A Gintama Fanfiction - I do not own any of the characters in Gintama or the show.
All credit of the characters and show goes to the amazing Hideaki Sorachi who did this fucking awesome series.
This is merely a fanfiction based on Gintama.
This is my first Fanfiction so please go easy on me ^^.
Hope you enjoy it at least.
A vermillion haired girl named Kagura walked through the long streets of edo with her partner and pet Sadaharu towards the park while munching on her beloved Sukonbu. When suddenly she heard a familiar voice.
"Oi, China girl, Got a minute?" said a voice from behind.
Kagura looked around her shoulder when she saw a black haired man with a cigarette in his mouth and a black shinsengumi uniform behind her calling at her, she pretended not to hear and or see him and kept on walking. She was not gonna let those tax robbers destroy her day today or help them with their tax robbing and absolutely not when he kept calling her "china" like that goddamn sadist.
"OI, CHINA GIRL. YOU LISTENING? YOU. GOT. A. MINUTE?" The black haired police officer shouted at her with a vein mark on his face. The vermillion haired girl just kept on walking away with her dog still ignoring the mayonnaise loving guy.
"OI TEME (bastard) LISTEN TO ME YOU LITTLE PUNK! I NEED TO TALK TO YOU SO GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!" The girl took up her purple umbrella while running towards the police officer trying to punch him with it while screaming "I AM NOT A PUNK YOU PUNK!" The cop dodged her furious attacks and unsheathed his sword to dodge her attacks while cursing his job, "why do i always need to ask these stupid yorozuya people for help. All they're good at are causing damage that i need to clean up" he thought to himself.
STOP SWINGING THAT GODDAMN UMBRELLA TOWARDS ME AND LISTEN TO ME. PEOPLE IS BEGINNING TO STARE! DON'T YOU GET THAT I AM TRYING TO TALK TO YOU?" he screamed with vein marks all over his head at the little azure eyed girl with over human strength who furiously tried to kill him with her unique deadly purple umbrella.
She stopped attacking him and said in an annoyed tone "What the hell do you want Mayora? Can't you see that a fine lady and her dog is taking a walk to the park, huh? The black haired man got another vein on his face but ignored the nickname and the comment "we need your help China girl, however i don't think you will like the job at all.." he said trying to sound as calm as possible .
The girl just stared at the police officer who now litted another cigarette and then sayed annoyed no more angrily "Then why the hell do you ask me to do it in the first place if you think i won't like the job, trying to take a lady's precious time eh?" May-Hijikata just sighed and answered with a bored and exhausted expression as if he just took down a whole army by himself "Because you and the other two yorozuya idiots are the only ones that can help us with this and it's not the work itself you'll get angry with. It's more the person you're gonna work with i'd say."
"Huh? who?" the girl asked in confusion and curiosity. "you're gonna work with Sougo on a mission. Four eyes and the perm head have already agreed with the mission after some payment talk (muting the two yorozuya idiots with money and sweets) so you better follow me there this instant" he said while smoking his cigarette.
*WHAT. THE SADIST. NO. I AM NOT JOINING THAT FILTHY AND DISHUSTING SADIST ON A MISSION. NO WAY IN HELL. NO WAY IN HELL I SAY!" she screamed with fury against the cop who fast took a grip on the back of her collar on her beautiful red and yellow detailed cheongsam after realizing that she would run away at any moment and dragged her all the way to shinsengumi headquarters with a furious and dangerous little China in his grip.
The girl just screamed in fury and tried to get of his grasp as he slowly dragged her towards Shinsengumi HQ against her will.
"I DEMAND A LAWYER YOU FILTHY TAX ROBBER. HOW DARE YOU DRAG A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG MAIDEN AGAINST HER WILL TOWARDS A PLACE THAT REEKS OF SWEATY TAX ROBBERS AND SADISM ALL OVER THE PLACE YOU BASTARD! I DEMAND A LAWYER I SAY! ALAWYEEER!" the girl screamed all the way towards the HQ.
-Shinsengumi Headquarters-
At the Shinsengumi HQ sat 5 men. Gor- Kondo Isao, Anpan man, Megane, Sakata Gintoki, and sa- Okita Sougo around a table in a meeting room.
"OI WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING MEGANE AND ANPAN MAN. AT LEAST PRESENT US WITH OUR REAL NAMES YOU IDIOT!" screamed the megane towards author
"oi oi, are you sure that that mayora is coming back here with our Kagura soon?" the white permed samurai said while picking his nose with his little finger. "i am getting bored to wait and what if he's doing something awful towards our cute Kagura chan?" he said with a slightly worried voice but with an expressionless face.
"Cute? danna, Sometimes i wonder if you've ever seen that gluttonous monster!?" answered the 1st division captain Sa- Okita Sougo.
*OOOOIIIII DON'T IGNORE ME. OIII. YOU HEAR MEE?!" the megane screamed once again
What did you say teme?! (bastard) i'll kill you for saying that my beautiful daughter is a gluttonous monster even though she is!" the permy said with an annoyed face as he unsheathed his wooden sword that can drag down a fucking helicopter and swung it towards okita sougo across the table. The 1st division captain unsheathed his steel sword and blocked.
"ma, ma! Let's not get worked up here Sakata san. Sou kun, Touchi would never hurt such a young girl and sou kun was only joking. Right, sou kun?" the gorilla faced man said with a worried tone in his voice trying to calm the yorozuya boss down.
"i give up" the megane sighed.
"i wasn't joking though Kondo san. That china girl really is a gluttonous monster!" the sadist said deadpan faced once again.
"TEME (bastard) I'LL KILL YOU" the yorozuya boss screamed again while jumping up on the table swinging his wooden sword again in the not so big but still not little meeting room destroying a cabinet just behind okita as he dodged the attack and a part of the wall and floor.
"OOOOOII! IDIOT YOU'RE DESTROYING THE CABINET, WALL AND THE FLOOR. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING. WE DON'T HAVE THE MONEY TO REPAIR THIS! a straight man four eyed guy shouted in panic.
"SHUT UP MEGANE. CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I AM PROTECTING OUR LITTLE MON- KAGURA'S PRIDE HERE!?" The permy screamed back at the four eyes.
"IT'S NOT MEGANE IT'S SHINPACHI I'VE TOLD YOU TO STOP WITH THAT NAME ALREADY AND YOU WERE JUST GONNA SAY MONSTER JUST THERE. RIGHT, YOU WERE GONNA CALL KAGURA CHAN A MONTER JUST NOW WASN'T YOU?! the now angry megane screamed at the permy.
before the megane and perm head and the now left out sadist could continue the quarrel they heard a certain chinese girls voice screaming in fury "LET GO OF ME YOU DISGUSTING MAYONNAISE OBSESSED TAX ROBBER. I DEMAND A LAWYER ALSO I'LL GET YOU ARRESTED. TEME! (Bastard)"
The anpan man who haven't even been able to get presented in the chapter until now stood up and opened the door leading out towards the front yard of the shinsengumi to look what the hell was going on and saw a china girl being dragged by the collar of her cheongsam towards the meeting room with an angry Hijikata who did everything in his power not to scream back at the little girl with vein marks all over his face and a white large dog who tried to save his master from the grip of this (from sadaharus view) smoking and perverted old man who tries to take his master away from him for his own desires.
Gintoki jumped down from the table, out from the meeting room and walked towards Hijikata and Kagura with his sword in his hand out in the front yard.
"Oi, pervert. Let go of my daughter." The former White Yaksha said with his dead fish eyes and with his left little finger in his nose and the right on his wooden sword.
"WHOS A PERVERT YOU SWEET OBSESSED MANIAC! I SIMPLY BROUGHT THE THIRD IDIOT MEMBER OF THE YOROZUYA AS YOU AND KONDO COMMANDED IDIOT!" he screamed back not being able to hold in the rage anymore with a now silent Kagura in his hand as she saw her surrogate father.
He let go of her collar and let her go. She fast walked to Gintoki's side and said "Gin chan, this pervert dragged me all the way here and touched me in all kind of lewd places. My womanly pride is hurt!" she sobbed.
"*I DID WHAT? I SIMPLY JUST DRA-" before he could end the sentence came a bazooka missile towards him and just as the missile was about to touch him he heard a voice "Die, Hijibaka!" the sadist said with his most expressionless deadpan voice.
After all the dust was gone they all saw a furious Hijikata who fast ran towards the 1st division captain "I'LL KILL YOU TEMEEE! (BASTARD) Anpanman fastly took a hold of Hijikata and tried to stop him from hurtingokita who just sat there at the table eating some food he got a hold on fromnow here because I could swear it wasn't food there some seconds ago deadpanned.
END OF CHAPTER 1
-Authors Note -
What did you think about my first story and chapter. I don't know where i am trying to go with this and i would be happy if i got any reviews on what i can do better. All kind of criticism is welcomed :) I already know that i stay at one scene too long but i always end up getting stuck somewhere and don't know how to end it. Also i tried to make the humor as much as Gintama style as possible however in the end i just can't copy sorachi senseis amazing sense of humor.