Hope all my US readers enjoyed the 4th and everyone read the latest chapter of "What Happens Next" which Christlove88 posted earlier tonight.

Legal ~ I Do Not Own DeGrassi

This story is dedicated to RED who requested it!

Important things to know:

This story is A/U and a future fic and will be a two shot, that means you get one more chapter, one!

No one attended DeGrassi and everyone grew up in different parts of Toronto or only came to Toronto to go to school

Darcy does not exist in this story, Clare's birth father is Glen and her brother by blood is Jake

The rest of the backstory and things you need to know will be explained in the this chapter

Now please enjoy chapter one!

It's Like We Stop Time

(DREW)

I couldn't believe I was sitting in a psychiatrist's office, I never thought I'd end up here again. Ok so this office was a lot different than the psychologist's office I was made to go to when I was suffering PTSD at 17. I had been beaten by a gang and they had threatened to kill me, after that I thought I saw them everywhere and did some stupid things to feel powerful and strong again. After almost killing myself in an amateur MMA fight my parents took me to a doctor and I started seeing a psychologist at the local hospital. He was old, like 60 with white hair and glasses, he looked like psychologist but he was nice, he just wasn't effective and I never felt like he was really listening. His office was all white and sterile, very hospital like. The office I sit in now is very homey, the carpet is a deep blue like the ocean and the walls a very light blue like the early morning sky, soft background music and ocean sounds are playing and there is a little fountain in the waiting room so you sort of felt like you are at a lake or river and not a psychiatrist's office. My psychiatrist this time is a woman, she's young and had only a few months ago finished her residency and internship with one of the best psychologists in the country which made her prices decent. Not that I couldn't have afforded a more expensive one, as a marketing agent for the Toronto Raptors I made a good living but I was in the middle of a nasty divorce, one of the reasons I was here, and it was costing me a small fortune.

The door to the psychiatrist's office opens and an older woman in her late 40's steps out, she must be the patient though. Then I see my new therapist and she's beautiful, like stunningly beautiful! She's smartly dressed in a black pinstripe skirt that stops at her knees, black heels, a white blouse and a black blazer. She looks very sexy and she has these dazzling blue eyes, they're clear and almost crystalline. I'm completely struck by her, I knew she was young and I don't know quite what I was expecting but this was not it. I expected more of a geek, thin and frumpy with glasses and long hair really. Not this vision before me with auburn hair that is cut short with a long side bang that frames her face so beautifully. I'm just staring at her speechless while she tells her client that she'll see her next week and after seeing her to the main door she turns to me.

"You must be Drew Torres, I'm Clare Edwards it's nice to meet you. Why don't you come into my office," she says shaking my hand and I can barely make myself stand.

"Yeah it's nice to meet you I'm Drew," I fumble over my words.

"Yes," she giggles softly and I love her giggle, it's soft and adorable yet sexy. It almost seems like she's flirting with me, I could be crazy though I mean I am at a psychiatrist's office. "I know it says in your file and my appointment book come on into my office."

I follow her into the office, the color scheme continues in here but it's much quitter in here, no fountain or background music. She sits in a cream colored arm chair and I sit on a love seat of the same color.

"I know we discussed a little on the phone but why don't you tell me a little about why you're here," she says.

"Well I went to a psychologist in high school for a bit, it didn't go so well I mean it didn't really seem to help. I don't think I really learned to deal with what happened until I started amateur MMA fighting and then karate. I still don't know that I really dealt with it all but that's not why I'm here today. My brother Adam convinced me to try therapy again, he thought it would help. I'm going through a divorce, we've only been married a couple of years, I don't even remember why I fell in love with her, maybe I was never in love with her. Alli, that's my soon to be ex-wife, she's very selfish and self-centered. Everything had to be about her and when it wasn't she would throw fits or do stupid things to get attention. My brother Adam is an FTM transgender and in the last few months been undergoing surgeries and hormone treatments to complete the transformation. I mean you'd never know it to look at him now but he started his life as Gracie. Anyway our whole family has been supporting him through it, he's a great guy and most people are really understanding about it but he's lost more than one relationship, friend and even job over it. Everyone's attention has been on him so Alli told us all she was pregnant and then a couple months later she told us she miscarried. Only she was never pregnant and of course never miscarried, I actually cried with her over the loss of our child and she had lied about the whole thing! Then last month I found out she was having an affair with her co-worker and I went to a divorce lawyer that day," I tell Clare clenching my fists while talking about Alli.

"Sounds like she's emotionally manipulative and abusive," Clare says scribbling a note in her notebook.

"Yes, she is very. She's trying to take everything from me and she's telling all kinds of lies to her lawyer. She even tried to have me fired from my job, the whole thing is exhausting," I tell her.

"Yes and emotionally draining. How about the other relationships in your life it sounds like you have a good one with your brother," Clare comments.

"Oh yeah Adam's great," I nod smiling when I think of my younger brother.

I spend the next 45 minutes talking a little about my family and my best friend Owen, and a lot about Alli and how terrible she is. Clare doesn't say much but it does feel good to get a lot of this off my chest.

"Okay that's all the time we have for today, shall we make an appointment for next week?" She questions.

Going a whole week without seeing her sounds awful to me, I feel better just talking to her and watching her bright blue eyes when I talk.

"You know I think I need to come in twice a week," I reply.

"I rarely get clients that want to come in more usually they want to come in less. Let me see what's available, are the evening appointments good for you?" She asks getting up and going to her desk, she opens a laptop and I'm assuming looks at her calendar.

"Yeah this time is good, is this your last spot for the day?" I ask since my appointment was at six.

"Yes and I have a six o'clock availability on Friday if that suits you?"

"That would be great," I reply and she stands up filling out an appointment card. I stand up and go over to her standing just behind her but I guess she doesn't notice because she kind of gasps when she turns around. We're standing just inches apart, I can smell her shampoo and she quickly rolls her lower lip between her teeth.

"I'll see you Friday then," she says in a soft voice but I hear a breath hitching in her throat when I take the card from her and our fingers brush together.

"Until Friday," I grin. I want to kiss her, in my head I see myself leaning her against her desk and overtaking her lips. I bet her lips are soft and sweet, they look soft and sweet. I don't kiss her but I feel myself getting hard so I turn and leave quickly.

I get in my car and drive to Downtown Sasquatch, it's a little sports bar down the street from my house. It's also down the street from where Owen and Adam live so we meet there most every night for a beer, to hang out and talk, basically unwind from the day. They're already here in a booth watching the game when I go in, I order a beer and some food at the bar before joining them. Owen and I have been best friends since high school when we were on the football team together. He was one of the few people not to give Adam a hard time and actually helped me defend Adam, that's also when Adam and Owen became friends and we've all been close ever since. Owen is a paramedic now, he dates a lot but doesn't really do steady relationships, not that he ever did. I think my relationship with Alli might have scared him away from steady relationships though. Adam has been dating Becky Baker since high school, her brother Luke was on the hockey team with Owen and we're friends with him too but he lives in Florida now, he turned pro in college. Adam is a freelance photographer but he's really good and he always has work, sometimes it requires travel but he usually stays local.

"So how'd it go?" Adam questions.

"Great Clare is incredible, she's beautiful and sexy, she has these amazing blue eyes and short auburn hair. And you should hear her laugh it's soft a…"

"Did you go to a therapy session or a date?" Owen inquires cutting me off.

I had been sort of dreamily gazing into space while thinking about Clare but now I look back at my brother and best friend. "I had a therapy session, she's good, she didn't say that much but what she did say was very insightful, mostly I just talked, it felt good to talk though. She made several insights into Alli and I didn't feel like she was judging me at all the way I did with the psychologist in high school. I have another appointment on Friday," I tell them.

"Dude don't fall in love with your psychiatrist it will just lead to heart break," Adam advises.

"I'm not in love with my psychiatrist little bro," I shoot back in a snarky tone as the waitress brings my beer and food. "I just have a major crush and deep sexual attraction to her."

(CLARE)

I turn around to give Drew his appointment card and he's standing right behind me, I gasp slightly and sort of freeze. It's not that I'm scared because he's so close it's because I was instantly attracted to him but he's a patient and I can't get involved. I'm supposed have a clinical detachment, to be supportive and helpful but maintain a professional relationship and distance. I've had my own practice for about three months now and I'm building up a steady client base, I've never had this problem ever before, even in my internship. I mean I thought a few male clients were attractive but not like this, there was such an instant attraction with Drew I had to hide it. Then when he was talking the attraction just grew, he's sweet, a protective big brother, he really is close with his family and he wanted things to work with Alli but it's obvious they weren't meant for each other.

He's so close now I can smell him, his aftershave is the same one my best friend uses. I can't even look at Drew because I want to kiss him, I roll my lip between my teeth and he takes the appointment card. Our fingers brush together, my body tingling slightly at his touch, this cannot be good. He tells me he'll see me on Friday and quickly leaves, I lean against the side of my desk and release the breath that had hitched in my throat when we touched. After a few minutes I move again, closing up my office for the night and going out to my car. I drive to Lucas' place, it's sort of like the hub for me and my friends, we meet there to play poker or pool or shoot darts, have a couple of drinks and unwind just about every night.

"Hey sis," Jake says kissing me on the cheek when I come in.

Jake is a year older than me, he's tall and lanky with brown hair like our parents, my hair which goes between light brown in the winter to auburn in the summer is something I got from my grandmother. Jake also has bright green eyes like my high school boyfriend Eli, Jake and Eli had been good friends while I was dating Eli but we broke up when he went to college and Jake lost touch with him. Jake met his wife Jenna at college, she was a music major and is currently a music teacher at DeGrassi Community School in Riverdale, or she is during the school year but it's summer right now. Jenna is also about the only girl friend I have, I never got along with girls to well, especially ones my age but I get along with Jenna and it is nice to have a girl to talk to sometimes since all my other friends are guys. Usually Jenna joins us but they had a baby a couple of months ago so now Jenna is with the baby most nights although mine and Jake's parents babysit a few nights a week.

"Hey Clare want to play winner? I already beat the pants off your brother," Spinner grins at me.

Spinner is a 2nd class constable with the Ontario Provincial Police, Jake and I have known him and Lucas since we all attended Unionville high school, they're two years older than Jake. Spinner and Jake became friends and I became friends with Spinner because he was at the house a lot. Spinner has been married to Emma for almost four years now and she is my only other female friend. Emma however is on a two year study of the Brazilian rainforest, she video chats with Spinner as much as she can and he's gone to visit her once but she won't be home for another 15 months.

"You won't beat the pants off of me," Lucas says sinking two balls and I laugh.

Lucas is what you might call a perpetual bachelor, he dates here and there but settling down and getting married are not in the cards for him, not that he wants them to be. He did attend our high school but he was not friends with Jake, Lucas was a bully and a mean one. He was a trouble maker and a drop out, he got to know Spinner a little bit when Spinner was dating Lucas' younger sister Jane. She's now a singer with a rock band and she broke up with Spinner after he graduated. Lucas turned his life around in Jane's senior year after learning their father had sexually molested her. He went from a bad kid to a man with purpose virtually overnight. He got his GED and went to the police academy, now he's a 4th class constable with the OPP and Spinner's partner.

"I'll play winner but I'm going to get a drink first, is there food I'm starving?" I ask.

"We ordered pizza and Fitz made a salad," Lucas says, I smile and go into the kitchen.

"Hey how was work?" Mark, otherwise known as Fitz to everyone else, asks kissing my cheek.

"You got another new client today right?" Peter questions kissing my other cheek.

I met both Mark and Peter while attending U of T, they were in the same dorm as me and we were all perusing psychology degrees so we had a few classes together. Peter is Spinner's age and Mark a year older than me. Peter has light blonde hair and blue eyes, he's got a sweet baby face and looks like the boy next door. He's always been popular with the girls and he's had a few long term relationships but never been married and always finds something wrong in the relationship to break it up. When I first started attending U of T and moved into the dorms Peter took me under his wing and became like a brother to me. Jake liked this as he was in Ottawa and couldn't keep an eye on me. Peter is a music therapist that works with the mentally challenged, mentally ill and people suffering traumatic brain injuries.

Mark has chestnut brown hair, freckles and soft brown eyes. He attends the same church that Jake, Jenna, me and my parents attend. He lived across the hall from me at U of T, we had a lot of classes together and became fast friends, he's my best friend actually. We dated on and off during college but I think we're better as best friends than lovers. Mark dates occasionally but his job is very hard and keeps him busy, he has very little time for a social life and most of the woman he's dated don't understand this. Mark got a degree in social work and he works with troubled kids, most of whom come from abusive homes or have some horror story from their childhood that lead to them being a troubled teen. Most of the kids he works with are worse than Lucas was in high school. Actually Mark works closely with the police department and often sees Lucas and Spinner while they're working.

"Work was good, and yes I did have a new patient today," I reply taking some pizza, some salad and pouring myself a glass of red wine. I go out to the living room again and they follow me, I sit on the sofa watching Spin and Lucas finish their game and Jake joins us. "He's really nice, been through a lot but so sweet and handsome…sexy," I add the last word under my breath but they hear me.

"Clare you can't date your patients," Peter admonishes.

"I'm not going to date him there's just an attraction, a mutual one I think, but it's fine," I say quickly before taking a bite of pizza.

"Fine?! It's not fine if you have a mutual attraction to your patient. It's unethical, end it or stop being attracted to him," Peter asserts.

"What's up?" Spinner asks as he makes the last shot and wins the game holding his arms up in victory.

"Clare's attracted to one of her patients and he's attracted to her," Jake informs them laughing a little as this seems to all be amusing to him.

"You want us to check him out?" Lucas offers.

"No you guys aren't going to do a background check on him it's a crush I'm sure it will pass," I assert.

I hang out for a couple of hours, I beat everyone at pool since I can easily do the geometry in my head. Lucas beats me at darts though and we all head home a little before ten. I have a modest apartment as it's all I can afford right now. It's in a decent neighborhood though and my neighbors are nice. I keep telling myself it's just a sexual attraction, a crush on a nice guy and it's been a long time since I've dated, I simply need to ignore it and be professional, it doesn't help that I dream about him that night. The next few days are nothing special, I see a few clients, transcribe sessions make further observations and hang out with Jake and the guys at night. Transcribing Drew's session was interesting, I listen to him talk and it sends a tingle through me, I know this is bad but I shake it off and tell myself to be professional. I also don't talk about him to the guys, usually I'm perfectly comfortable talking to them about this kind of thing but this time is different.

Friday morning comes and I choose a plum colored button up dress to wear, I've never worn this dress to work because it's sleeveless. It has thick straps that go over my shoulders and that's it, it buttons down the front with black buttons and has a black belt that goes around my waist. It comes to my mid-thigh and has a deep V-neck. I also pick out 5 inch high heels instead of my usual 2-3 inch low ones, but I do grab a black blazer to cover the top of the dress. I do all of this without thinking about it on a conscious level, if I were to play it back in my mind and analyze it in my mind I would realize that I'm dressing sexier today because I'm going to see Drew, but I bring a blazer to wear for every other clients. Of course I don't play it back and analyze it I simply finish getting ready for work and head to the office.

Today feels like it drags by and I think it's because Drew is my last appointment and I really want to see him again. When Melissa is almost done with her appointment my subconscious is almost screaming at her to be gone because Drew is next.

"You made some good connections between early traumas and your current relationship today Melissa, we'll go into more detail next week and work on some techniques," I tell her walking her to the front door, I show her out and then turn to look at Drew. He's sitting in the chair by the fountain and he grins at me, his deep blue eyes roving over me with approval and I habitually bite my lip. "Hi Drew come on in my office," I tell him and he gets up. I close the door to the waiting room and without thinking about it take off my blazer and set it on my desk chair revealing all of my dress, Drew's smile gets a little bigger and there's a glint in his eye.

"You look very nice today," Drew smiles.

"Thanks," I reply biting my lip again. It's a habit I've had my whole life and up until Drew walked into it a habit I had kept out of my professional life. "So I thought we should start today with Alli, the pain she left runs deep and we're going to have to dig into that if you think you can do that," I tell him.

"I can do anything," he replies and I bite my lip again.

Drew starts talking and I am listening, of course I tape all my sessions too but I am listening and jotting things down in my notebook. Only talking when I need to help him get to a revelation like with all my patients. It would be a perfectly normal session, same as I have with any of my patients, if not for one thing, I start having a sexual fantasy about us in the back of my mind.

In this fantasy I go over and straddle his lap on the loveseat, he starts opening the buttons on my dress and I do the same to his dress shirt. He gets it open and after smirking at my black lace bra I'm wearing he softly cups each of my breasts in his hands, squeezing them gently just as I get his dress shirt open and then I pull off his undershirt revealing his bare chest. Drew slides the straps of my dress down my shoulders and unhooks my bra taking it off and dropping it to the floor. Then holding my right breast he leans down and softly takes my nipple between his lips!

My fantasy is starting to make me wet, I don't realize I'm biting my lip and then I cross my legs without thinking about it, it's an involuntary reflex. Drew stops talking for second when I do this, he just gazes at me exhaling this breath and we're both silent. After a couple of minutes the silence becomes uncomfortable and I prod him to talk again, I manage not to have any more fantasies but I do sit with my legs crossed the whole time. When his time is done I don't want him to leave but I scold myself into being professional.

"So I have this slot open on Tuesday's and Friday's if that works for you, if you still feel like coming twice a week of course," I tell Drew getting up and going to my desk.

"Can I come more?" He asks.

"Uh I think twice a week is enough," I reply laughing nervously. I'd love for him to come more, I want to see him every day but not in a professional setting.

"Tuesday's and Friday's is good then, so I guess I'll see you on Tuesday," Drew says standing but he lingers in the office.

"Yeah Tuesday," I nod and he slowly turns to leave the office. "Wait umm let me give you my business card, it has my cell on it in case you need to get a hold of me after office hours. An emergency situation," I tell him fumbling over my words as I grab my business card. I feel like an idiot, I have a PhD and I sound like a babbling school girl for goodness sakes!

"Thanks," he grins and I just about melt into my 5 inch black heels.

He takes my card, his hand lingering on mine before he takes it, he lingers a second and finally leaves, I collapse against my desk when I'm sure he's gone. Then I grab my cell phone and call Jenna.

"Hey what's up are you headed to meet the guys?" She asks.

"No can you take June to my parents and meet for dinner I need to talk to a girl," I request. June is short for Juniper and she is their 9 week old daughter, yes they all have J names!

"Yeah sure, I'm dying to get out of the house. I'll meet you at Marinella's in an hour," Jenna says and hangs up.

I close up the office and get to the restaurant early so I sit at the bar with a glass of red wine until Jenna gets there. We get seated at a table and order food to share since the portions are huge.

"Okay so what's up? You know your brother is going to ask me for all the juicy details later," Jenna comments.

"Yes well he already knows some of this. I'm attracted to one of my patients," I confess and her mouth falls open in shock. "I know it's awful and totally unprofessional but he's amazing Jenna. I'm attracted to him on every level, he's like no other guy I've dated, he's not like any of the guys either. I actually had a sexual fantasy about him while he was having his session today."

"So go for it," Jenna encourages me as the waitress brings her Italian soda.

"I can't Jenna it's unethical I could lose my license," I retort.

"Clare you light up when you talk about him, your eyes sparkle, I've never seen them do that. You can't just miss this because you're worried about your job. There's a way around everything, tell him you can't be his psychiatrist anymore," Jenna shrugs.

"What am I supposed to tell him Jenna? I'm sorry I'm too attracted to you to be your psychiatrist you'll have to find someone else now how about dinner on Saturday?" I reply sardonically.

"Why not? Does he feel the same about you?" Jenna questions.

"I think so, I mean we haven't ever said anything but there's certain signs. Of course I could be imagining them all," I sigh slumping back into my chair.

"Did you wear that dress for him?" She questions.

"Yes," I admit biting my lip.

"Did he notice?" She inquires.

"He said I looked good," I answer.

"He's into you, dump him as a patient and go for it," Jenna asserts.

I'd like to take her advice, part of me wants to call him right now but part of me worries about what could happen to my career if people found out. Not to mention I'm still not totally sure that Drew feels the same way. I sip at my wine and decide I'm better off just carrying on with my professional life.

(DREW)

"So are these therapy sessions actually working or do you just sit there and fantasize about ripping her clothes off while you're there?" Owen asks me.

It's Monday night and we're at the bar watching a baseball game on the big screen, Adam should be joining us any minute, he just had to finish a shoot and then would be on his way. I've been seeing Clare twice a week for three weeks now, as her patient. I believe she feels for me like I feel for her but it's hard to say, she remains very professional when I'm at the sessions and that's the only time I ever see her. Still she's dressed very sexy on the days when I have appointments, always wearing a dress or shorter skirt with a sexy blouse, she usually wears a blazer of some kind too but takes it off once we're alone in her office. I'm certain that there's a mutual attraction I just don't know what to do about it.

"They are helping, they're helping a lot. Aside from being unbelievably gorgeous, sexy and smart she's also very good at what she does. I see Alli and my relationship with her in a whole new light now. As great as Clare is as a psychiatrist I wish we had met differently I think I'm in love," I tell Owen.

"You can't be in love, what are we talking about?" Adam inquires sitting down with us.

"Drew thinks he's in love with Clare," Owen responds and Adam shakes his head at me as the waitress brings him his beer.

"Drew you can't be in love with her, you've only known her for three weeks. I do think the therapy is working because you are a lot happier," Adam comments.

"He does talk to us about Clare practically every day," Owen remarks.

"True but how much do you really know about her? Besides her name and job?" Adam inquires.

"I know that…" I stop what do I really know about her? "She's a good listener and she's sweet, she's really smart and I know I think about her all the time," I respond.

"I think the boy is actually in love," Adam smirks.

"Boy? I'm older than you!"

"Just be careful Drew, she can't date a patient," Adam advises.

"Yeah I know," I sigh and take another sip of beer.

We stay at the bar a couple of hours and then split up to go home, my appointment is tomorrow and like most nights I have a dream about Clare. They're usually hot dreams and they're always different. I wake up wanting to go to my appointment but I have to get through a day of work first. I do get through work and I'm so busy I don't even think about Clare that much. I leave at five and drive straight to her office even though it only takes me 25 minutes including traffic, I just like being close to her and I consider the waiting room close to her. I wait rather impatiently for her to be finished with the woman that goes before me and when her office door finally opens I smile at her. She says goodbye to the woman and looks at me. She's wearing a cream blazer with navy blue trim and a navy blue dress.

"Hi Drew come in," she smiles. I get up and follow her into her office, she closes the door once we're in. "Shall we pick up from last week?" Clare asks.

"Yeah," I nod sitting down as she takes off her blazer and I marvel at her body in the form fitting navy blue dress. I want to tear out each thread with my teeth and slowly reveal, what must be an incredibly sexy body, underneath.

I start talking and Clare takes her notes, bringing stuff up only when it's relevant. When not taking notes she holds her pen to her lip which is rather sexy in itself but I love it even more when she bites her lip.

"You're making a lot of progress Drew," she smiles when the session is over.

"Thanks and my divorce should be finalized next week which will be a huge weight off my shoulders. I won't have to pay any alimony or anything since she cheated on me and my dad had the foresight to put that in the pre-nup," I tell Clare with a grin.

"Yeah," she laughs softly, "whether we want to admit it or not our parents usually know best. Congratulations on the divorce."

She gets up walking my file to her file cabinet and I follow her, she opens the drawer and sets my file in as she starts to close the door I reach over and place my hand on hers. I get a rush just at the feel of her skin, she jumps slightly and turns around, her body closing the file cabinet door as she leans against it.

"You really look gorgeous today," I tell her almost in a whisper as we're so close together.

"Drew," she exhales.

I think she had more to say but I lean down and ensnare her lips! Just as I thought they are soft and sweet, she starts to kiss me back and I feel like time has stopped.

Part two will be posted on Friday August 15th picking up from here and including some smut!