***Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or the characters. Also, this is my first time ever writing the Ghostfacers and trying to be deliberately funny.
The Ghostfacers Meet The New Neighbors
Harry was completely convinced there was something odd about the people who lived down the block. They kept strange hours, seemed to come and go without ever using a car, and small animals disappeared quite frequently since they moved in. Ed, on the other hand, really didn't want to cause trouble with the neighbors. Again. (The incident with the Marshalls' had resulted in a slightly embarrassing police call and the 'Facers having to take a 200 yard detour on the way to get pizza.) The problem was suburbia wasn't exactly a hot-bed of paranormal activity and the new couple was the only thing strange thing going on.
"Maybe they're vampires," Ed said, downing the rest of his coffee.
"Nah, can't be. I've seen both of them out during the day," said Harry.
"Even the one in the suit?" There was a bit of disappointment in his voice.
"Yeah. Maybe they're shifters. We should at least check it out."
"What about Maggie and Spruce? They're going to be pissed about missing out on a case." Ed shoved his glasses back up his nose. It wasn't that he didn't want to go check this out; he was a Ghostfacer, it's what he did but he really didn't want another family meeting about his 'hobby'.
"We've watched all the Star Trek movies, even Nemesis, TWICE. If we don't do something, we're going to get rusty."
That got Ed's attention. As a Ghostfacer, they needed to stay razor. Harry was right (not that he was going to admit it).
"Alright but I'm in charge of this one!" he said. "And no telling my parents."
"Move over, Harry!"
"You're the one standing on my foot!"
"Yeah, well, I don't know if you noticed but there's a bush here!"
"It was your idea to sneak in the back," Harry hissed, giving Ed a shove who returned it. For about a minute it dissolved into a pushing match until a light in the house flicked on and they froze. A shape moved across the window. Ed mouthed the word 'suit' to Harry and then launched into a complicated set of hand gestures that Harry was an expert at interpreting. (Anyone else might have thought he was telling Harry to do something untoward with the bush.) The two of them snuck over to the back door. It probably should have concerned them that the door was unlocked but they didn't stop to think before pushing it open.
The house was immaculate and some of the decorations seemed slightly out of place such as the Chinese vase that almost looked like it really was from the Ming dynasty. Most of the house was dark except for a light down the hall. Ed and Harry exchanged nods, did the customary Ghostfacers hand gesture, and proceeded down the hall. They got about five feet when they felt a gust of hot breath wash over them and heard a growl from behind. Harry was shaking so much he dropped the flashlight. Slowly, they turned their heads to look behind them.
There was nothing.
"Humans can't see hellhounds," a voice from the direction they had been heading said. "Stay boy!"
Suit was standing there, hands in his pockets, with a hugely satisfied grin on his face.
"H-hellhound?" Ed squeaked, still clinging onto Harry. He had no idea how that had happened.
"Nothing beats a good guard dog," the man in the suit said with a chuckle. His face turned serious. "Why are you in my house? I'll give you ten seconds."
"Uh…"
"Ngh…"
"Five."
"OH GOD PLEASE DON'T HURT US," Harry cried.
"We're sorry, we thought you were a shifter or something. We're so sorry," Ed added. Those Winchester dicks might have thought they were useless but both of them knew a hellhound could only mean one thing: demon. They had faced a lot of things and they knew about demons but had never run across one.
"A shifter? Hardly." the demon said, leaning against the wall. He looked the two of them over. "Are you supposed to be hunters?"
Ed and Harry straightened a little. There was a chance they might make it out of this without becoming dog food.
"We're the Ghostfacers."
"Maybe you've heard of us," Ed added. "We have a website…"
"I don't look at gay porn, sorry."
Anything they were going to say was cut short by a new voice which was probably a good thing since any denial of the 'Facer website not being a gay porn site would've been undermined by the fact they were still gripping each others arms.
"Nah, you just like to make it, buttercup," said the man in the army jacket, appearing behind the demon and nudging him with an elbow. Ed and Harry exchanged glances. This was really out of their league.
"Leave the bedroom talk for later. Can't you see I'm trying to have a nice chat with the neighbors, darling?"
"By nice chat did you mean 'feed them to the hound'?" Army Jacket asked.
"Please don't, I don't like dogs," Ed said.
"We'll just leave. We won't tell anyone, right Ed?" Harry looked at him and Ed nodded enthusiastically.
"Right. Not a word."
"You can count on us."
"Not like those Winchester douchebags…" Ed muttered. Harry noticed that immediately the two perked up at that. Suit narrowed his eyes and Army Jacket's face broke out into a huge grin.
"You know the Winchesters?" The demon's voice made it sound very much like a loaded question.
"Yes."
"No."
"We don't like them," Harry said.
"They're jerks."
The only sound for a moment was the panting of the hellhound from somewhere behind them. They both mentally prepared themselves for what could possibly be the end.
"Ah, come on. They can't be too bad if they don't like the Winchesters," Army Jacket said, cocking an eyebrow.
"And if I sic the hound on them it would ruin the carpet." The Suit almost sounded disappointed.
"Uh, so does that mean we can go?" Ed asked, hopeful.
"I'll give you a head start."
That was all the Ghostfacers (not Demonfacers, after all) needed to hear. They turned and ran, screaming, towards the backdoor the sound of laughter following them.
