"Is this the place?" Ron asked, looking around at his surroundings. Hermione looked down at the letter, staring at the loopy handwriting that was distinctively Luna's. "I think so," she said finally, also taking the time to look around.
This was certainly not where she had expected Luna to be staying. They were deep in the heart of London, surrounded overhead by towering skyscrapers and apartment blocks. The building in front of her stood twenty stories tall, its exterior an array of glass panels and metal beams. Hermione frowned as her gaze shifted from story to story. "Ron, Luna said that she is staying on the thirtieth floor right? Well this building only has twenty floors."
Ron looked up, counting under his breath. "Well I guess that we are in the wrong place after all." "Ron!" He jerked his head back, wondering who was calling him. He saw two familiar faces approaching them. "Harry, Ginny. She invited you too?"
"We got a letter, if that is what you are asking," Harry replied. "Is this the place?" "I don't think so mate, the address is wrong." They were just about to leave when a familiar face appeared at the door.
"Luna," Ginny greeted. She was about to move forward to hug her friend when she stopped short. Luna definitely did not look like the same girl whom they had left after graduating. "She is wearing a ki…ka…umm…that Japanese dress." "Kimono," Hermione corrected her friend absentmindedly. She was right though, Luna indeed was wearing a kimono.
Ron stepped towards her, walking around while appreciating the fine fabric. Finally he stood in front of her, "Umm Luna you are wearing it wrongly. Wrapping it around you with the right on top of the left is only used to dress a corpse for burial."
Ginny seemed rather impressed by her brother's new found knowledge. "Looks like Hermione has been a good influence for my brother," she whispered to Harry. Harry shrugged, "I think that is Hermione who likes to play dress up, Ron just follows along for the ride." Ginny coloured, imagining Hermione dressed up as a geisha to 'entertain' Ron.
"You want to try that too?" Harry whispered into her ear, turning her an even more scarlet shade of red. She turned to her husband and whispered back, "I think I can still fit into my old school robes." She gave a soft giggle as her husband turned a shade of red.
Luna ushered them into the lift lobby, her pace slowed down by the tightness of her clothes. The lobby was brightly lit, with metal gleaming everywhere. They stood around in silence, as they waited for the lift to arrive.
"What are we waiting for?" Ron suddenly said. "The elevator," Harry replied absentmindedly. "The what?" Ron said, a puzzled look dawning on his face. "It is a muggle device to take you to a higher floor," Hermione explained. "Like an escalator?" Ron asked. His question was interrupted by a soft chime, and the elevator doors slid open in front of him. Ron jumped back in surprise, not expecting a door to suddenly open in front of him.
Luna walked into the elevator, followed closely by Harry and Ginny. Following their example, Ron followed suit, Hermione just in front of him. Even before the doors were completely shut, the elevator had already began to move. By the time they were completely shut, they were already moving at a terrific speed, and they were showing no sign of slowing down.
Even Harry, conditioned as he was with travelling at such high speeds, was staggered at how fast they were moving. It was much worse for Hermione, she was already holding Ron in a death grip, fighting to keep the bile from rising any further up her stomach. "How long more?" Ginny asked, her voice strained.
Only Luna seemed to take no notice of this, staring fixedly at the mass of buttons ahead of her. Her long blonde hair began to float medusa-like from the acceleration.
'At this speed, stopping was suicide.' Hermione thought, gripping even tighter onto Ron's arm, not caring that blood was starting to well up under her nails.
Suddenly they came to a stop, but instead of being thrown around, they were rooted to the floor. " Thirtieth floor," Luna said as the elevator doors opened.
Hermione rushed out, her face green. Ginny barely trusted her shaking legs, leaned on Harry for support as they stumbled out. "What a ride," Ron said, but he looked rather pale. His attention sprung to his wife, who was bending over by the elevator door, taking in deep breathes.
"Where are we?" Harry asked, as Luna walked up to the large oak door just in front of them. "The thirtieth floor, this is my house." Luna said without looking back, she waved her wand and the door creaked open ominously.
"Isn't there a better way to get up here?" Hermione asked, looking much better. She did not much fancy another trip in the elevator. "Well there is the stairs, but that would take much longer," Luna said thoughtfully. "How much longer?" Ron asked. "It depends on how fast you can walk, but maybe an hour or two." Ron's face just dropped.
Luna did not notice, as she entered her house. The house was not what they had expected from a witch, and everything they expected from Luna. Which was to say that it was very strange indeed. The house was virtually empty and there what windows were there were entirely obscured by clouds.
"Your house looks," Hermione searched for a word to use, "nice." "Thank you," Luna replied not noticing the hesitation in her voice. "Come on, it is over here," she said, walking off to the right then disappearing into the corridor.
"Here it is," Luna said, pointing at large panel at one corner of the room. "Doesn't look very special," Ron muttered under his breath, earning himself a glare from Hermione.
Ginny ignored her brother, moving to take a closer look. The panel sat a few centimetres above an ordinary looking table, floating in mid air. Directly in front of it, a small hole was sat into the table.
Luna waved her wand and a blue image appeared on the panel. Hermione frowned, "That is a blue screen of death." Ron paled as he began to step back from the image. "I think that we had better leave, no point tempting a cursed object."
Harry and Ginny laughed as Ron continued to back away. He was almost at the door when Hermione reached over and began to drag him back. "Nobody is going to die, it is a muggle expression."
"Dad used to get it very often on his kneetop," Ginny interjected. "Laptop," Harry corrected her gently. "So it is not a grim, nobody is going to die." Ron said with a sigh of relief. "Well it does mean that the operating system has committed a fatal error, so in a way it is going to die." Hermione said simply, ignoring the blank look Ron was giving her.
"Is that so? I thought that it was a normal function of a muggle computer." Luna said. "Well it does happen quite often," Hermione admitted. "So what does it do?" Ron said rather impatiently, now that he had gotten over his fear.
"Well, it forms a consensus on a topic that is produced by calculating the various ideas formed in the minds of a population," Luna said at one go.
"Oh," Hermione's face lit up with enthusiasm. "So it is based on Bayes' theorem of subject probability. The theorem which is suppose to quantify the value of the hunch, factoring in the knowledge that exists in people beyond their conscious mind." Hermione said animatedly.
Harry looked to Ginny, who returned it with a look just as blank as his. Then he looked at Ron, who was listening with rapt attention as Hermione continued to spew out a myriad of complex terms and calculations.
"How do you do it?" Harry whispered out of the corner of his mouth. "I imagine that she is the professor and I am the student trying to stare down her robes," Ron replied nonchalantly. Harry barely managed to contain his laughter.
Hermione finally finished her tirade, an excited look on her face. "And it actually works?" Hermione said finally. "Does what actually work?" Ron said, his question still unanswered. Hermione looked to Luna, who just waved her on. "Think of it as mental voting, it takes the opinion of a group and displays it." "Is that legal?" Ginny asked. All eyes swung to Hermione, who could only shrug. "I don't know, something like this has never even been attempted before."
A shocked silence descended upon the group. "What?" Hermione said finally, breaking the stillness. Ron spoke first, "I was fixing that moment in my mind, the one moment when Hermione finally admitted that she does not know." "There are plenty of things that I don't know," Hermione retorted. "But so much more that you do know," Ginny pointed out.
"Snape did call you a know-it-all," Luna said with her characteristic bluntness. "Why don't you show us how it works," Harry prompted Luna, defusing the situation as all their attention turned back to the panel.
"Well, all you have to do is stick your wand into the hole and it will go to work," Luna said simply. "Put your wand into the hole," Ron sniggered, earning himself a sharp rap on the head from Hermione.
Harry shared a look with Ginny, then approached the panel, his wand out. Looking once more to Ginny, as if for reassurance, he plunged his wand into the hole. Immediately, the blue screen disappeared, replaced by picture of Harry, accompanied by the words "Processing".
"How big is the sample size?" Hermione asked. "Just over two hundred and thirty thousand," Luna said, watching as Hermione's jaw dropped. "That many?" Hermione gasped.
The others were not listening to the conversation, instead they were staring transfixed as the bar below Harry's picture slowly began to fill with butterbeer corks. When it was filled to the brim, the bar disappeared.
"Hey, that is me," Ginny said in surprise. True enough, where once Harry stood, he was now joined on the right by a portrait of Ginny. All four of them turned to Luna for an explanation.
"It means that most of the people think that Harry should be with Ginny." Luna answered. "Neat." Ron said awe-struck. " You can scroll through their other opinions with the wand," Luna said, giving the wand a deft tap to the right.
Ginny's portrait disappeared to be replaced by Hermione's beaming one. "Well the thought did come to my mind," Harry said sheepishly, as Ron pulled Hermione into a possessive hug.
"Well we were best of friends since your first year, it kind of seems natural for feelings to develop. And it did work out in the end for Ron and me, even if it took him ruddy long to realize I was a girl," Hermione finished with a small laugh.
"I did notice," Ron retorted. "No you didn't," both Harry and Ginny shut back. "You were rather slow," Luna added.
Ron looked as if he wanted to argue, then held his tongue. "Fine I was slow. Now lets see what other lovers people think Harry should take." Ron said finally.
Harry obliged, tapping his wand right again. Several more portraits appeared and disappeared, Harry's past girlfriends before realising that Ginny was the one.
Several more students from Hogwarts flashed by, associating Harry with everyone from Cho Chang, to Romilda Vane, and even Pansy Parkinson. They would have missed it if Ron had not pointed it out.
"Hey isn't that," Ron stopped short, stunned momentarily into silence. Their former potions master was staring at them from the panel. "Maybe they think you are gay," Luna suggested. Harry did not answer, he was still trying to get his mouth to work. "Harry is not gay!" Ginny said indignantly, then glanced to Harry, "You are not right?" "Well he did marry you," Hermione said, trying frantically to erase the image of Harry and Snape in bed. "Maybe Harry is bisexual?" Luna suggested, earning her an angry glare from Ginny.
The Gryffindor in Harry arose, 'It cannot possibly get worse than this,' he told himself steadfastly. Ignoring the others, he pushed his wand to the right again. His yell brought everyone's attention back to the panel.
Snape's portrait was gone, replaced by… "What kind of person thinks Harry should be with that thing?" Ron said, his voice shaking slightly. "I think that somebody else should have a go," Hermione said, trying to break the tension in the room. "I agree," Ginny said, moving beside Harry, moving his hand to pull out his wand.
On the panel, the absurd image of Harry and Lord Voldemort winked out of existence. Harry continued to stare at the blue image that currently was on the panel, as if still in shock at what he had seen. "Perhaps I should have a go," Ginny said to the room at large. She glanced back, everyone still seemed to be trying to make sense of what they had just seen. Giving a small shrug, she slotted her wand into the hole.
Immediately the blue screen disappeared, replaced by a portrait of Ginny and the countdown. They waited patiently, as the bar finally filled up with butterbeer corks. They were awarded by a mirror image of Harry's first picture. "Well at least people seem to agree that we should be together," Harry grumbled, still angry at the fact that some people out there associated him with Voldemort.
Suddenly Harry's portrait shrunk and floated to the top of the screen. "Wow, I have never seen that happen before," Luna said gazing dreamily at the panel. "What do you mean you have never seen that before, you created the ruddy thing." Ron replied. Below Harry portrait was another one, this time of a plutonium blond. "And what is Draco doing with my sister?"
"I think that it is a tie," Luna replied, swishing her wand round near the panel. "Are you telling me that people think that Ginny should be with that ferret git?" "Well he is quite handsome," Luna said dreamily. "And he does look quite good," Ginny added thoughtfully. Ron looked to Hermione for some support. "Well, well…he is not that bad," Hermione finished lamely. Ron just sighed.
Wondering what else would appear, Ginny nudged her wand to the right. Both Draco and Harry's portraits disappeared. Instead Hermione's portrait appeared in their place. "Now this has possibilities," Ron said, then suddenly realised that it was his sister that he was talking about, and turned scarlet.
"Sometimes Ron you can be such a git," Hermione said, but her voice held no anger. Instead she shared a sly look with Ginny, who smiled in return. Harry noticed it, but did not say anything. "Lets see who else is in there," Ginny said cheerfully, moving to the next portrait.
"Tom," Ginny said under her breath, her face ashen. "Who is that? Some secret lover?" Ron chided his sister. "Ron!" Hermione said disapprovingly, noting both Harry's and Ginny's white face. "I think it is your turn Hermione," Ginny said meekly, withdrawing her wand, erasing the images before Ron could make another comment.
"Okay," Hermione said as she walked pass Ginny to take her place in front of the panel. Taking out her vine wood wand, she plugged it in. Immediately, the panel displayed that familiar screen of processing and butterbeer corks.
Hermione braced herself as the butterbeer corks disappeared, then let out a sigh of relief, as Hermione's and Ron's portrait appeared on the panel. "At least they agree on that," she said to the room at large. Then plucking up her courage, she nudged her wand to the right. And again. And again.
"What do they think I am?" Hermione said, anger evident in her voice. The last portrait was taunting her with its mere existence. "Come on, it is not that bad," Ron said comfortingly, putting his arm around her. "What do you mean it is not that bad," Hermione said heatedly.
"They…they think that I am some whore to be passed around among deatheaters." "At least they did not think that you should be with Voldemort," Ginny said comfortingly. "Lucius Malfoy or Severus Snape is not much better," Hermione replied. "At least they are human, Voldemort could barely even be considered that."
Hermione sighed, "You are right, no point getting angry over the opinions of others." Even then she gave an angry glare at the portrait of Lucius Malfoy, before pulling out her wand. "Your turn," Hermione said to her husband, vacating her place.
"Maybe I should not," Ron said, not moving forward. "Oh no, you are not getting away from this," Ginny said. Hermione poked him in the back, "You are not leaving till you have tried it out," Hermione said, then leaned closer. "Or are you afraid?" s she whispered into his ear.
Ron blinked, thought for a moment, then slotted the wand home. With a grim face, he waited for the results. It was not what he had expected.
Instead of Ron and Hermione, it showed Ron and the boy who lived.
"Maybe it means that we are really good friends?" Ron suggested hopefully. "Somehow I don't think that is how it works," Hermione deadpanned. Harry and Ron both stared at each other, coloured red, then quickly looked away.
"Come on you two, it is not that bad. After all you two are really good friends, some people may have just misunderstood you. Besides it is definitely not worse than Harry and Voldemort," Ginny said. Ron shivered slightly as that name, then nodded.
'Nothing could be worse than that,' Ron thought, as he pushed the wand to the right. Harry's portrait disappeared, to be replaced by to a very familiar red head. Very familiar indeed.
"Percy!"
Fin
/Looking for a beta, anyone interested? Contact me at icym666 at hotmail dot com