"You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." - from Hook
"Chi!" yelled Riku. "Are you coming with us or not?"
Chihiro jogged up to meet her friends in the bleachers. She was exhausted to say the least. She just finished track practice and was dripping in sweat. She was still trying to catch her breath as she responded.
"No. That's ok. You guys go on ahead. I want to stop by the park for a bit." said Chihiro. She typically stopped by the park behind the development complex on her way home from school. The area always relaxed her, and right now that was just what she needed.
"You always go there though! Come spend time with us." whined Riku.
"Yeah, but it's the first nice day of spring. "I havn't been able to go with all the snow making the stream flood."
"Fine" grumbled Riku. "But you owe us! We'll catch up with you tomorrow." She waved goodbye to Chihiro, and the group of girls filtered out of the stands.
"Bye!" yelled Chihiro, waving her hand as they passed. Once the girls were out of sight, she quickly wiped the sweat from her brow before reaching back to grab her schoolbag. She felt her muscles protest the sudden movement, as she slung the bag over her shoulder and started the short walk over to the park. Her body ached from the hard practice, and she looked forward to finally getting a chance to sit down again. All she wanted was to sit in her favorite spot and enjoy the day. It had been too cold to visit the park recently, so she wanted to take advantage of the nice weather while she could.
She hurriedly made her way down side streets before arriving at her destination. She maneuvered through the winding park paths, the gravel crunching beneath her feet until she finally reached a great maple tree nestled along the stream's bank. Most of its young buds were just starting to form, but a few small stray leaves of soft gold and pink grew among the branches. Chihiro sighed in relief as she sunk to the ground, her backpack flung to the side. She felt the stress in her body begin to dissipate as she settled back against the tree's trunk and took in the scene around her. The park was alive with people. Kids were playing ball in the field next to her, while a couple was sitting on the bench a little way over. The entire apartment complex seemed to be relaxing in the park and enjoying the day. More couples strolled down the paths, and a few people tried their luck at fishing downstream. The sun sat high in the sky and shined brightly on the water next to her. The development complex originally rerouted the river underground to make way for the buildings. Over the years though, the apartments grew in popularity, and the residents decided they wanted a park to enjoy. The complex soon started construction on the park, and a part of the original river was unearthed during the process. While much of the river was still diverted underground, a small flow remained above. Chihiro loved to sit by the stream's bank. During the summer months, she would dip her toes in its cool depths and feel the water rush over her. But, it was still slightly chilly today, so she settled herself with just overlooking its edge.
Occasionally, Chihiro heard the kids laughing loudly or the fishermen bemoaning their luck. However, the area was usually quiet. She could always come here to find a peaceful place to read or relax, and sitting under the tall maple tree made her feel connected to nature in a special way. Maybe that was why Chihiro loved this place so much. The time spent here was spiritual in a way. She enjoyed the activity of nature around her and the stillness it brought to her own life. She felt removed from her daily troubles. She didn't find herself caring about her growing pile of homework or preparing for her track meet in two weeks. She just felt still. The rush of water eased any anxiety she held, and she basked in the warm sun. She held these quiet moments dear to her.
Now at ease, Chihiro finally felt how tired she was. Her muscles ached after her hard run, and she started to feel her eyelids grow heavy. Her day finally caught up to her. Just a quick nap wouldn't hurt. She would still be home in time for dinner. She laid her head back against the tree's trunk, and her eyes gently drifted shut.
Chihiro was surprised to find herself in a large field of rolling hills. Lush grass blew around her. The breeze ruffled her hair and carried a faint floral scent. As she observed her surroundings, she realized exactly where she was. In a moment, she was bounding up the hill towards the babbling creek. The water's gurgling became louder as she ran faster and faster. When she finally reached its bank, she saw him on the opposite shore. He had changed since she last saw him here. He was taller, towering a good head over her. His dark green hair now grazed his shoulders, but his eyes were still the same jade green. They pierced her, and she was off running.
"Haku." She whispered before she launched herself at him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his lithe form as if he could disappear at any moment. His body jerked back as her weight knocked him off balance, and they found themselves falling to the ground. He tried to brace their fall, but they tumbled down into the creek, landing in a wet heap. Their clothes were soaked, and Haku's hair clung to his face. Wet, shivering, and still in the water, they just stared at one another. Neither could stop the smiles from spreading across their faces though.
She couldn't believe he was here, in front of her after so many years. "How?" she whispered. She was still breathless and trying to take in all that had happened in the past five minutes. She held her breath, waiting for an answer.
"I told you we would see each other again." He replied. His voice was deeper than she remembered. The words rolled off his tongue like velvet. There was power behind his voice though. Her friend had definitely grown over the years. His inky green hair clung to his chiseled jaw, and he radiated strength. She could feel the difference, and she suddenly became acutely aware of his body under her. Their wet clothes clung to them awkwardly, making his form more perceptible then before. She could feel his taut chest muscles under her hands, and she quickly jumped off of Haku. She tried to straighten out her clothes, and mumbled apologies. A large blush spread across her face, turning her cheeks pink. The color rose to the tips of her ears when Haku started roaring with laughter.
"You're as clumsy as ever" he laughed.
He stood up from the river, took her hand in his and guided her to the bank. The wind blew around them, and Chihiro shivered in response. The wet clothes and wind chilled her, but no sooner had she put her arms around her shivering form when Haku made a small gesture with his hand. A great rush of water splashed down at her feet, and suddenly her clothes were bone dry. She stared at him in amazement. Her mouth was agape in a very unattractive pose, resembling a fish. With another hand flick water seemed to drop from Haku's clothing and rained to the ground with another loud splash.
"You look so impressed" he remarked, and she could hear the joy in his voice. His one eyebrow quirked upward, and a smug smile touched his lips.
"I've become quite proficient at using magic now. Having my name back helped a lot" he continued, and just like that any trace of arrogance was gone. In its place, he became solemn.
"It's all thanks to you." His voice was softer, and Chihiro blushed at his words. Her face seemed to be continuously flushed ever since she saw him again.
"I should be the one thanking you" murmured Chihiro. "without you I'd still be working at the bath house as Sen." However, the weight of the situation descended on her, and Chihiro's voice pitched upward.
"But Haku! Why can't I remember you? Why can I only remember now when I'm here again?" She paused for a moment. "How am I here again?" questioned Chihiro. Her mind tried to wrap around what just happened. Seeing him again after all these years awakened more questions. Why had it taken so long for them to reunite? Why can she only recall him now? How was he doing? Did he gain his freedom? All these questions swirled in her mind, dizzying her. The situation was almost too much to comprehend, and she stared up at him with wide, incredulous eyes.
He merely shook his head. "Humans aren't meant to remember the spirit world. There's a separation of the worlds. While you'll never truly forget, you'll also never truly remember." His reply was more enigmatic than she had hoped. Regardless, she pressed on.
"I still missed you though. I know that now. Why havn't you come to me sooner?" her voice wavered at the end. The question hung in the air between them. She tried to not show how much his absence affected her, but the mournful look in his eyes told her all she needed to know.
"I have. I've been with you for years now." His deep voice rolled over her, and she gazed up at him confused. He touched her cheek gently. His fingertips barely made contact, but she felt her face flush anyway. His eyes held a strange emotion to them, something she hadn't seen in him since years before. After all these years, she had thought she would have a lot to say to him, but right now she was at a loss.
"It's almost time for you to go." He spoke softly, barely above a whisper. His hand was no longer touching her, and she missed the warmth he brought. Haku took a step back from her.
"Don't worry. We'll see each other again. I promise" he stated more confidently than before. He said the words so finitely that Chihiro believed them utterly. However, that didn't stop the panic that settled into her when she felt herself be pulled away from him. The distance between them seemed to increase, and she suddenly realized that she was dreaming. Chihiro found herself drifting back into consciousness. Not fully yet though. She tried to hang onto her dream. It was too soon. She just saw him again. She couldn't leave now.
"Haku!" she yelled. "Please, I can't go back. I want to stay here with you. I can't forget again."
Chihiro struggled to get back to him, but she found the distance between them growing with each second. He was still next to the river, but she found herself on the opposite shore, quickly retreating to the field beyond. No. This isn't what she wanted. She wanted to be with him, to stay in this dream with him. There was so much more she wanted to know. She strained to run forward, to run towards him. But, she was fighting a losing battle. She could feel herself start to come back to reality. She continued to fight, but before she was fully awake, she heard Haku's voice.
"I love you," he whispered. The words were so quiet, Chihiro might have missed them had not the gravity of the words affected her.
His voice rang in her ears, and she felt like she could live in this moment forever, here with him. His eyes stared into her, and she could see the depth of his feelings in his gaze. She never wanted to wake up. She wanted to stay in this place between sleep and reality and just bask in this feeling. She finally felt complete, and just as she was going to respond, she woke up. The words died on the tip of her tongue, and Chihiro stared blankly around her. The sun was just starting to set, and a rosy haze was cast on the park around her. The sun reflected off the stream, and the light shone in her face. Her eyes blinked lazily, as she tried to become alert. She couldn't remember what she was dreaming about, but she knew she did dream something. She could feel it. It wrapped around her mind like a blanket, something comfortable and warm. She glanced down at her watch, wondering just what time it was. When the clock read half past 6, she knew she had been out for too long. She quickly stood up, stretched, and slung her backpack up over her shoulder.
As she got ready to head home, a white blur caught her eye. For a split second, she thought she saw a dragon. Like a white snake darting through the sky. But, it was gone in an instant. Chihiro rubbed her eyes with the back of her hands and tried to bring herself back to focus. She must have been more tired than she realized. She yawned slightly and started the journey back to her house. After going a few paces, she turned back to look at the stream briefly before continuing her walk.
A/N:
When thinking of ideas to write about, this quote from Hook got stuck in my head. I loved how it fit with Chihiro and Haku's story. In interviews, Miyazaki has said that he doesn't believe Chihiro would remember Haku (which breaks my heart) or her time in the spirit world. I want to believe that a small piece of her remembers him, and they will continue to love each other in this way. Spirited Away is one of my favorite movies, and I hope I do the characters justice in this.