This is my first story on here under this user name. The last time I wrote here was maybe three years ago? I went to my old account to reread my old stuff, but to my disappointment, I had deleted everything before I left it. Oh well. Fresh start, I suppose.
This is a oneshot mainly in Edward's point of view. I might make a full length story loosely based on this, but in Alphonse's point of view, later on.
Also, I do not own any of the characters from Fullmetal Alchemist.
The wind was raw. It cut across his face like blades, leaving his skin a bright red. Tears leaked from the corners of his topaz eyes. He tried to convince himself that it was because of the wind, but he knew better.
It was because he was leaving Germany, his home away from home. Him and his younger brother, Alphonse, had taken a train to the west coast of France and boarded the earliest ship to North America. Europe was getting too dangerous, and he had had a bad feeling about staying there. It seemed too much like another Ishbal, another Lior. Still, it was hard to leave it behind and go into the unknown.
It was also because of something else that had been haunting him since he returned from Amestris for the last time with Alphonse. Except it wasn't something, it was someone. He would never get to see that someone again…
"Brother?" a familiar voice called from behind him. Edward waited a moment to compose himself, then looked over his shoulder.
"Yeah, Al?"
Alphonse was bundled up in two coats and a thick scarf, his hands jammed in the coat pockets and his feet stamping the ship deck to try and fight off the blistering cold. His short dirty blonde hair blew wildly in the wind and his grey eyes squinted against the bright sunrise.
"What are you doing out here so early? It's freezing!" he called as he stomped over to his older brother.
Edward shrugged, and tried to brush his long golden blonde hair out of his face with a gloved hand. The wind promptly blew it right back where it had been a second before. "I wanted to see the sun come up."
Alphonse sighed and stood beside him by the rail of the ship. The water surrounding them was a threatening black that moved angrily in the early morning light. The whitecaps of the larger waves sprayed foam up at the ship, but the hull was too high for any spray to reach the two teens.
"Still no sign of land," Alphonse moaned as he burrowed his face into the scarf around his neck. A small sigh of relief worked its way through the fabric and into the air.
"You don't have to be out here, Al."
"I wanted to keep you company, Ed. That, or try to convince you to come inside out of the cold. Aren't you freezing? You aren't even wearing a scarf," Al said, eying Edward cautiously. The older brother felt his eyes on him, and know that he had seen the tears on his cheeks.
"I'm fine," Edward said. This was partly true. He wasn't that cold anymore. It felt like it had warmed up since a half hour ago, before the sun was even up over the watery horizon.
They stood their in silence for several minutes. In front of them the sun rose timidly into the sky, bringing with it bright colours of yellow, pink, and orange. The water began to look more like a deep, cool blue than menacing black. The higher the sun got, the stronger it became, and it began to unthaw their bodies with its wonderful heat.
"I miss her too, Ed," Alphonse said carefully, once again watching Ed to see his reaction.
Edward balled his fists up against the rail, his teeth clenching automatically at the mention of her. "It's…different for me, Al," as proof, he raised his right arm, "I'm constantly reminded of her whenever I even so much as move this arm or my left leg. Constantly reminded of what I should have…what I could have..." His voice broke off at the end as tears dribbled down his cheeks from his eyes. He slammed his right arm down against the railing with so much force that it bent the bar, nearly snapping it in half. "Fuck, I'm such a bastard!"
Al continued to watch his sibling for a few seconds before averting his own watery eyes. He couldn't help but think of his childhood friend now, the one he had lost forever. His lower lip began to tremble as he tried to remember her face and found that it was almost too hard to do.
The tears finally spilled when he realized how hard this must have been for his brother who had probably loved her for longer than he himself can remember, more than Al could even imagine.
The fact was that Edward was going through the worst kind of heartbreak. He had lost the most precious thing he ever had before he even had a chance to have it. It was the chance to be with Winry Rockbell, and he finally realized it too late.