Standard disclaimers apply here
Misconstrued
Three AM
I'm silent and alone tonight as I drown in my drink. No one notices as everybody is busy with their own businesses. I'm not complaining though. I prefer it better that way.
My mind is, as always, on a whirl. Mixed thoughts contrast each other and it damn hurts my head. I'm angry. I'm brooding. I'm calm. I'm blissful. I'm so screwed up. Hell, who am I kidding anyway? Since when did I ever felt completely contented and idyllic? In my dreams.
Speaking of which, I want to sleep. I crave for sleep. No one will notice me sleeping. It will just be normal, as what they would have thought. But these confusing ideas in my head don't help a bit for my headache. Vodka doesn't help either. How about coffee? Now there's a thought. But then again if I'll have some I won't get some rest too as I'm bound to be awake all night long. And that won't be good. No, not good at all. I just might end up killing myself by then.
If I do just that, would anyone be pleased? Father would be.
Well fuck him to hell. I, Nishikado Soujirou, don't have to prove to anyone.
As dawn came, I lay in my bed all wide awake, headache gone worse, chanting that same statement in my head like a mantra, knowing it's one full blooded lie.