Chapter One:
Warnings: Talk of suicide and light abuse. Descriptive self-harm.
Blaine's messages.
Kurt's messages.
Disclaimer: I do not own glee or anything else mentioned in here that does not belong to me. All rights go to their specific designated owner.
Blaine had no idea how he had found the blog. Well he did know how, after all he had visited it many times in the past couple of months. It all started when he was sitting next to The Warblers at lunch and they were talking to the new kid Kurt Hummel about what he liked to do when he mentioned his blog. Blaine didn't mean to eavesdrop but he couldn't help his shy self. Later that night when Blaine actually found the site he read through all of the old posts. They were about how Kurt had been bullied and how he was getting through it. His words really meant a lot to Blaine since he was still getting bullied despite Daltons no bullying policy. Of course it wasn't as bad as it was at his old school but it was still there.
On this night though, he had screamed his way through yet another fight with his father. And before he could comprehend things he was being hit in the face. Blaine ran out of his house as fast as he could and sped down the highway back to Dalton. This moment he was back in his dorm he pulled his laptop out and pulled up the blog-his now home page. Blaine's hands were shaking. Kurt always posts at the end of every entry that if anyone needed to talk about anything he was there. Blaine tried to message him from his account multiple times but ended up backing out. He just felt so stupid. So many emotions were running through the curly headed Dalton boys mind. He knew for a fact how easy it would be if he wasn't around. He was shy so he had no friends and his family hated that he was gay. In actuality his older brother Cooper was the only one who would miss him and he could manage.
He scrunched his eyes closed taking shuddering breathes as he thought. There was a bottle of sleeping pills in the medicine cabinet since he's a bit of an insomniac. Down the whole bottle, you worthless fag. His shaving razors, he just got new ones yesterday. Break it and get the blade, you little shit. Blaine's mind ran through all the possibilities of what he could do to get it over with and he started hyperventilating. As quickly as he could Blaine pulled up Kurt's ask again. He debated making it anonymous but he only made the account to follow Kurt so it's not like Kurt would figure out who he is Blaine decided. He sighed, tears falling down his cheeks as he typed.
To kurtieh: I think I'm going to kill myself.
The reply was almost instantaneous.
To Daltonboy: No! Please don't! Talk to me and tell me what's going on instead.
To kurtieh: I don't know if I can. Blaine typed as quickly as he could through the tears. I can't, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bothered you. You're probably busy.
To Daltonboy: No I'm not. My glee clubs practice isn't until later. Please talk to me. Tell me your name. How old are you? Favorite color? Favorite movie? Anything, everything, just please.
To kurtieh: I'm almost seventeen. My favorite color is green. I really like the Harry Potter movies or anything Disney. My coffee order is a medium drip. I'm really short. I'm gay.
To Daltonboy: I like Disney movies too (: My favorite color is blue. And I'm guessing that by your username that you go to Dalton Academy. In Westerville right?
To kurtieh: Yea I do. Since the middle of my freshman year.
To Daltonboy: That's really cool, DB. I wish I could've been here that long.
To kurtieh: DB?
To Daltonboy: daltonboy. DB, since you still haven't told me your name.
To kurtieh: I'm sorry I just can't..
To Daltonboy: No worries. I have to get going but I'm going to give you my number so you can call or text me whenever you need.
Ten minutes later and Blaine was still staring at the newly added contact to his phone. He then glanced at the time and jumped up. The Warblers rehearsal was going on and he always enjoyed listening in on their songs. Tossing his phone down he ran from the room as not to miss anything.
It had been a long day for Kurt. A long day but not a bad one. Kurt just couldn't wait to get back to his dorm and check on his blog. He loved posting and reading all of the things people wrote to him. He had started it during the middle of his sophomore year. Now it's the middle of his junior year and the blog grows more and more every day. Once sat down on his bed with his laptop in front of him Kurt pulled up his ask box to read threw some things and answer back to people. There were typical compliments and basic questions but what really caught his eye was a message from an account name he had never seen before.
To kurtieh: I think I'm going to kill myself.
Kurt panicked typing a quick response. He knew the feeling that there was nothing left to do but end your life. The feeling that no one was there to help you or understand what you're going through. He promised himself once he saw that message that he would be there for this boy and since he went to Dalton he would try to find him.
Kurt was distracted all through Warbler rehearsal and it didn't go unnoticed by the council or his friends Nick and Jeff.
"This meeting is adjourned the rest of you may go but Warbler Kurt please stay," Wes stated pointing to the couch after Kurt stood up. Once Kurt was seated Wes spoke again. "Are you okay, Kurt?"
"What?" Kurt's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "I'm fine. Why do you ask?"
"You seem a little distracted," Nick pointed out sitting beside his friend and Jeff occupied the empty spot on his other side.
"I'm not it's just… You all know my blog right?" After all of them gave their nods Kurt continued. "Well this afternoon someone from this school wrote me saying they wanted to kill themselves. They wouldn't tell me who they are and I'm a bit worried."
The group's eyes widened. "He didn't do it right?" Jeff asked tearing up. He was sensitive and even the thought of someone hurting themselves broke his heart. Nick reached over to squeeze his hand comfortingly as Kurt spoke again.
"No I… I don't think so I just don't know what to do. I wish I could help him but he just won't tell me who he is."
"Maybe you should tell the dean," David offered "I mean if there is a chance he could hurt himself maybe they have a way of figuring out who he is and can help him."
Kurt just shook his head with a sigh. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Kurt stood. "I'm gonna head back to my room now but thank you all for your advice." They all murmured goodbyes and Kurt practically ran back to his room wanting to take a hot shower to collect his many thoughts.
Blaine hadn't really contacted Kurt again until a week later. Of course he replied to every text Kurt sent though but they never had a real conversation. Kurt would send a good morning, hop you're having a good day, and good night text. Blaine would always reply good morning, you too, and goodnight. He hadn't had any real need to talk to him again until Saturday night.
Blaine had to go back to his house. He didn't want to but he had left his lyrics notebook there, normally he would've noticed its absence right away but he had too much homework to sit down and write. That's why on Saturday when he expected both of his parents t be at work he journeyed back to get it. This turned out to be a big mistake when his dad came home early. Blaine was coming down the stairs when his dad shoved him against the wall and hit him. Blaine gasped as he was hit again and again on his cheek. His dad dropped one more blow, to his abdomen this time, before releasing Blaine and heading upstairs. Blaine scrambled to his feet and ran out of the house to his jeep. He drove fast, faster than the last time, to Dalton. Once in his dorm he scrambled to the bathroom pulling a razor out of the package. As he slammed it down on the counter in attempt to break it open he observed the bruise already forming on his cheek bone. He just smashed harder and let out a satisfied sigh as he fished one of the blades out. It was shaking in Blaine's fingers and he fell back against the wall sinking to the ground. As Blaine brought the razor to his wrist he remembered every punch his dad delivered to him today.
He slid the blade across four times before pausing to watch the blood drip down. Blaine closed his eyes feeling sick as drops fell to the floor. He tried taking deep breathes but with everyone he felt light-headed. Quickly he pounced to the sink shoving his wrist under the faucet to rinse the cuts out. After they were cleaned and bandage and the floor was cleaned up Blaine lay back on his bed with his phone. He didn't know how to start the message. He didn't even think he should tell Kurt at first, how do you tell that to someone? But Blaine knew he had to do the right thing and besides he knew Kurt would help.
To Kurt: I'm really sorry.
To DB: Why are you sorry?
To Kurt: I did something bad.
To DB: Bad like what? You're freaking me out just tell me.
To Kurt: I hurt myself. And I am so so sorry.
To DB: It's going to be okay. Why did you do it?
To Kurt: My dad hit me..
To DB: He what?! I swear once you tell me your name I'm going to kill him!
To Kurt: Don't waste your time. It's not your fault that I'm a worthless fag.
To DB: Don't say that! I'm sure you're amazing. From what you already told me you are. I wish you would just tell me your name.
To Kurt: Me too…
Author's Note:
I Have plans for this story so please enjoy. Follow and review. Reviews make my life :D