HaRRY Potter and Aperture Science
Chapter 1: Prologue
Summary: When Harry Potter is left with the Dursleys, his name is written into Vernon computer. Meanwhile, a certain Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System is searching the globe for any trace of the children of Caroline, two girls who were put up for adoption after their mother's disappearance in 1987. Their names were Lily Evans, before her marriage to a James Potter; and Petunia Evans, before her marriage to Vernon Dursley.
A/N: Here, Harry's parents died in 2001 instead of 1981. Harry's first year at Hogwarts is 2011 instead of 1991. So, 20 years forward. Also ignore that Half-Life shares the same canon as Portal.
Chapter 1: Prologue
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Vernon Dursley was not having a good night.
He and his wife, Petunia, were eating their normal dinner with their ordinary year-old son when the traditional doorbell rang.
"I'll get it," He said, seeing Petunia was busy feeding Dudley. After a moment of struggle against his own weight, he got out of his chair and answered the door. He saw no one there and was about to dismiss it as a prank before he heard a sound at his feet. Looking down, he saw a child on his doorstep with an envelope in its grip.
As it turns out, Petunia's freak of a sister had a son, and for some reason known only to God, the weirdos wanted him and his lovely wife to take care of the tiny wizard after the toddler's parents got themselves killed by a monster of an oddity.
Then, he and Petunia had to figure out what to tell the neighbors, what to tell their son, and what to tell the anomaly that has barged into their innocent average house.
After a long nights discussion, Vernon sat down at his computer and wrote down the day's events in his digital journal for future reference, so his son would read his notes and know the trials Vernon Dursley had to endure.
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Deep within the disused salt mines below Upper Michigan, an electronic eye found what it was looking for.
"There you are." stated a synthetic voice. "Its time to get the androids out of storage."
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The next day, Vernon Dursley was awoken by the doorbell. When he answered the door he saw the most ordinary man he had ever seen. If you were to ask anyone to describe the man a moment after they had seen him, they wouldn't have been able to describe him other than average. It was like some omniscient being had taken the data of over a thousand men, took the most common features, and then forged them together into the form of the odd man on the Dursleys' doorstep. Even the suit he wore and the briefcase he carried was average, for businessmen, at least. Though, his voice was a bit strange.
"Hello," said the main in an emotionless and clearly pronounced tone. "Are you Mr. Dursley?"
"Yes, yes I am." said Vernon, surprised to be bothered so early in the morning.
"The husband of Petunia Dursley, maiden name Evans? Father of Dudley Dursley?"
"Yes." said Vernon, growing guarded by this stranger who knew so much.
"Uncle of a Mr. Harry Potter?"
At this, Vernon froze, and shivered with barely concealed hostility. "Are you one of them?"
The man gave a confused look, feigning ignorance. "One of who?"
The man, in fact, did know of wizards and witches. Vernon had mentioned them in detail in the journal entry that described Harry's sudden arrival; and She always made sure Her underlings knew what they needed to know.
At the man's questioning, Vernon relaxed, but not completely. "Nevermind. What do you want?"
"My name is Thomas Rookery, and I am here because my employer wishes to adopt Harry because my employer's biological sister is Harry's mother, and she feels guilty about never once visiting her family." said the man, Once again without emotion in his voice or on his face.
Vernon was confused. "Petunia never mentioned another sister."
"As your wife could explain to you, Mr. and Mrs. Evans, were incapable of having children. Petunia and Lily Evans, while related by blood, where adopted simultaneously by the Evans. My employer is the daughter of the biological parents who put the sisters up for adoption."
It took a second for Vernon to wrap his head around what this man was saying before the realization hit him like lightning. Here was some non-magical relative of his wife's sister practically begging to take the freak off of their hands. In a second, Mr. Dursley went from frosty to friendly.
"Come on in, join us for breakfast. I would love to talk to about poor Harry's fate. I can't imagine what he'll go through without parents." said Vernon, trying to win as much goodwill from his new found godsend.
After they entered the house, Vernon only waited till the moment his guest had a seat before he hastily excused himself and ran to the kitchen where Petunia was making breakfast. After a brief explanation to his wife, they went to the dining room, where his guest was waiting.
"Good Morning, Mrs. Dursley." said the emotionless man.
"Good Morning." she said quickly, impatience getting the best of her. "You wish to adopt Harry?" she asked bluntly.
"Not me, my employer. My employer is the child of the biological mother of Lily Potter, and when she heard what happened to the sister she never met, she wanted to ask your permission to raise the child in order to get intact with the family she neglected." explained the mysterious man with a mixture of truths and lies.
Petunia quickly asked, "What is it you think happened to Lily?" She stared at the man intently, as if he was a snake about to strike. He didn't look like a wizard, but one could never be too sure around their sort.
"The car accident, of coarse. Are we mistaken?" asked the man without any emotion, only curiosity.
"No, you're quite right, though how did you find out so fast? We only found out last night when the child was given to us." Petunia was carefully asking all the questions she could to insure that the man was honest in being non-magical. She didn't care if he was honest about adopting the kid, as long as he takes it. The hatred Petunia felt for Lily didn't diminish in the slightest, Death or no.
"My employer is a very powerful woman. When the police found their car, some of her friends took note of the news and passed it on." The man was lying. The wizards didn't even bother giving an official explanation to non-magical authorities since the killing had happened in a magical neighborhood. The Dursleys didn't know that, and they wouldn't care long enough to find out.
"Do you have proof of this?" asked Vernon.
At this, the man opened his briefcase and gave them many official looking papers proving his employment at Aperture Science, Inc.; his employer's identity as Gladys Johnson; Gladys' relation to Lily Potter proven through blood tests; and the adoption papers, ready to be signed. They were all fake, but they were excellent forgeries that only an expert would catch.
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Later that day, Mr. T. Rookery left 4 Privet Drive in Little Whinging with a child in his hands. He had left the briefcase and the fake papers in one of the neighbor's yard. He struggled to get his cell phone out of his pocket and next to his ear without dropping the child. After entering a 32 digit number into the phone, he brought it to his ear and said. "I have the subject. Objective accomplished."
There was no response, but he wasn't expecting any. However, he was curious about his first job in a decade. Before he ended the call, he asked the question that has been on his mind all day. "Why do you want him?"
A brief silence preceded a mechanical female voice. "For a test of magical proportions." Then the line went dead. A portal opened up on the sidewalk near Thomas' feet, and through the portal was a room made of cold metal and euclidean geometry.
The android looked at at the child with both pity, envy and shock. "She made a pun. This can't be good." He said as he jumped into the portal, abruptly arriving at the Aperture Science Enrichment Center.
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A/N: if anyone wants to know where I got the android's name from;
Thomas Rookery
T. Rookery
Trickery
He wasn't telling many lies. In fact, mostly half-truths.
Next time, Dumbledore delivers Harry's letter.