A Letter to My Beloved – Kakashi Hatake One-shot
To My Beloved Husband,
"Remember when I was young and so were you
and time stood still and love was all we knew
You were the first, so was I
We made love and then you cried
Remember when"
Hey, Kakashi…Do you remember when we were young? About the time when I was eighteen and you were nineteen. We had been dating for well over a year by then. Hehehe…. Remember that night? The night you became my first, and I yours. I remember crying afterwards. Despite how much I loved you, I was afraid…that after we were together in such a way….you might start to think it was a mistake. Heh…You held me and told me that that there was no one else you would rather be with than me and that loving me would never be a mistake. And then you asked me a question that changed our lives forever. I was so happy; I think I cried even more! Do you remember?
"Remember when we vowed the vows
and walked the walk
Gave our hearts, made the start, it was hard
We lived and learned, life threw curves
There was joy, there was hurt
Remember when"
We were engaged for nearly two years after that night. It certainly took a little while, didn't it? Everyone started getting so impatient with us! But planning a wedding isn't exactly an easy thing to do, especially when one or both of us are given missions that could last a couple of months. But we finally said our vows in front of everyone we held dear, even those that were no longer actually with us. Hehehe…Remember the looks people gave us when we said that we wanted to be married in front of the K.I.A. memorial stone? So many people tried to convince us to hold it somewhere else, but we were both dead set on having it right there. Of course, once we explained our reasoning, nobody said another word about the subject.
The first year of our marriage was kind of hard wasn't it? Life certainly wanted to throw in a few curves! Naturally, I won't say that it was bad, because not all of it was. There were a lot of good times that year for us. But…there were also some bad times too. Like that time you had went on a mission that was only supposed to last for two weeks, but you ended up being gone for a month. For a long time, I had been so scared something terrible had happened to you. I had to keep reminding myself that you are Kakashi Hatake. You're the Copy-Cat Ninja. You're Kakashi of the Sharingan. And most importantly, you're my husband. There was also that time…when I found out I was pregnant. We were both so happy, but we were scared too. After a little bit, our fear melted away and we became genuinely happy to become parents. However, that happiness shattered when I miscarried. I remember crying for the longest time. You cried too, remember? I became so depressed and it seemed like our love started to fade. Did you feel that way too?
"Remember when old ones died and new were born
And life was changed, disassembled, rearranged
We came together, fell apart
And broke each other's hearts
Remember when"
Sometime after that, my parents passed away. First had been my mother and then just a few days later, my father followed after her. I had been so heart broken, but I knew that they had lived their lives and that they were in a better place. You held me and comforted me the whole time during their funerals.
It was in the third year of our marriage that everything seemed to just fall apart just when I felt like we were finally brought back together. We had drifted away from each other, I guess. Do you remember when we broke each other's hearts that year? I had been walking back home when I had caught sight of you in someone else's arms. At first I thought maybe it wasn't what it looked like, but the longer I watched the more I realized that maybe you just didn't love me anymore. I felt like that fear I had back on the night we first made love had come true. I ran home as fast as I could and cried my heart out. Not just for me though; For the both of us, and for the baby I had just found out was growing within me. I wonder if you noticed at all that I had been crying when you finally got home? Did you? I never did ask.
The next day, I packed up most of my belongings and moved into the house that my parents had left behind for me. You had been gone on a mission at the time so you didn't know until a week later when you finally came back. I remember when you showed up on the front porch. You asked me why I was here and not at home. I remember the confused look you gave me when I told you that the place we had lived was no longer my home. You asked what I was talking about. So…I told you everything from the doctor's visit to the time I moved into my childhood home. It took everything in me not to cry. I guess my everything wasn't good enough that day. When I finished talking, we were both quiet for the longest time. After a while, you asked me if I could ever forgive you. When you said that, I wondered if you were asking because you still loved me and actually still wanted to be with me, or if it was because I was pregnant with your child. That was…if I didn't end up miscarrying again. I told you I didn't know. You may not know it, but I wanted nothing more than to tell you yes the moment I saw you cry, but I was afraid you would just break my heart again.
"Remember when the sound of little feet
was the music
We danced to week to week
Brought back the love, we found trust
Vowed we'd never give it up
Remember when"
During the months following, you did everything you could to prove to me that you would never break my heart in such a way again. It took me a while, but finally you convinced me. Or maybe it was the dangos that convinced me? Hehehe…just kidding! Though, I think they certainly helped! I'm glad you were there for me when I finally gave birth to our first child, Obito. I remember when you cried when I told you that I wanted to name our son after the teammate that died to save your life. I could tell it meant so much to you. About a year and a half after Obito, we finally had our little girl, Rin who we named in honor of your other deceased teammate. I think our children helped us find the love and trust we thought we almost lost. Remember when we both promised to never let anything tear us apart like that again?
"Remember when thirty seemed so old
Now lookn' back it's just a steppin' stone
To where we are,
Where we've been
Said we'd do it all again
Remember when"
Remember when we thought thirty seemed so old? I guess no one could blame us with everything that we had been through and were still going through. At the time, a war was going on and we were forced to watch as our friends and students fought and died. We also had to watch as the other did the same. We nearly did die back then. One time, you actually did. But you were brought back to me. I don't know what I would have done without you by my side. I wonder if the pain I felt had been what Kurenai had felt when Asuma died? Probably. If something had happened, I know she would have helped me through it.
When looking back to that time, I guess it was just another stepping stone in our lives. Though, I think we can both agree it was a rather big one! One thing I know for sure though, I would do it all again if it meant spending my life with you. I know I hurt a lot, but when I look at what came out of that hurt, I can't really complain. Do you feel the same, Kakashi?
"Remember when we said when we turned gray
When the children grow up and move away
We won't be sad, we'll be glad
For all the life we've had
And we'll remember when"
As we grew older, so did our children. They both followed in our footsteps and became ninja. Hehehe….Remember the look on Naruto's face when he found out Obito was just like you and the boy he was named after. He was always late. You just told poor Naruto that he should be used to it by now. I remember his face so well. Of course, Sakura became the teacher of our little Ren. And just like the girl she was named after, Rin became such a wonderful medic. I can honestly say that I'm proud of both of our children. I'm not sad that they grew up and moved away. We both knew it was going to happen. All we could do for them was be there when they needed us and even when they didn't sometime. I was glad they had grown into such wonderful people.
Kakashi, I am happy I lived this life with you. There was no one I would rather have spent it with than you. I'm sorry that I had to leave before you, but don't worry! We'll be together again one day. And when we are, we can once again walk hand in hand together again and the first thing I'll say to you is "I love you, Kakashi."
With Much Love,
Your wife
[Reader's Name] Hatake.
With a shaking hand, Kakashi put down the letter that had once been written by his late wife. It had been only a few years since [Name] had passed away. She had been sick and no one could find the cure to heal her. Kakashi had been crushed, but his children and former students had helped him through her passing. [Name] had written the letter while she was in the hospital. [Name] had made their daughter Rin promise to only give it to him when she was sure he could handle reading it. And so for a year, Rin kept the letter a secret.
When Kakashi was finally given the letter, he could remember weeping so much as the memories came flooding back. Soon after, reading [Name's] letter became a habit to Kakashi. He swore, every time he started to read the words written so elegantly on the paper, Kakashi could hear his wife's sweet voice reading it aloud.
Now, as Kakashi sat on his bed, he found that he was ready to see his beloved wife once more. Laying down, he closed his eyes, only to open them a moment later when a bright light appeared. Kakashi found himself standing in a meadow of flowers. And there standing in front of him was a young, beautiful woman smiling at him and holding out her hand. Reaching out to take her hand, Kakashi heard the words he had been waiting to hear for what seemed to be a very long time. "I love you, Kakashi."