Unavoidable Truths

Angel/Faith

Rating: T

A/N: This has been sitting on my computer for God knows how long, just waiting for me to do something with it. So I finally finished it and decided to post.

I own nothing.

It had been a long hard night. One where they both wanted nothing more than to just give up and give in.

He had nearly been killed in a brawl with some ordinary demons, nothing special about them at all, yet they had almost bested him.

She wasn't handling it well at all. Seeing the demon's hand clenched around that shiver of wood, it aimed straight at his heart, had taken its tole on her. The night's excitement had effected her in ways she had never felt before.

She was used to dealing with the hyperness, the high that she got from near death experiences. She would nearly vibrate out of her own skin until she found something to do, to burn off the energy. A faceless stranger she picked up at a club where she had nearly danced herself to death. Or another fight follow by shot after shot of whatever hard liquor she could get her hands on.

But this was something completely different. She was out of her element here, had been since she joined him in L.A. Reveling in her new found straight and narrow path to redemption and the calmness he seemed to inspire in her, she had ignored the fact that she was in uncharted waters. Especially emotionally.

Now it all broke free and rose to the surface. Threatening to drown her in the helplessness she had felt as she watched that stake get closer and closer to his heart. She had fought to get away from it, went half mad trying to get rid of the feelings rushing rapid through her body.

Of course it would have been easier to handle if he hadn't picked up on the drastic shift in her mood. And being Angel, he just had to push her to talk about it. She had fought him tooth and nail, came up with every excuse she could think of to get the hell out of there. But he was having none of it.

So here they were, she was shouting at him, balling her eyes out. Not a pretty picture by any means. And still he stood there with that soul searching look in his eyes. Not letting her break eye contact for even a second to compose herself, he want to see it all.

She could almost hate him for it. It was torture of the worst kind, there was no escape from it...a fact he kept trying to get her to face. So like she always seemed to do when faced with the unavoidable truths that he forced upon her. She broke; into a million shivering, weeping, pieces. Having faith that he would put her back together again, as he always did.

"You know what its like, the darkness and pain getting bigger and bigger inside you. Until there's so much of it that your drowning, and you have to do something, anything to let it out. You have to make something hurt, something burn, to keep it from swallowing you alive."

The words were tumbling from her lips, they were a fountain of truth and misery. Nothing could stop them, they could never be recalled. They burst forth with a vengeance and left her weak and trembling.

"You look at me and - and you see too much! You make me feel too much! Want things that I know I don't deserve to even wish for."

"And no matter how hard I try, I can't hide, I can't keep you out. Until I just don't want to anymore! And its just -"She was practically screaming the words at him, tears flowing down her bruised face, sobs tearing their way out after being held inside for so long. So many years of pain she had held inside, so many scars she hid from everyone except him.

And damn he wanted to comfort her. But he was tired of battling his feelings inside, fighting the exact same thing she was, trying to keep her from seeing what he felt. And now suddenly she wasn't the only one out of control.

"You think I don't know."

"What it feels like to fight tooth and nail to keep someone out, knowing all along that fighting it was completely pointless. I'm feeling the same thing that you are Faith." His voice was low, his manner clam, but there was something in his eyes that was screaming at her heart.

She looked at him, heard his words. But he was at a loss as to how to make her believe them.

"I kept Cordelia and Wesley and Buffy and everyone else out, no problem. They'd keep at me until I gave them something, so I'd give them a tiny sliver of what I was feeling and they would go off thinking they had fixed me."

"But then you came along, you came with your big brown eyes and that smile of yours that you never let anyone see but me." He cupped her face in his hands and brushed the tears away with his thumbs.

He looked her straight in the eyes,"And you know your the only one who can really understand the things that I've done, and what its like to live with them everyday and every night."

"Its scary as hell to have someone look at you, know the horrible things you've done, know the pain you feel, and still think you're worth it. But you do Faith, and so do I."

"We are what's real Faith. WE don't have to hide from each other. That's why we fit together so easily."

"Because its right were we're both supposed to be."

He tugged her body until it was fitted against his. Leaning his forehead against hers, they touched from head to toe. Inside and out.

Before she knew what was happening his lips were on hers, his tongue slipping seamlessly into her mouth. And God did they ever fit.

It was slow and passionate and real. And completely unlike any kiss she had ever felt before. Acceptance.

She kissed him back with everything she had, sliding against him. Both of them lost in the feeling of each other. They had both been, and seen, and fought so much. But in that moment they both knew this was what they had been searching for.

They'd fight the good fight until the very end. Because they were both warriors right down to the core. They would keep seeking atonement for their sins.

Only now they would both had the happiness that they had search for, yet feared for so long.

THIS, this was home. This was peace, this was forever.

They had found their redemption. It had been there the whole time. In each other.

Buffy leaned against the stairs. Unnoticed by the two soon to be lovers below. She had come as soon as she found out that Faith was out of a coma.

Had been for months now. Somehow she had known that Faith would come here, to L.A., to Angel. Where else did she have to go?

Little did she know what she would find. Never could she have imagined this.

Kinda emotional and messy. But it was there from some late night free-writing and it was doing no good sitting in a file, so here she is.