Title: Creature of Habit
Fandom: AtS
Characters/Paring: Doyle (Cordy/Doyle)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Suggestive dialogue.
Summary: Doyle has been caught doing something he should've have at the office.
A/N: Originally written for the "Habits" prompt at the LJ community Jossverse_LAS.
:::Creature of Habit:::
Doyle was more than a little embarrassed, but not as embarrassed as Cordelia. Though in Cordy's case, the embarrassment had quickly given way to a general sense of disgust, accompanied by no shortage of ridicule. He knew he shouldn't have done it at the office. He probably shouldn't have even started in the first place. It had felt so wrong when he had begun, though now it was almost as natural as breathing. He definitely shouldn't have done it at the office.
"I can't believe you!" Cordy was still going. "I really just can't even understand why you would do that."
"Oh, come on now," Doyle protested, "I'm sure there are plenty o' men who do it."
"Maybe some of the major lowlifes who still live in their mothers' basements," Cordy quipped.
"I'm sure they're perfectly well-adjusted gentlemen," Doyle defended.
"And you're using yourself as example of that?" challenged Cordy.
"I knew I shouldn't 'ave done it in the office," Doyle muttered unhappily.
"You think at the office is the issue here?" asked Cordy. "Doyle, it's just plain weird."
"How is it so weird?" Doyle demanded. "It's just something I do."
"Something you do every day, you mean?"
"Well…" Doyle had no reply.
"And why were you in the office?" Cordy inquired.
"Well, my TV set got smashed by that lousy demon the other day," he explained. "And," he muttered at a quieter volume, "the replacement's still on layaway."
"Oh, that is just too sad," observed Cordy. "You couldn't even make yourself stop long enough to buy a new TV? Are you that addicted?"
"I'm not addicted!" said Doyle defensively. "It's just – it's a habit."
"A habit?"
"Yes," he stated decisively. "I could kick it anytime though."
"Oh, really?" The way Cordy's eyes lit up made Doyle suddenly nervous; he knew what was coming. "Then do it now," she insisted predictably.
"There's really no reason to-"
"Just to prove that you can," said Cordy plainly. "Go – two weeks," she decided.
"Two weeks?"
"Two weeks," she repeated.
"Yeah, all right," said Doyle with an attempt at bravado. "Two weeks. I can do that."
:::Two weeks later:::
Doyle sat behind the desk at Angel Investigations, feeling impossibly bored. He drummed his fingers on the polished wooden surface of the desk and his eyes casually glanced at the clock. Almost two weeks exactly, it would be a shame to let himself slip up now. He eyed the small TV in the corner.
"Hey, Doyle," said an overtly cheerful female voice.
"Cordelia!" Doyle jumped out of his chair and turned to face the door.
"So," said Cordy with a smile, clearly enjoying this too much, "how are you doing?"
"Fine as ever, o' course," he assured her, trying to sound nonchalant.
"And what about your – habit?" she asked him.
"Oh that?" Doyle tried to sound surprised. "I've barely even thought about it," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "How long has it been anyway?"
"Two weeks," said Cordy brightly, playing along with his poor ruse.
"Oh, has it been that long already? Gee, I hardly noticed," he replied. "Guess that means I've proven my point, yeah?"
"Only if you've actually managed to stay away from it for the whole two weeks," she qualified. "Have you?"
"Like I said, I could've stopped at any time."
"I guess that means you wouldn't be interested in what I brought?" Cordy prompted as she set her purse on the desk; there was a rolled up magazine sticking out of the top.
This was just too cruel.
"Ha," Doyle dismissed. "Like I need that thing." He tried to keep his eyes from flickering toward it as he swallowed nervously.
"I'm not too sure that you haven't already seen what's inside," said Cordy, walking past him and taking his seat behind the desk.
"It's really not a big deal," Doyle assured her.
"Really?" Cordy pulled out the magazine and scanned the cover. "So, you have no idea about what this pretty blonde girl has been up to this week?"
"It's not really important, yeah."
"Oh, and check out her boy-toy," Cordy enthused. "Hello, salty goodness!"
"Now, that was never what I watched for," said Doyle firmly.
"I'm sure they just hooked you with their amazing plots," said Cordy with a nod as she searched the pages of the magazine.
"They're not that bad," Doyle defended.
"You don't even care if-" she checked the name, "Susan here is having her Elvis tattoo removed?"
"She is?" Doyle gasped genuinely. "Oh, that's trouble, that is."
"You really didn't know that?" Cordy questioned, seeming surprised by this turn of events.
"O' course not," Doyle told her. "I said two weeks an' I meant it. It's not like I'd stand 'ere and lie. If I'd slipped up, I'd 'ave said so."
"Well, color me impressed," said Cordy thoughtfully. "I guess people really can change their habits." She stood up again. "And I mean, really? Who needs this kind of cheesy stuff anyway?"
She set Soap Opera Weekly down on the table.
"It's really great to see that you can change," she told Doyle kindly. "Now if you would just get rid of your porn, I might actually think about letting you treat me to dinner some time."
"Ah, what can I say?" Doyle replied with a shrug. "I'm a creature o' habit."
:::END:::