Disclaimer: No I do not own Gundam or Gundam Wing.
It was a quiet day in the Sank Kingdom. A loud noise then followed the peaceful silence. "Look at these, look at these!" Relina yelled. "Tell me Heero what are these?" "New mission orders from Dr. J," Heero responded. "No, they're bills!" screeched Relina. "First for busting Duo's speakers, then Quatre's medical bill for 'accidentally' shooting him in the leg, and the casino repair!" "Trowa and I made an attempt to stop Quatre. And Quatre has a lot of money, so why doesn't he pay for the repair? He did it," Heero said in an emotionless voice. "But you shot him in the leg the day after, and he's now out of it for a while! Anyway, how are you going to get rid of these? The Sank Kingdom can't pay for it all," Relina explained. "Bomb all the banks! I'll get my Wing gundam!" Heero answered running to the door. "No, you will work for your money like a normal person," protested Relina. "What?! Be normal? Hummm? No, as Wufie would say, ' that is evil, EVil, EVIL! EVIL I TELL YOU!' So no," Heero thought. "No, I can not be normal," Heero answered. He then saw Relina's eyes narrow more and felt a gloomy atmosphere in the room. "Well. I guess I could be normal for once, he, he," Heero cracked a smile as he sat back down. "Then go get a JOB!" Relina demanded in a loud voice. Heero made a mad dash toward the door and quickly ran to buy a newspaper. Heero franticly searched for a job in the Adds section. "Hmm, help wanted. Car mechanic at Dr. J's Auto Service shop," Heero read aloud to himself. "I guess so." So, Heero told Relina, who was over joyed, and he applied. "So you're Heero Yuy huh?" a fat man behind a desk said. "Is that your real name?" "Heero Yuy is my code name, sir. My real name is unknown to all, even myself," Heero answered. "Well I'm sorry son, but we can't have low rate men who steel people's names," the large man said as he took a large bite of a doughnut. "Um, yes I think you can," Heero insisted. "Nope, sorry son," the man said as pieces of doughnut flew out of the man's over filled mouth. "YES, you can," Heero said as he reached into his pocket and made a clicking sound. "Uh. well yeah I guess we can! UH, ha, ha!" the man said with a forced smile. "W. well I expect ya in here to.to. tomorrow. S.see ya!"
RING! RING! "Heeeeeeello! This is Duo's Dirty Dump, Duo speaking!" a cocky voice said picking up a phone. "No sorry sir we're not a pluming service. You see the word 'Dump' in the store's name means junkyard. (Silence) EW! NO WAY! WE DON'T SELL SEX TOYS! WHO IS THIS?" The other line then hung up. Duo slammed the phone back on its hook. "Another person calling and thinking that this was a pluming service or porn shop?" Hilde asked. "Yep," Duo said as Hilde put another tally on a sheet of paper. "That's the 30th time," Hilde said looking back up. "Man, it's so hard to sell junk these days," Duo replied with his head down. "I have just the thing that could turn this place around!" Hilde happily said. "What?!" Duo exclaimed. "A medium sized nuclear war head! Just bomb a colony and then they'll be beg'n you for junk and parts!" exclaimed Hilde. "WHAT!? START ANOTHER WAR?!" Duo yelled in a hard tone. "Why that's the greatest idea! That's why you're my girl Hild!" Duo said as he ran over an quickly made out with Hilde then ran for his gundam. "Fire a way on my count!" Duo yelled back as he ran down the hall for his gundam. "I love it when he makes out with me!" Hilde said as she smiled and blushed.
MEANWHILE.
"Now let your inner energy just flow through you," a voice commanded calmly. Two people stood in a stance inside a classic Chinese dojo room. "Now lift your leg and bring it around and stand up straight. Oh and do it slowly." A boy brought his left leg around then fell to his butt. "OWWWW!!!" he yelled in pain. "Dang it you weakling! What's your problem?" the Chinese leader said turning and looking down at his student. "My.my leg! It hurts so much! I thought Yoga helped heal!" Quatre cried. "WHAT?!" Wufie yelled in a hard voice. "Yoga is not for healing! It's for you to gain inner peace and integrity and nonweakness! Which you lack young Wussy." "So you're saying that I . OW. wasted $1,000 on enrollment for nothing?" Quatre said in pain and anger. "Well not nothing," Wufie answered. "I was able to buy this cool model kit of my gundam." "AH WAAAAAA! I WANT MY 39 TEST TUBE SISTERS!" Quatre whined. "Do I get paid extra for putting up with your whining?" asked Wufie. "NO!" Quatre lashed out. "But I will pay you for some info." "Okay, shoot," Wufie said. "Master Wufie, where can I find h." Quatre began. "No, no," Wufie said. "Remember rule 22 of page 1,683 in paragraph 2 in sentence 16." "Oh yeah: While in dojo you must address me (Wufie) as Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie," Quatre quoted. "Good job Young Wussy, now follow it," Wufie demanded. "Oh Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie, where might I find." Quatre began again. "NO! WRONG! Rule 43 of page 2,999 in paragraph 9 of sentence 4," replied Wufie interrupting. "Ugh: While in dojo, follow rule 22 and talk in old English or old Chinese (if you can speak Chinese) when speaking to the Sensei," Quatre quoted again. "Quality," Wufie said. "Okay. Oh Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie, where art thou find thyself a secret martial art that will heal thyself?" Quatre asked. "Good job Young Wussy!" Wufie said happily. "Do you wish to know a martial art which will help you grow strong again?" "Yes, yes!" Quatre chanted happily halfway standing up. "Try," Wufie answered. "Sports' Medicine." Quatre then had an anime fall and a large sweat drop appeared on his head.
"Hello there young man," a monotone voice said as a couple and their son walked into a gym. "Welcome to Trowa's Gymnastics gym!" "Yes, Mr. Trowa, we would like to enroll our son in a class. But first we want to know what you do here," the father asked. "Well sir," Trowa began. "I'm not gay to start. And two, I don't allow gay boys into my gym. But anyway, here at TGG (Trowa's Gymnastics Gym) we teach boys and girls from age six to 20! We also teach children on how to pet wild beasts, such as untamed lions in cages!" Soon a loud crunch followed by a high-pitched scream came. Soon a little girl in a leotard walked up to Trowa. "Mr. Trowa, the ragging wild lion bit off my hand. It's now bleeding uncontrollably," the girl said holding a bloody stub up to Trowa. "Suck it up kid! 'Tis a flesh wound! It builds character anyway," Trowa snapped. "Uh we'll call you Mr. Trowa," the mom said. "Uh okay, hope to hear from you soon," Trowa replied.
The next day for Heero came soon and he was not too happy, but went anyway. "So you had any experience with machines?" the fat man asked. "I was a gundam pilot," Heero replied. "Okay, hey, here's a customer now," the fat man said as he walked off to grab another doughnut.
"Hello sir and welcome to Dr. J's Auto Service shop, I'm Heero Yuy, how can I help you?" Heero asked the man. "Yeah, can you install the Onstar System into my car?" the man asked.
"Hmm, what's this Onstar System?" Heero asked. "You know, the ONSTAR SYSTEM?" the man said. "Okay," Heero said. "I'll get right to it sir. Please wait about half an hour." So Heero brought the car in and he worked on it for half an hour. "All done sir," Heero called to the man. "Thank you son, here's a tip," the man replied as he put a five dollar bill into Heero's hand then drove off. Five o'clock soon rolled around and Heero went back to the Sanc Kingdom. When he entered, Heero found Relina sitting in front of the TV. "So, how was your day Heero? Make a lot of money?" the girl asked in her cheerful voice as she jumped into Heero's face. "Okay," Heero said as he plopped down on the couch. Heero channel surfed until he go to the daily news. He saw numerous cars off the road and woman interviewing a driver. "Hey isn't that the man from earlier?" Heero asked himself. He turned up the volume. "So what happened again?" the reporter asked. "Well, I was on the highway and I wanted to find a store. So I switched on my newly installed Onstar System. But instead of having that hot chick's voice asking me what information I needed, all the windows went bright yellow. I could the predict all the other drivers' moves! I went crazy and began to run people off the road. And for some odd reason I ran only Ford Taruses off the road," the man said in horror. "Crazy lunatic, I mean its not like the Zero System was installed instead right Heero?" Relina asked. "Uh yeah," was all Heero could say.
"And in other world news," the news anchor on TV began. "Colony X92-43 was hit by a nuclear warhead and attacked by a . uh. god of death who declared war." Heero just sighed and threw his head back.
END
It was a quiet day in the Sank Kingdom. A loud noise then followed the peaceful silence. "Look at these, look at these!" Relina yelled. "Tell me Heero what are these?" "New mission orders from Dr. J," Heero responded. "No, they're bills!" screeched Relina. "First for busting Duo's speakers, then Quatre's medical bill for 'accidentally' shooting him in the leg, and the casino repair!" "Trowa and I made an attempt to stop Quatre. And Quatre has a lot of money, so why doesn't he pay for the repair? He did it," Heero said in an emotionless voice. "But you shot him in the leg the day after, and he's now out of it for a while! Anyway, how are you going to get rid of these? The Sank Kingdom can't pay for it all," Relina explained. "Bomb all the banks! I'll get my Wing gundam!" Heero answered running to the door. "No, you will work for your money like a normal person," protested Relina. "What?! Be normal? Hummm? No, as Wufie would say, ' that is evil, EVil, EVIL! EVIL I TELL YOU!' So no," Heero thought. "No, I can not be normal," Heero answered. He then saw Relina's eyes narrow more and felt a gloomy atmosphere in the room. "Well. I guess I could be normal for once, he, he," Heero cracked a smile as he sat back down. "Then go get a JOB!" Relina demanded in a loud voice. Heero made a mad dash toward the door and quickly ran to buy a newspaper. Heero franticly searched for a job in the Adds section. "Hmm, help wanted. Car mechanic at Dr. J's Auto Service shop," Heero read aloud to himself. "I guess so." So, Heero told Relina, who was over joyed, and he applied. "So you're Heero Yuy huh?" a fat man behind a desk said. "Is that your real name?" "Heero Yuy is my code name, sir. My real name is unknown to all, even myself," Heero answered. "Well I'm sorry son, but we can't have low rate men who steel people's names," the large man said as he took a large bite of a doughnut. "Um, yes I think you can," Heero insisted. "Nope, sorry son," the man said as pieces of doughnut flew out of the man's over filled mouth. "YES, you can," Heero said as he reached into his pocket and made a clicking sound. "Uh. well yeah I guess we can! UH, ha, ha!" the man said with a forced smile. "W. well I expect ya in here to.to. tomorrow. S.see ya!"
RING! RING! "Heeeeeeello! This is Duo's Dirty Dump, Duo speaking!" a cocky voice said picking up a phone. "No sorry sir we're not a pluming service. You see the word 'Dump' in the store's name means junkyard. (Silence) EW! NO WAY! WE DON'T SELL SEX TOYS! WHO IS THIS?" The other line then hung up. Duo slammed the phone back on its hook. "Another person calling and thinking that this was a pluming service or porn shop?" Hilde asked. "Yep," Duo said as Hilde put another tally on a sheet of paper. "That's the 30th time," Hilde said looking back up. "Man, it's so hard to sell junk these days," Duo replied with his head down. "I have just the thing that could turn this place around!" Hilde happily said. "What?!" Duo exclaimed. "A medium sized nuclear war head! Just bomb a colony and then they'll be beg'n you for junk and parts!" exclaimed Hilde. "WHAT!? START ANOTHER WAR?!" Duo yelled in a hard tone. "Why that's the greatest idea! That's why you're my girl Hild!" Duo said as he ran over an quickly made out with Hilde then ran for his gundam. "Fire a way on my count!" Duo yelled back as he ran down the hall for his gundam. "I love it when he makes out with me!" Hilde said as she smiled and blushed.
MEANWHILE.
"Now let your inner energy just flow through you," a voice commanded calmly. Two people stood in a stance inside a classic Chinese dojo room. "Now lift your leg and bring it around and stand up straight. Oh and do it slowly." A boy brought his left leg around then fell to his butt. "OWWWW!!!" he yelled in pain. "Dang it you weakling! What's your problem?" the Chinese leader said turning and looking down at his student. "My.my leg! It hurts so much! I thought Yoga helped heal!" Quatre cried. "WHAT?!" Wufie yelled in a hard voice. "Yoga is not for healing! It's for you to gain inner peace and integrity and nonweakness! Which you lack young Wussy." "So you're saying that I . OW. wasted $1,000 on enrollment for nothing?" Quatre said in pain and anger. "Well not nothing," Wufie answered. "I was able to buy this cool model kit of my gundam." "AH WAAAAAA! I WANT MY 39 TEST TUBE SISTERS!" Quatre whined. "Do I get paid extra for putting up with your whining?" asked Wufie. "NO!" Quatre lashed out. "But I will pay you for some info." "Okay, shoot," Wufie said. "Master Wufie, where can I find h." Quatre began. "No, no," Wufie said. "Remember rule 22 of page 1,683 in paragraph 2 in sentence 16." "Oh yeah: While in dojo you must address me (Wufie) as Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie," Quatre quoted. "Good job Young Wussy, now follow it," Wufie demanded. "Oh Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie, where might I find." Quatre began again. "NO! WRONG! Rule 43 of page 2,999 in paragraph 9 of sentence 4," replied Wufie interrupting. "Ugh: While in dojo, follow rule 22 and talk in old English or old Chinese (if you can speak Chinese) when speaking to the Sensei," Quatre quoted again. "Quality," Wufie said. "Okay. Oh Wise, not too old, very good martial artist, highest of all in integrity and honor, Sensei Wufie, where art thou find thyself a secret martial art that will heal thyself?" Quatre asked. "Good job Young Wussy!" Wufie said happily. "Do you wish to know a martial art which will help you grow strong again?" "Yes, yes!" Quatre chanted happily halfway standing up. "Try," Wufie answered. "Sports' Medicine." Quatre then had an anime fall and a large sweat drop appeared on his head.
"Hello there young man," a monotone voice said as a couple and their son walked into a gym. "Welcome to Trowa's Gymnastics gym!" "Yes, Mr. Trowa, we would like to enroll our son in a class. But first we want to know what you do here," the father asked. "Well sir," Trowa began. "I'm not gay to start. And two, I don't allow gay boys into my gym. But anyway, here at TGG (Trowa's Gymnastics Gym) we teach boys and girls from age six to 20! We also teach children on how to pet wild beasts, such as untamed lions in cages!" Soon a loud crunch followed by a high-pitched scream came. Soon a little girl in a leotard walked up to Trowa. "Mr. Trowa, the ragging wild lion bit off my hand. It's now bleeding uncontrollably," the girl said holding a bloody stub up to Trowa. "Suck it up kid! 'Tis a flesh wound! It builds character anyway," Trowa snapped. "Uh we'll call you Mr. Trowa," the mom said. "Uh okay, hope to hear from you soon," Trowa replied.
The next day for Heero came soon and he was not too happy, but went anyway. "So you had any experience with machines?" the fat man asked. "I was a gundam pilot," Heero replied. "Okay, hey, here's a customer now," the fat man said as he walked off to grab another doughnut.
"Hello sir and welcome to Dr. J's Auto Service shop, I'm Heero Yuy, how can I help you?" Heero asked the man. "Yeah, can you install the Onstar System into my car?" the man asked.
"Hmm, what's this Onstar System?" Heero asked. "You know, the ONSTAR SYSTEM?" the man said. "Okay," Heero said. "I'll get right to it sir. Please wait about half an hour." So Heero brought the car in and he worked on it for half an hour. "All done sir," Heero called to the man. "Thank you son, here's a tip," the man replied as he put a five dollar bill into Heero's hand then drove off. Five o'clock soon rolled around and Heero went back to the Sanc Kingdom. When he entered, Heero found Relina sitting in front of the TV. "So, how was your day Heero? Make a lot of money?" the girl asked in her cheerful voice as she jumped into Heero's face. "Okay," Heero said as he plopped down on the couch. Heero channel surfed until he go to the daily news. He saw numerous cars off the road and woman interviewing a driver. "Hey isn't that the man from earlier?" Heero asked himself. He turned up the volume. "So what happened again?" the reporter asked. "Well, I was on the highway and I wanted to find a store. So I switched on my newly installed Onstar System. But instead of having that hot chick's voice asking me what information I needed, all the windows went bright yellow. I could the predict all the other drivers' moves! I went crazy and began to run people off the road. And for some odd reason I ran only Ford Taruses off the road," the man said in horror. "Crazy lunatic, I mean its not like the Zero System was installed instead right Heero?" Relina asked. "Uh yeah," was all Heero could say.
"And in other world news," the news anchor on TV began. "Colony X92-43 was hit by a nuclear warhead and attacked by a . uh. god of death who declared war." Heero just sighed and threw his head back.
END