Author's Note: This is a story I wrote in December 2013 for the CommentFic community on LiveJournal. I'm not sure why I haven't posted until now. Fair warning, this is one of the darkest stories I've written. The prompt was: Ed lost the fight with Father.

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Riza knew it was only a matter of time before he snapped. She just hadn't thought he would shatter so spectacularly, and so horribly.

They were eight days out of the capital on their way to Xing and were staying in a farmhouse they had borrowed from its deceased occupants.

Perhaps the setting reminded him too much of home. She knew in the days following Maes' death the simplest reminders would set Roy off into an emotional bender. But she had been there for him then.

Perhaps the Rockbell girl could saved Edward from himself. But she was gone. All of them were gone. Of course, they had all lost people during the final battle and the resulting destruction of Amestris. But Edward had seen it up close. And he had the added weight of the guilt he felt over the end. They didn't blame him of course, but he did.

In the heat of the battle, Al sacrificed himself to give Edward back his right arm at the perfect moment to strike the killing blow against Father. In her mind, she could still see it play out that way, victory at last in their grasp. Only in reality, it didn't.

Instead, Father had just enough power remaining to block the blow, and by then Hohenheim was unable to prevent him from consuming the souls of several nearby soldiers to replenish his stores. From there, everything happened so fast. After blocking attacks more powerful that Riza had thought possible, Hohenheim simply couldn't sustain any more, and his death was as quick as it was brutal.

The battle was over within moments. With Hohenheim and Al dead, Edward unconscious and Roy blind, they were helpless before the renewed might of Father. And he knew it.

So he did the cruelest thing he could. He let them live. Despite Scar's efforts, Father was soon able to recast his alchemy, ripping the souls from every man, woman and child in Amestris. Millions dead in seconds.

And they could only stand and watch. Just as before, they were unaffected, but this time they were out in the open, and saw their friends and allies collapse lifelessly to the ground around them, knowing they would not be given the welcome peace of death, but the torment of souls serving as the fuel with which Father would conquer the world.

So they fled. Ling offered they safe haven in Xing, at least what little safety could be found in a world under siege. That gave them a direction. For most of them, it was enough.

But it wasn't enough for Edward. She had ordered the others to keep an eye on the young alchemist, but he escaped their watch sometime in the night.

She noticed his absence as soon as she left the room in which she was tending to Roy. She found him in the barn. She smelled the blood before she actually saw him, his back propped up against a wall, his chin resting on his chest.

Although he must have been delirious with blood loss, his left hand continue to saw the knife blade back and forth, trying even now to cut through the bone. Muscle and tissue hung loose where the knife had long since cut through the skin and meat of his right arm.

His entire side was stained red and and a pool had formed in the dirt floor of the barn. Several flies were lazily settling on him, unperturbed in their drunken euphoria by her approach.

"Edward," she said softly, unable to find the anger necessary to yell at the boy.

There was the slightly hiccup in his sawing, and she saw him attempt to raise his head to look at her. She gently took hold of his left arm, pulling the knife away from the carnage of his right. He didn't have the energy to fight her.

"Edward," she said again.

"Riza?" Edward answered, his voice hoarse and hollow.

"I'm here, Ed."

"Tell Winry," he began, but stopped as his head fell back against his chest. "Tell Winry," he started again, his voice barely above a whisper. "Tell her I'm sorry I broke my automail again. I didn't mean to. I was trying to fix it. Tell her I tried to fix it."

"I will Ed," Riza said, tears flowing freely down her face. "I'll tell her."

"Thank you," Edward said.

He briefly smiled before the tension slackened and she felt his arm go limp. The expression which remained on his face was one which could have been called contentment, and she knew he was gone.

Riza stayed with Edward for sometime, thinking about the young man she had met as a boy and who had grown to become an ally and a friend. The alchemist who almost saved the world.