CHANGE AND DEVELOPMENT

This last case has changed me. It not only changed my opinions on certain things but it has given me some clarification. It has made me realise the depth of my relationship with Booth. ……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Two bodies, male and female, had been found on the embankment of Lake Washington. They lay facing one another, each grasping the other's hand. They were two souls connected even in death. They were searching for the impossible sanctuary that would

shelter them from the darkness.

I have seen many brutal murders but this particular scene before me managed to infect my very being to the point of sickness. Booth has a sixth sense about my feelings. He could tell that I wasn't ready to perform the initial assessment.

"Hey Bones can I talk to you for a minute?" He gently got hold of my elbow and pulled me off to the side. He positioned me so that I was supported by a tree. He carefully put his hands on my shoulders to get my attention.

"Are you ok?" Such a simple question but I found it impossible to answer.

At that stage I didn't know why I was affected so much. It wasn't until I reflected on the case that I realised it was because these two lovers had been denied the chance to love. This was ground breaking for me because I didn't believe in love.

I looked into his eyes and saw the unquestionable comfort he was offering. I knew he wanted to sweep me up into his arms and take me away from the scene which was causing me so much distress. I could also see uncertainty in his eyes. He didn't know if I would allow him to protect me like that. From that one look I could tell exactly what he was feeling. He and Angela were the only people that I that strong connection with.

I offered him some comfort by taking one of his hands from my shoulder and holding it. It that one gesture I reassured him that I would be ok and I thanked him for his comfort. I quickly smiled at him and broke of our physical connection. He realised that this was my way of saying lets get back to the case. He dropped his other hand from my shoulder and stepped back allowing me room to move from behind the tree. We walked back to the bank and I began the initial assessment

"Booth, can you get my bag?"

"Only since you asked so politely." Booth replied sarcastically. We looked at each other and smiled. Business as usually. Once he returned with the bag I got out my tape recorder and started my preliminary observation

"One male approximately 20-23 years. One female approximately 19-21 years. Both bodies have been burned to the point of skin removal. No obvious defensive wounds on the male, suggesting he was attacked first. The female has some defensive markers on her forearms. However it appears that both were unconscious when burned. No fatal wounds are present; fire was the cause of death. Gasoline is present on the bodies. Both bodies have minor injuries. Male has one broken flagella, 2 broken ribs. Female has a shattered femur, consistent with a crashing injury. Bodies appear to have been burned together indicated by their connected hands." I looked up at Booth to see if he had any questions. He shook his head and offered his hand to help me up. I accepted and allowed him to help me from my kneeling position.

"Ok this body needs to be shipped to the Jeffersonian. I want the bodies to remain in this position so find a way to ship them like that. I also want samples of the surrounding area, including water samples from the lake. Any questions? Good, get to work." Booth shouted at the surrounding FBI agents.

I laughed softly as we moved to the car. Booth looked at me questioningly over the roof of the car.

"Someone's a fast learner." He gave me the cockiest charm smile I have ever seen. The comment had gone straight to his head.

"I have to try and remember that your head inflates easily." He chuckled softly and gave me the most sincere look before saying, "I learn from the best."

I'm still not comfortable with compliments so I quickly got into the car. As he got into the car he laughed softly at my uneasiness.

"Come on Bones. You can take a compliment better than that" I gave him a murderous look.

"Ok ok, easy" He said while putting up his hands to surrender.

"Just drive." Booth did just that. We came to an arrangement a couple of weeks ago that I wouldn't question who was driving if he didn't help me get into and out of a car. So far the arrangement had been working well.

It took my team three days to identify the victim and find the killer. The case was hard for everyone, especially Angela. Angela was a romantic and the thought of two lovers cut down in their prime particularly disturbed her. Angela's feelings had most probably been apart of my discovery about love. She got great satisfaction when the killer was identified and apprehended.

It is always satisfying when a killer is put behind bars. The killer was a man named Antonio Qures. Two days prior to killing the young couple he saw his girlfriend kiss another man on the same embankment that would later become the crime scene. He followed them to a house where he waiting outside until the man left the next morning. He would have gone up and killed his girlfriend but her family was visiting that weekend.

Early the next day, Antonio went back to that park and saw the two young lovers who we identified as Matthew Stone and Rachel McDrew. They were of similar appearance to his girlfriend and lover. They had also unfortunately chosen to sit in the same spot on the embankment. It was early so there was no one to witness Antonio's crime. Antonio beat them to unconsciousness, first with a stone, and then a boulder. Rachel's crushing injury was due to this boulder being thrown onto her leg. Antonio first struck Matthew on the head, knocking him unconscious, before moving onto Rachel. Once both were unconscious he dowsed them with gasoline and then lite them on fire.

The leading factor that lead us to Antonio was his mistake of buying the gasoline from a nearby shop. At first we were not confident that this was our man but Booth followed his instinct. Booth brought him in for interrogation.

Mr Qures confessed immediately, "The girl begged me to leave precious Matt alone. When I turned on her she grasped his hand with one of her own and the other she used to shield her face. A week ago I lived peacefully in this world, never for one moment thinking that I would find so much pleasure in murder." I looked disgustingly at him for his lack of remorse. This man was truly a killer. He saw my look and smiled creepily at me. "Doctor Brennan, I would have thought you'd appreciated the anthropological need for a female to seek comfort in a male." I was sickened that he was even looking at me but I did not give him the pleasure of showing any weakness.

Booth smashed his hand down on the table before yelling at Antonio, "Do not even look at her."

"Ah I was wondering when you would fire up Agent Booth. I feel it's a compliment that the FBI sent their best. Are you surprised Agent Booth that I know about Doctor Brennan's partnership with the FBI? She is after all a world renowned forensic anthropologist and author. Actually, I know a lot about you, Temperance."

At that point Booth lost all control. He grabbed Antonio and threw him against the wall. Booth got right up into his face and told Mr Qures that if he ever spoke, looked or even thought about me again that he would have a quick burial. Mr Qures just laughed.

I quickly moved forward and grabbed Booth's hand that was pinned to Mr Qures's throat. I pulled Booth out of the room and down the corridor. I could see how tense he was so decided that now was not the time to berate him about his alpha male tendencies. I still held tightly onto his hand because I could feel his need to go back into that room.

"Booth you just did exactly what he wanted." He dislodged his hand from mine and rubbed his face in frustration.

"I know but God he was sickening. It took all my strength to refrain from hitting him earlier. But when he turned on you I couldn't control myself anymore." He spoke that last sentence quiet enough so only I could hear it.

Before I could respond we heard Antonio chanting my name from the interrogation room. "Temperance, Temperance, Temperance." Booth began to storm back into the room but I quickly stopped him. I firmly placed my hands on his chest and told him very directly,

"If you go into that room you will have let him win this little mind game he's playing with you."

Booth looked at me and I could see the fire raging in his eyes. I moved one of my hands down until I held one of his. He followed the journey of my hand with his eyes. He kept his gaze on our joint hands. He slowly lifted his head until our eyes met. His eyes were once again calmed. I nodded softly and smiled at him before walking him out the building. His hand intertwined with mine as we walked to the car.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

This case has definitely changed me. I see that although there is darkness in the world, there is love to combat it. In this particular case darkness initially won because Antonio had brutally killed Sam and Rachel but in the end he was captured and a little bit of darkness was removed from the world.

I now realise the power and importance of love. I moved on from this case with a brighter outlook on life. I will never admit this to Angela but it has also made me look at my relationship with Booth. We are great partners and friends but could that partnership strengthen if we entered into a loving relationship? I have now realised that I do in fact love Booth but can I risk ruining our working relationship? I am too scared of losing what we have. This case has broken down another of my walls. The question now is, can I have a relationship with Booth?

I also acknowledge the change that has occurred within me. 6 months ago I would have never been the one to instigate a simple touch let alone one laced with intimacy. My mind and body has become one with Booth. What will the future bring to our developing relationship?