DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN XCOM: ENEMY UNKNOWN
The Commander was working late in his office studying intelligence and mission reports. The campaign against the alien invasion was coming to a critical point. The next decision the Commander made could be crucial to the survival of humanity.
The intercom on the Commander's desk buzzed. The Commander sighed and pressed the button to communicate with his secretary.
"Yes?" He asked irritably.
"Commander. Dr Vahlen is here to see you." The secretary's voice was articulate and professional over the intercom. "She has new information for you."
"OK. Send her in." The Commander knew it must be important. Dr Vahlen would never bother him otherwise.
A few seconds later, Dr Vahlen entered the office.
"Good evening, Dr Vahlen." Said the Commander getting straight to the point. "What do you have for me?"
"We just interrogated the aliens." Dr Vahlen got right down to business. "They apparently come from three main planets. The dominant races come from the planet Zod."
The Commander looked up at her. He blinked a couple of times as he pondered what she had just said. Then he burst out laughing and slapped the desk several times with his hand.
"Hahahaha. You can't be serious. The aliens actually come from a planet called Zod." Sniggered the Commander. "That's hilarious.
Dr Vahlen watched her Commander with bemusement as he leaned back slapping the desk and roaring with laughter. Eventually, he managed to control himself and turned to Dr Vahlen Again.
I tell you what, Dr Valhen." Said the Commander barely able to contain his giggles of amusement. "I want you to send them a message."
"Er yes, Commander." Said Dr Valhen, a bit taken aback by the hilarity of her commanding officer. "What would you like to say?"
"I tell you what. " Laughed the Commander. "You can tell them to Zod off. Get it? Sod off. Hahahaha."
"Er... right Commander." Said Dr Vahlen trying to remain professional. "And shall I also send a message send to the other planets?"
"Yeah, why not." Responded the Commander, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. "By the way, what are the other planets called?"
"They are named 'Fuck' and 'Bugger'." Responded Dr Vahlen flatly.
The Commander stared at her blankly.