Pairing: Male!Reader X N. Italy

Warning: Yaoi but more in the category of Shouen ai I guess. = w = Oh and language and fluff.

Alright… I'mma write this in one sitting… *takes big breath*… here goes nothing… :'/

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

IMPORTANT NOTE: _(M/N)_ means 'Male Name'.

With what seemed to be his bed sheet wrapped around his waist, Francis gave me a sheepish smile from around the corner. I was sitting on our couch in an old band shirt and a pair of boxers, halfway through a bowl of cereal. With my cheeks filled with milk and mushy food, I glared at him halfheartedly and ignoring the bits spraying out onto my shirt and the floor I said,

"Hell no."

The blond gave me pathetic, pleading eyes, "Please, _(M/N)_ ," he begged. "Just this once, pick up Antonio from Romano's. S'il vous plaît(Please)? I'm begging you!" And he was, but I really didn't want to go and pick up our Spaniard roommate. It wasn't that I hated Antonio, oh no. He was like a brother to me, all of us actually. 'All of us' being the other inhabitants of the house; Francis, Gilbert and of course, me. Unfortunely for me, Gilbert was out with… someone, I don't know. He's probably crashed out on his younger brother's couch after some all night drink-fest.

I scoffed(which sounded more like a snort), causing more milk to land on me. I swallowed this time before I spoke, "I'm busy eatin'," I pouted, lifting up my bowl for emphasis. "and why should I? Why can't you go and pick up him up from his boyfriend's? You may be naked but you're not busy."

Francis opened his mouth to bitch at me some more but feminine giggle could be heard from upstairs. "Oooh Francis?~" A woman's voice called seductively from upstairs.

Oh. Francis had a girl in his bed. Of course. For some reason this caused him to smirk arrogantly at me before turning towards the voice. "Coming, mon charmant(my lovely)!" I rolled my eyes at him as I viciously shoveled another spoonful of fruity goodness into my mouth. He was seriously ridiculous. Bringing anything with two legs into his room(Well there was that one time when it was just one leg…).

Snapping out of his charming cover-up, he glared back at me. "Will you just go get 'im already?" he whispered harshly at me in his heavy French accent. It was obvious by his tone that there was absolutely no room for argument. But whatever, I was going to keep arguing.

I groaned dramatically. "But them I have to put on pants! And I don't want too!" I slumped deep down into the folds of the couch with my bowl in my lap, the milk swishing around in it. I was pouting pretty hard at the floor right now. I don't care if I was twenty-two years old. I'm an adult! I can pout if I want too, damn it! Hmph.

Francis glared all parent-like at me before pointing a demanding finger at me. "Allez l'obtiennent!(Go get him!)" With that order he retreated around the corner until I could hear his feet making their way up the stairs.

"I don't speak French, jerk…" I mumbled to myself, now alone.

"And it iz noon! You need to put on some pants anyway!"

I threw up my hands in frustration and yelled at the ceiling. "It's my day off! I can go pants-less if I want too!"

Toni better thank me for picking his car-less ass up. I even put on pants for him…

After I took a shower and got dressed in my favorite shirt, pants, and shoes, I drove to Romano's house to pick up my friend. I even added my totally awesome pair of shades to make myself look cooler. Hey, if I was going to be forced to put on pants and leave the house, I was going to look hot while doing it.

Now, I didn't know Romano too well but I did know his name, what he looked like and that he was a big jerk for someone so small. And although I didn't like how he treated my amigo in front of people, But I did hear that he was also embarrassingly sweet to Antonio in private. So I guess that I'll let him slide. For now.

I pulled my car up into the Vargas' driveway once I got there. My car wasn't as big or as flashy I would have liked, but it got from 'Point A' to 'Point B' without any trouble. I also kept the car in super nice shape so that kind of made up for it. I got out and walked up to the door of the nice, one-story household. I knocked a few times and waited until someone answered. When the door did open it revealed a familiar, short, angry looking, Italian with gold eyes.

I held back a grimace and brought out an obviously forced smile. "Hey, Romano," I greeted weakly.

"Ciao, idiota,(Hello, moron.)" Romano huffed snootily as he continued to glare.(Why was everyone glaring at me today?) He rested the hand that wasn't holding open the door on his hip, trying to size me up. I don't know why Romano dislikes me, but he does. It might just be because he's mean like that.

Then a tall man with green eyes and no shirt on popped out from behind the door. Antonio smiled brightly at me. "Hola, _(M/N)_! Are you my ride?"

I laughed at his innocent enthusiasm. I lowered my sunglasses and wiggled my eyebrows at him, giving him a suggestive look. "Damn right I am, sexy," I answered smirking. While Antonio laughed my play-flirting, his boyfriend seemed to bristle at it. Okay, so maybe Romano hated me for pretending to flirt with his lover. That might actually be it.

When his laughter finally died down, Antonio waved me in. "Come on in, amigo. I'll be ready in a minute."

The Italian slapped at the man's chest. "I don't want that cretino(asshole) in my house!"

Rubbing the spot where Romano hit him, Antonio looked with sad disapproval at the other man. "Now Roma, no esté tan tacaño a él(don't be so mean to him). He means no harm."

Crossing his arms and turning on his heel with his nose in the air, Romano stomped away. "Non mi dica quello che anche fa!(Don't tell me what to do!)" I could hear him say as he disappeared.

Sighing sadly Antonio proceeded to wave me in, stepping aside to finally let me in. "Un minuto,_(M/N)_. Let me just calm little Roma down and then we can go."

"And maybe find a shirt too?" I nodded towards his chest as I walked inside.

Antonio looked down in confusion for a second before smiling awkwardly up at me. "Oh yeah, that too."

I laughed and waved him off. "Take your time," I said sounding amused. I stayed there until he walked away and around the corner. The makeup time for Antonio and Romano is unpredictable so I was going to look around the house.

I've actually never been inside before, I've only dropped off and picked up people from here so it was a bit interesting. I glanced around and saw that Antonio's boy-toy had a lot of things that looked straight from Italy. He was sure in touch with his roots. I kept walking through the cozy home and also saw that it was also pretty cluttered. While I was stepping over discarded clothes and knickknacks a sudden aroma surrounded me. I froze in the middle of the room and breathed in deeply to get more of it. It was… delicious. It was warm scent with a tad bit of spicy-sweetness to it. I could feel myself drooling already.

Following the smell, I ended up standing on the edge of the kitchen. In the middle of the kitchen was a small framed man standing in front of the stove with an apron tied around his waist. From the back he looked like Romano but his little curl-thingy was lower on his head… Since when did Romano have a brother?

Curiosity taking the better of me, I walked right up behind the guy and looked over his shoulder. He was stirring sauce in a humongous pot, it was red and spices could clearly be seen in its contents. The smell was also on full blast now. Unable to help myself I loudly inhaled another whiff of the mouthwatering sauce.

"Oh man! Did you seriously make that yourself?" I asked excitedly. Because if he did, I wanted some.

I must have startled the little guy because he shrieked pretty loud. "AHHH!" Then he spun around with his stirring utensil in hand and splattered hot sauce all over my face and sunglasses.

"Ah!" I screamed, stumbling back from the sudden assault. "Oh-my-god that's hot!" I gripped my face, trying to desperately wipe off the burning liquid.

"V-vee? ! W-who are you? !"

I wiped furiously at my face. "I'm Antonio's friend!_(M/N)_! Oh god this buuurrrns…" I whined. I should have stayed home and made Antonio walk home…

This seemed to be enough for the boy because he sounded guilty now. "Oh no! I-I'm so sorry! I-I'll get you a towel! Um…" I heard him shuffle through some drawers but I couldn't see him because of the food on my glasses. The sauce was cooling down now but man, that was not fun…

"L-let me get it," I stuttered quietly as he grabbed my shoulder to pull me down towards him and began to wipe off my face. I held still as he did so, feeling as he gently cleaned my face clean of any food. It should have been weird or awkward or creepy to have someone stranger do this too me, but it wasn't. I felt nice actually. It's embarrassing to explain but it felt very… caring.

He let go of me once he was done. "Um, I-I'm done but there is still some on your glasses…"

I sighed feeling relieved that the pain was over and stood up straight. "Yeah, okay, thanks." I took off my shades to clean them off. Now able to see in front of me, I saw a the guys face…He was cute. He was standing there wringing out his trembling hands and had red-ish brown hair and bright, shiny gold eyes. They looked as though he was about to cry.

I stared at him for a long time unable to think of anything to say. He really looked like Romano but this guy had such a cute, innocent aura to him. He seemed to shake even harder under my gaze because his eyes began to tear up even more.

"Vee~, I'm s-sorry!" He cried out pitifully. It was so unexpected that it made me jump. Why was he apologizing? "I-I didn't see you th-there so I- just- oh please don't hit me!" Hit him? ! What did that monster Romano do to this guy?

I smiled awkwardly at the dude, "H-hey, its okay! I kind of snuck up on you anyway. It was my bad," I said honestly.

He blinked misty golden globes at me, "Y-you're not angry?"

"Nah, it just scared me a bit. Not to much harm was done to this pretty face," I said in a joking tone but beamed kindly at him to show that I wasn't upset.

"I'm so glad." He let out a weak chuckle and a relieved sigh in return. Even though he still seemed a bit nervous, his smile was really adorable. In the middle of my admiring, the nameless boy kept talking to me. "If you don't mind me asking, _(M/N)_ right?" I nodded happily. "Why are you here?"

"Oh I'm here to pick up Toni," I answered easily. "Who are you? Are you Romano's brother or something?"

"O-oh yes! How rude oh me!" He stuck a hand out towards me, a bright smile now taking over his face. "Ciao, I'm Feliciano."

I smiled effortlessly and took his hand, shaking it. "_(M/N)_. Pleasure to meet you." When we let go I looked at my dirtied sunglasses and saw that the lenses where completely covered in red sauce. I let out a quiet, hopeless sigh as I inspected them. There was going to be sauce in all of the crevices and I'll never be able to get them out. Man…

"I-I'm sorry about your glasses, _(M/N)_," he apologized again, sounding absolutely guilty. God, he was cute.

I laughed at the kicked puppy look on his face. "It's cool. You're lucky you're so cute or I might have made you buy me a new pair," I flirted shamelessly. Hey, after living with Francis, Antonio and Gilbert all of these years makes flirting almost my second nature.

Feliciano's face turned pink. "O-oh…" His eyes were suddenly glued to my shoes as he twisted the forgotten, dirty towel in his hands.

"I just can't see how you and that other guy are related," I said smoothly.

He turned those big doe eyes back up top me. "V-vee? Why?"

"You are way too sweet and innocent to be associated with that mean little guy," I flirted persistently, causing the little Italian to flush red. "Not to mention that it seems that you can cook." I motioned towards the stove.

Feliciano seemed to sparkle at the mention of food. "Sì! I'm making sauce for my pastaaa~!" He sang as he skipped back over to the stove. I watched as he seemed to forget about me and attend to the simmering pasta sauce. Okay, so far on my growing list of Feliciano's good points: He's cute, he's sweet, he can cook and he has a nice behind. No lie.

I decided to set down my ruined glasses on a nearby countertop. I crossed my arms and leaned against the countertop as well, enjoying the view of Feliciano's swishing hips. Francis must seriously be rubbing off on me if I was standing there in the middle of someone's kitchen checking out their brother's ass.

All of a sudden, a hand smacked me upside the head. "Keep your eyes to yourself, bastardo!"

"Ow! What the heck Romano! I wasn't even doing anything," I grumbled as I rubbed the back of my head.

"What are you doing in here anyway? I didn't say what you could come into my kitchen!" Romano nagged.

I scoffed as I shoved my hands into the pockets of my pants. I shrugged carelessly, looking anywhere but at him. "I smelled food and I ended up here."

"Fat ass," he growled.

"Tight ass," I retorted.

Antonio made himself known(now with a shirt on) and grabbed Romano by the shoulder before he could go for my throat. "Easy there, Roma." The Spaniard threw me a look over his shoulder as he began steering his angry boyfriend towards the door. "I'll be in the car, okay amigo?"

I smirked as I shooed him away. "Yeah, Sì, Sì. ¡Vaya, vaya!(Yes, yes. Go, go!)" I said mockingly in Spanish. Being friends with Antonio made me almost fluent in Spanish.(Learning German from Gilbert was almost as easy but French from Francis was hard.) Antonio stuck his tongue out at me as he pushed Romano out the door.

"Vee? You're leaving?" I looked over and saw that Feliciano was looking sadly at me with a large wooden spoon covered with sauce in his hand.

"Yeah, I just came to get Toni," I said with a apologetic smile. "But, maybe you and Romano can come over sometime. You know, if you ever wanted too," I said casually yet the mischievous grin on my face probably said other wise.

Blushing once again, Feliciano nodded at me. A shy smile tugging at his lips. "S-sure…"

Satisfied by the pink on his cheeks I started walking towards the door. "See ya, Feli." I was halfway through opening the door when Feliciano called after me. I turned and saw that he was holding my sunglasses splattered with pasta sauce in his hand.

"W-wait! You almost forgot your glasses!"

I shook my head, the grin seeming to be plastered to my face was ever-present as I looked at him. "Keep them. They're ruined anyway. But hey," by this point I had walked away from the door and right up to Feliciano, "if you want to make it up to me, you could make me pasta sometime. I'd love to try it," I said sounding charmingly sweet.

I could here the little Italian gulp before he started stuttering. "H-huh? Well-l, um…V-vee?"

I couldn't help but giggle(it was a manly giggle, damn it.) at the flustered, golden eyed beauty. I leaned down and brushed the bangs away from his forehead, planting a light kiss on his tan forehead. "Ciao, Feli," I purred seductively before walking with my head held high all the way tot the car.

When I approached the car I saw Antonio and Romano locking lips by the passenger door. I didn't say anything, I just walked to the driver's side, pulled open the door and slammed it shut as loud as possible, causing the couple to jump. Romano's cheeks flared red as he glared mercilessly at me, Antonio simply gave me a halfhearted frown. I gave them both a bright, impish smile with lots of teeth as I climbing into the car.

"See you around, Romano!" I waved at him with fake enthusiasm through Antonio's open door as he also got into the vehicle. I started up the car and began backing out the car from the driveway but then I rolled down my window and called out to him, "Oh, and tell you're brother that I'll be looking forward to hear from him!"

Romano let out an indignant squawked, his feathers obviously ruffed by my words. I snickered evilly to myself as I sped off. The last thing I saw out of my rearview mirror was that Romano was holding a small nearby rock, rearing back his arm so that he could throw it at my car. "Bastardo!" He screeched.

~Extended Ending~

Feliciano stood frozen in the doorway, his heart thumping franticly against his chest. He was sure that his face was absolutely glowing red. _(M/N)_ wanted to see him again? The very though of him made Feliciano's stomach flutter like butterflies. When his brother began stomping his way back up to the house, grumbling to himself, Feliciano snapped out of his smitten trance. He looked genuinely concerned at Romano. "Fratello? What's wrong?"

Romano seethed, slamming the door closed behind him when he got inside. "That damn _(M/N)_! I hate him! I hope he chokes on his own spit and dies!"

Feliciano fiddled with _(M/N)_'s sunglasses nervously. "Vee~ that's mean, Romano!"

He scowled, glaring at his brother. "Pft, whatever! I don't care if…" His voice trailed off and his gaze trailled down to Feliciano's fumbling fingers. "…Are those his sunglasses?"

Feliciano tensed. "U-u-u-m-"

Before he could finish, Romano quickly snatched the sunglasses away and held them above his head, ready to smash the them onto the floor. "Grrr! Io così molto l'odio!(I hate him so much!)"

Feliciano franticly made a grab for them, tears hanging from the corners of his eyes. "Wah! No! Please!"

THE END

DID THIS ALL IN ONE SITTING, BITCHES. B)