Title: Coming Out Singing
Author: K00K
Rating: PG-13
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Puck x Kurt
Genre: Romance/Humor
Warning: Language, suggestive Puck-ness.
Spoilers: Uh, Kurt joined the football team?
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.
Author Notes: I had to fill this, I couldn't resist. The song is just too cute and too puckurt. I changed 'football pitch' to 'football field' because…well, the story's about American football, not European football. (And, obviously, I changed 'Johnny' to 'Noah'…and I changed 'game they're gonna win' to 'game they're gonna lose' because, honestly, we're talking about McKinley's football team. They're going to lose.) I'm also going to dub this semi-crackish. I couldn't take it seriously enough until about halfway through.
Summary: Prompt: "Kurt singing this to Puck in Glee...don't mind what else happens, or if you want him to sing "Noah" not "Johnny", or the tone or the reason he does it or the state of their relationship at the time...the song just rocks! –insert link to Football Song by Matt Fishel-" Kurt stumbles upon a song that's an absolutely perfect way to out him and Puck to the glee club.
Kurt sighed as he waved at his boyfriend from across the hall. Puck glanced him over, nodding a bit before going back to whatever his football buddies were saying. This was starting to piss him off and...well, maybe some of it was his fault.
Puck wanted to come out of the closet. He didn't.
It wasn't that he wasn't proud to be dating Noah, not at all, he just didn't want the boy going through the constant torture Kurt was. It wouldn't be fair if he had the option of living his high school career the way he was: accepted.
But...Puck was just as stubborn as he was. He even threatened to break up with him, but Kurt knew he wouldn't. Despite the constant feud, they were pretty happy together. He glanced over again just in time to see Noah toss him a grin. He smiled back, rolling his eyes at his boyfriend's stupid expression before turning towards his homeroom. They were happy...maybe, just maybe, their happiness could outweigh the rejection.
But he'd have to start small. Mercedes, their parents and Rachel were the only ones that knew. (Rachel only because having two gay dads boosted her gay-dar to the point where she was practically cornering Puck daily trying to out him.) Maybe they'd just come out to glee club first. They were most definitely going to be accepted there, maybe aside from Finn and Quinn. (He wouldn't blame them for feeling a little betrayed by Puck's sudden interest in the opposite sex-more so Quinn.)
The question was, though, how?
He couldn't just say it, that would be completely lame and anti-climatic. While Noah would be happy to be out, though he'd deny it beyond his grave he was just as much a diva as Kurt sometimes. And glee was about singing your feelings, right?
But how many songs were there about coming out as a couple to your friends? He could find a meaningful love song to serenade him with, but it just…it wouldn't be enough.
Kurt tried to rid his mind of the thoughts, for his grades' sake, but it was no use. By seventh period, he had completely given up on trying to pay attention.
When he finally arrived home, he went immediately to the internet. What else would have the answers to his woes? Unfortunately, googling 'songs to help come out with your boyfriend' wasn't very helpful. Just as he was about to sign off and start his homework (that he had no idea how to do, now), Mercedes instant messaged him with a link and a note: 'found the answer to your troubles, white boy.'
He rolled his eyes at her, figuring it was most likely a joke, but clicked the link anyway. A YouTube video opened up, and an actor(/singer, apparently) from some show Mercedes liked began singing on screen. He felt his head tilt a bit, letting the lyrics sink it.
Well, shit.
It was perfect.
Sending his best friend a very enthusiastic thank-you, he typed up the lyrics (the song wasn't very popular, so he couldn't just copy/paste them) and ultimately forgot about his homework as he practiced. Yes, his grades would suffer just the tiniest bit, but this was important to Noah, so it was important to him.
The next day in glee, after talking several of his teachers into letting him do a makeup assignment, including Mr. Schue, he pulled the man aside and asked if he could perform something he was working on. Quickly realizing this was why Kurt didn't do his homework, Mr. Schue agreed, telling him he was off the hook for makeup work.
"It's about time someone put some effort into their glee assignments," he muttered when Kurt enquired why. "All right, everyone, listen up. Kurt has something he'd like to perform."
Kurt took the floor, grinning ear to ear, bowing gallantly as Mercedes wolf-whistled. He spread the music sheets he'd written out on the piano, gracefully sitting himself down on the bench. "I only started working on this yesterday, so please excuse me if I mess up on the piano."
"You got this," Puck grinned, causing a few confused but entertained stares. And, really, that was all the confidence he needed. He placed his fingers on the ivories, closing his eyes for just a moment before starting in.
I'm sitting on the back of the football bus,
All the lads are wearing shorts and shin-pads.
Talking 'bout the game they're gonna lose this afternoon.
And all this display of masculinity,
Well it's making me feel a bit nauseous.
So I close my eyes and I pray it'll be over soon.
Now I have never functioned well at a competitive sport,
I just can't find the fun.
And besides I'm far too paranoid about the way I look when I run.
He could hear the jocks snicker behind their hands, knowing that so far, this was all too true. It was no shock that Kurt despised football.
So I sit here combing my hair,
Trying my hardest not to stare,
But it's getting cold out, and who would suppose...
I will never be captain but I will be King,
And I'm gonna achieve the most wonderful things
That don't involve playing football in the rain.
I will never be one of the lads on the team.
But I'll conquer the system and fight for my dreams.
And I don't know if I could ever win,
But I'm gonna be the best there's ever been.
And Noah is the head of our football team,
He always boasts to his friends about women.
I wonder if he'd carry on that way if I told them all the places we'd been in.
Noah struts around on the football field,
With an arrogant smirk on his face.
But he wears a smile of different kind,
When he comes to stay over at my place.
And I'll sit there combing my hair, while he's taking off his underwear
And it's getting warm out, til the whistle blows...
Noah is captain and Noah is King,
And his parents are hopeful for wonderful things
That don't involve him screwing 'round with me.
Noah's the best looking lad on the team,
All the guys wanna be him, he's every girl's dream.
And no I don't think I will ever win,
But I'm gonna be the best there's ever been.
I'm sitting on the back of the football bus and I wonder 'Will it ever change?'
Kurt realized he had gotten far too into the song and looked up, trying to gauge the reaction of his friends. Mercedes and Rachel were giggling with smug expressions, obviously feeling superior that they'd already known. Finn was looking back and forth between Kurt, Puck and Mike and Matt furiously, as if asking, did you know?
Quinn looked…shocked, to say the least, and a wee bit uncomfortable and embarrassed (for she was now carrying a gay man's baby), but wasn't furious as he'd expected. She sent him a weak but encouraging smile and nod. He smiled back warmly. Quinn wasn't a bad person, not really.
Mike and Matt looked bemused, and Mike went as far as throwing Kurt a playful thumbs up to show their support. Tina, Artie, Santana and Brittany were smiling (after Santana had patiently explained to Brittany what the song meant) and Brittany went as far as leaping up and throwing herself in Kurt's unsuspecting arms.
"I always knew Puck was gay!" she exclaimed, giggling. "I told you, Sanny!" The Latina smiled uncharacteristically gently, nodding in recognition. "Yay for Kurt getting a boyfriend!" She kissed him on the cheek, flouncing back to her seat. Kurt smiled fondly at the blonde, letting his eyes trail back to the face that mattered most. He cleared his throat a bit as Puck gazed at him with heated, dark eyes.
"I know you wanted to come out, to everyone, and…I'm sorry I didn't want to and I was forcing you to keep us a secret." A bashful, pink blush crept over his pale, clear cheeks. "I just…don't want you to go through what I have to every day. But if it's something you want so badly you're willing to risk a fight almost daily…I'd rather be slushied with you than fight with you." He averted his eyes for a moment, catching Finn's calculating gaze. The poor boy. "And…I know I'm not exactly making out with you in the hallways, but…I figured coming out to our friends first was a step. And I'll be more than happy to come out with you to the rest of the school."
The girls (and Mike and Matt) cooed over Kurt's confession, looking over to Puck, whose stare never left Kurt. He was practically beaming, leaning back in his chair confidently. Mr. Schue stood back up, looking pleased.
"Guys, this is what we're looking for. Meaningful, emotion-driven performances. I feel like Kurt's been the only one listening to me for the past month," he chuckled, but it fell short when Rachel's hand shot in the air.
"In my defense, Mr. S, you haven't heard my performance yet, and I assure it will-"
"Yes, yes, Rachel," Mr. Schue smiled, motioning her to calm down as if training a puppy. A few giggles erupted from the group, but the brunette held her head high, at least looking content with getting her two cents in.
When all eyes reverted back to Kurt, he felt his blush return, and quickly took his seat between Mercedes and Puck, who smirked and 'stretched', resting his arm across the back of Kurt's chair. The boy blushed, but eagerly leaned into the open invitation. More coos and giggles broke out.
"All right, guys, leave the newlyweds alone. Is there anyone else who'd like to show us what they got?"
And just like that, things went back to normal. Rachel sang a heartfelt Broadway hit, Tina and Artie sang a duet and before Kurt could sort out the thoughts zooming through his mind, glee was over and everyone was filing out. (But, of course, not before giving Kurt and Puck one final congratulations before leaving.) The couple waited patiently for everyone to leave, waving goodbye to a satisfied Mr. Schue.
And soon they were alone.
Before Kurt could get a word out, Puck had him up against the piano, one hand each trapping his waist against the instrument. Their lips messaged one another lazily, leisurely, taking a moment to just feel. Finally, needing to breath, Puck pulled away and rested his forehead against the countertenor's. Kurt didn't dare speak-even throughout their relationship, Puck rarely got all gooey-emotional, unless it was channeled through rage-he let his boyfriend sort his emotions out quietly.
Suddenly, he felt Puck take in particularly heavy breath against his chest and let it out over his ear. "Thank you," he finally breathed, so softly Kurt had to wonder if he'd imagined it. "You know that I wanted…I know you weren't keeping us a secret 'cause you were like-ashamed of me or something, but…I can't help but…"
Kurt smiled up at him through his lashes, standing up on his toes to press another chaste kiss to his boyfriend's welcoming lips. "I love you, Noah, I could never be ashamed of you. I just don't want you to have to go through the shit I go through…it doesn't seem fair to me. It should, since you contributed to my torture for quite a few years, but I could never bring myself to even think of hurting you…I guess I sort of realized I was hurting you by not coming out…" He clamped his mouth shut, realizing he was rambling.
Puck smirked down at him. "Love you, too, babe," he murmured, tonguing the shell of Kurt's ear. The countertenor shrieked in response, playfully pushing the jock off of him.
"Jesus, Noah, not here. Well…" Puck's eyes lit up. "Not now. I have some makeup work to do tonight."
"You just promised. This is a verbal contract that you'll let me fuck you in the choir room in the near future." Kurt rolled his eyes at how serious his boyfriend was. Why couldn't he take math this serious?
"We'll see. C'mon, I'll let you buy me ice cream on the way home," he giggled, tugging on his tanned hand. They gathered their bags and sauntered out of the choir room (making sure the door was locked, as Mr. Schue requested) and into the parking lot. Quinn was parked a few spots down from Kurt, and Mike, Matt and Brittany surrounded her car. They all waved goodbye enthusiastically, cheering crudely when Puck swatted Kurt's ass as he got into the car. He rolled his eyes as he pulled out, but kept a small smile to himself.
He shot a look at Puck, who was staring out the window and idly humming the song Kurt had performed, and smiled again. If coming out to glee had made Noah this happy…coming out to the school was definitely worth anything the jocks could throw at him. "So where'd you find the song? I can't imagine you found that in one night."
"Mercedes sent it to me...I think she's known about it for awhile. You...I mean you liked the song, right?" He didn't know why he asked. Of course Noah liked it, he had just practically assaulted him back in the choir room.
"Of course I did, babe. If I knew you were planning on coming out, I wouldn't have expected anything less."
"Well, in the true Kurt Hummel fashion, if I'm going to come out, I'm going to come out singing."
*cringe* That is one of the corniest endings I've ever done. Literally, I hate it. But I like the rest, for what it is.