Fairly Odd Baby Inbetweenqual
Ever wonder what happened to Cosmo when he 'got lost' during Fairly Odd Baby? Here's my version!
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After Cosmo poofed away from his baby shower, he sighed sadly. He had a feeling he'd overreacted to Timmy's outburst. The green-haired fairy figured the 10-year-old just had had enough of being barfed on and ordered around by Cosmo's moodswinging self.
"I know! I'll blame it on the mood swings and hunger cravings and go explore!" He exclaimed, hugging his bulged stomach after realizing his surroundings. He'd popped up in a forest of some sorts. Cosmo happily floated off into the tress. He 'ooo'ed and 'ahh'ed at the wildlife and scenery.
A rabbit jumped out from a bush as Cosmo passed by. The rabbit stopped and sniffed at the fairy curiously. Cosmo waved happily and flew on, not noticing the bunny get snatched by a fox and get carried off, squealing in fright. When he came across a clearing, he stopped. The green-haired fairy saw two figures fighting their way through the bushes and trees, toward where he was floating.
"Edward, do you know where you're going? We've been in this jungle for about three hours!" A high-pitched voice echoed through the trees.
"Al, I've been trying to find the way out! If you think you can do a better job, be my guest!" Two people, one looked like a kid -- a rather small kid -- and the other was a very tall man with spikes on every angle of his body.
Cosmo eyed them curiously, blinking with one hand covering his stomach. When the two figures finally reached the clearing, they stopped abruptly at finding the winged fairy floating not even five feet away from them. There was a definate awkward staredown. The shorter boy, Cosmo noticed, had blond hair and gold eyes to match. He adorned black clothes- pants, tank top and a long sleeved vest. The taller, shiny one held a long red coat draped over his forearm and in his free hand he held a brown suitcase. The blond stared at Cosmo, seemingly slightly wary of his appearance.
"Hi! I'm Cosmo!" The green fairy shouted to them and began waving his arm enthusiastically, grinning when the short one winced and glared at him.
"Brother, do you think he's a chimera?" The armour whispered to the short alchemist. Ed continued to glare, his golden gaze locked with deep green eyes.
"I don't know, Al. Keep your eyes on him." He straightened up, keeping his glare, he began slowly walking forward, the armour tailing behind him muttering something that sounded like "Brother..." Coming face to face with Cosmo's wide grin, the short boy stared him down.
"What's your name?" The green-haired fairy finally asked out of curiosity. Suddenly grabbing the blond's face in his hands, he startled the boy by shouting, "We can be best friends!" Cosmo then proceeded to wrap his arms around the boy's neck and hug him tightly. "I just love making new friends!"
"Okay, my name is Edward! Now get off me!" Ed managed to shout before shoving the creature away. Cosmo didn't mind the seperation at all, he was now smiling down at his pot belly, stroking it fondly. "What.. are you?" The boy finally asked, glaring at the green fairy. Cosmo frowned thoughtfully and turned his green gaze back to Edward. Floating until he reached the blond's nose, Cosmo poked his forehead.
"Haven't you ever seen a fairy before?" Leaning back, not even acknowledging Ed's shocked look, he continued, "Well, I guess you wouldn't sense you have to be miserable to get one. You don't look too miserable. Just angry." The fairy rambled.
"Mr. Cosmo, are you a fairy chimera?" The armour finally asked, startling poor Cosmo out of his witts. He screamed in fright, and darted behind Ed's head, shaking violently.
"AHH! The robot spoke to me! Don't let it hurt my baby!" He wailed, hugging his enlarged tummy. Everything grew quiet after that. Edward glanced at Alphonse, a look of complete aggrivation on his face. He felt a tick form on his face, and he swiftly reached behind his head and snagged the fairy, pulling him in front of his golden gaze, glaring at him.
"Did you just say you have a baby?" It was almost as if the twenty seconds of his terror never happened. Cosmo grinned cheekily and patted his stomach.
"Well, not yet." He told them. Ed's glare loosened slowly while an almost disgusted and unnerved expression took it's place. His grip on the fairy's shirt slackened.
"..What do you mean 'not yet'?" Cosmo laughed and poked Edward in the nose while Alphonse looked on in silence.
"I think it's time someone learned of the birds and the Beejee's!" The fairy recited yet again. The golden eyed alchemist's eyes widened, but he raised an eyebrow.
"What? But... wait.. Beejee's..?" Cosmo put on a thoughful expression and put his finger and thumb to his chin.
"That's right, you non-fairy humans don't know a thing about fairies." He mumbled aloud. "The male fairy always has the baby!" Cosmo exclaimed to Edward's questioning gaze. As soon as those words left the fairy's mouth, the blond's expression took on an almost sickened one.
"So... you fairies are like... seahorses, right?" Alphonse ventured gently, trying hard not to scare the fairy again. Cosmo twisted slightly in Edward's grip to give the armour a grin. Apparently, the green-haired fairy had no such fear of Al anymore.
"Exactamundo!" He shouted happily, patting his stomach.
"Wait a minute. Why are you here, if you are... having a baby?" Edward asked, after a few seconds of regaining his speech. Sorrow once again invaded Cosmo as soon as he remembered what he was doing there to start with. Edward eyed the fairy closely. His mood changed dramatically so quickly.
"Oh... I just had an argument with my godchild and he wished me away." Cosmo paused. "Well, not wished me away, but he said I wish you would get lost!"
"That's terrible, Cosmo! Maybe you should go make up with your... wait, did you say godchild?" Alphonse questioned the green-haired pregnant fairy. The question seemed to make Cosmo freeze up and he became rigid in Edward's grip.
"Ahh.." Twisting around to get free, Cosmo suddenly was wishing to be back at his baby shower with his friends, wife and godchild who he still had to get an apology from. Cosmo tried flying away, but realized too late that Ed still wouldn't let him go. The blond had been busy studying him.
"Wait a minute, you're not going anywhere just yet." Edward told the fairy sternly, making poor Cosmo wince. "What do you mean by godchild? Just what are you fairies anyway? And what do you do?" Ed questioned, very curious about his new discovery. "And who is your godchild? Would it be anyone we know?"
"NO!" Cosmo shouted, making Ed drop him in surprise. Flapping his wings quickly, the fairy hovered and began searching for his wand. "Sorry, it's against Da Rules to tell you! I'm not even supposed to let you guys see me!" Cosmo said frantically, suddenly worried about the situation. Maybe it was his mood swings? Ed wondered. The fairy was pregnant, as much as it disturbed the blond.
"No, Cosmo, calm down! We won't hurt you!" Alphonse tried to settle down the expectant father. Cosmo then turned with absolute fright and anger, despite having been so innocent and nice earlier.
"You don't understand! It's against Da Rule if you guys see me and know about me, and I could get taken away forever from Tim--... my godchild if I get found out! GO AWAY!" He screeched and dove down behind a bush, shivering. Alphonse and Ed stood frozen in shock at what had just occured. They'd just been shouted at by a mythical creature thought only to exist in fairytales. Well, the Philosopher's Stone was said to be a legend, but that didn't stop them from looking for it. Edward sighed and hung his head before kneeling in front of the quivering bush.
"Look..." He trailed off when he didn't remember the fairy's name. Then deciding he didn't care to know it, he continued, "Me and my brother won't do anything to break the rules to take you from your godchild, okay? We just want to be on our way so you can get back to whatever it was you were doing." Leaves parted slowly and revealed a glossy green eye squinting at him.
"You guys won't tell Jorgen on me?" He asked softly, tears welling up in his visible eye. Alphonse shook his head and waved his arms back and forth, even though they had no idea who Jorgen was. In a burst of newly found energy, Cosmo shot out from behind the bush to wrap his tiny arms around Edward's throat again. "Thanks guys, you truly are my best friends!" He exclaimed happily.
"Okay, okay, get off!" Ed shouted and pulled the fairy from his throat, rubbing it with his left hand, glaring at him.
"Can you guys help my find my wand? I think I dropped it somewhere." Edward and Alphonse glanced at each other.
"Wand? You mean you use magic?" Al questioned the fairy. Before Cosmo could answer, Ed spoke up.
"You can't use magic. It doesn't exist." He muttered coldly, glaring at the soft dirt below his boots.
"What are you talking about? Of course it--" Cosmo cut himself off. He might be an idiot at times, but he knew when to keep his mouth shut. "Oh... right. Yeah, of course it doesn't!" He finished, forcing a laugh. Cosmo figured the less they believed in what he was, the more of a chance he could get away with someone finding him.
"Yeah..." Edward drawled out, eyeing him. "We're alchemists. Scientists to be exact." Oh, so these guys thought about things in a logical and down to earth way. Maybe he could get out of this yet. "So who's your wife?" Edward asked suddenly. Cosmo blinked and turned to stare at the blond. Thinking on it, it really shouldn't matter if they knew Wanda's name or not.
"Oh, you wouldn't know her. Her name is Wanda." He ended the sentence with a lovestruck expression and a sigh escaped him. Ed and Al sweatdropped.
"Wow, what a creative name." Ed muttered, rolling his eyes. That's when he noticed the fairy's downcast look at the mention of his wife. "Hey, why don't you go back to her if you miss her so much?"
"Yeah... I guess I could." Cosmo said, thoughtful once again. Alphonse sighed.
"Well, why don't you go back to wherever it was that you came from?" The suit of armour asked.
"Because I need my wand." Cosmo said simply.
"Ah." Edward returned, nodding his head. "And... why do you need it? Why can't you just fly back?"
"Because it'd be easier to just 'Poof' there, silly!" The fairy exclaimed. Edward rolled his eyes and sighed heavily. Now he was starting to regret going through the forest as a shortcut.
"Hey, is this it?" Alphonse asked curiously, lightly picking up a black stick with a gold star adorning the top. Cosmo laughed in joy and flew over to snatch it, rubbing it against his face.
"Thanks you guys! Now I can go back to my baby shower!" Cosmo exclaimed. "But first... to do some more exploring and nature watching!" Edward and Alphonse watched Cosmo as he flew off, dancing and twirling like an insane maniac. The blond turned to Al.
"Wanna just say this never happened?"
"Sounds good to me."
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A/N: I have no idea. Don't question me about it. lol Actually I was just thinking about what Cosmo went through after Timmy wished him 'lost'. Ehh... I probably dragged it on longer than necessary, but hey, I had fun writing it. Kind of.
Disclaimer: Don't own Cosmo, Wanda, Timmy, Ed or Al!