Disclaimer: I don't own LOST.
A/N: So I've been working on this for a couple of weeks. I would write a couple paragraphs and then leave it and then come back to it and then change the whole thing, but I finally got to a place where I am okay with it, so I'm posting it. Reviews would be appreciated!
When Kate had first heard Jack speak, he had instantly comforted her with the way he instructed her to clean her hands with the alcohol and how he told her the story as she stitched him up. Amidst all the chaos, he had made her feel like everything was going to be okay.
When Jack had calmed everyone down and told them that if they couldn't live together, they were going to die alone, Kate had felt strengthened, and she had never forgotten that. Live together, die alone. She had repeated it many times. She'd also counted many times.
When Kate had lost all hope, when she had finally crumbled, he was there to catch her by telling her that it was going to be okay. Looking into those hazel eyes made everything feel better, if only for a few seconds.
When he had told her to leave him with the Others and to go with Sawyer, asking her to tell him the story, she had felt scared, not only because she was leaving Jack with the enemy, but also because she was leaving without him, and she couldn't stand not having him around.
When he had whispered in her ear, telling her that he was going to come back for her, she'd felt abandoned, but she hadn't lost all hope, because Jack never went back on his word.
When he told her he loved her, Kate hadn't been able to speak, not until now, but now all she wanted to do was talk, and that was the last thing that he wanted to do.
He had a glassy gaze in his eyes. Kate felt that if she looked through them, that she could see the window into his soul, but she was afraid to do that.
"Jack?" Kate said softly, ignoring the wind that blew around them. It had been a few weeks since he had contacted Naomi's boat. They were finally going home, he and her. No one else had been allowed. The boat that had been sent hadn't been big enough to carry everyone. Jack had told her that they were going to come back for the others, but they both knew that there was a chance that they could never come back. Kate didn't know why her friends had chosen her to go. It was partially because Jack had insisted on her coming.
"What's wrong, Jack?" Kate asked. She sat beside him on the deck of the boat, holding a cup of hot chocolate in her hand. Jack hadn't drunk out of his, he'd only set it down beside him.
"Locke was right. We shouldn't have left." Jack said hoarsely.
"What are you talking about?" Kate asked sharply, tugging the blanket that she had been given tightly around her.
"We shouldn't have left, Kate." Jack finally met her eyes.
"You say that now?"
"I don't know what I was thinking. There's nothing at home for me, for any of us. It's no use."
"How do you know that? I could have a mom to go back for, or a husband." Kate added, watching his reaction.
His eyes widened.
"Some of our friends have husbands or wives, or mothers and fathers at home. It's not fair to say that there isn't anything at home."
"Do you have anyone at home Kate?"
"I could, but I don't think anyone cares about me." Kate looked away from Jack, thinking of Kevin.
"Hey." Jack gently touched her chin with his hand, making her look at him again. "I care about you."
Kate licked her lips and looked away from Jack. "I know."
"You already know how I feel about you Kate." Jack finally drank some of the hot chocolate.
"Do I really know? You've been ignoring me.."
"I had a lot of stuff to think about. I wanted to make sure that we all stayed safe. You and Sun were in danger."
"I like to think that I can still trust you."
"You can."
"How can you just say that? You knew what was going on with Juliet, and you didn't tell any of us."
"A woman parachuted onto the island, and no one told me that."
"I told you that." Kate said quietly.
Jack sighed. "Why is this so difficult?"
"You're making it difficult. You don't even act the same anymore." Kate stood up and the blanket fell to the floor of the deck.
Jack just looked up at her as she moved to the side of the boat and leaned her arms on the railing and looked out, wondering what their friends were doing. Her thoughts quickly turned back to the man that was leaning his back against the side of the boat. She didn't understand why he could just change his mind. Why wouldn't Jack want to go home? Kate couldn't imagine Jack not having anyone that cared about him.
Jack stood up and picked up Kate's blanket and brought it to her, putting it around her shoulders, his hands lingering there for only a second before he stood next to her.
Kate sighed. He was still the same Jack. He still cared, and he still wanted everyone to be safe. She supposed some things weren't meant to be understood.
Love was a strong word, it wasn't something to be thrown around, although it had been. It was a casual saying nowadays. Kate remembered walking through malls and watching girlfriends hug each other goodbye and say a casual 'I love you'. Kate knew that it wasn't possible for the girls to really love each other. One day they would get into a fight, and then it was very likely they wouldn't be friends anymore. They would forget ever caring for each other.
But Kate valued love, and she knew Jack did too. Kate was certain that Jack hadn't ever uttered those three words to Juliet. No, he loved her. Did she love Jack? She believed that she did, after all they had been through, it seemed like nothing would ever really separate them. Kate hadn't ever really thought about what would happen after they got off the island. Jack would probably go back to being a doctor, and Kate, well, she was a fugitive. Tears welled up in her eyes at the thought of not having Jack around everyday, and she quickly turned to him.
"Jack?"
Jack turned towards her, his eyes also slightly red.. He had been thinking the same thing.
"What?" He asked softly, his voice more hoarse than ever.
Kate stared at the handsome man in front of her. Did he know how she felt? "I love you."
Jack's lips parted in shock. He hadn't expected that. When he had told Kate he loved her, he hadn't expected it to be repeated back to him. He had given into the fact that she really loved Sawyer, but he had just had to tell her. He was sick of trying to hide from the truth.
Jack closed his mouth and squinted slightly. "Do you really?"
Jack's doubt made Kate burst into tears. "Of course I do." Kate said with a shaky smile.
Jack immediately pulled her into a hug.
"I'm so sorry Jack, I'm so sorry for everything." Kate tearfully mumbled into Jack's shirt. All the stress from everything that had happened to them had finally caught up to her. Jack's warm embrace felt better than she had ever imagined.
"I know, it's okay. I'm sorry too." Jack rubbed her back, the blanket once again falling from her shoulders. Kate shivered slightly from the cold December breeze, and Jack held her tighter, for he too was shivering.
"Is everything going to be okay?" Kate pulled away and looked up into Jack's eyes, seeing the man that she had first met, the man that had given her so much faith, the man that she had come to know and love.
"Everything is gonna be okay." Jack reassured her, and Kate smiled. Just hearing those words made her feel better. Amidst all the chaos surrounding them, they were going to be okay.