Paladin: Wrote this just to get going again. Feel free to point out flaws. This is the first thing I've written in…oi, I don't even want to think about it. Thanks.

Summary: Hiro and Shuichi finally admit it. :: Hiro/Shu written just to get writing again

Hiro knew who was knocking on his door at two in the morning. It was always the same person. Shuichi would knock, gently at first, and then eventually ring the doorbell. Hiro would stumble out of bed, throw open the door to let his best friend in, and would always be greeted with the same expression. Sometimes he would be crying still, sometimes the tears were gone, but still, that sad heartbroken look always reflected in his eyes. Hiro would always hold out an arm and Shuichi would fall against him. They would stumble back to Hiro's bed and sleep the rest of the night, Hiro with his arm protectively around his best friend's waist. This had become such a regular occurrence they would not even need to speak. Tonight, however, something was different.

"Hiro," Shuichi whispered as soon as he fell against him, "what is it about me that…."

Hiro sighed, tired beyond belief. "You know better than that. There is nothing wrong with you. Do you understand? Nothing."

He started to shake his head, but Hiro caught his face between his hands. "Don't do this to yourself, Shu, who do you trust more? Him or me?"

Shuichi hesitated for a moment. He blinked, looking confused. It was all the answer Hiro needed. "Why did you run away this time? Hm? Did he yell at you, call you a name? Did he hit you again?" He asked, his voice lowering. He couldn't keep the venom from his tone. It was getting harder to ignore. He wasn't sure if he should ignore it anymore, no matter how much Shuichi begged.

"No."

"Then what?" Hiro asked, hating that Shu's eyes filled with tears all over again. He could see he didn't want to talk about it. Why had he made him? The pain in his chest caused by Shu's tears was almost unbearable.

"He was with….someone…."

So, was cheating what it took? After all the heartache…surely Shu wouldn't stand for this? "Oh, Shuichi." Hiro held him close, squeezing his shoulders. "Leave him." He whispered in his ear.

"And then what?" Shuichi's words hurt to the bone.

"Then you move on, and you forget about him." Hiro whispered.

"Is it possible to forget?" His eyes were so hopeful when he turned them towards Hiro. "Is it really?"

Hiro didn't really know. It had been almost six years since he realized just how much his best friend meant to him. He still hadn't forgotten. "Of course." He did his best to smile. He thought it worked. "Come on. You can have my bed tonight if you want it."

"I'd rather you…." Shuichi trailed off, looking at Hiro through his bangs expectantly. Hiro smiled, knowing what he was hinting at, and despairing because he knew he couldn't give it. Even if it was Shuichi asking him, he just couldn't bring himself to do it. Shuichi was in love with someone else, it was as simple as that. Hiro just couldn't stand the heartache. It was bad enough now, without the physical side of a relationship.

"Go on, I'll take the couch."

"You've always stayed with me before. Why is tonight different?"

Hiro swallowed hard. It was difficult to breathe. Everything was just so perfect. It would be so easy to take advantage of the situation. Shuichi looked perfectly ready to do just that. He raised his hand slowly, brushing his fingertips against the fabric of Hiro's shirt. His eyes were bright, lips parted. Was this what he looked like while he was seducing him?

Hiro took a step back, out of his reach. "Shuichi." Hiro shook his head. His chest was tight.

Shuichi shrugged. "Why not?"

"Because," Hiro whispered, dropping his head. "That's not fair."

Hiro looked up, reached for him. Shuichi leaned against him, wrapping his arms around Hiro's neck when he slipped his fingers just under the edge of his shirt. He put his mouth close to Shu's ear and kissed it gently before he whispered, "If I do whatever you what tonight, what will happen in the morning?"

"Hm?"

"We both know he won't call, Shuichi. He won't come looking for you. He won't even admit if he cares you're gone."

"Yeah I know." Shuichi sighed, and Hiro placed another kiss just in front of his ear.

"So, will you go back to him? Even after you know how I feel and how much I want you myself?" Hiro unconsciously held his breath.

"You mean…you'd still want me in the morning?" He looked up hopefully.

"I'll always want you." His answer was easy, not rehearsed, and it was so easy for Shuichi to see how true his words actually were.

"What will happen in the morning?" Shuichi asked slowly. Hiro raised an eyebrow and waited for him to finish. "Well, I guess you can start helping me forget."

"Really? Your sure?" Hiro asked, gently wiping away the one tear that fell. He waited for Shuichi to nod, then tilted his head up and kissed him passionately. "That sounds like a wonderful idea."