted by Chrom charging towards it, and so it let up the pressure on Marth. With a twirl from him, and a swing from the prince, they both delivered a fatal slash to the creature, ending the immediate threat. "Quite an entrance. What is your name?" Chrom asked.

Before anything else was said, Frederick, Robin and I get there. "Milord! Milady! Are you hurt?", Frederick asked, wanting confirmation of the prince and princess' safety.

"Frederick! Robin! And Eric!", Lissa exclaimed.

"What in the blazes are these things?" Robin inquired, semi-curious and semi-horrified at the horde of undead warriors ahead.

"Whatever they are, they're not from Ylisse, I promise you that," Chrom answered.

"It's a relief that no one is injured..." Frederick, you worry too much for your—or anyone else's—good.

"Thank the masked man who saved me!" Lissa said. "If it wasn't for him, I'd be..." Then she noticed that he wasn't anywhere to be found. "Hey, where did he go?"

"We can worry about him later, AFTER we put these grotesque creatures...to the blade," Frederick announced, a ghost smile creeping upon his lips. "Eyes open, now. We know nothing about this enemy." You mean you know nothing of the enemy. All the same, now we're talking. A battle. I'm looking forward to this. "Let's do this!" I shouted.

Before we rushed them, someone approached us. "Captain Chrom! I'm here to kick some ass!" I recognized that voice. A certain redheaded woman that could put any man to shame with her sailor mouth. "All right, you ash-faced freaks! Which one of ya wants to try my lance on for size first?"

Yep, that was Sully, all right. The crimson cavalier. And if she's here, then that must mean…. "I know just the spot for it: shoved right up your—"

"Hold, milady!"

Great… The Ranger-job Ringabel. Virion.

"Huh?" she looked over, bemused. She finally focused her gaze upon a blue haired man with fancy clothes, long blue hair and a bow in his back. He took a knee and held out his hand towards the redhead.

"Life may be long, but attraction is fleeting! Would you leave me in your sweet dust? Leave war to the warriors, dear bird! A beauty such as you need wage only love," the archer said with a husky, French-sounding accent. Or here, it's called Rosannean.

Where's a cock-blocking Croagunk when you need one?

"...The hell are you?!" she asked.

"Ha! Is the lady intrigued?" Virion bellowed in his pompous self-confident tone. "Of course you are—it's only natural. I am myth and legend! I am he who strides large across history's greatest stage! The man who puts the "arch" in "archer"! My name, dear lady, is Vi—"

"Hey, hey, I'll listen to your speech some other time, Ruffles, but I have some dirtbags to put down. Hyah!" she called as she tugged on the reins, causing her horse to stand up on its hind legs.

"Virion! ...Er, my name. It's Virion. W-wait! Where are you going? Pray, at least tell me your name!" he beckoned before she left to fight.

"I'm Sully," she answered. "Sully C. Myller, leader of Squadron 10 of the Ylissean Guard, and honorary Shepherd."

""Sully"! How divine! A lovely name, owned by an even lovelier flower. Will you marry me, my dearest Sully?"

Ugh. He even hit on girls the same way Brock does. The red headed cavalier gave Virion a deadpan "What the fuck" look. "Will I what now? Oh wait, I get it... This is a joke. And when I put my fist through your face—that's the punchline."

He raised his hands casually. "I realize my manly figure and noble bearing can be overwhelming. 'Tis common! So please, don't feel pressured to answer right a—"

How's THIS for an answer, you pompous twat?!" she yells as she kicks Virion square in the face, barreling him to the side a few feet.

"Sully! As annoying as he may seem, you're fighting the wrong person," I yell back to her. "And Virion! Pick up what's left of your dignity and save the flirting for after!"

Well, I felt that some parts were good as they were, but I did make sure to change what content I felt needed improvement. These all may take a while so please bear with me.

Deadpool: Aren't you forgetting something?

Goodralisk: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me. Goodralisk out.

Deadpool: Dick.